Shooting things off the Presidium is not allowed.
"So, ready for our little date?" Garrus set up ten effigies of the Cerberus troops they have encountered, Assault Troopers, Centurions, Nemeses, Phantoms, Guardians, the works, on a protective rail.
"Involving weapons?" Shepard prepped up her M-8 Avenger assault rifle, "Hell yeah!" She and Garrus backed away from the rail until the intrinsic details of the effigies blurred into a shape vaguely resembling a human. Garrus aimed his sniper rifle at the first Assault Trooper effigy and pulled the trigger. The bullet struck the effigy and knocked it down to Goddess knows where, hopefully nowhere near hitting someone's head.
"Okay, amateur, my turn." Shepard stepped up to Garrus' former position and positioned her assault rifle to aim just below the Centurion effigy's head.
"Still mad I won that little bottle shooting contest?" Garrus nudged Shepard with his elbow.
"Shut up, Garrus." Shepard smirked. Oh, if only he knew the truth. She fired at her effigy. The impact of the bullet knocked it out of her line of sight.
"Alright, move aside." Garrus moved to face the Nemesis effigy, "this is how a professional does it."
"Professional?" Shepard raised her eyebrows, "Oh honey, even the amateurest of amateurs is laughing at you."
"Consider yourself lucky I'm your boyfriend," Garrus grunted from the sniper rifle's kickback after he fired at the Nemesis effigy. Wherever it ended up, it didn't end up hitting something since no one yelled at them.
For the next couple of minutes, Shepard and Garrus took their turns firing the rest of the Cerberus effigies off of the rail. The last of the effigies stood there, a Dragoon with its whips equipped.
"And this is for constantly targeting me and not anyone else!" Garrus fired at the Dragoon effigy, but ended up missing it entirely, its whips taunting him.
"Yeah, missing the shot entirely." Shepard moved to the front of where the effigy stood, "That'll teach 'em."
"Damn it!" Garrus scuffled off to the side. Shepard aimed her assault rifle at the Dragoon effigy and fired at it. The force of the bullet knocked the effigy clean off of the rail and out of her line of sight.
"I'm Commander Katrina Shepard, and this is officially my favorite spot on the Citadel," Shepard pointed at the rail.
"Hey, where'd all this shit come from?!" someone yelled from way below the rail.
"And we're out," Shepard walked away from the rail.
"Think anyone's gonna find out about our little contest?" Garrus asked as he joined her.
"Nah, they'll just blame someone else," Shepard answered, "like Zaeed."
"Really, Shepard?" Shepard's latest email message read, "You really thought we'd believe that Zaeed was the one who made that mess on the Presidium?"
"Well, it was worth a shot," Shepard said to herself. "If I blamed Wrex or Grunt, maybe they'd believe it."