Rating: T Does not belong to me. But you knew that, so I don't bother. Also, references. And this is a pure dialogue!fic. And yes, there are OC's. That repeat. So sue me. They're not important.
Drabble 8:
"You remember the cookie-bots, sis?"
"How could I not?"
"...Well...if you think Isaac Remington's such a two-timer, why don't you send them over and see if he's brought his girl home?"
"I don't know. What would our...father...say if he found out I used his cookie-bots to spy on a boy?"
A giggle. "He'd probably bust out the big guns and go after Isaac."
"Wouldn't that be just great for my chances of getting with him?"
"Yeah, yeah it would! Although you'd have to get used to the wheelchair and catheter."
"...Shut up."
"Yes, mother."
"...SHUT UP."
"..."
"Daddy daddy daddy!"
"How's my littlest girl, hm?"
"HORSIE HORSIE!"
"Better go save Dad. I'll be right back. You think it over, sis."
"I...kind of...Fine! EDITH!"
"Sis! Sis!"
"Hi, Agnes. How was your day?"
"Fun! It was soo fun! We played in the mud and Ms Shuester HELPED me make mud-pies! Then I freeze-rayed everything and we had a snow-fight!"
"You what?"
"How'd you get the freeze-ray, Agnes?"
"Edith!"
"Was there a secret passageway or did you blow something up or...?"
"Jeff gave me! He likes me! Aren't I likable?"
"Now, there's no need for tha-yes, Agnes, you're very likable, stop with the puppy eyes now-stoppit. Stoppit. Thank you."
"Aww! And Daddy made me a go cart that had AG on the front for Agnes! And it's all pink and silver and pretty!"
"Pink, huh? I wonder what mine is like."
"Oh, I saw yours, Margo. He's put magnesium flares in the wheels."
"...That's...pretty cool, actually."
"He's a great dad, isn't he?"
"...Yeah, I guess."
"You're not still going off on not calling him 'Dad', are you?"
"Edith...it's just that..."
"HI, JEFF!"
"Mczketziowcz!"
"Okay!"
Blam.
"Just that what? You're an idiot? He's adopted us completely. I'm happy here, Margo. I wasn't happy, not even with Mom."
"I know. It's just...well...I said he'd never be my Dad. So I...I don't like going back on my word, Edith."
"You lie all the time!"
"But that's not the same thing! I'm just...arrgh! I don't say 'never' or 'ever' really easily, and I meant that one! So I can't go back on it, Ed."
"You're nuts, big sis."
"Say something to him soon, okay? Oh, and..."
"Proper spider-bots? Not cookie-bots?"
"I figure there's less chance of Isaac or Jake swallowing these ones."
"Good point."
"I am wise in the way of boys."
"Dream on."
"Hey, I've got Jake wrapped around my littlest pink-y. This one. See? See? It says 'Jacob Remington', right around there."
"Yeah, but Jake's not a boy. He's a leech."
"You take that back."
"I will not."
"...Okay, okay. You're probably right. But he does whatever I say, so he's a great friend."
"Friends aren't measured by how much they'll do for you, Ed."
"...Just use those bots? Please?"
"Okay."
"Edith?"
"Yes, big sis?"
"I planted them. Could you put the feed up under your bed? We'll crawl under and pretend to play family or something."
"Won't Dad see through us?"
"..."
"...Oh, yeah. I forgot. Yeah, okay, let's do that."
"You know, I'm so glad that Ms Hattie isn't around anymore."
"Yeah, me too."
"..."
"Hey! That's C-"
"Keep it down!"
"You keep it down!"
"So you were saying?"
"That's C-"
"-Is her hair dyed? It's reeeeally blonde."
"Is yours dyed? It's about the same color. Would you let me finish talking?"
"Nope! Anyway. Follow Isaac, follow Isaac, yeah! Go spider-bot, go!"
"HORSIE! HORSIE!"
"Dad's on his own."
"..."
"Ooh. Nice chest."
"H-hey!"
"Y-Yeah."
"Jake next, then."
"...Shush. Hey, he's all depressed right now. Still a really nice chest, though."
"Edith!"
"Come on spider-bot, get closer. Come on spider-bot, get closer. Get closer...yes!"
"...krrrszkghghkkkhghResolving Audio Function. Please hold."
"What the-"
"Audio functions? Cool."
"...I don't understand! What did I do that Margo's ignoring me now? I did everything to tell her I really...I can't believe it myself but I love her. I love her so much and I can't say anything. And she picks herself up and runs away from me. Didn't she see how I pushed that stupid girl away from me the moment I saw her? ...Oh, that sounds like I'm cheating on her, but she hasn't even looked at me differently after I kissed her. So why should she care? She's just...argh!"
"He seems to be obsessing about you, sis."
"...Shh."
"But she's so...hhhh. I don't know. Maybe flowers? Um, chocolates? What do girls like. Oh, wait! She said ice cream!"
"Ice cream's good. You really like ice cream."
"Shhhh."
"I didn't even like her, she was just using me...to get...a girl... jealous... waitaminute."
"Ooh, now he's taking off his- Oh, wait, no he isn't. Stupid fanny pack. Whenever I hear that zipper..."
"Stop thinking dirty thoughts!"
"Huh? What was that? Sounded like Margo."
"..."
"Shh!"
"And that sounded like Edith. What the-"
"Get away, get away!"
"Are Margo and Edith outside or something? Hm...Nope, guess not.
Stupid Tris. Oh, no! Why hadn't I thought of that? She was using me not to make her 'girlfriend' jealous, she wanted Margo to be jealous...why didn't I remember that she hated Margo when Margo came into school? I only thought - do a nice thing - and now I've ruined it with Margo. I...oh..."
"So he's really not a two-timer, Margo. You see? If you hadn't given in to my spider idea you would have never found this out."
"Oh, I guess so. Oh, Isaac. I'll have to make it up to him tomorrow."
"Give him a kiss!"
"...N-not that."
"Oh, you want to go further?"
"EDITH!"
"That sounded exactly like Margo!"
"...can we switch feeds?"
"Sure. This one's to their kitchen, so Jake'll be right th-WHAT."
"Well, one Remington's definitely a two-timer."
"J-Jake?"
"Is that tongue?"
"I..."
"You really like him, huh. C'mere."
"Thanks, sis."
"...Did his father just bust in on him and his girl kissing?"
"SERVES HIM RIGHT."
"...Papa, it's not what it looks like!"
"And do you know what it looks like? It looks like we could be losing money through alimony, that's what. Get your hands off that female!"
"I quite like his father."
"I looooove him. Stupid Jake! Stupid stupid Jake!"
"Papa, what's wrong?"
"Here enters Big-Love-Of-Margo's-L - Ooh. Ouch. That must have hurt."
"I wonder if we can ask a minion to go for popcorn."
"I shouldn't be enjoying this, but I so, so am..."
"Papa!"
"And why is she without clothing in our house! But, uh, nice choice, boy."
"Eurgh..."
"PAPA!"
"That's it! Your family is sick! Goodbye, Jacob Remington!"
"Ooh, she left a massive handprint!"
"I'm going to match that one with my own tomorrow, on his other cheek."
"I want to watch that."
"I'll tell you when I'm doing it. ...Hey, I know that look."
"HORSIE! HORSIE!"
"Neiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh!"
"..."
"I'm going to get...Papa... out of this."
"Oh, my gosh! Margo! You really...you...you're..."
"Dad! DAD!"
"-eiiiiiiiiiiiiggghhh Edith? What's happened?"
"Margo has something she wants to say to you!"
"...Ohh?"
"I love you, Papa."
"LOVE YOU TOO, DADDY!"
"Me three, Dad."
"...I am deeply touched, Margo. Edith. Agnes."
"Since we all love you now, and we're one big happy family, can I get the freeze ray off you?"
"Mm...No."