On full moons now Remus goes out into the forest and howls. Then he wakes up disoriented, covered in blood that he prays is his own, and his throat is raw. He can't speak for days afterward.
This isn't depression. Wizards don't get depressed. When muggles do it's something wrong with their brains, but for him all emotion is tangible. Anger, fear, grief, joy-they have immense power. Remus must be careful. Personally, he feels like a swirling vortex of misery that could swallow the world.
He is alone, which is no life for a human and certainly not for a wolf. He can't keep a job or a girlfriend. All his friends are dead. His family (James, Sirius, Lily...) is gone. Even Remus' parents hid him away as a child because they were afraid of him, but more afraid of what the neighbors might think, refusing to let him attend Hogwarts until Dumbledore visited; they never loved their son as much as the friends he made at school did.
Now he's lost everything, including his living arrangements.
"You're a nice bloke an' all, Mr. Lupin," his landlord had said. "But you're also three months behind on rent, and with the economy the way it is..."
A post-war economy. Death Eaters and werewolves aren't allowed decent jobs. Not that Remus is a Death Eater.
His spare, shabby clothes and what little remains of his money are kept in a scuffed up briefcase. Sometimes he just boards the knight bus and rides aimlessly. Sometimes he will see what he thinks is the shape of black dog as the bus speeds on.
When they finally kick him off the knight bus around two in the morning, Remus really does see a shaggy mutt running up to him, which is very strange because this usually only happens in dreams or when he's very drunk. He is only a little drunk at the moment.
"Go on, get out of here!"
The dog just whines.
"What? You're a stray? Well, you can't come home with me because I haven't got one!"
Remus apparates to the first location he can think of, But somehow the damn dog has followed him. Their house is dark and it takes a considerable while for someone to answer his knock at the door. Molly Weasley blinks away tiredness from her eyes and stares at him in disbelief.
"Merlin's beard, Remus! Are you all right?" she exclaims, but in a whisper as not to wake the children. "Come in! Come in!"
"What about the dog?"
Puzzlement crosses her features. "What dog, Remus?"
He enters the house dazed, noting that this old place hasn't changed much since the war ended and he stopped visiting, and apologizes for not realizing how late it is. Molly just orders Remus to sit down in a comfortable while she fixes something for him to eat, and he obeys.
"What happened?" she asks gently.
"I got fired for missing work, and evicted from my flat," he replies quietly. "I rode aruond on the knight bus until they realized I didn't have anywhere to go. Then I saw this black dog and...I thought about Sir—you know. I wanted to die; I was afraid."
"Oh, Remus..." Her eyes fill with tears.
"There wasn't even a dog!" His head drops into his hands. "I think I'm losing my mind, Molly."
"Nonsense, Remus Lupin," she says sternly. "And no one would blame you if you were. It's only been a year!"
"Harry will be two-years-old," he observes. "Do you suppose Lily's sister treats him well?"
"I know she does, otherwise she'll regret it. That boy is so loved in our world."
After a brief pause, Remus says: "I'd have raised him myself, you know, if I could. If it was allowed for werewolves..."
"I know, dear," Molly sighs sadly. "We all would have, but Dumbledore insisted the safest place for Harry was with his muggle relatives."
He will try to reassemble the pieces of his life, because he owes it to James and Lily and their son, who wouldn't like to see him in such a state. Remus will try not to dwel on the fact that he is now the last Marauder—two are dead, one betrayed them. In a way he's died, too, but he won't dwell on it. Not anymore.