So, I am back from my holiday – which was awesome – and I am already hating Melbourne's freezing cold weather after one day. I'd like to thank you for all the feedback and favourites/alerts I received.

By the way, the parts in italics are in the past.

Enjoy!

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Chapter Three: April Kepner

People relate different colours to different feelings. Yellow is seen as happy and bright. Green is energetic and exuberant. Blue is for boys and pink is for girls. For everyone it is different; depending on who you are and what you've been through. Single moments can change your perspective on things in a flash.

She was walking through the storage room, unaware of her surroundings; concentrating on that tune she'd been humming for the past twenty-four hours, wondering where she had heard it. She thought to her patient in room 473, clutching his sheets tightly in his fists as another wave of pain and nausea shocked him. She thought of what Dr Bailey had told her to bring back, racking her brains to remember what it was and cursing that stupid song for distracting her.

Running through the conversation she'd just had with Bailey in her mind, she didn't realise what was about to happen until she had tripped over and the floor was coming ever so closer, throwing her hands out in front of her instinctively. A wet warmth covered her torso instantaneously and had very soon soaked through her pale blue scrubs.

'Who spills something and then doesn't clean it up?' she thought as she began to push herself up.

Looking down, her stomach dropped at the sight of her red-soaked scrubs. As she looked around, the stale smell of blood became recognizable, and she realising shockingly she was lying in a pool of blood. Suddenly realising she's tripped on something solid that was still under her foot, she glanced around to see Reed lying lifelessly, a gunshot wound clear on her forehead.

Stomach convulsing, she got up and ran.

April dry-reached over her breakfast cereal, as her mum spilt the tomato juice on the linoleum floor, the red liquid quickly covering the majority of the kitchen floor. Distinct flashes between the spilt tomato juice and then the pool of Reed's blood and then the tomato juice again set in the nausea again. Red was now a colour of pain, of despair, of death.

"So, honey, after today will you go back to your apartment?" her mum asked as she mopped up the mess.

"I don't know. I guess so," she replied blandly.

Pushing away her cereal bowl, her appetite gone completely, she walked down the hall to her mum's spare room, shutting the door behind her.

She turned the shower on full heat and stepped inside, letting the scalding water run over her, wishing it to relieve the numbness she constantly felt. Picking up her razor, she proceeded to shave her legs. She let out a little squeal as the blade nicked her skin, and mistakenly looked down quick enough to see a trickle of blood ran down her let. Tears sprang to her eyes as red took over her vision and she leant back against the shower wall, sliding to the floor. She sat there and cried for who knows how long and hardly heard the knocking at the door.

"April, honey, we have to leave in fifteen minutes. Are you alright in there?" her mum called over the running shower.

She barely called out, "okay. I'm fine," without her voice cracking.

Getting to her feet shakily, she turned off the shower and instantly felt cold when she could no longer feel the hot spray of the water.

Drying herself quickly and slipping on her black dress and jacket, she left the room, blinking back any other tears.

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The car park was quite full when they arrived and she recognised a few faces of colleagues at the hospital. The foyer was semi-full as people passed through into the church and she paused, stuck where she was, as the photo of Reed surrounded by flowers came into view.

The feeling of remorse and sorrow in the church was overwhelming. She hadn't really imagined Reed had had a life and friends outside of college and the hospital; numerous tear-tracked faces she did not recognise. She was only one of many who had loved and lost Reed, and surprisingly, knowing she was not alone in how she was feeling didn't make her feel any better.

Though she had only ever been to one funeral before, her Pop's when she was only ten, she thought the service was quite nice; well, as nice as a service could be.

Outside the church, she bumped into Derek.

"Oh, Chief Shepherd, sorry, I didn't see you there," she stuttered an apology.

"Dr Kepner, how are you doing?" he asked, a feeling of empathy about him.

"Don't call me doctor; just April," she said quietly.

"Okay, but only outside of the hospital," he joked, half-heartedly.

"No, just April. I can't be a doctor anymore, not after this," she admitted, nodding her head toward the church.

"Apri-"

"I'm sorry, Chief Shepherd. I'm resigning."

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Em xXxXxxx