Chapter 3 - "To The Last Gasp, With Truth And Loyalty"
After the gravity of his confrontation with the board, Cas wanted to shift gears and focus on something a bit more positive. "Let's go see Chuck," he said to Gail, extending his hand for her to take.
When they had first disappeared from the boardroom, Cas had brought them to Bobby's office, which he supposed was his, today. He wasn't sure why he had wanted to come here; maybe it was just the very human impulse to sit in God's chair, for a moment.
Castiel stood in front of the desk, hesitating, unsure as to how to proceed. He pictured his Father, who had sat there for all those years. Though they had not had that many one-on-one meetings here, considering how long they had both been around, now that he was here, he didn't know if he could actually bring himself to do it.
"Go ahead," Gail said, smiling. "Just for a moment, anyway. I'm sure He won't mind." She didn't have to be God to read his mind at that moment; she knew her Cas very well.
He sat down in the chair, looking at her. "How does it feel?" she asked him.
"Weird," he responded.
Gail continued to smile. "I wish I had a camera right now," she teased, "to record this for posterity."
He smiled back, but then he rose from the chair and came over to where she stood. "Doesn't really suit me, anyway," he told her. "I think I'm more of a 'hands-on' God."
Gail considered resisting her natural impulse, for a split second; they were in God's office, after all. But she just couldn't help herself. "I'm certainly hoping so," she teased him, moving in closer.
"Really, Gail?" Cas said, imitating Dean.
They both laughed, and Gail thought of her brother at the bunker with Bobby and the Winchesters. She hoped they were all getting along.
That was when Cas had said he wanted to go see Chuck, so they went to the library.
"Are you happy here, Chuck?" Cas asked him.
Chuck looked at him, a little taken aback by the question. "Yes, I am, Cas," he said sincerely. Then he smiled. "At least, now that your tribunal is over and you're actually, you know, alive." He smiled at Gail, and she smiled back. Then Chuck's smile faded a bit. "I guess there's really no need for the ABH any more, though. That's too bad, in a way. I enjoyed getting the group together, and we enjoyed rattling Xavier's cage." He sighed. "Even though we couldn't stop them from..." He trailed off. Cas's execution had been hard on him, too.
"How would you like to chair the new board, then?" Cas asked him.
Chuck stared at him. "The new board?" he echoed.
"Yes," Cas replied, smiling. "There isn't one any more, but I think there's still a need for one. You can vote on issues as a group, and help Bobby with the bureaucratic end of things. Just between you and me, that's not his strong suit."
Chuck began to smile. He already had a couple of things in mind to suggest to Bobby, and he knew Kevin would, too. This could be just the ticket. "Who else is going to be on the board, Cas?"
Now it was Cas's turn to be startled. He'd just thought that Chuck and Bobby could take it from there. How the hell did he know who should be on the board? He said this to Chuck now, and Chuck looked surprised. "You're Upper Echelon, aren't you?" Chuck said, but Cas was frowning.
"No," he said to Chuck. "We're not going to use terms like that any more. No one's upper, no one's lower. We're all equals, and we should have an equal say as to the kind of Heaven we want to have."
Chuck was impressed. Way to go, Cas, he thought.
Cas looked sideways at Gail. "You've been awfully quiet," he said to her.
She smiled. "What exactly are you trying to say?" she teased. "That I talk a lot?"
But Cas wasn't taking the bait. He smiled gently. "Simply that I value your opinion," he said.
Chuck silently congratulated Cas again. God or not, he obviously knew a thing or two about discretion being the better part of valour, sometimes. Chuck smiled at that thought.
"I do have an opinion, in fact," Gail said to them, "and you can quit smiling, Chuck, I see you," she continued, pretending to be annoyed.
Cas was enjoying this. Who would have ever thought that he and Gail would be sitting here talking to Chuck like this? If anyone had told him that a year ago, Cas would have thought that they were crazy. Of course, if anyone had told him that he would be executed, revived by Crowley, and promoted to God all within the space of 48 hours, he would have personally escorted them to the facility where Bobby had been recently, he thought with a smile. Not to mention the fact that nearly a year ago, he had been the loneliest Angel since Creation, about to lose his faith and about to perish from depleted Grace, until Gail had come along, and restored both. How blessed he had been.
But Gail was speaking now. "I think the board should have at least one female member. Maybe two, depending on how many you're planning on sitting," she said.
Chuck agreed. "Absolutely," he told her. "You'll be one, of course, and - "
Gail interrupted him. "I don't know about that, Chuck. We're based on Earth; we probably won't be here all that much." She looked to Castiel for confirmation, and saw that he was thinking the same thing. They'd both had about enough of Heaven recently, and Gail would want to spend some time with her brother. And he missed Sam and Dean, as he was sure that she did, too.
He took Gail's hand absently, looking at Chuck. "Gail's right; we probably won't be here often enough to attend that many meetings," he mused. But, he agreed with her; there should be female representation on the board. It would be about time. He said this to Chuck now.
Chuck nodded. "It IS about time," he said, smiling.
Gail was pleased that he agreed. "So you'll arrange for that, then?" she asked Chuck.
"Arrange for what?" he asked, smiling. "I was thinking that it's about time I saw you two holding hands."
Now Chuck was teasing. But Gail was happy to play along. "Now that Castiel is God, he thinks he's too good for me," she joked. She looked at Cas. "Actually, he might be."
They all laughed. "Hardly," Cas said, smiling. Maybe the other way around, he thought. But he felt good about what he'd done so far today, and he was eager to do more for his friends. So he sent out a call to Kevin on Angel Radio, telling him to expect a visit momentarily.
Gail hugged Chuck and he and Cas shook hands, and they left the library, Chuck smiling after them.
They told Kevin about their conversation with Chuck, and Kevin was likewise excited about the prospect of forming a new board. He also expressed his opinion that both Castiel and Gail should be board members, but they told him the same thing they had told Chuck.
"Still, we'll put your names on the roster," Kevin insisted. "You can sit in once in a while, see what we're doing, and give us your opinions. And vote, too, if there's anything to be voted on."
Gail looked at Cas and smiled. "Sounds good. You could be the Chairman of the Board. If it was good enough for Sinatra, it's certainly good enough for you."
"You guys are more like the President and the First Lady," Kevin said, smiling. But he wasn't joking, not really. That had actually been Becky's line, but Kevin thought it had been a pretty apt one. Many of the younger Angels in the ABH felt the same way. Castiel and Gail were a shining example to them all, both as a couple, and as individuals.
Gail was amused. Barack and Michelle, Castiel and Gail. She'd take it, she thought. But she told Kevin that she'd like to see full-time female representation on the board.
"I think we should ask Patricia," Kevin said. "She's really smart, and she's been here for quite a while. Maybe she and Chuck could be co-chairs."
Sounded good to Gail. She remembered talking to Patricia briefly at the ABH meeting, and Gail remembered her asking about Bobby, and where he was. She'd had the feeling that Patricia was pretty sharp, and the fact that Patricia had joined the ABH even though she was a longer-serving Angel had impressed Gail.
"She thinks the world of Bobby," Kevin continued, smiling, "so she has that going for her, too. She was thrilled to hear that he was back."
There was something in Kevin's expression that made Gail ask, "How thrilled was she, Kevin?" She smiled.
Castiel looked a little taken aback at that. Was Kevin suggesting what he thought he was suggesting? But, Bobby was God... Then, Castiel gave himself a mental head shake. So was he at the moment, and look at himself with Gail. He was hardly one to say anything. If Bobby and Patricia liked each other and wanted to have a relationship, why should they not? Now that Xavier and the board were gone, they could all have the kind of Heaven they'd envisioned. He was sure that Bobby would want to revise and update the ancient rules, something which his Father had given His blessing to, when He had been here recently. And that would be a good thing. Perhaps some good had come out of their ordeal at the tribunal, after all.
Kevin then advised that Ignatius had come to see him, and Kevin had been able to do an Internet search for Felicia. Luckily, Xavier had left Kevin's computer alone when he had removed most of them from Heaven's offices, and Kevin had been able to give Ignatius all the information he had been able to glean. Ignatius had thanked him profusely, and had gone to Earth to begin his quest.
"Oh, and I made the deposit in Sam and Dean's account as you requested, Cas," Kevin told him. "I've never seen that many zeroes in someone's account before, and I'm sure they never have, either."
Cas smiled. He was proud of himself for having had that idea, and now, he made that joke about the next round being on Dean that he'd been too nervous to make earlier. As Kevin smiled at that, Cas thought about the four men who were now in the bunker, drinking beer and swapping stories. As Gail and Kevin had been talking, he's snuck a peek at them, and he'd been gratified to see that Frank was fitting in nicely, and that his friends genuinely liked Gail's brother. He was glad that things were working out on that score. He'd heard Frank's teasing comments about him and Gail, and Castiel wondered if he should have a private chat with Frank about that, convince her brother that his intentions were entirely honourable when it came to Gail. Castiel had been around for many, many years, and he was at heart an old-fashioned guy. He smiled to himself. He guessed it was funny to think that way, in the context of their world. Castiel was God at the moment, Frank had recently been a Knight of Hell, and Cas was worried about what Gail's brother might think of HIM?
But that was a topic for later, and he was wasting time woolgathering. Cas still had something very serious to talk to Kevin about.
"It's my fault your mother died at Jason's hand," he said to Kevin, frowning. "And I mean to make it right."
Kevin looked alarmed. He appreciated what Cas was saying, but: "That wasn't your fault, Cas. It was that bastard Jason, and Xavier, too."
"True, but I bear the responsibility," Cas insisted. "If I had been here to answer the charges, she would still be alive."
Gail felt somber at that thought, and she took Cas's hand. She felt guilty about that, as well. Maybe if they'd come back sooner, Jason wouldn't have felt the need to kill Kevin's mom. She would normally have tried to say something soothing to Cas, but he was right, in this situation. "I'm sorry too, Kevin," she said to the young Prophet. "You were protecting us, and we're both responsible for what happened to her."
Kevin was really upset now, and he was about to protest again, but Cas held up his hand. "As God, I can rescue your mother from limbo," he told Kevin. "The only question is, where should she go?"
Kevin was startled. "What do you mean, Cas?" He remembered Xavier having told him his mother was in limbo, but he'd been so angry and grief-stricken at the time that he hadn't been able to process what Xavier had been telling him.
"Your mother is between worlds at the moment, in a manner of speaking," Cas explained to Kevin as gently as he could. "There has been no disposition of her soul. So she can be returned to Earth as a human woman, or she can ascend to Heaven, to become an Angel. But she's not able to make the call. That's supposed to be up to God to decide."
"Are you telling me you're going to make the decision?" Kevin asked Cas.
"No, I'm not," Castiel told him. "You are."
Kevin thought for a moment. Wow. What a responsibility. Was this what it was like to be God? He'd have to be nicer to Bobby, next time he saw him.
"How the hell am I supposed to decide that?" Kevin breathed.
"Don't think, just say the first thing that comes into your head," Gail said. "What would your mom want? What's her number-one priority?"
"Me," Kevin answered quickly. Then he realized he already knew what the right thing was to do: "She would want to be with me." He looked at Gail gratefully. "Thanks, Gail. She needs to be an Angel, Cas."
There went Gail, piercing to the heart of the matter again, Cas thought. "Maybe YOU should be God," he teased her.
She smiled at both of them. "I don't know if Heaven's ready for that, yet," she joked. "We just got our first female board member, today. Besides, I think some of my decisions might be unpopular. If I turn the corner and see one more white wall, I might lose it, and paint everything psychedelic."
Castiel stood, smiling at her and Kevin. "I'll be right back," he told them; then he leaned down to Kevin, pretending to look suspiciously at Gail. "Maybe you and Chuck should hide all the paintbrushes, while I'm gone."
Kevin and Gail laughed, and Cas winked out of the room.
Gail turned back to look at Kevin. "Now that God's gone for a minute, we can talk about what's really important. What's going on between you and Becky?" Her tone was light, but Gail was frankly curious. She liked both of the young Angels, and she thought that Kevin could be very good for Becky. Gail had no idea that Becky had been in love with Sam for years now, and had killed herself over Sam's rejection of her.
Kevin hesitated. He still didn't know Gail all that well, but he could use a woman's point of view, and she was offering an ear. "I don't know, Gail," he sighed. "I really like her, and I know she likes me too, but..." He searched for the right words. "Sometimes, when she's looking at me, I feel like she's looking at someone else. Does that even make sense?"
Actually, it did, and his statement made Gail a little uneasy. For some reason, an image of Aurielle flashed into her mind, just then. But, that was ridiculous. Becky was an innocent and naive girl, while Aurielle was... What was she, exactly? Psychotic? Obsessed? Dangerous? All of the above?
"Have you seen Aurielle, or Jason?" she blurted out.
Kevin was confused. They'd just been talking about Becky. Why had Gail said that?
"I'm sorry, Kevin," she said, seeing the look on his face. "When I have a chance, I'll talk to Becky, and see if I can get her to confide in me. But I had a vision, and I haven't told Cas about it." She told Kevin about the brief flash she'd had of Aurielle standing over Castiel, holding a book and painting some kind of symbols on his chest.
"It creeped me out, Kevin," she said, shuddering at the memory and the possible implications. Gail wasn't thinking of the spell book at the moment, as Bobby had told them it was still in his possession, and Gail had no reason to believe otherwise. Cas had told her that Bobby was to be impeached by Xavier over his relationship with Rowena just before they had gone on the run, but somewhat atypically, he had not mentioned the spell book Xavier had shown him. In his haste to get them going, Cas had omitted what he'd thought was a minor detail. It hadn't mattered so much at the time WHY Bobby was going to be impeached, only that he was sure to be. However, the image of her vision had remained in the back of Gail's head ever since she'd seen it in her mind's eye. But, she was no Prophet. Was this just a manifestation of her nervousness about Aurielle, and the fact that she had gone missing?
Kevin remembered the partial vision that he'd been having about Aurielle looking at a very old book, debating whether to toss it in the fireplace, then looking at it again. Chuck had interrupted him that day before he'd had a chance to see more, and he had not seen anything to do with Aurielle since.
He told Gail this now, and suggested she ask Chuck. Gail still didn't make a connection to the spell book. There must be lots of old books in Heaven, and Aurielle had been an Angel for a long time.
"I will at some point, but I didn't want to ask him today, and I didn't want to ask him while Cas was there," Gail said. She didn't know why; she just didn't want to bring this up to Castiel, and especially not today. Today was his day, and she didn't want to spoil it by bringing up such an uncomfortable subject.
Kevin thought she should definitely tell Cas about what she'd seen. He knew Gail was no Prophet, but since he was one himself, he believed in the power of intuition. He didn't think she was being silly, and even if she was, so what? Shouldn't Cas know about this?
But before he had the chance to tell Gail how he felt, Cas was back, and he had Kevin's mother with him.
Another happy, tearful reunion. Castiel and Gail stepped back, watching Kevin and Linda embrace.
"Everything worked out, Mom," Kevin said, smiling at his mother. She raised an eyebrow to him. "Well, you know what I mean," he finished sheepishly.
Linda touched her son's face. Yes, she knew. "You made the right decision, Kevin," she said to him, smiling. That must be why Cas had been gone a few minutes; he must have told Linda that it had been her son's decision to make her an Angel.
For her part, Linda was extremely proud of her son. Castiel told her that Kevin had not divulged his and Gail's whereabouts, and he had stood up to Xavier, when many other Angels would not. Her son was a hero, and he would go on to be one of Heaven's finest leaders, Cas was sure. Linda's heart swelled with the pride she felt. But then, she'd always known that Kevin was special.
Castiel's job here was done, and after receiving thanks from Kevin and a hug from Linda, he took Gail's hand. On to the next destination.
"Where are we going now?" Gail said to Cas as they exited Kevin's office. She was happy, excited; he was performing so many good deeds for their friends in his temporary role as God that the day was starting to feel like Christmas morning, everywhere they went. And hadn't she received the best present of all, first? Gail wanted this day to last forever, but she was also really looking forward to sitting down with Frank tomorrow, and talking until their voices were hoarse.
"A part of Heaven you've never been before," he said in his enigmatic way, and he took both of her hands in his now. "I hope you don't mind that I've never shown you this, before. I didn't think you'd ever want one for us; well, not here, anyway."
OK, now she was really curious. He winked her to a long hallway that seemed to stretch out forever, with multiple doors on both sides. The doors were numbered, but other than that, they all looked alike.
Great; another white hallway, she thought with wry amusement. What was so different about this one? And couldn't they at least hang a painting or something, to break up the monotony of all that white?
Castiel could hear her thoughts, and he smiled. He had been trying to shut it off today, but that one had snuck through. He loved her, but he didn't want to invade her privacy in that manner. Her thoughts were her own, and if there was something she wanted to share with him, she would. Intimacy was one thing; invasion of privacy was quite another. Besides, Gail had never seemed to have a problem with communicating her feelings clearly to him. Sometimes all too clearly, he thought with good humour.
"These are apartments," he told her. "Residences for the Angels."
Gail raised her eyebrows in surprise. But then, she guessed it only made sense. Just because they didn't sleep, surely God didn't require them to work all the time.
"Some choose apartments, others choose houses," Castiel continued. "Many want their dwelling to look as it did when they were alive, and there are quite a few families who choose houses, when they are all finally reunited."
Of course; that only made sense, too. Gail seemed to recall a Bible reading she had heard somewhere about that very thing. It gave her hope, and a feeling of warmth to know that family members could live together once they'd passed from the Earth. Hopefully, many, many, many years from now, Sam and Dean could have another bunker here together, and she and Cas could visit them there, as they did now. And now that Frank was a human again, she could look forward to popping into his place, as well. This was the best she had ever felt about Heaven.
"We could have had a place here, if we'd wanted," Cas said softly. "But I didn't really want one, and I didn't think you would, either. Maybe I should have asked you about it, though. We seem to be homeless, at the moment." He smiled wryly.
"No, you were right," she said to him. "Maybe one day, but for now, I prefer to stick to Earth."
"That's what I thought you'd say." He nodded. Another item on his To Do list, then.
He led the way down the corridor and knocked on one of the doors. Ethan opened the door, smiling widely. "Hey, Cas, hey Gail, come on in," he said to them.
Ethan had a nice apartment, Gail thought. Nothing fancy, to be sure, but it was cozy-looking. He saw her looking around. "I wanted it to look exactly like the apartment I had with Karen, and it does," he said to her. "And one day, she'll be here with me. Then in the future, our son will join us. Though by that time, God willing, he'll be old, and will have had a family of his own. Then he can have his own house, and his mother and I can visit the grandkids."
What a sweet image, Gail thought. She told him this.
Ethan smiled. "Thanks to you and Cas, it can happen, now," he said. "I never forgot what you said about what things would have been like under Xavier. That's why I joined the ABH. We should all have the right to be here together. And now my brother can get an apartment here too, when his time comes."
Gail's brow furrowed. "His brother is gay," Cas told her. "Just one of the things that Ethan and I talked about, when I was in prison. I told him about Barry and Tommy, that they were part of the reason we decided to come back."
Gail put her hand on Ethan's arm. "Thank you for being so kind to us throughout that whole thing," she said to him.
He smiled and said, "Where are my manners? Sit down, sit down."
Gail and Cas sat together on the couch, and Ethan sat in a chair across from them. The furniture was mismatched, which Gail found endearing. She could just imagine that this was exactly what Ethan and Karen's apartment had looked like on Earth. A young couple, just starting out in life, trying to make ends meet and feed and clothe a new baby.
She looked at the endtable. "All that's missing is a happy family photo," she said, then immediately regretted it as Ethan's smile faded. "I'm sorry, Ethan, that was insensitive," she apologized, mentally kicking herself. Gail of all people should know how hard it was not to have a photo of your loved ones. She still owed Jason for having torn up her photo, and though everything had worked out in the end, she would never forget how painful that had been. But then, she had an idea.
"Tell us about Karen and your son," she said to Ethan, and he described his family and talked about their lives on Earth before he'd been shot.
Gail looked at Castiel, squeezing his hand. He gave her a brief nod. In one of those moments of non-verbal communication they had, they realized that something had to be done for Ethan.
But first, Cas had an offer for him: "There's an opening for the head of Law Enforcement," Cas said, with just the right amount of irony. "How would you like to fill it, Ethan?"
Gail was dismayed. "Do we really need that kind of thing?" she asked sadly. It was unsettling to think that Heaven might need what basically amounted to a police force.
"What do you think, Ethan?" Castiel asked the young Angel.
Ethan frowned. "Unfortunately, I think we might," he said slowly. "Look at guys like Lanister. Or Metatron. Or Jason, for that matter." He leaned forward earnestly. "But it wouldn't be like Jason's, I swear. No torture. No police brutality. I don't believe in that crap. And the only Angels that would be in prison would be the ones that really deserve to be there, like Lanister. You were right to lock that guy up, Cas. You wouldn't believe the threats he was making about Gail when I took him there this morning."
Castiel's look was dark. Unfortunately, he would. He still wasn't entirely convinced that he should have relented and allowed Lanister to live. But at least he was locked up now, and the prison's sigils would prevent him from communicating with Jason or anyone else on Angel Radio.
Which reminded him of the next item on his mental checklist, and now he had just added one more. He was certainly packing a lot into his day, Castiel thought. It was a good thing he didn't need to sleep, though he still had miles to go, he thought, paraphrasing.
Cas turned to Gail. "I'd like to borrow Ethan for a bit," he said lightly. "Is there anything you can do on your own, for a few minutes?"
There he went, being mysterious again. He was trying to get rid of her, but he had the knack of asking so nicely that it was scarcely noticeable. She thought for a moment. Becky, or Chuck? She supposed she should follow the unselfish example Cas was setting for her, today.
"I think I'll pop in and see Becky," she told Cas. "I'll thank her for both of us for her support."
"Good idea," Cas said, and kissed her on the forehead. "Give her that from me."
Both men stood when she rose from the couch, and they continued to stand there, looking at her. Oh. Apparently, she was expected to leave, now. Okie-dokie; she'd cooperate. She certainly owed Castiel big for what had happened the last time he had been so evasive with her. She'd gotten her brother back.
So Gail popped out of Ethan's apartment to see Becky, and then Castiel and Ethan popped out of there and went to the prison, after Cas told Ethan what he had in mind.
Castiel had asked Ethan if he could visit the three Angels who had received lengthy prison terms at the hands of Xavier and the board, under the tribunal process. Having been through his own, he wanted to talk with these men, and hear of their experiences. He was on a roll, and if there had been injustices in their cases, which he strongly suspected now that there had been, they needed to be addressed.
Ethan was becoming more and more impressed with Castiel the more time he spent in his company. Castiel was God right now, yet he had called Ethan, asking if he and Gail could drop by Ethan's home. Then he had asked Ethan about his family and his life on Earth, and he had listened patiently to Ethan's answers. Now he had requested that Ethan take him to the prison to see those guys, and he had asked Ethan for his opinion on the prisoners. Ethan knew that Castiel could do whatever he wanted right now; as God, he didn't need anyone's permission or input to do whatever he saw fit. But he talked to Ethan like a person, an equal, even, and Ethan appreciated it.
Castiel talked to each prisoner individually in his cell, with Ethan present for each conversation. All three Angels had stories to tell which sounded all too familiar; Xavier, pushing through evidence they had not been permitted to look at or answer to, witnesses they had not been allowed to question, allegations and insinuations without any proof, in many instances. None of their alleged wrongdoings had even come close to the things that Castiel had done, yet the board had voted to send them to prison with no hope for parole. And they were the fortunate ones; two Angels had been put to death within the same time frame, as Castiel himself had been. Regrettably, there was nothing he could do for those Angels now. He had Godlike powers today, but Castiel was not God, nor was Bobby, technically; neither had the power to bring back life, although only he, Bobby, and Gail knew that little fact. Only his original Father had that power, along with Crowley, and presumably Metatron, although hopefully God had caught up with him by now. After today, Castiel would unfortunately have to contact Crowley about Metatron, but he would not think about that now and spoil the most wonderful day he had been having. Well, except for those first two days and nights in Las Vegas, that was.
After talking with the prisoners and looking into their hearts and minds, Castiel authorized each Angel's release. Each man fell to his knees and wept in gratitude, making Cas feel uncomfortable but leaving a lump in his throat. He asked them to please rise, then go home to their families.
Ethan had a lump in his throat too, and his eyes were threatening to tear up. He still didn't know how Cas was standing here right now, but Ethan was so glad he was. He vowed right there and then that if Castiel ever needed him, he would be there, no matter what.
Becky jumped up from her chair, and gave Gail a hug. "Where's Castiel?" she asked, looking around.
Gail smiled. "We're not joined at the hip, you know." She drew up a chair and sat down next to Becky. "OK, I guess we kind of are, sometimes," Gail acknowledged aloud, "but he's God today, and he's got a lot he wants to accomplish."
Becky looked at Gail with wide eyes. Kevin had mentioned that to her this morning, but she could scarcely believe it. "So, he's really God?" she asked her friend.
"Yep," Gail replied. "And he asked me to give you this." She leaned forward and kissed Becky on the forehead.
Becky smiled. That was so sweet, she thought. She bet Aurielle would have liked that. But thinking about Aurielle made her frown. Kevin and Chuck had told Becky that Aurielle and Jason were missing, and Becky was uneasy about that. She'd been in denial about her other girlfriend, but Becky now had to face the fact that Aurielle was not who she'd thought she was. To just take off from Heaven that way, and with that horrible Jason?
"What's the matter, Becky?" Gail saw the girl frowning, and Becky said, "I'm really sorry, Gail. I thought Aurielle was nice."
Aurielle? Gail thought. That name, again? "Where did that come from?" she asked Becky quietly.
"I don't know, Gail, I was just thinking about her and Jason leaving Heaven that way. I'm sorry I was even her friend." And Becky was now extremely sorry that she had confided in Aurielle about her feelings for Sam. Hopefully she wouldn't tell anybody. But that thought gave Becky an idea. Castiel was God today, and Gail was here, now. Becky would never have a better opportunity.
"Can I ask you something?" she said to Gail. "I wonder if Castiel could do me a little favour."
"What's that, Becky?" Gail asked curiously.
Becky paused. She had to proceed carefully, here. "I wonder if he could send me down to Earth, to work there," she said eagerly. "I miss Earth, and I could be a big help to you guys."
Gail was amused. Only Becky could call what she was asking a "little favour". And just what did she think she was going to do on Earth, anyway? But Gail didn't want to hurt her friend's feelings, so instead she asked, "Why would you want to go to Earth, Becky?"
"I could help you with Aurielle," Becky said. She may not have been a Mensa member, but Becky was intuitive, and she had the feeling now that these were the right words to say to Gail. "Maybe I could talk to her, convince her to give herself up."
She had Gail's attention now, and though what Becky was saying was interesting, it would definitely bear some discussion. "I'll talk to Castiel," she said to Becky noncommittally. "We'll get back to you."
To Becky, that was as good as a yes. If Gail talked to Castiel on her behalf, she could pack her metaphorical bags right now. Becky knew there was no way Castiel would say no to Gail, no matter what she asked for.
Gail was regarding Becky now, wondering how to bring up the subject of Kevin. She'd promised him she would, but now that she was here, she didn't know what to say. Was it any of her business, anyway?
"How are Sam and Dean?" Becky asked suddenly. The question wasn't sudden for Becky, though; she'd been biding her time, waiting to bring it up.
"They're fine," Gail smiled. "We had breakfast with them this morning. Well, I did, anyway." When Becky looked at her, puzzled, she told Becky about her gift from Cas. Should she tell Becky about the other gifts? Gail thought not. Becky didn't know anything about her brother, and the status of the Winchesters' bank account was their own business. But she did tell Becky about her and Sam having made breakfast, and Bobby and Dean cleaning up, afterwards. "You haven't truly lived until you've seen God roll up his sleeves and do dishes," Gail joked.
Becky giggled at the image. She was glad that Bobby was back. He'd been so good to her. And Becky was so happy that Castiel was alive, and that he and Gail were back together. Becky had stayed away from the viewing room, but Kevin had told her how heartbroken Gail had been that day, and Becky could only imagine. She had tried to visualize herself sitting next to Sam's dead body and holding his hand, and Becky couldn't do it. She would have gone crazy, too.
But she could definitely picture herself as a part of the scene that Gail was describing now. Becky and Sam in domestic bliss, making breakfast for everyone. Sam holding her hand at the table, Becky kissing him on the cheek, and...who knew? Maybe they could even do more than that. She thought about Castiel and Gail, and how romantic they were with each other.
"How does it feel, kissing God?" Becky blurted out.
Gail looked at her, startled, and then she started to laugh. She'd forgotten about Becky's tendency to just say whatever came to her mind. It was kind of refreshing, in a way.
"You know what?" she said mischievously. "It's sort of - oh, I don't know - divine."
Gail had amused herself with that one, but Becky just looked at her. Oh well, you couldn't win them all. But that had given her the opening she'd been looking for.
"Speaking of kissing, how are things going with you and Kevin?" Gail asked Becky.
"Oh, we don't do that," Becky assured her. "I let him hold my hand sometimes, but that's it." She frowned. She didn't want Gail running to Sam, telling him that she and Kevin were together. Becky had sold herself on the scene she was picturing in the bunker, and she was back in the land of fantasy now.
Gail frowned, too. Not exactly a ringing endorsement of her supposed relationship with Kevin, was it? And Becky had a faraway look about her now, like she was picturing something or someone else. Just as Kevin had said. But again, was this any of Gail's business, really? Wasn't the status of their relationship between Kevin and Becky?
So she said nothing further on the subject, but Gail hoped that Kevin wasn't due for a heartache. At least he had his mother back now. That had been a really sweet moment. Kevin and Linda's reunion had reminded her of herself and Frank's, earlier today. Castiel had done so many good things for so many individuals today, she thought warmly.
But he wasn't thinking warm thoughts right now; in fact, it was quite the opposite.
Castiel was standing in Lanister's prison cell, facing him. He'd asked Ethan to bring him here, then to leave them alone to talk. It had been bothering him that Lanister had apparently still been issuing threats against Gail while he had been led here, and even though he felt that there was nothing concrete that Lanister could do to her, Castiel wanted to warn the former board member that he would not tolerate it.
He had had Ethan take him somewhere else before he'd come here, too. They had gone to the weapons room and Castiel had taken back his confiscated blade, and Gail's as well, and he had them in his pockets now. They'd been tagged, but he could have picked them out just by the markings on them, anyway. As Sam and Dean had speculated, each Angel blade had its own individual markings, designating who the weapon's owner was. That was about the extent of Cas's knowledge on the subject; he would find out much, much more later, and under very strange circumstances.
Castiel was itching to take his blade out now and show it to Lanister. Did he think he could just stand there and threaten Gail with Jason?
"What, Castiel?" Lanister spat out. "Do you have a problem with what I have been saying?"
"You'll be the one with the problem, if you don't stop," Cas said coolly.
Lanister laughed derisively. "You never should have shown me mercy, Castiel. I still have friends in Heaven who will be only too glad to contact Jason on my behalf. He will do what should have been done to your female after the tribunal, and he will enjoy it. She should never have convinced you to let me live."
Now Castiel did have his blade in his hand, and it was at Lanister's throat. "You don't see her here now, do you?" he said in his quiet voice.
Lanister was a little frightened by the look in Castiel's eyes, but he remained defiant. "You won't do it," he said to Castiel.
"Really?" Castiel said, smiling coldly. "Care to test me?"
"The humans have made you weak," Lanister sneered. "After Jason is finished with her, he will go after them, and then you will have nothing."
Castiel eased up a little, thinking about what Lanister was saying. He was probably right. As long as Jason was out there somewhere, these things would very likely come to pass. He needed to go after Jason, first.
Lanister smiled, seeing the stricken look on Castiel's face. He was almost glad that Castiel had somehow survived his execution; seeing him suffer, having to watch his loved ones tortured and killed by Jason, would be far sweeter.
"I will have my vengeance," he said to Castiel. "I will instruct Jason to be highly creative in his torture of the Angel Gail. So, you see, I do know her name." He smirked.
Castiel cut Lanister's throat with the blade, then stabbed him in the chest, just for good measure. Lanister's body fell to the floor, and Castiel stood over it, breathing heavily, the blood pounding in his ears. The human part of him wished Lanister was still alive, so he could do it all over again. He kicked the body, hard. Lanister should have kept his mouth shut. Well, he wouldn't be telling Jason anything now, would he?
Then he stepped back, looking at Lanister's blood dripping from his blade. What had he just done? But he'd had to do it. Lanister was a menace, and he had been determined to see the three people that Castiel loved the most die.
"Ethan!" Castiel called out. "I need you here."
Ethan came to the cell and looked down at Lanister's body, then back up at Castiel in shock. "What happened?" he asked Cas. "What did you do?"
Castiel saw the look on Ethan's face, and he knew that Ethan was disappointed in him. Was Cas a cold-blooded killer after all, as Xavier had been alleging? Castiel knew that Ethan could never understand how angry and scared he'd felt when Lanister had mentioned Gail by name, talking about her torture at Jason's hands. He'd done what he had to do. What he should have done in the first place.
He pointed down at Lanister's body. "He took Gail's blade out of my pocket, and went for me. I had no choice." Gail's blade lay by the body, where Castiel had placed it, prior to calling for Ethan.
Silence. Ethan eyed Castiel curiously. An Angel who couldn't use his powers shows a blade to God, and God has to defend himself by killing him? Did Cas really expect him to believe that?
Cas did. He was starting to hate himself, but he still felt justified in having killed Lanister. But he was giving Ethan the choice, now: Whose side was the young Angel really on?
"I shouldn't have left you alone with him," Ethan said slowly.
"No, you probably shouldn't have," Castiel said calmly, quietly.
Ethan sighed. He still believed Castiel was a good guy, and he had pledged his loyalty to him.
So they carried Lanister's body out of the cell, and disposed of it. No one had seen Ethan bring Lanister in this morning, so no one would know he was gone now.
Then, Castiel left the prison to meet up with Gail. His expression had transformed when he mentioned her to Ethan, and Cas smiled warmly as he told Ethan he had a couple of surprises lined up for her this afternoon. Who was this guy? Ethan thought, and he was more than a little disturbed. He stared after Castiel a long time after he disappeared from view.
So now, both Castiel and Gail had a secret they were hiding from each other.
As he entered Becky's cubicle and stood behind Gail, Castiel's hands started to shake, and he put them in his pockets so Gail couldn't see. She'd turned around in her chair when he'd greeted Becky, and she was smiling at him, but Cas struggled to return Gail's smile. He'd just perpetrated the very murder she'd asked him not to, and he had lied to Ethan about the circumstances, though he had the feeling that Ethan hadn't quite believed him. Nevertheless, the young guard had helped him to cover it up. Castiel stubbornly told himself that ridding Heaven of an Angel like Lanister was the right thing to do, but he hadn't done it for Heaven, had he? He'd done it for himself. And he was supposed to be God. Was he letting the power go to his head again, thinking his needs outweighed what was right?
Gail looked at Cas curiously. He had a strange look on his face she couldn't quite identify. Where had he been, and why did he look so unhappy while trying to smile?
"Are you OK, Cas?" she asked him, concerned.
Cas shook it off. There was still quite a bit that he wanted to do today, and it was all positive. They deserved a good day together after all the tension they'd been through lately, and he was determined that they should have it. So he took his hands out of his pockets and put them on Gail's shoulders.
"Just fine," he told her, but then he picked up on what Becky was thinking, and Cas faltered again. Becky was looking at the two of them and smiling, but she was envisioning herself and Sam, having a very intimate moment. Cas was nonplussed. Wasn't Becky Kevin's girlfriend? Then he remembered Bobby having told them that Becky had committed suicide, and Sam had been upset about that. Understandably so, but Cas now wondered if there was more to the story than he knew. He looked at Becky curiously.
Oh, crap, Becky thought, Castiel's God today! He could read her thoughts, couldn't he? She started thinking about Kevin as hard as she could, and she saw Castiel blink, then look away.
That had been strange, Cas thought, but his mind had already shifted. Quite frankly, he had bigger things on his plate right now than Becky and her harmless fantasies. Castiel needed to put what he had just done out of his mind, and think of what he still wanted to accomplish today. He could deal with his guilt tomorrow. "Let's go, Gail." He forced himself to sound brisk; cheerful. "We've got more good deeds to perform."
As Gail rose and took his hand, she missed Cas's quick rearrangement of his facial expression. She normally would have caught it, but Gail was preoccupied with her own secret, at the moment: the vision she'd had of Aurielle. She supposed she would have to bring it up to Castiel at some point, but she wasn't going to do it today, not when today had been so happy and positive. Although he had looked and sounded a bit strange when he'd first shown up here.
They said goodbye to Becky and joined hands, appearing on a street corner in Philadelphia a moment later.
"Where are we?" Gail asked Cas. He pointed to the apartment building they were standing in front of, telling her that this was the place where Ethan had lived.
"This will be tricky," he told her. "I wanted to talk to Karen. Reassure her that Ethan is fine, and that he is a hero in Heaven." Especially now, Cas thought, but did not say. There was that stab of guilt again. He had wanted to do this for the young guard ever since Ethan had confided in Castiel, when he'd been an inmate. Ethan was worried about how Karen would be coping with his death. She'd been wavering in her faith since before Ethan had gotten shot, and he feared that his death would cause her to give up on God.
Castiel told Gail this now. He wanted to make sure that Karen knew that she and Ethan could be reunited in Heaven if she did not give up, but: "I can hardly just knock on her door and tell her I'm God and you're an Angel," he said, his mouth twitching with amusement. "Do you have any suggestions?"
Gail thought for a moment. She thought that it was a wonderful thing that he was proposing to do for Ethan and his girlfriend, but he had a point. How could they go about it? Then she had an idea.
"Do you think it would be OK if we were a little dishonest?" Gail asked him, smiling.
Her question was an innocent lead-in to her idea, but Cas felt another stab of guilt. He would really have to tell her what he had done soon, before his guilt ate him alive. And he would have to have a talk with Ethan, as well. It was all very well and good to help ease the young guard's mind as far as Karen was concerned, but Cas couldn't live with himself if he allowed the lie he had told Ethan to stand. That had been the old Castiel in Lanister's prison cell, and that was not who he was any more.
But for now, he looked at Gail and said, "What do you have in mind?"
They knocked on the door of the apartment, and when Karen opened the door, Gail smiled at her. "Hi," she said pleasantly. "I wonder if you could do us a favour. We used to live here a few years ago, and we're visiting the old neighbourhood. Do you think we could take a look around the apartment for a minute, just for old times' sake?" She took Cas's hand and smiled at him, then looked back at Karen. "It would mean a lot to us," Gail added.
Karen looked at the couple, appraising them. They looked like pleasant enough people, and she thought it was sweet that they were holding hands. She and Ethan used to do that a lot, Karen thought sadly.
"Sure, I guess so," she told them, opening the door to let them in. But she left the door open. Karen's boyfriend had been a cop, and she wasn't born yesterday.
As Cas passed Karen, he reached out and touched her forehead, using the Godly powers he had been given to calm her, and make her receptive to his message. Then he spoke to Ethan's common-law wife gently, reassuring her that Ethan was doing very well in Heaven, that he was thinking about her, and that one day, they would be together again.
Tears began to stream down Karen's face, but she was smiling. Castiel reached up to touch her forehead again, but Gail put her hand on his arm. "Just a minute," she said. He looked at her inquiringly.
"Can you conjure me up a camera?" she asked Cas. "I think I owe Ethan a present."
Castiel was puzzled for a moment, but then he realized what she was getting at, and he smiled. An instant later, there was a camera in Gail's hand.
Cas walked over to the playpen in the living room and picked up Ethan and Karen's infant son. The baby gurgled happily and reached out his tiny hand to touch Cas's nose, and Cas laughed. How he wished this child would be able to tell his schoolmates when he grew older that he had once bopped God on the nose. Hopefully, Ethan's son would grow up to be an honourable man, like his father. Yes, he and Ethan would have to have that talk, very soon.
Castiel put the baby in Karen's arms and Gail snapped the picture. Then she took a couple more, just to be sure, then a few of the apartment, just for good measure.
"How are you going to get the photos to Ethan?" Cas asked curiously.
"Digital camera," Gail told him. "Bobby's reinstated the computers in Heaven, right?"
Cas could have smacked himself in the head. Of course. He smiled. "That was a nice touch," he told her.
"Well, I felt bad about my tactless remark when we were at his place. Besides, I know first-hand how a picture of your loved ones can lift your spirits." Gail smiled sadly, thinking of the photo of her and Cas in Las Vegas which had meant so much to her, but which Jason had destroyed. But, she guessed it was time to let that go. She had the real thing back now, thank God.
She handed Castiel the camera and he put it in his pocket. He felt the Angel blades there, and there was another stab of guilt as the irony of the combination hit him. His own blade was clean now, but his conscience was not. Castiel now felt like there was a dark spot on his soul. The camera symbolized who he wanted to be, but the blade had felt right in his hand, and he had to admit that a very large part of him had missed that feeling.
But now was not the time for soul-searching. There would be plenty of time for that tomorrow, after he had to face Gail and confess to her what he'd done earlier today. He'd probably have some time alone after that when she stormed out on him, Cas thought ruefully.
He put his hand on Karen's forehead again, and she came out of the trance. Castiel had suggested to her that she had picked up the baby during their visit, so Karen was not surprised to be holding him.
"Thank you for letting us have a look around," Gail said to Karen, and Castiel offered his hand to Karen. She shook it briefly as he said, "Yes, thank you." Cas put his hand on the baby's head for a moment and murmured, "You will one day make your father proud."
Karen looked at him, startled. Had she heard him correctly?
The couple left, and when they were gone, Karen cuddled the baby, thinking of Ethan. But she was smiling now, not crying. She looked forward to being with Ethan again one day, in the future.
Gail handed the camera to Ethan. "Thank goodness you're young. I won't have to explain to you how to use this."
He looked at her curiously. "What's this? I mean, I know what it is," he hastily amended. "But, what's this all about?"
"Karen and your son are doing just fine," Castiel told him. "And now she knows that you are, as well."
Ethan looked at him, then at the camera.
"Pictures of your family, and of your apartment," Gail told him. Then, she grinned. "You may want to rearrange some furniture, but other than that, it's pretty bang-on." She looked around his Heavenly home, and marvelled: it was almost an exact reproduction of the apartment she and Cas had just been in. Wow.
Ethan grabbed Gail and brought her in for a hug. "Thank you," he said, his voice breaking with emotion.
Gail returned his hug, but then she came out of it, saying, "Don't thank me, thank Cas. Going there and reassuring Karen was his idea."
Ethan looked at Cas. He didn't exactly approve of what Castiel had done in Lanister's cell, but how could Ethan comdemn him if he was going to go and do something like what he had just done?
He reached out to shake Cas's hand, but Cas pulled him into a half-hug. "I have to talk to you about what happened," Cas said softly. "I'll be back in a minute."
Then he stepped back and took Gail's hand, and they winked out of Ethan's apartment.
They appeared just outside the bunker, and Gail was surprised. She was fully capable of getting around on her own now in the Angel way, but it was Cas's day today, and she was just going with the flow. It was kind of fun just to take his hand and see where he would take them next.
"What are we doing back here?" Gail asked him. Not that she minded in the slightest, but she'd thought they wouldn't see the guys again, today.
"I have a couple more things I need to take care of," Cas told her, his face serious. "I thought you might like to have lunch with Frank, in the meantime."
He was ditching her again. Gail shrugged. Oh well, at least she'd get to spend a bit more time with her brother, today. Brothers, plural, she thought, smiling.
"Aren't you coming in for a minute?" she asked him. "I know you've got a lot to do today, but..." Gail didn't know why she wanted him to come in; she just did. Maybe she just wanted Frank to see them together, to get him used to the idea. The last time she and her brother had been together on Earth, it had been just the two of them. Now, things were quite different. They'd have to talk about that tomorrow, too.
Cas hadn't intended to, but one look at her face, and he relented. Crowley and Jason were right; she was his soft spot. That wasn't necessarily a bad thing, he thought. After what had happened in Lanister's cell, Castiel had realized that he needed her to keep him in check, smooth out the rough edges. He'd gone off the reservation quite a few times in the past, and Cas didn't want to do that again. He was supposed to be better than that.
So they entered the door of the bunker and walked down the stairs. Sam looked at them in surprise. "What's with the human-type entrance?" he asked them, grinning.
"Variety is the spice of life," Cas said lightly, smiling.
Gail looked at the men, and then at the table. There were quite a few empty beer bottles on it, and the three humans were looking a little the worse for wear. Maybe she had gotten here just in time.
Bobby rose from the table. "Gotta take a whiz," he announced. He scowled at Cas. "Again."
Cas kept his face impassive, but he was smiling inwardly. Gail gave him a sidelong glance. "That's funny, I haven't had to - " she began to say, then stopped. Ohhh.
"I knew it!" Bobby exclaimed. "Just wait till tomorrow, Cas. You're gonna get yours."
Cas and Gail looked at each other and burst out laughing. "Sorry, Bobby," Cas said, trying his best to look sheepish.
"No, you're not," Bobby grumbled, and left the room.
"No, I'm not," Cas said, still smiling.
He and Gail turned to look at Frank and the Winchesters. They'd picked up on the thread, and they were all grinning. Or maybe the grins stemmed from the considerable amount of beer they'd drunk.
"I'm here for lunch," Gail announced. "When Bobby gets back, we'll have to have something to eat before things get totally out of hand."
"Come on, Gail, don't be such an Angel," Frank teased her. "Let your hair down, a little."
Dean smirked. "Yeah, have a glass of wine, or something. Sammy, get that pitcher of water out of the fridge. Let's see Cas in action."
Cas's mouth twitched. He got the inference. "I actually could do that," he said to Dean, "but Gail's just here for a short visit. I'm leaving her in your care until after lunch." Or in Bobby's care, at least, Cas thought with some amusement, as their Angel friend was the only sober one here, at the moment.
"But I will do something to help," Cas continued. He waved his hand over the table and the empty bottles disappeared and were replaced by an array of food, plates, and utensils.
Frank was impressed. Truthfully, he'd been getting very hungry. He hadn't eaten in a long time. He immediately started to load up a plate, looking at Cas. "Thanks," he said, smiling. "Hey, can you do this sort of thing all the time, or just today?"
"Regrettably, just today," Cas answered him, smiling back.
"Damn," Frank said, and they laughed.
Dean was loading up a plate too, but he had to give Cas a hard time, of course. "Way to go, Captain Buzzkill," Dean grumbled in Cas's general direction.
Cas was puzzled for a moment, but then he got it, just as Gail and Sam were opening their mouths to explain. "Oh," he said, appearing to consider. "Well, all right, then." He waved his arm in the air, but nothing happened; at least, nothing that any of the others in the room could see.
"What was that about?" Dean asked him.
"One of your spare rooms now has a fully stocked bar," Cas told him. He looked at Gail and rolled his eyes. "Lord help us," he said to her. Gail laughed.
Bobby came back into the room and looked at the lunch spread, pleasantly surprised. "Thanks, Cas," he said. "I guess you're forgiven. Until I have to go, again."
Cas smiled at him. "Can I ask you a question before I go, Bobby?" His face turned serious.
Bobby had grabbed a plate, and he paused before starting to load up. "Sure, Cas, what is it?"
Cas hesitated for a moment, but he forged ahead. He really needed to make sure. "You're OK with gay people ascending into Heaven, aren't you?"
Bobby was a little taken aback. What a strange thing to ask. "Of course, Cas. Why would you even ask me that?"
Cas smiled again, relieved. Why, indeed. "I don't know, Bobby. I just wanted to make sure."
Bobby frowned. "I'm not Xavier, I'm me. I don't give a damn what anybody does in the bedroom. You oughta know that, Cas." He looked at his friend pointedly.
Point taken, Cas thought. Bobby had arranged for him and Gail to share a hotel room in Las Vegas, and had defended them to the board, saying that what had happened there was no one's business. And Bobby was thinking the same thing right now about himself and Rowena. But Cas didn't think they could ever agree about that. That was a different situation, entirely. But he was not going to enter into that debate, at least, not right now. He nodded to Bobby, acknowledging his comment.
Then Cas walked over to Gail. She was taking a seat beside Frank, getting ready to dig in. She looked up at him. "So, I'll see you in a bit?" Gail asked him.
"Yes, you will," he said, and leaned down to kiss her on the cheek. Then he clapped Frank on the shoulder. "It's good to see the two of you together," Cas said, and Frank smiled. If Cas was trying to ingratiate himself, he was sure going about it the right way.
"Thanks, Cas," Dean said around a mouthful of food, and Gail rolled her eyes at him. At least he'd said thank you, this time. But couldn't he ever just swallow before he spoke?
Cas waved Dean off. "It was nothing," he said, pleased to help.
"No, I meant for the bar," Dean smirked. "We still have the rest of the day, and once Gail leaves, we're gonna kick it up a notch."
"I'll be sure to put all the lights on and make a lot of noise when I come in tomorrow, then," Gail teased. She looked at Sam and they exchanged a smile, both of them thinking of the morning they had roused a very hung-over Dean and Cas, in Las Vegas.
Apparently Dean was thinking of that, too; he threw Gail a suspicious look, and then went back to his food.
Gail put a hand on Frank's arm. "Just one of the many stories I'll have to tell you tomorrow," she said to her brother, smiling.
Frank was intrigued. He was glad she'd said that, though. He realized that his sister had a whole history with these guys that he knew nothing about. And while he was glad for her, he'd been wondering how he would fit in here, or if he even did. Obviously, their lives couldn't go on as they had before. He knew Gail was glad to have him back, but she had outgrown him. She had been busy making friends and having adventures, and he had been stuck in Hell. And he needed to do some serious atoning for what he'd done in Crowley's service. They'd have to talk about that, too. He might tease Gail about being an Angel, but the fact remained that she was, and so was her boyfriend, who she obviously doted on. Frank hoped she'd be able to handle what he had to tell her.
Castiel was watching them all eat together, bantering back and forth. He was feeling a bit left out, but it was his own fault, really. He could have given himself the gift, and partaken with them. But, it was just as well. He'd have been tempted to stay here all day with his family and then, before he knew it, his day would be over, and he would be filled with more regret. He'd only get the one chance at being God, and after the stunt he'd pulled this morning, he knew he had not been worthy of his Father's gift. Nevertheless, it had not been taken from him, so he would continue. But he had to talk to Ethan, and it had to be now.
So he said his goodbyes, and winked himself back to Ethan's apartment.
"I'm so sorry, Ethan, I never should have put you in that position."
Cas was sitting on Ethan's couch, leaning forward with his hands between his knees and looking at Ethan earnestly. He'd confessed the true circumstances of Lanister's death to the young Angel, and even though Ethan had been shocked, he was silent long enough for Cas to explain why he'd done what he'd done. Cas had explained that his planting of Gail's blade had been a knee-jerk reaction and, truth be told, so had Lanister's murder. He had killed Lanister out of anger and fear, and while he could not truthfully say he was sorry that the former board member was dead, Castiel had needed to come clean.
"Have you told Gail about this?" Ethan asked him. In the interests of full disclosure, Castiel had shared the details of his meeting with the board, specifically his original ruling on Lanister, and Gail's argument against it. Ethan thought she'd been right, but he hadn't said so aloud.
Castiel's gaze shifted away from Ethan. "Not yet," he said uncomfortably.
Ethan sighed. This was not going to go over very well, he knew. It didn't particularly go over very well with Ethan, either, but he was trying to look at the big picture, here. Cas was a good guy, and he had done a lot of good things today for his friends in Heaven. And Ethan was sure there had been other good deeds he wasn't privy to. Cas had had a very humanlike moment of weakness, but after all, it wasn't as if Lanister had been a decent man. Far from it, in fact. Cas told Ethan that it had been Lanister who had ordered that Gail be forced to watch Castiel's execution. And Lanister had been threatening to send Jason after Gail, and Ethan knew he would have followed through on his threats. Ethan could feel sympathy for Lanister over the death of his son, but Cas had explained the circumstances behind that too, and Ethan understood that Cas and Gail felt they'd had no choice but to kill those Angels. Cas had also talked about the two bailiffs he'd killed in the hearing room. Their deaths had been another knee-jerk reaction. Cas had just been sentenced to death, and he had felt trapped, cornered. It was Jason who was really the menace here, and they would have to put their heads together and figure out how to deal with him.
"Can you ever forgive me?" Cas said to Ethan now.
Ethan considered for a moment, but he didn't have to think too long. "Yeah, Cas, I forgive you," he sighed, leaning back in his chair. "But next time, before anything happens, just call on me, and I'll help you."
Cas almost smiled. Ethan was being a good friend, but Castiel doubted that would work, if he had his blade in his hand at the time. But he might have to move in here with Ethan for a while, after he made his confession to Gail tomorrow. Though that thought didn't make him feel like smiling.
Once Castiel left Ethan's apartment, he knew what he wanted to do next.
When they had first visited Ethan, Castiel had told Gail about the residences in Heaven, and he'd joked about the fact that the two of them were homeless. But in reality, they were. He wanted her to have a real home, a place they could call their own.
So Castiel went back to Earth and put his Godly powers to work.