Authors Note: Sorry about the wait guys! I've been really busy the last few days and have just got around to this. I would like to thank my 7 followers, 1 review, and 1 favorite - you guys know who you are:) - for adding me! You don't even know how happy i was when i logged on and saw that! Well summerlol247(and whoever else has been anticipating this), here's the letter! Enjoy :) ~~~Ninja-Rider~~~

Chapter 3: Unwanted Arrival

I'm stuck at the first two words. Too much of a coward to read any further. I walk over to my door and close it, not wanting any single soul to see my reaction. But, who am I kidding? The house is probably bugged with cameras as well as microphones. I cross the room and crack open the shade that is tightly drawn over my windows, and am struck by how the light comes into the room. It looks so different not being in the dark, like this bedroom maybe is used be someone who actually lives, not someone who stays closed up from the world in it.

I sit back down, swallowing my fear and urging my courage to come. It tends to be absent more often then not, so when it doesn't come I decide that I don't have to be strong, I just have to read it. If only once to satisfy Haymitch and tell him that I did.

I look at the letter, awed by how the sunlight reflects off the page, and how precise the handwriting looks. I begin again and tell myself not to stop until I finish.

Dear Katniss,

I think it would be smart to start out simple.

How are you? Dr. Aurelius tells me you haven't been answering the phone, so he doesn't know either. I wasn't sure if he was lying or not, so I tried calling you for myself. He wasn't lying.

I have been through a lot of therapy with Dr. A, (that's what I call him, its easier then trying to pronounce his real last name) and he says I'm improving. I don't see how, I still have flashbacks. There bad.

I see you in the first games taking care of my leg, where Cato had cut me with his sword. But, soon after you see the blood that comes from the wound you start to morph. Into a mutt. One with dark fur, and curled up lips that form a snarl. You grow so large that you could crush me with one quick step.

They are still shiny, those ones. And I'm slowly beginning to understand the difference between real and not real things. Like the game we played during the time I was on the Star Squad with you. I still don't remember what exactly happened during the times we didn't play the game. It had given me a sense on relief, like a burden I was not given a choice to bare being lifted off my shoulders, yet at the same time my mind would flood with more questions, causing me to get frustrated.

I don't think it's fair that two kids from District 12 have had to go through all of this. But, this is the hand we've drawn, and it had to have had some kind of purpose. Some kind of reason for all of these mishaps to happen, even if some are terrible.

Dr. A. has given me a train ticket to 12. He told me that I could go whenever; the ticket doesn't have a set date. He says that I have been through enough therapy and am prepared to return home. I told him that it could -would- be your choice of what I do.

I understand if you don't want me to come home. So, if you decide that it would be okay if I do, just send me a letter. If not, you don't have to answer, I'll understand.

Peeta

P.S.-

The last part is smudged, as if he didn't want me to read whatever he had written. It makes me wonder if the bold part of Peeta, the part that gave him the courage to tell the entire country he was in love with a girl since he was five, has gone away.

I hadn't realized i was crying until a teardrop splattered onto the paper. My vision turns blurry as more begin to refill the lost ones places. I don't know how to react. Should I cry, should I scream, should I find a dark closet and sit in it until somebody has the decency to come find me?

Instead I just sit, tears escaping the cracks of my eyes, until the paper becomes slightly soggy. I fold it back up and place it back in the envelope that sits on my nightstand. I stuff the letter in my pocket, not caring if it gets wrinkled, as I race down the steps. When I reach the bottom I grab my hunting jacket that still hangs on the hook by the door since the last time I used it and slip it on.

I fling open the front door and run across the lawn to Haymitch's house. If that's even a word to describe the vacant looking box with a roof he calls home. I walk up the stairs to his house and hesitate as I reach for the doorknob. He's going to yell at me for not reading it sooner, I think. I shake my head; it's either now or later. I twist the knob and walk into the house.

I let out a cough as the stench of unwashed bodies and old liquor hits me like a brick in the face. I make my way to the living room, trying my best to step over the piles of soiled clothing, and stop at the doorway. Leaning against the frame I can see the back of his head as he sits on the couch.

"Did ya read it, Sweetheart?" he asks before he can even see me. I cross the room and take a seat across the room from him. He smirks at my puffy eyes. "Well that's just giddy! Cause' Effie will want to know what he said." He says and tips back a half gone bottle of something strong, because when he pulls it down his face twists up in a weird grimace.

"Haymitch! Katniss is not in her house!" trills a voice neither of them are ready to hear just yet. She lets out a shriek, "Oh my god, is that-eww!" Effie stomps into the room, with her high heels, mint green wig, and makeup to match. "Haymitch, you said Katniss should be in a closet-oh! There you are honey."

I look over to Haymitch and glare at him. Did he really have to tell Effie I would be in a closet? He shrugs and burps, receiving a disproving look from Effie. I look back up to the woman who just bombarded his house and realize i am not prepared for whatever reason she decided to come for.

She comes over to me and kisses my cheek, "Katniss, I don't think it's good for your health to be in Haymitch's house, that goes for me to, and I need to talk to you. Will you please follow me?" It was more of an order then a question, so when she takes my hand and practically shoves me outside, I don't have a choice to reject. I sit down on the wooden stairs that is on the front of his house, glad that I have on my fathers hunting jacket to block the bitter winds. As for Effie she begins to pace, I don't know how she can in those heels, saying it will help her keep warm.

"I didn't realize District 12 gets so cold! I mean the Capitol does to, yes, but not until at least a little further into the season!" She says while sidestepping to miss a rock that was on the sidewalk. I imagine her not seeing it and tripping. Oh, how her face would look as she came closer to the ground. The corners or my mouth twitch up, just a little, probably not even enough to be noticeable.

"Effie, it always gets cold earlier then the Capitol. It's nothing new." I say, " What did you need to talk to me about anyway?"

"Nothing really, uhh, yes, nothing at all." She says with a smile. I can tell she's lying; Effie isn't that hard to read. Capitol people as a whole aren't that hard to read, "Can't I just come and-umm-visit my old victor once in awhile?" She asks with a weary laugh.

"Effie tell me what you wanted to say."

"Oh Katniss, you know I can't lie to you... But I was told not to tell you," I give her a look, "fine. Don't say anything until I'm finished," like I would say anything, when do I really ever talk, I nod anyways, "Okay, well, umm... Haymitch told Peeta that you said yes to the letter and was just to lazy to write one yourself."

"I could have answered without Haymitch's input." I say turning grouchy at the thought of Haymitch doing everything for me, I'm still capable of some things. Like writing a letter.

Effie's eyes turn sympathetic for a moment and she looks like she isn't finished with what she has to say either... "Peeta just got off the train."

Author's Note: Here it is! Tell me what you think by clicking on that little review button on the bottem of the screen, that would make me so happy! Thanks so much for reading.~~~Ninja-Rider~~~