Chapter 3 - and now I know

R-P.O.V.

From the first time Nate said that word, my world has been spinning out of control. I actually thought his wild stories and accusations about Jon were part of a ruse. I was so sure it was all some sick joke or maybe he believed it. I could not, would not, entertain the thought that vampires were real until he punched a hole in a hard cover book with one finger. That's a sight I don't think I will ever forget.

Fear shook me when he spoke of us being just a byproduct of Joham's experiments. I have never seen a face convey so much anger or disgust, and I think he growled as well. Even with it not directed at me, I could not help but react, in sheer terror, it was an instinctual response and to think he is half human.

What it must but like to see a full . . . No, I don't want to think that word. That word I can't even say it in my mind, and he thinks that I would choose to become one. The idea of it is just wrong; I can't see myself drinking blood and killing people. How many lives are forfeited to sustain a, ugh that word, no matter how I try it just keeps coming back.

"Why? Why would I want that? I mean the whole living for fever would be alright, but the rest of it. . . I don't know what to say. I don't even know what the rest even is?" I am not even sure how or what I am trying to ask.

"I would only be willing to turn you if you cannot continue to live as a human. I am not sure if we can deliver the baby without it costing your life, that is the only reason I would even consider it." I try to think about what he is saying, but in my head, I just keep seeing me killing people like in the "lost boys." With these thoughts in my head I can't respond, I am just staring out the window into the night.

"Let me tell you about truth vampires, not what you think you know about them. . . I am not trying to persuade you to do something you don't want to do. I just think that you should know about the facts before you make up your mind."

I don't bother to look at him. I just nod my head so that he will get on with it.

N-P.O.V.

Pleased that Renée has managed to calm herself down, I think about the facts. I am not going to push her into something that she doesn't want.

As always I start from the beginning, how one becomes a vampire.

"Vampires are made when they bite, but do not kill a person. They are venomous like a snake, so as long as the person's heart is beating the venom spreads. Slowly changing them into to a vampire in three days time." I look over at her to see if she is still OK. Her heart is steady and her face is blank.

"According to Huilen, the pain of this transformation is indescribable. She can only compare it to being burned alive. I remember her screams, they will haunt me forever, and for almost three days straight she cried begging for death. I would never make this offer if there were another option. Once her heart stopped beating the pain left her and it only remained in her throat. That pain is what we call thirst. When a vampire wakes the thirst is the worst it will ever be. Spending them in to bloodlust, they are crazy with desire for blood. Huilen slaughtered a village before she knew what was happening." Her heart jumped and she looks over at me wide-eyed, she starts to talk but I cut her off.

"Just wait – I'm not done yet. Horrified by what she had done, she took me and ran deep into the jungle. When she stopped, sat leaning up against a tree for three more days, not moving at all. Vampires don't need to breathe, blink or shift their weight. They could stand in one spot forever if they wanted to and never be uncomfortable. When they stop they are still as a statue. I on the other hand was hungry and thirsty. I ate some plants and went to the riverbank to drink when a large alligator tried to attack me. Huilen jumped into the action, grabbing the beast. With her vampire strength she unknowingly ripped its head off. When the blood began to flow I drank from it. Huilen nor myself have never tasted human blood after that day." She is just staring at me in disbelief. So I press on, "We stayed deep in the jungle away from the humans for years, too fearful to get close enough to smell them and lose control. Eventually we met Zafrina, Kachiri and Senna, I'll tell you more about them later. They told us as long as we were not thirsty we would not lose control. So we moved closer to the humans still fearful that we would not be able to stop ourselves. Little by little we gained enough faith that we could interact with them hurting them. About fourteen years after my birth, we left the jungle and reentered the human world."

"Wow, do many others do that?"

"No, we have heard rumors that two other covens do the same, but we have never met them. We tend to keep to ourselves."

"Why? I mean it seems like you should be out spreading the word to others so they can live off animals too." Renee demanded.

"The few we have tried to get to live like us, don't like the taste of animal blood, and don't see any reason not to kill the humans. We have only met one who was willing to change his diet."

She looks a bit dumbfounded by that statement. I am not sure which part confuses her so I just clarify it all.

"You see, human blood is the equivalent to tasting a thousand times better than your favorite food. While animal blood is just something you can sustain yourself with. It's not particularly good tasting and it's not something you crave. As for not caring about human life that's debatable, I have been told that most vampires see human as prey and nothing more. Also Dermott, that Huilen's mate, says that human blood is an addiction. He took five years before he went near a human after he met Huilen. He was already changing his diet and hated killing humans before we met him." She nods once, thinking she understands the concept, but being human I know she can't.

"Why do you all keep to you selves', is it just because of the animal thing?"

I can't answer this without going into a lot of history. I'm not ready to talk about the fears I have for my family, my family that just keeps growing. Still, I have promised the truth and the answer I give just a watered down version of the truth.

"Then main reason is I am not a Vampire. I'm not as strong or as fast as a vampire. Therefore, defending myself would be hard and just like human's vampires fear the unknown. I am unknown, only five soon to be six hybrids are in existence."

I am hoping that we can get down to the facts now. I want to tell her more, but stay off the topic of the dangers of being a hybrid a little longer.

"So you are different because your mom was human. What other differences are there other than the speed on strength?"

"How about I tell you about Vampires then about hybrids." It has not escaped me that she has yet to say the word vampire; now that she knows that they are real. She just nods her head, looking stressed again.

"I am going to start at the top, they are smart. I'm sure you have heard that human only use a fraction of their brain, well vampires use it all. They can concentrate on multiple things at the same time and process information faster than the fastest computers in the world. Vampires also have extreme senses, vampire sight is perfectly clear to the point that they can see the dust in the air. Huilen sees much further and clearer than I do, even with my advanced vision. I can't accurately describe it because I have never seen by human eyes and Huilen having seen from both still says it's incomparable. Hearing is so clear that they can hear a spider move from anywhere in a house. Huilen makes us live miles from the road because she hates to hear the music in cars that drive past. Taste is another hard one to explain. Vampire's only want to taste one thing and that I describe to you already. Just breathing through their mouth they can't taste every thing around them. Touch is also enhanced a vampire can feel everything. They can feel every thread of what would be the smoothest of silk to a human. Smell the strongest of all the senses. If you were to smell a vampire with your human nose you would think they smell good, and they all do. However, when a vampire scents, another vampire they can break down the "good" smell into each aspect of it. Huilen smells like Hibiscus, Orange paper flowers and morning dew. If she traveled through the forest three days ago any vampire would be able to smell her and follow that scent. It's not just that they can smell each other that way; they smell every thing like that. They can smell things from miles away and it is so accurate that they can detect adrenaline in the blood of their prey."

"Wow, I can't even imagine living that," Renee says looking bewildered.

"I know that you can't that why I am trying to explain so that you are fully aware of the choice you have to make."

"OK, there is more right, I know you said they strong and fast."

"Yeah, that's a big understatement. An average vampire running at full speed would look like a quick blur that you may or may not notice. They are so strong that a Mack truck traveling sixty miles an hour could not move them." At that she let out a nervous laugh.

"So we're talking about stuff like Supper Man, 'faster than a speeding bullet, and able to leap small building in a single bound.'" While I was good to hear her giggle I need to keep her focused.

"Hard to believe but very true. Only the don't fly and Kryptonite can't hurt them, only another vampire clan. The only thing strong enough to hurt a vampire is a vampire. Vampire skin is harder than the strongest stone and nothing other vampire teeth can break it. Oh, and when I told you about sparkling like a disco ball I wasn't kidding. Imagine them covered in diamond dust, light is reflected off of them like a prism. That is one more thing that just hard to describe, until you see it."

"So that's why they don't go out in the sun, they can't because it would show us all how different they are."

"Yes, that is very true. Out in the wilderness, where there are no humans around Huilen and Dermott don't need to worry about it because we would hear them coming from literally miles away. When they travel into towns in the area they go at twilight and the sun is just low enough to not cause a scene. When we live amongst the humans we tend to stay north and in areas that generally cloudy." She looks sadden by that, I am sure that she is remembering her hometown that she had to get away from.

"Just a bit more and then we will have covered all the basics . . ."

R-P.O.V

Nate continued to tell me about them, never aging, never changing and being who they are from the moment they were changed. Likes, dislikes and personality traits are all as unchanging for them. Venom enhances beauty, heals all wounds and scars. They can never sleep or dream, and they never get tired. They can run at full speed for hours or even days if they wish. He also told me that they can't reproduce, they are not born, they are made, turned. Now the only way I may live is to be turned as well. Live, if that's you can even call it. Hidden away from the humans at first and then when I can control myself hiding within them never letting on to what I have become. He says it's my choice but what kind of choice do I really have. It seems to me I will die while giving or become a word I can even say out loud, Vampire.

And now I know it's not about choice but survival. Do you want to survive how can that even be a question. Who in their right mind would choose death, when you can live on?

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an: as always, please review and let me know what you are thinking. Also, I would really like a beta or proofreader. Let me know if you would like to help.

Disclaimer: Stephanie Meyer owns Twilight and the twilight characters, no copyright infringement intended.