A.N.: This chapter is one of the reasons why there is a "T" rating.

Disclaimer: If I owned Transformers, Simmons would have been squished a long time age. Since he still lives...

Chapter 3--Prank calls

Ironhide knew there would be trouble when the twins landed. Only the trouble did not involve himself for once. Both Sunstreaker and Sideswipe had somehow managed to find out why the human children were tormenting Simmons, and decided to help them do it. They did, after all, view Bumblebee as a younger brother. The weapons specialist had seen Sides looking at the cell phone Simmons left on the table with interest. It wasn't until later that evening that he found out what the red twin had done.

"Found you." Grumbled Simmons. His phone had been missing all day, making the normally arrogant human grouchy at the thought of missing any calls from his superiors. Now though, the phone was sitting innocently on the human sized table where he had eaten breakfast. Picking up the device, he noticed the blinking icon indicating he had voice mail. He growled, his ire rising. "Great. Just great." Hoping it wasn't anything too important, he started listening.

"Hey baby," came the voice of an unknown male, "I hope I didn't catch you at a bad time, but I need to hear the sound of your voice as I-" All the blood drained from the agent's face at the rather graphic message that followed. He pushed the delete button and the program went to the next in line.

"Sugar, I've missed you so much. All I wanna do it take my tongue and-" Pale green was now the dominate color on Simmons face. There was no way in HELL any man enjoy that!! Hurriedly, his fingers sought the delete button and pushed it, making way for the next voice mail.

"I wanna touch you, squeeze you, put my d-" that message was deleted before it could go any further. Simmons let out a whimper as he went through the voice mail box, each item recorded by a different male and each one even raunchier than the last.

Thoroughly grossed out and not a little freaked, the agent simply sat and stared at his phone wondering how all these people had gotten his number and wondering why they were leaving such…disgusting messages. Surely his out-going message would have tipped them off to having a wrong number. Right?

He pushed the button that would allow him to hear and change his out-going message and was shocked to hear a woman's voice all but purring in his ears. "Hello, darling. I'm sorry I'm not in right now," here, she gave a soft moan, dripping with pleasure, "I'm a little busy right now. Leave me a sexy message and I'll call you back." Another moan, louder and more intense than the first ended the message. Simmons managed to delete it and put out a new message (shaky as his voice was) before hanging up and slumping in a nearby chair. Holy hell…

The sound of laughing drew him from his inner musing to look to the doorway where Sam and Mikaela were walking in. White-hot fury exploded from his chest, traveled through his body and tinted the edges of his vision red. "WITWICKY!" he bellowed, leaping to his feet and charging across the room, intent on strangling the brat regardless of what the Autobots would do in retaliation. Unfortunately, he never noticed Sunny and Sides following the teens in and was startled when his feet suddenly left the floor. Sideswipe held the agent gently but firmly, raising him up so they could look eye to optic.

"What's your problem, human?"

"That brat was messing with my phone, changing my message board and getting others to prank call me!"

"Prank calls?" asked Sam, looking puzzled. "What prank calls?"

Growling, Simmons explained what he had heard on his phone mere minutes previous. Both teens were laughing before he finished his explanation.

"Well, I can see why you're mad. But I gotta tell you—I didn't do that." He grinned infuriatingly up at the agent. "Though that guy deserves major props for creativity and ingenuity. I never would have thought to mess with your phone, even if I knew how!" With that both he and Mikaela left, laughing long after they disappeared from sight.

Catching the smile from the corner of his eye, Simmons turned to snarl at the red Autobot. "What're you laughing at?"

"Human technology is so easy to manipulate."

Sideswipe set the gaping human down and he and his brother left to catch up to the teens, their own laughter following them as they walked.