Thanks for the reviews. Keep them coming!
Sara
Oh God! This is an absolute fucking nightmare! Nicky, poor Nicky. I can't bear to watch him struggle for his sanity in that box, but I can't tear my eyes from the tiny screen. The green glow of the night vision camera makes him look like he's covered in mold and moss and I can't help but wonder if he's cold. I can see him shiver but I can't tell if it's from the temperature or fear. I wish it was me instead of him. Nick has so much spirit in him, so much life, so much love in his heart. He deserves to live free, marry and have a house full of little Stokes children calling him Daddy. I, on the other hand, am sure that I will be processing corpses for the next 50 years and eating canned tuna over the kitchen sink. Oh God! I have never understood how the decisions we make can destroy us in an instant. The flip of a coin sealed Nick's fate, just as a phone call from Vegas sealed mine.
Standing in the AV lab, I can feel Grissom standing close beside me and the hairs on my arms stand at attention. I want nothing more than to reach out and wrap my arms around him and sob until my throat is raw and my eyes are bloodshot, but I know he will never be there to comfort me. So, I wrap my arms around myself and hold on for dear life watching the screen. My eyes are burning now and I can't close them. I'm afraid if I even take the time to blink, Nick will be gone. Losing him would drive a hole into my heart that no one could patch up. Grissom is still standing there, just an arm's reach away. I can see his chest rise and fall with slow, steady breaths. He is remarkably calm in the face of this disaster. I know he's not on the inside because I can see a faint tiny tremor in his right hand as he reaches for the mouse to click the button on the screen again. That tremble speaks volumes to me and gives his true emotions away. I have always known that he's not a robot.
I heard Catherine on the phone earlier and I can bet who she called. There is only one person she knows that could pay the ransom and I have to wonder if being Sam Braun's bastard daughter will take care of every problem in her life now. Grissom chastised her for getting close to that man, but hey, your family is your family no matter what they did in the past. Take what you can get after all. I envy her in a way. Her father never ended up lying in a pool of his own blood on the kitchen linoleum. I wonder if Catherine would be nicer to me if I just told her like I told Grissom. Well, it sure as hell didn't make any difference with him, so who the fuck am I kidding? It would just give her more ammunition to take to Ecklie and he'd be up my ass again. That's one man that I definitely don't want anywhere near my ass thank you very much. Ugh. The thought of that makes me gag.
NO! NO! Grissom can't take the ransom to that maniac. He may never come back. My heart is pounding now harder than I have ever felt it before. I have an ominous feeling in my gut and I know he won't come back. I'll never have a chance to tell him how much I love him. I run through the lab hallways like a lovesick idiot searching for him. His office is dark and he's not in the break room. I feel my face flush and my pulse pounding in my ears.
Damn! He's already gone. If I call him, he'll berate me but if I don't, I may never get another chance. Oh, God! What a fool I have been. Now, it may be too late! I have to do something. I need to process something. Anything. Work. Work. Work. I'll throw myself into work and it will all be fine. Look at the evidence, what did I miss? Anything? Is there any shred of evidence that I overlooked? I hang my head in disgust when Brass enters the layout room and looks into my eyes. My stomach drops into my feet when I meet his eyes.
"What do you mean there was an explosion at the drop off?!"