Yes, I live. Can you believe that? I was seriously not going to update for a LONG time, but the review AnnAisu left kicked me into gear. I was actually mad at this stupid story after I had to write the second and third chapter three times after they all disappeared or were deleted for various reasons. I figured the story was cursed. But, oh well. I decided to take this chapter in a different direction. Originally it was going to be 'Yusuke gets pissed, shoots the professor with his spirit gun, Harry freaks and tries to get the other people to notice the fact that Yusuke snickers hysterically every time someone brings up Umbriges "unfortunate" accident, etc.'. But after writing that three times I decided I was sick of it.
I'm sorry if this is a little strained. I wanted to get this out, so I'm sorry if it doesn't meet your expectations. Also, I don't know when I'll update again. But AnnAisu, you have my permission to bug me incessantly in any way you can, until I do get the next one out.
Thank you to everyone else who reviewed (Puppetplay, eunice (whose name I can't fully put down because the document keeps on deleting it), Ariskari , and HayashiOkami).
Disclaimer: I don't own Yu Yu Hakusho or Harry Potter, but I do own this plot and everything that happens in it
Enjoy!
Dean stood up as well. "Why don't we go to the next class? Defense against the Dark Arts, right?"
Yusuke grinned excitedly. "Yup!" He marched out of the Great Hall, Dean running to catch up to him, leaving a quiet Seamus behind. "So," he turned to Dean, "where exactly is the class again?"
Dean just let out an exasperated sigh.
Chapter three
Yusuke thought it would get boring fast just walking around Hogwarts all the time. After all, there were only so many times you could see moving staircases and moving pictures before they got old. He thought that he would get over it fast.
He was wrong.
Eventually, Dean and Seamus would start to wonder why he was always staring in wonder at everything and then he would have to tone it down…Somehow. But as it was, he was thoroughly enjoying himself.
Dean was currently giving him discreet glances, walking beside him. They were all silent as they walked to their classroom. Yusuke in awe, Dean in confusion, and Seamus was just deep in thought.
Yusukes' happy attitude immediately disappeared like liquid once they arrived, leaking out of him and onto the ground before fleeing out of the classroom. Professor Umbridge was sitting primly on her chair wearing pink upon pink upon black. She was smiling sweetly, bright pink lips stretched into a smile that could be seen upon a loving grandmother. It didn't quite reach her eyes, however, as she watched the students pile in with a predatory gaze.
He sat down in his chair and slumped down. He didn't even bother to get out any pencils or paper, or even the book. He hadn't bothered to even check if he had all the right materials let alone bring anything.
His eyes darted towards Dean, deciding quickly that his 'friend' wouldn't loan him any more paper after the truth of what happened to the last few pieces was revealed. Apparently, he didn't find it as funny as Yusuke.
Seamus didn't seem to be a likely source to mooch off of. It was too late anyway, Yusuke realized, as the rest of the students entered at sat down. The show was about to start.
"Well, good afternoon!" Professor Umbridge called out, face seemingly frozen in that smile. Her voice was bright and cheerful, dripping with honey.
It was in that instant that Yusuke finally came to the conclusion on what to do. He had been agonizing for minutes about how this was going to go down and if he was going to do anything. If he could do anything since this was a pre-written book.
While the rest of the class started to stir slightly, some mumbling, Yusuke sat at attention and practically screamed, "Goodmorning!"
The entire class froze and turned at the same time to look at him. They had to have practice, he thought watching their expressions in amusement.
Professor Umbriged was staring at him like he was mentally challenged. Her body posture and face were completely frozen as if she was incapable of figuring out how to handle the situation presented to her.
In the end, it was a soft cough that broke the spell.
"Well then," she chuckled lightly, adjusting the top of her dress despite the fact it didn't need adjustment. "When I say 'good afternoon', you must reply with 'good afternoon, Professor Umbridge'. But not quite so," she hesitated, eyes drifting back to Yusuke, "enthusiastic."
A few of the students chuckled.
"Now one more time, please. Good afternoon class!"
The entire class chanted this time, Yusuke restraining himself. It wouldn't be good to cause too much attention this early in the class.
"There now, much better." She smiled sweetly down at the class. "Wands away now, quills out."
A few of the students hesitated, others glancing around at their fellow classmates as if trying to figure out if it was some sort of test. In the end, they all did what she requested, watching in apprehension as Umbridge tapped the blackboard with her wand.
Yusuke started to tune her out, not even bothering to look at what she wrote on the board. He instead focused his attention to the seat he was in. He was like a regular school chair, tiny and cramped. It would be bearable if it weren't for a single wooden bar running between the front two legs of the chair. He tried putting his legs above it, and then below it, and then to the side of it (which earned him a stern look from Dean when his foot 'accidentally' kicked Deans' leg).
In the end Yusuke determined that the bar must go. One second the bar was just sitting there minding its own business, next second it was skimming across the room, somehow managing to maneuver between the legs of chairs and people, before imbedding itself in the teachers' desk.
There was only a moment of hesitation before the class erupted in confusion, whispers and exchanges sent to one another, looking around to try and figure out where the wooden piece of chair had come from. Umbridge stood at the board that boasted the 'course aims', staring dumbly at the desk. Yusuke tried to look as innocent as possible.
Umbridge stiffly walked over to the wooden chunk. Leaning over she grabbed it and gave a little yank. It didn't budge. After several more hilariously failed attempts, she straightened and quickly tidied herself up before turning to address the class. "Who did this?" she demanded in a quiet and sweet voice.
Both Dean and Seamus gave Yusuke a look, after already coming to the correct assumption. Yusuke, however, just sank lower in his seat. He hadn't meant for it to go flying across the room and that thought freaked him out a little. He didn't think he had put that much energy into his kick. He would have to investigate the why later. If, of course, he didn't wake up before then. If he was going to wake up.
Umbridge had apparently given up trying to find the culprit in the sea of confused and innocent faces. "Go back to reading," she said tersely, sitting back down on her chair, more alert this time.
Despite the tense atmosphere, Hermione raised her arm diligently into the air, capturing Umbridges' attention immediately. "Do you want to ask something about the chapter?" Umbridge asked, a strained smile spreading across her face.
"Not about the chapter, no," Hermione faltered.
"Well we're reading just now," Umbridge waved her question off. "If you have other queries we can deal with them at the end of class."
"I've got a query about your course aims," Hermione tried again, this time succeeding in capturing the professors' complete attention.
"And your name is -?" Umbridge left the sentence hanging.
"Hermione Granger," she supplied.
"Well Miss Granger, I think the course aims are perfectly clear if you read them through carefully," Umbridge replied sweetly, glancing back at the board as if to prove her point.
Hermione hesitated. "Well I don't understand. There's nothing written down about using defensive spells."
Umbridge laughed lightly, putting her hand over her mouth delicately. "Using defensive spells?" she mirrored, voice almost mocking. "Why, I can't imagine any situation arising in my classroom that would require you to use a defensive spell, Miss Granger. You surely aren't expecting to be attacked during class?"
A few of the students eyed the chunk of chair imbedded in the desk at this point.
"We aren't going to use magic?" Ron sputtered indignantly off to the side.
Unfortunately it had been loud enough for the professor to hear and she quickly rounded on him. "Students raise their hands when they wish to speak in my class. Mr -?"
"Weasley." Ron belatedly put his hand in the air despite the fact he had already asked his question.
Umbridge promptly ignored him and turned on the rest of the class, whose arms were popping in the air every few seconds. She scoured the class before returning back to Hermione. "Miss Granger, is there something else you would like to ask?"
"Yes. Surely the whole point of Defense Against the Dark Arts is to practice defensive spells?"
Umbridges' eyes narrowed a fraction and the mask she wore on her face slipped ever so slightly. "Now Miss Granger, are you a Ministry-trained educational expert, Miss Granger?"
Hermione blinked in shock at the sudden turn of conversation. "No, but –"
"Well then, I'm afraid you are not qualified to decide what the 'whole point' of any class is. Wizards much older and cleverer than you have devised our new program of study. You will be learning about defensive spells in a secure, risk-free way."
Yusuke could feel Harry start to coil even from several seats back. Instead, he took the initiative. "Are you a Ministry-trained educational expert?" he asked lazily.
"Hand," Umbridge practically sang, whirling on Yusuke to find that his hand was already in the air. She took a moment to size him up, from his slouched position to his slight smirk. "Yes, dear, I am." She started to turn back to Hermione, clearly not understanding that Yusuke wasn't done.
"So does that mean you're one of those 'oldand clever' people you were talking about?"
Umbridge slowly turned back, seeing in dismay that his hand was still up. "Dear, if you have a valid question, then please say it. We need to get back to todays' curriculum."
Yusuke nodded sagely, leaning forward a bit in his chair. "So if you are one of the old and clever ministry people, then why aren't you in a better job instead of teaching kids about magic they will 'never use'?"
Umbridge started at his words. "I really don't think it's any of your business, dear," she said, the corner of her smile starting to twitch sporadically.
"Alright, dear," Yusuke mimicked.
Umbridge collected herself and turned back to the rest of the class. "Now if there aren't any more objections, we will be reading for the rest of the class."
"But, spells," Ron whimpered out weakly.
"Now, I know you haven't had the best of professors teaching Defense Against the Dark Arts here at Hogwarts. Some, downright dangerous." She ignored the glares from half of the class. "You have been introduced to spells that have been complex, inappropriate to your age group, and potentially lethal. In fact it is my understanding that my predecessor not only performed illegal curses in front of you, he actually performed them on you."
"Have you ever performed an illegal spell?" Yusukes' hand shot in the air, smile back on his face. "Sorry, I mean dear?"
Umbridge shot him a 'what the hell am I going to do with him' look, before promptly turning to the rest of the class. His question was largely ignored by most of the class.
A single hand wavered in the air for a moment.
"And you are, Miss-? Umbridge turned to the girl, a smile plastering itself back onto her face.
"Parvati Patil, and isn't there a practical bit in our Defense Against the Dark Arts O.W.L.? Aren't we supposed to show that we can actually do countercurses and things?"
Umbridge made a humming noise, her hands intertwined in front of her lap. "As long as you have studied the theory hard enough, there is no reason why you should not be able to perform the spells under carefully controlled examination conditions."
"Without ever practicing them?" Parvati cried out, surprise working its way across her face. "Are you telling us that the first time we'll get to do the spells will be during our exam?"
Several of the other students, who weren't particularly paying attention, were now staring at Umbridge intensely.
"I repeat," Umbridge said slowly, as if a change in the speed of her voice would make the students suddenly have an epiphany, "as long as you have studied the theory hard enough –"
"And what good is theory going to be in the real world?" Harry grounded out, hand still in the air from the first time he had tried to get the professors attention.
Umbridge finally turned towards him, the lines around her eyes crinkled as she looked down upon him. "This is school, Mr. Potter, not the real world."
"So we aren't supposed to be prepared for what's waiting out there?" Harry countered hotly.
Umbridges' eyes narrowed even more until they were only slits. "There is nothing waiting out there Mrs. Potter."
Harry rose ever so slightly in his seat, almost as if he was going to leap out. "Oh yeah?" he challenged.
That was it, Yusuke decided. He was tired of this boring conversation. His arm shot in the air again and before Harry could anger the professor anymore, he asked, "OWLs? So does that mean you eat birds as well as flies?"
The silence in the classroom was so thick it could be cut with a Spirit Sword. Everyone turned to look at him, including the professor who looked just as confused as the rest of the class.
The silence was finally broken with a, "what?"
Kurama sipped on his tea, before placing it back upon his desk. Papers with various legal jargon were placed carefully in stacks on the sides of the table. A single laptop sat in the middle of the desk, the light emanating from it brightening the room. His fingers moved slowly over the buttons as he scrolled down the document he was reading.
It was fairly late in the day. The sun was setting, darkness starting to claw its way back into the world and back it night. Many of the employees had left the building for the night, only a handful staying behind for the late shift.
He set the cup on a coaster on the desk, sighing lightly. It had been unusually quiet the past few days with no more disappearances. Hiei had been coming by more frequently, spurred on by this fact, figuring that it would be safe once more for him to return to his post. However, Hiei had given him a bit of space after a disastrous event concerning a very important meeting, Mr. Minamino, and several key investors.
He closed his eyes and pinched his nose. A soft disagreeing noise worked its way out of his throat as he was reminded of the particular incident. It had brought up too many uncomfortable questions that he would have rather not had to have sidestepped.
A muffled ringing brought him out of his thoughts. His sharp hearing immediately determined where the noise was coming from and he quickly stood up and walked over to the shelves and pulled out a particular book. Dread filling his stomach, he pulled out the communicator and answered it. "Hello?"
Botans' distraught face filled the screen. Her eyes were wide, face pale. Her hair that was normally perfectly held together in a ponytail was in disarray, several strands and chunks falling out. In the background was a noise that sounded almost like a soft wailing.
"Botan?" he asked apprehensively. "What is wrong?"
"It's Yusuke," she whispered, as if she was afraid to say it too loud.
It was then that Kurama figured out what the noise was and who was making it. He could see the brown hair in the background, bobbing up and down as she cried hysterically.
"He's gone."