I clutched my arm as a drop of blood crept down my fingers. I knew I couldn't run fast enough to escape, so I just stood there, as if paralyzed, waiting for my inevitable fate. Jasper's eyes turned black with hunger as he stared at the fresh wound. I braced myself, waiting for him to lunge. After a few seconds I realized he was still standing there, and he looked like he was choking to death trying to restrain himself. I have to get away, I thought. I ran upstairs, into the bathroom and locked the door.
I looked at my arm. It wasn't a very deep cut. After I washed all the blood off my arm and hand, it just looked like a small scratch. I searched the medicine cabinet for something to cover it with. I found a bottle of liquid bandage, which I painted over the cut. I was pleased with the way it looked after it dried, but I decided to add another layer, just to be safe.
Knock, knock, knock. "Bella, are you all right?" asked Jasper from outside the door.
"I'm fine," I said. I opened the door.
"Let me see." He took my hand and looked at the cut. "Oh, that's not too bad. You sealed it pretty well."
"Yeah," I said. "It could have been a lot worse. I could be dead."
Jasper's face turned solemn. "We should leave before this happens again."
"Okay." I was anxious to get away and see Edward again. Just the knowledge that I would see him again soon was almost unbelievable. I had spent so much time wondering, with little hope that he would ever appear again, and now I knew. I knew I would see him for at least a moment. The future of that moment was all a blur in my mind. Whether he'd want to see me, whether we'd be together after that, was all a jumble in my head, but as long as I clung to that one moment, it was all I needed.
It all seemed too easy. I couldn't be sure what was wrong, but I what would make me think I was fixing things by going to see Edward? There was a reason why he left. This didn't make sense. Just as I felt a pool of doubt form inside me, it was replaced by an spontaneous wave of comfort. I relaxed in the passenger seat, trying to put my thoughts at peace to match the way I felt, but I couldn't. The disharmony jolted me awake from my thoughts. It was Jasper.
"Can't you just let me feel the way I feel for a minute?" I asked.
"Sorry," Jasper said as he lifted his calming spell. It was as if an anchor fell on my stomach, and I was overwhelmed with anxiety. What would I do if I went all that way and Edward didn't even want to see me? Things would go back to the way they were before. The gaping hole would come back. My life would be just as empty as before. I could feel the hole again. It was there, just as big as ever, but not so full of despair. But if Edward left me a second time, how would I be able to handle that? I would have to feel the same pain all over again. As my anxieties went deeper, I remembered that I didn't have to feel like this.
"Okay, I'm done," I said.
Jasper immediately calmed my anxiety. "What are you so worried about?" He asked.
"Um,... What if Edward doesn't want me back?" I asked.
"Then he's crazy."
"But what will happen? How can I go on living?" My eyes filled with tears.
Jasper turned to look at me and rested a comforting hand on my back. "If that happens, then Alice and I will move back to Forks to look after you."