Part Three

Thanks again for all your support! Here's another chapter. It's rather small, but I hope you'll like it anyway.

Regina watched her intently for a few seconds before she whispered, "But somehow, I always thought it would be you.." Her dark eyes were shining with unshed tears. She looked utterly broken, and breathtakingly beautiful. Her expression was so raw, so unguarded, Emma had to look away. Her entire body became numb and so cold she feared she'd never feel warm again. She bit her lip and in the silence heard her own breathing, rapid and uneven.

The power of them, the emotion and vulnerability in those words, hit her full force straight in her heart. She knew what those words meant to the brunette, what it meant she'd even said them. Regina had believed in her, she had believed in them. She never let anyone get too close, and yet she'd let Emma in far more than either of them had realized at the time.

Until this very moment, she'd never been fully aware of just how much she meant to the brunette or how much they meant to each other. She felt it in every fiber of her being. She couldn't say when it had begun- only that it was there and always would be. Their connection was a precious gift to be treasured and protected. No one understood her the way Regina did. She knew how to push her buttons and she knew how to break down her walls and get inside. Sometimes the brunette seemed to know her better than she knew herself. How could she have been so blind? What if she'd damaged their friendship beyond repair?

Ice-cold fear ran through her veins, causing her body to shudder involuntary. She was terrified that she'd lose her, terrified that all the things she'd taken for granted would be gone forever. The very thought alone nearly drove her to her knees in despair. She couldn't go back to the emptiness she had lived in, before Henry had come along.

Yes, it would be different this time, surrounded by her family. But there had always been something missing. It simply wasn't enough. Not anymore. Regina had become such a huge part of her life she couldn't imagine being without her. These past few months had taken such a toll on Emma, that she hardly knew who she was anymore.

Looking up at Regina from under her lashes, she choked out quietly, "I broke it, this thing between us, didn't I?" A stubborn tear leaked from her eye again, but she was too caught up in the moment to even care. There was nothing more to lose. Maybe she even wanted Regina to see her like this, so she could see how much she cared.

But the brunette didn't look at her, almost as if she were giving Emma time to recover. And the thoughtfulness of the gesture wasn't lost on her. It was as if their souls were reaching out to one another, craving that unique connection between them. It was one of the things Emma loved most about their friendship; their ability to communicate with no discussion, only looks and gestures.

It sparked hope inside her chest, because she still felt it, that sizzling crackle of heat that simmered between them. It was as if she could reach between them, she'd see a sparkle of electricity, that invisible, violet thread that still bound them.

She dared another glimpse at the brunette, ignoring the strange sensation in the pit of her stomach. She focused on her breathing, following each breath in and out of her nostrils. With each breath she took in, she filled her body with strength and determination.

After nearly a minute she collected herself and whispered, "I'm so sorry.." She waited until their eyes met before she continued, her gaze earnest and sincere. "You have no idea how sorry I am. I wish I could turn back time. I wish I hadn't done what I did. Regina, you have to believe me, I never wanted to stay away from you."

Regina blinked her brown eyes, leaning slightly towards her. "Then why did you?" Her voice was soft, but there was no mistaking the hint of challenge in the words.

"I.." Emma started, but then the words caught in her throat. She stared helplessly at Regina, willing her to read her mind and know what she was thinking, but she just sighed and looked away. She swallowed back the lump in her throat and turned to stare at the ocean. But when the brunette spoke again, Emma was surprised to find that she somehow had succeeded.

"You must stop hiding behind your wall of guilt. You can run from me all you want, but you can't hide. I know you, Emma." Regina said quietly, looking back at the blonde. "I know that you are hurting. And I know that if you could have changed things, you would have. But you had no right to push me away like that. After all that we've been through, didn't you know that I'd stand with you?"

Emma stared up into the brunette's face and saw her fear reflected in Regina's dark eyes. "Yes, I did know that. That's why I did it! Damn it, Regina, don't you understand you always end up getting hurt when you're around me?"

Regina's brows shot up and her eyes widened. She seemed taken aback by that. Then she regained her composure and shook her head slightly. The wind blew a strand of hair across her eyes, and she brushed it away before dropping both her hands into her lap. "You're wrong, Emma. You hurt me by not being around me.." she said hoarsely, pinning the blonde with her intense gaze.

Emma flinched and made a sound at the back of her throat. She braced herself for the inevitable stab of pain and slowly sat up, her body stiff with cold. She looked back into the depths of Regina's eyes and spoke in a quavering voice barely above a whisper, "I really fucked up, didn't I?"

"Yes, you did…" Regina instantly countered, but her expression appeared conflicted. She remained quiet for a moment and Emma held her breath. "But still, I'm not quite ready for this thing between us to end. I want to forgive you, but I can't right now. I do know that I want it to happen. I want to find a way to trust you again.."

Emma squeezed her eyes shut and a fresh wave of tears streamed down her cheeks. Regina raised her left hand slowly; then she seemed to stop herself and pulled back. She shook her head, a confused look on her face. She cleared her throat. "Look, I know this is hard on you, too. And I'm not trying to punish you." She said the last part more softly, and Emma could tell she really meant it. "You gave me a second chance, Emma, and I'm giving you one as well."

She slowly opened her eyes to see Regina staring at her. Their gazes locked, and her nerves endings sizzled at the deep intensity of the brunette's eyes. Her heart skipped a beat, and for a moment, the rest of the world faded away. She watched as the moonlight weaved its way across Regina's skin, caressing it softly.

But, oh, those eyes. Those eyes drew her in, promising things she couldn't even comprehend. Those eyes that looked at her like no one had ever done before, as if she really saw her. It was another one of the things she had taken for granted, but now seemed like the most priceless of treasures.

She blinked and refocused on the brunette, and the expression on Regina's face made her want to cry. She braced herself mentally for what she might say. Then finally, Regina spoke again in her deep, throaty voice. "But when you hurt me, that gave me the message that you don't care about me. That I wasn't worth your caring about me. I just need some time to process all of this. I don't trust easily. You know that.."

Slowly, Emma nodded, despite the fact that her eyes were still large with fear. "Do you trust me?" Regina asked so quietly, Emma almost missed her words. "Yes," she answered without hesitation. Unconsciously she moved closer, twisting her body to face the brunette more fully.

Regina flashed her a hint of a smile and said in a stronger voice, "Then trust me, Emma.." She paused for a moment, staring deep into the blonde's eyes. "It's going to take some time to build up that trust again. But just hang in there with me.. That will tell me that you do care, and that means everything to me."

Emma wanted to cry, whether from pain or relief, but she bit her lip so she wouldn't. She struggled to control her emotions, and she couldn't keep another tear from trickling down her cheek. "I can do that.." she whispered, keeping herself from reaching out to the brunette. "I want to make things right between us. I don't care how long it takes."

She just wished she knew how to make it go faster.

TBC