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Kensi could and would never claim to be someone who was organized or kept a clean home. On any given day her apartment looked like it had been ransacked and then attacked with a leaf blower. But now it was even worse and looked like a library had exploded in it. There were so many books of different size and color that they formed leaning towards that threatened to fall at a seconds notice and had so many different colored sticky notes inside them that they could barely close properly.

Each book held a similar title, "Parenting for dummies", "How to handle adoptive children", "Foster children 101…" They had all been purchased shortly after Kensi had made up her mind about adopting the children, and some of them had even been recommended by her new social worker Jeffry McDowell who had instantly started filling her in on what the children were like and what she could expect from social services. He was currently in the process of setting up visitation for her to meet the children for herself.

He had promised her that he would try and get something set up for the next day which was something that both made her feel elated and terrified. To be honest, it was completely stressing her out, especially after Jeffry had stopped by the apartment and deemed it unfit for more than one person. He had then run through a list of things that the kids were going to need, a list that had to have been long enough to fill a small book or a large pamphlet.

It was all stuff she knew was important though and had jotted everything done for purchase when she got the chance to go shopping. The first thing she had to do though was find a house that was affordable and big enough for a family of four. So far she had looked through dozens of newspapers and gone onto online sites, but hadn't found anything she liked.

"This is impossible." She groaned and rubbed at her tired eyes before noticing the time and realizing that if she didn't get moving, she would be late for work.

OSP was fairly quiet when she got there, ten minutes late. Callen and Sam were standing off to the side talking about something while Deeks was at his computer typing away. He looked up when she entered and furrowed his brow at the dark circles under her eyes.

"Are you okay?" He asked when she sat down.

"Yeah, I'm fine." Kensi smiled at him and took a large gulp of the coffee that she had with her. "Why do you ask?"

"Well ever since the funeral, you've looked more haggard than anything else and you can't say it's the late nights working since you've gone home every night the past couple of days." Deeks pointed out.

"I just have a lot on my mind." Kensi shrugged and turned towards Hetty when she walked into the bullpen.

"Ms. Blye, can I have a word?" Hetty asked.

Deeks watched Kensi stand up and follow Hetty to her office, curiosity raging inside his mind until he gave in and stealthily got closer to the office without looking obvious.

"So tomorrow will be a big day." Hetty said in response to something Kensi must have mentioned.

"I'm going to have to get a new place, I've been looking around." Kensi said.

"Oh well of course you'll need a new place. Your apartment is a nice size for just you, but you're going to add onto your family soon." Hetty said, making Deeks's eyes widen and his heart feel like a vice grip had been placed around it.

"Yeah it's going to be a big change." Kensi sighed. "But it doesn't really feel like there is another option, I can't just not do this, you know?"

"I think I can understand. Have you told Mr. Deeks what is going on?" Hetty asked.

"No." Kensi slowly answered and groaned. "Hetty this is going to change everything you know that. No more late nights or taking unneeded risks. There might be days when I show up late or where I won't show up at all. I'm not sure how much use I'll be to the team either."

"You'll adjust." Hetty lightly promised.

Deeks saw her stand up and carefully made his way back to his desk, waiting for his partner to come back. When she did, it was only for her to look more tired than she had before. She gave him a small look and then sank down into her chair.

"Kens what's going on?" Deeks ventured to ask when she opened her computer.

Kensi thought about it for a moment and bit her bottom lip. "A lot is going on Deeks. I haven't really wrapped my head around it. All that I can focus on right now is the fact that I need a bigger house."

"How big do you need?" Deeks leaned back in his chair.

"At least three bedrooms and a nice yard," Kensi stated.

Deeks scrunched up his brow at that, thinking that she would say something along the lines of a smaller house than three bedrooms.

"I have a friend in real-estate…"

"Of course you do," Kensi cut him off with a light chuckle.

"That might have something that you would like." Deeks finished. "If you want I can call him and see if he'll meet with you."

Kensi smiled at him and nodded. "That would actually be great. I've been running into all kinds of dead ends when it comes to finding a nice house that I can actually afford."

"That's probably because you're picky." Deeks pointed out, his heart still feeling like a boa constrictor was coiling around it.

The thought of Kensi being pregnant by some guy she had taken home for a one night stand, was not sitting well with him. He wasn't fool enough to try and convince himself that his feelings for Kensi didn't run deeper than partners and friends. His feelings for her had been strong since they had first met but were securely cemented in his heart when they had gone undercover as a married couple and she had kissed him. Sure it had been a 'save our ass' type of kiss, but it had been enough.

"I'm not picky, I just need a place that is big enough for more than one person and that has a good yard, safe neighborhood, friendly neighbors, a safe park nearby and a great school system." Kensi rattled off and raised an eyebrow at his incredulous look.

"Yeah you're not picky at all." Deeks rolled his eyes. "And why do you need all that anyway?"

"Can you call your friend please and see if he has anything that fits those parameters?" Kensi asked.

Deeks grumbled something about keeping secrets but called his friend anyway and got a meeting set up for later that day. Kensi had smiled her thanks and they had gone back to work. It wasn't until later that afternoon that Kensi was able to get away and head out to her car. She stopped short though when she noticed that Deeks was following her.

"What are you doing?" She questioned.

"I'm coming with you." Deeks pointed out matter of fact.

"Uh, no you're not."

"Uh, yes I am." Deeks insisted. "Tanner is a friend of mine and will find you a better deal if I'm with you. So unless you want to be paying for this house for the rest of your life, it might be best to bring me along."

"Fine," She huffed and they got into the car.

She wasn't really sure what she had expected, but Tanner Green was nothing like she thought he would be. He was well dressed, well-mannered and an altogether nice guy. He had compiled a list of different houses that fit most if not all of her wants, and provided pictures of each before bringing her from house to house. It wasn't until they reached the third house that Kensi stopped short and just stared at it.

It was a simple two story house with plumb and gray siding. It had four bedrooms, 2.5 bathrooms and a two car garage. There was a small but useful yard attached that would be great for three young kids to play in and was in an amazing town with one of the best school systems California had to offer. It was perfect.

"I love it." Kensi declared and looked at Tanner who looked like Christmas had come early.

It wasn't exactly a cheap house and was one that would get him a great commission.

"I can start getting the papers together for it." He stated. "How soon would you need to be able to move in?"

"Within the next couple of days if possible," Kensi announced causing Deeks's eyes to widen in surprise.

"Okay are you going to tell me what is going on?" He asked when Tanner practically skipped away to his car. "You've been tired lately and stressed, now you're looking at buying a house suited for a decent size family…Kens, be honest with me here, are you pregnant?"

"Deeks, I would kind of need a social life and a boyfriend in order to be pregnant, don't you think?" Kensi asked, her arms crossed over her chest.

"Then what the hell is going on with you?" He mimicked her stance, getting a bit impatient with her avoiding the truth.

"Look Deeks, a lot is going on right now. I promise that I will tell you, just not right now okay?" Kensi sighed.

Deeks dropped his arms with a sigh of his own and rubbed a hand over his face. "Alright, I'll drop it for now but you will tell me?"

"Yes." Kensi promised and put a hand on his lower arm. "I just need a little more time."

Deeks nodded in time for Tanner to come back over with the paperwork. He ensured Kensi that she could move into the house in about 3 days' time and that everything would be ready to be signed off at that time. The partners thanked him and headed back to the car only for Kensi's phone to ring, Jeffry McDowell's name popping up on caller ID.

"I have to take this." Kensi said and stepped away before answering her phone.

"Ms. Blye, I have set up a time for you to meet the children tomorrow." Jeffry stated as a means of greeting.

"When will that be?" Kensi asked.

"The visitation has been set up so that you will be able to visit them every day between the hours of ten and twelve. You can spend all of the two hours with them or just a little bit, it depends on you and the children. We figured that they need to be able to get to know you a bit before we move them into the house with you. You have found a house right?" Jeffry rambled off.

"Yeah I just got one." Kensi nodded though she knew he couldn't see it. "I'll be able to move in soon and get everything ready."

"Excellent, I'll have to stop by to make sure that everything is safe and child friendly, but getting a house is a very good step towards finalizing everything." Jeffry said with a smile in his voice. "Your visitation with the children will take place at the police station where you met Heather Rice. We'll have a room set up for the four of you that will be comfortable."

"Okay, I'll be there." Kensi stated and glanced at Deeks who was watching her from the car.

"I'll meet you at the front of the station tomorrow morning then." Jeffry said. "Do you have any questions?"

"Not right now but if I do then I'll ask them tomorrow." Kensi stated.

They then said their goodbyes and she hung up and head to the car. Thankfully Deeks restrained himself from saying or asking anything and just smiled at her and said he'd see her later when she dropped him off at his apartment.

The next morning came faster than she had ever thought. Before she knew it, she was pulling into the parking lot of the police station and being greeted by a very happy looking Jeffry who had, just a few days ago, gushed about what a wonderful person she was for taking in a sibling group and how hard it was to place siblings together since many people just wanted one child or didn't want a particular child from a sibling group.

"William is a bit curious this morning about what is going on, while Elijah and Isla are more interested in the room that they are in." Jeffry explained. "They might be a bit challenging with you, especially William, since children like to test new adults in their lives to see what they can get away with and how much they can push. I don't want you to punish them or anything today, just let them push and tell them what you find acceptable and what you don't. They will get to learn you better if you let them test you. You'll also learn more about them that way."

"Okay." Kensi took a nervous breath and followed him through the station and to a room near the back where she could hear the babbling and talking of small children. She pushed open the door and the kids stopped talking and looked at her in curiosity and confusion. Kensi smiled at them all which seemed to put them at ease, and took a seat on the floor when Jeffry instructed her to.

Isla was the first one to approach her, which didn't surprise anyone. Small children tended to gravitate towards adults, especially women. Isla seemed to size her up while William kept a close watch over his sister in a way that clearly screamed, 'protective big brother' to Kensi.

"Hi William, Elijah and Isla," Kensi greeted with a bright smile that seemed to put Elijah and Isla at ease, while William still stood stock still, his sharp eyes watching her. "My name is Kensi."

"Hewow," Elijah greeted her with a finger in his mouth. "My name Ijah,"

"It's nice to meet you Elijah." Kensi reached out her hand which he took. "Would you like to sit with me?"

The three year old nodded his head and sat down which must have looked like a good idea to 2 year old Isla who promptly did the same, her big brown eyes focused intently on Kensi, who turned to look at William.

"William, would you like to sit with us?" She tentatively asked. He looked torn for a minute but then made his way over. "William, do you know what's going on, what's going to happen?"

"We're going to live with you." William said matter of fact.

"Yes, and do you know what?" Kensi asked seriously and got a shake of his head. "I'm going to need your help."

Williams eyes widened comically and in awe. "Me?" He asked.

"Yes you, you're a big boy and a super big brother." Kensi explained so that he would understand. "I'm going to need your help taking care of your little brother and sister. Do you think you can do that?"

"Yes." William said with an extremely serious look on his young face.

"Thank you." Kensi told him and let out a sigh of relief when he sank down next to her on the floor.

It was only then that she truly realized that this could work. It was going to be hard, she had no doubts about that, but she knew it was the best thing that she could do.

For the children, and for herself.

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