You're going to have to read Weird Texas for any of this to really make sense. I've been told it's worth investing your time and effort in though. This is AU for Taker and his crew, and floats somewhere between comic verse and movie verse Hellboy. I'm a fan of both, so all discrepancies are made with the mind relaxed and attentive. Just sit back and enjoy the ride.
Disclaimer: I own neither Hellboy or the Undertaker. No profit being made here.
Chapter 3
The crew ended up including Mark, Hellboy, Jacqueline, the wolf, Bradshaw and of course the gator man. "What is your name anyway?" Hellboy asked him.
"I... I'm not sure. I don't remember." He said.
"Seriously?" Bradshaw piped up from the driver's seat of the enormous SUV with mud tires he drove. "How long did she have you?"
"The Dodgers had just won the World Series. I remember that." He said. Bradshaw lowered his eyebrows in concentration.
"Before or after they moved the team to Los Angeles?" Bradshaw asked.
"They moved them to Los Angeles?" He replied.
"In '58. The last time they won the Series as the Brooklyn Dodgers was in '55. They were in the '56 series, but lost to the Yankees." Bradshaw said.
"What year is it now?" He asked quietly. The interior was silent save for the blowing of the air conditioning. Perdita, the only one with any experience remotely close to what he had, raised up from her spot on the floor and looked at him with as gentle an expression as her face would allow.
"It's been a long time." She said. The gator man nodded, accepting that it might be better to not know. He then proceeded to touch her behind the ear as gently as she'd spoken to him.
"I'm gonna call you Fred." Hellboy announced in order to change the subject.
"Fred?" The gator man asked.
"It's better than Barney." Bradshaw quipped from up front.
"Fred." The gator man, now Fred, repeated. "It's been a long time since I was called by any name."
"Well Fred, that's gonna change from now on." Hellboy said.
Conversation was sparse after that. Mark spend the time thumbing though his well-used spell book and making further notes in the back. He explained after some time that he would probably end up using something similar to what he used to bring back Perdita before she'd made her 'choice'. "I just wish I knew what Paul used to change her and the others in the first place." He said.
"Paul." Fred said suddenly and quietly, obviously remembering something. "I remember a Paul."
"Short, fat guy?" Mark asked. "Eyes hollowed out like the Grand Canyon and the occasional falsetto rant when he was pissed off?"
"Yes, he... He came to learn but eventually he overpowered her. He robbed her of much of her power... That's why I was the only one for so long. She had to accumulate power again."
"Sounds like his M.O." Mark said. "He caused a lot of suffering in his life."
"Caused? He's dead now?" Fred asked.
"Yes." Mark said softly, and returned his eyes to his book.
"She had a book like you do. Perhaps it survived and could tell you what you need."
"That's precisely what I'm hoping for." Mark replied.
When Hellboy told Bradshaw to pull over, it was only Bradshaw who balked at the idea of going into the Bayou. He was a Texan born and the son of wealthy ranchers, and still hadn't quite adapted to life in Louisiana.
"You wanted to come." Mark said.
"No, Taker. I said I'd drive. Big difference." Bradshaw replied.
"Oh don't be such a fucking pussy, Bradshaw." The wolf said. Bradshaw turned and glared at her. Hellboy vaguely recalled how they avoided one another when he'd visited Mark's home the first time. Apparently, there was some long-standing tension between the two of them. "Come on, I know you got waders along with your fishing gear in the back of that ridiculously sized truck." She taunted. Bradshaw continued to glare. "I want you to come. I'll look after you, John. For a change." She added quietly.
Bradshaw only stopped glaring when he got to the back of the truck and started to dig out the appropriate gear. The wolf gazed mildly at him, seemingly unaffected by his silent threat.
The walk was what Mark imagined his own personal hell might be like. Hot, slow going, and humid enough to feel like he was walking through that otherwise fantastic gumbo that Jacqueline's family kept the recipe for very well hidden. Fred and Perdita led them on, feeling out the best places to step. Then came Bradshaw and Jacqueline, who chatted quietly in French, and Mark and Hellboy brought up the rear.
"What's up with Perdita and Bradshaw?" Hellboy asked when he was sure that the other parties were well occupied.
"I told you I brought Perdy back to her human form, right?" Mark asked.
"But it didn't last. Her human form shorted out, you said." Hellboy replied.
"Right, well just after I changed her back, I was called away on an emergency thing. Every so often a priest can't get an exorcism to stick, and they call me... Anyway, I left Perdy with Bradshaw and the stability of her human form lasted long enough for him to fall head over heels for her. And when shortly thereafter things started to go bad for Perdy, he kept her calm, essentially kept her sane long enough for me to get back. He wasn't happy with the choices we had to make, but knew it was the only way to save Perdy. They dealt with the fallout of this incident by ignoring that it ever happened as much as possible. But they think I don't know that, so keep it to yourself." Mark said.
"The rat lady seemed to recover well enough." Hellboy observed.
"Yes, but she was in Paul's service for a much shorter time." Mark said.
"No, what I mean is, what if Bradshaw was willing to go wolf for periods of time? If he likes her that much, he could do it. Stranger things have happened around you." Hellboy said.
"I don't know... But I'll get him drunk sometime and ask him." Mark said.
They followed the straight spine of Fred further and further into the bayou. It had gotten to be very dark by the time Fred stopped and let the rest of the group catch up with him and the wolf. Hellboy was glad of the large handheld spotlights that Mark and Bradshaw had insisted they carry. He vaguely recognized the setting. Mostly the mound of land and the scorched remains of the shack on top of it.
In the distance they could see eye-shine at the water level. "They are not any of the hag's victims." Fred said. "They are the rightful inhabitants of this place."
"I better get danger pay for this, Taker." Bradshaw said, blatantly teasing Mark, who chuckled.
"Not a chance. You beat me too often at poker." He replied. "Now, Red, did the hag stagger away from your shot or did she go down right away?" Mark asked.
"She skittered off into the dark." Hellboy said.
"Ah, so that explains that." Jacqueline said as she pointed her spotlight up into a nearby tree.
In a display of the most gruesome Christmas ornament ever, a lump could be seen perched in a lower branch. There was ragged, bloody clothing, and the lump was only discernible as human by the mostly intact leg and foot which could be seen hanging.
"Oh, ew. That's what I was smelling." The wolf said and naturally started to trot forward to investigate.
"Perdy! Arret!" Mark shouted and the wolf stopped dead in her tracks. She looked back at him and her eyes shone in the spotlight. Mark immediately dropped his voice. "Not this time, Perdy. Let me take a look first." Mark said.
"But she's dead. I can smell it." She said, suddenly timid and wary of her surroundings.
"She may be dead, but parts of her might still be lingering, dangerous parts." He explained gently, trying to compensate for the harshness of his order. Mark walked over to her and bent at the waist and touched her softly behind her ears. "I'm sorry I had to yell." He murmured. "I know it hurts your ears." His gesture seemed to immediately reassure Perdita. She leaned into him and licked in the general direction of his cheek.
"S'okay." She said. "Protecting family and all that. I get it."
"You certainly do. Stick with Bradshaw, Fred and Jackie for now until we figure out what this is and what to do about it." Mark said. He then straightened and gave Hellboy a nod, and they approached the tree.
Looking up they saw the remains of what was most likely the hag, not that her face could now be identified by conventional means. What wasn't bloated and purple had already been taken off by scavengers. Looking up further into the tree showed vultures roosting for the night, ready to take on the rest of the remains in the morning it seemed. "Amazing how quick vultures work." Mark observed.
"I wish the Bureau could be so efficient in cleaning up messes." Hellboy quipped. "I remember that line of gold teeth, Mark. It's definitely her."
"Ever notice how the inherently evil never have proper oral hygine?" Mark asked. He fished a small bag of salt out of his larger courier bag.
"Eh, I suppose if you're out to end the world and the like, flossing goes way down on the list of priorities." Hellboy replied, and Mark chuckled again.
Mark started making a circle around the tree with the salt. "Gotta keep her penned up if she's still around." Mark said quietly and gave a nod to the corpse.
"You can't tell?" Hellboy asked.
"It's harder when Paul has had a touch in something. I will be able to tell eventually, I just have to follow all the traditional routes to do so. He owned my brain for a long time."
"Yeah, but you took his memories, right? Shouldn't you be able to knock down any wall he's created like it was made of matchsticks?" Hellboy asked.
"I've been avoiding anything to do with him. I want to find a better way to be, so I've set up blocks against his memories. It eliminates a lot of useful information, but I will not be guided or ruled by his hate again." Mark said, and then put the bag of salt down and lit candles after he pulled them out of his pockets. He murmured a few words over his book and then looked up. "All right, where is it?" He asked. The corpse animated and looked down at him.
"No." The corpse hissed.
"You are already beaten. Tell me or I will make you tell me. Where is the book?"
"No." She said again. The hollows that had been her eyes glowed a sickly green. "I will not give my legacy to someone who doesn't even know my true name." She said.
"Fuck, the name thing. Always with the name thing." Mark grumbled.
"Tell me about it." Hellboy agreed.
Mark sighed deeply as if resigning himself to something, then handed his book Hellboy and grabbed the lowest branch of the tree. With a grace that left Hellboy in a bit of awe, Mark pulled his three hundred pounds up and swung his leg over the branch, and used another smaller branch to pull himself upright on it.
"You're like, the longest monkey I've ever seen." Said Hellboy. Mark chuckled and reached down for his book.
"You're never too old for climbing a tree." Mark said and then turned and faced the corpse of the witch.
"You take my misery lightly?" The hag asked.
"No, I don't. Because if if were up to me, I'd leave you to linger just like this for eternity."
"Why don't you then?" She hissed.
"Because that's not who I choose to be." Mark gave Hellboy a nod as he said it. He said a few more words over his book, and then stuck his left index and middle finger into her eye sockets.
The corpse screamed, but was unable to move her limbs. Hellboy assumed Mark had something to do with that. The glowing green light from the sockets left her and enveloped Mark's hand. Here Hellboy noticed a change in Mark's expression. There was a cold hardness in his gaze that he appeared to be fighting off.
Eventually his brow slacked and he took a breath and the hardness left his gaze. He gently moved his fingers and the green light started to collect into his palm. He then balled his hand into a fist.
"Camille" Mark said. "Where is your legacy? I've earned it. I know your name."
The light streamed out from the cracks in his fingers and a tendril of it waved in front of Mark's eyes. He nodded. "All right then, Camille. You are free." He said and opened his fist. The green light dispersed into the night.
Mark handed his book to Hellboy and swung himself down out of the tree. Without a glance to Hellboy or anybody else he started walking off in the direction they'd seen the gators' eyeshine.
"She knew you were coming, Red, so she hid it." Mark called. Hellboy followed behind with the spotlight. Mark stopped in front of another scraggy tree with vines and revival moss hanging off of it, and a thick pile of brush at the base of the trunk. He started pulling away the brush and revealed a hollow in the trunk. He reached in slowly and reverently and found the book wrapped in several layers of broad leaves and then in an oilskin.
He unwrapped it carefully, looking for a trap. His eyes were getting that hard look to them again, and this time Mark actually physically shook his head to refocus. This did not go unnoticed by Hellboy.
"Mark, wait a sec." Hellboy said. "Something's off about you. What's wrong?"
"I... I tapped into Paul's memories for the way to find hag's name. She was beautiful once, before Paul stole her power." Mark said. "I'm just trying to put the wall back up." Mark paused and took a deep breath. "You're right, Red... The information is valuable. It's selfish of me not to put it to good use."
"But not at your expense, Mark. Is this gonna hurt you?" Hellboy asked. His brow furrowed.
"A few bad dreams, maybe, but that's more to do with my own trauma as opposed to Paul's lingering influence." Mark explained.
"So long as that all it is." Hellboy said.
"I'll call you if it isn't." Mark replied and opened the hag's book. He flipped pages and spoke a few words, and it seemed that the writing became clear to him. He scanned several pages until he found what he was looking for and grinned. "Got it." He said.
"Easy as that?" Hellboy asked.
"This time, yeah. It's always nice when you can find the goods with relative ease... And you're right about Paul's memories. I should work out a way to access them safely. I could undo more of what he did." Mark said.
"An admirable goal." Hellboy said. "So, that's it?"
"That's it." Mark said.
"Good. Let's get outta this place. Creeps me out here." Hellboy said and Mark nodded in agreement.
It became clear as they were collecting things to go, that Fred wasn't ready to leave. He hung back with Perdita, both were sitting on a log. "He doesn't want to go, does he?" Bradshaw asked quietly.
"It would make sense if this is all he remembers." Jacqueline reasoned. Fred and Mark's eyes met and in an instant, Mark knew all he need to. Fred had no one left waiting for him. He walked over and sat next to him on the log.
"Camille loved you once." Mark said.
"That was a long time ago." Fred replied.
"You could start again." Jacqueline offered. Mark smiled at her resilience and inherent hope. It kept him going for sure.
"I... I'm not sure that I can. I was so wrapped up in her that everything left of me vanished. Even my true name is lost. She took what we might have had and twisted it, twisted me. There's nothing out there for me... I'll stay here. Bury her and guard this place so no one can corrupt it again." Fred said.
"You are always welcome with us." Mark said.
"I take comfort in that. But I need to stay... I'll also need this body to survive here."
"Okay." Mark agreed, very quiet and comforting.
"We can't just leave him here." Hellboy protested.
"We can respect his choice." Perdita piped up. "Even if it seems he has no choice. He is choosing to live. If we forced him away from here, he might go crazy. I've been there. I know." She explained. Fred nodded at her. She raised a paw and Fred met it with his scale-covered hand.
"Thank you for understanding." He said.
"Take it easy." She said. "And they are serious if you should ever change your mind." She then hopped down off the log, and made room for Hellboy to come in close when Mark nodded to him.
"Okay, Red, we'll see if this works and cut Freddy here loose." Mark said. "Anybody got any rope?" Hellboy had the closest approximation to hand in the form of his rosary. Mark made do and bound their hands loosely together. He held them as a priest might when marrying a couple. "Now Red, when I let go, unwrap Fred, and then yourself, and say I release you as you do it."
Hellboy did as Mark said, but there was no fanfare to accompany it. "How do we know it worked?" He asked.
"Give Fred an order and see if he does it." Mark suggested.
"Uh, kiss my ass?" Hellboy asked with a smirk.
"Fuck you." Fred replied and smiled as much as his face would allow.
"And with that exchange of profanity, my work here is done." Mark said.
"Are you sure about staying? I have to ask one more time." Jacqueline said.
"I am. Thank you all. Now, go set my brothers free." Fred said.
"Will do." Mark said as he shook Fred's hand. Fred seemed somewhat astonished to be doing something so human. "And if you ever need help, find me. You can do that?"
"Yes, I can." He said.
"Good. And good luck... for a change."
"Thank you."
Hellboy chose to try and block out the trek back to Bradshaw's truck. Brutal would be the word to describe it and uneventful enough so as best to be forgotten. Bradshaw insisted he was fine to drive despite the lack of sleep as he sucked back a Red Bull that had been in a cooler in the back of the SUV. The rest of breakfast consisted of protein bars, fruit, and whatever else had been hastily packed for them.
Hellboy took the front seat in order to keep Bradshaw awake while Mark and Jacqueline took the back to steal some sleep before they got back. The wolf settled in between them, curled up, but eyes half open and ears constantly twitching on the alert.
Hellboy discovered during that drive that Bradshaw could talk about any popular North American sport at length because he was something of an epic gambler. He explained that he and Farooq would both be running huge books if they didn't have other duties to attend to.
"Making money is fucking easy. I like betting because there's still a chance to it. Money managing has no thrill equivalent. Even the markets get boring after awhile... So, I gamble, but never what I can't afford to piss away in the first place." Bradshaw said.
"Mark must pay well then." Hellboy said.
"He pays well enough that I'm not doing something else if that's an indicator... Not that I could really give this up anyways. I've got a small bit of power in the sorcery department that was more trouble than it was worth until Paul taught me to channel it and hence let him abuse it. Farooq's the same way. We sorta sniffed each other out years ago and have been friends ever since." Hellboy looked over at Bradshaw, who was grinning a bit and taking another sip of a highly caffeinated energy drink.
"Nice to have friends." Hellboy agreed.
Mark was immediately back on his feet when they arrived home. He crawled all over the library, kitchen and a store room, amassing all he needed in an old whicker laundry basket. Jacqueline stuck close to him, reminding him to be calm and succeeded fairly well at it. Hellboy followed along at an ambling pace, watching them tag team the preparations. She explained exactly what they'd done in the prior Voodoo ritual and Mark asked questions about precisely what had been asked of each loa, which she answered knowledgeably. Hellboy admired how they worked together so effortlessly.
Between the seriousness, they cracked wise and complimented each other the way young lovers do, and this relaxed Mark. So by the time he had everything in order, Mark looked collected enough to take on the world.
He returned to the garden and started casually. He laid out his circle of salt and lit candles and placed them at the points of the compass. He was barefoot and still in his swamp dirty jeans and t-shirt.
Hellboy reasoned that part of what was so special about Mark, and a large part at that, was how he'd pared down this kind of magic to a minimalist design. Hellboy had seen nothing short of elaborate rituals in his life, and it was the simplicity and humbleness with which Mark did things that amazed him and even set him at ease. Mark had taken something dark and dangerous and brought it out into the sunlight. But he hadn't done this lightly or without forethought. Thanks to Paul, he'd spent a lot of time living in fear of his power, and was now purposefully making sure no one ever had reason to fear it again. Least of all himself.
Again there was no fanfare or drama when he started reciting. There were no clashes of thunder or darkening sky. He was just tuned into the universe completely as it was, and only asked for a simple thing: to make things right for some who had been deeply wronged.
The gator men gathered around him in an unorganized circle, waiting patiently. They'd taken Fred's choice surprisingly well. Mark gave them all a subtle mental image of Fred waving goodbye to them in the bayou, and they had accepted it.
Hellboy was beyond relieved when the gator men became men once again in a silent but still somewhat ghastly display. Most were quite young and had been shell shocked by the experience. They started at their once again human skin in disbelief, which gave away to laughter and then shouts of joy.
Their dignity was restored when Mideon and a few others started handing out bathrobes. Hellboy had to admit a certain curiosity as to why Mark would have those on hand in the house. Mark smirked when Hellboy asked. "This place is used for Voodoo and my arcane rituals. Things get interesting." He said and they chuckled. "Now, you still got that tooth?"
"Yep" Hellboy said, and took it out of its pocket on his belt.
"I've been thinking about it, and in order to avoid doing this one by one, I was wondering if you would be able to crush it to dust in your right hand?" Mark asked.
"Don't see why not." Hellboy replied.
"Great. All right, crush it and blow the dust towards our guests here, and I'll do my thing, and that should be it." Mark said.
Hellboy placed the gator tooth in his right hand and waited for Mark to give him the nod after he'd said his few words. There were a few cracks heard from within his fist, but he got the job done and all that remained of the tooth was cream coloured dust. He blew the dust off of his palm, and Mark smiled and closed his book. "That's it." Mark said.
"You know, it might be easier to take if something physical happened to reassure me." Hellboy said.
"I'd rather put my energy into doing the job right." Mark replied. "Now, I bet these guys are in the mood for an actual dinner. I think we'll make the closest pizza place very happy tonight." Mark said invited everyone inside to the large dining hall.
Over dinner, Hellboy asked Mark would do with his house guests. Mark replied that enough people owed him favours that he would be able to find most of them work and housing. If they weren't interested in that, he'd reconnect them with their loved ones.
"I gotta thank you, Mark. I owe ya one." Hellboy said.
"A very wise mutual friend named Liz once told me that friends don't keep tabs." Mark said and raised his beer to Hellboy. There was a clink of brown glass and the matter was dropped.
After a late evening, Hellboy finally climbed the stairs to what he figured was now 'his' room in the house. Once on the second floor, he passed an open door where a television was on, but the volume was lowered. Having not seen any TV for over a week now, and the hard work now over, he started to wonder what was on.
He poked his head in and found a common room of sorts, with a huge L shaped couch and couple of recliners. Even masters of the occult and their minions needed downtime he supposed, and that made him smile.
Looking at the couch made him smile wider. Bradshaw was stretched out on one length of the couch and the wolf was on the other, their heads meeting at the bed. One of Bradshaw's arms was flung above his head and gently grazed one of the wolf's ears. Both were dead asleep with eyes firmly closed. Hellboy noted that this was the first time he'd seen Perdita truly asleep.
He was so amused by the scene that he failed to even look at the screen to see what was on, and made his way to his room, still smirking. His thoughts turned to what he was going to do with the rest of his self-imposed vacation.
-Fin
Epilogue:
"It's not my fault." Jacqueline said.
"How is it not your fault? You're cleaning house!" Bradshaw shouted, disturbing the sound of crickets and frogs that could be heard from the back porch of the house. Jacqueline just gave him a dazzling smile in return. As she did so, she started to organize the money she'd just collected from the middle of the table and Farooq started to gather up the cards.
"Your girlfriend is sandbagging us, Taker." Bradshaw insisted.
"It's really not her fault." Mark said, as he was the only other one at the table who was having any success that night.
"How the hell can you mean that?" Farooq asked.
"If you spent half as much time looking for tells as you did looking at my breasts, you might be doing better." She explained.
"And as for me, I've seen them before. They're very nice, but I know I will have the pleasure and privilege of seeing them again at some point in the future, so they're not as distracting to me." Mark said and smiled at Jacqueline, who smiled back. Hellboy leaned back in his chair and guffawed, careful not to move his feet too much, as the wolf had chosen to take a snooze next to them. This was shaping up to be a great vacation.