Anime/Manga: GRAVITATION

Title: I Cry

Characters: Shuichi and Eiri, slight Hiro x Eiri

Summary: Yuki made Shuichi leave by cheating on him with Hiro. When Shuichi finally accepted his defeat and turned his back and walked away, why did tears fall from Eiri's eyes?

DISCLAIMER: Gravitation is all owned by Ms. Maki Murakami, story and characters included. I just used them for some slight drama. Don't worry, Yuki and Hiro fans out there, I'm not breaking them up here, hehe ^_^V

AN: This is a story based from Shayne Ward's I Cry song.

WARNING: YAOI! Boy's Love so if you're not into men loving men, then please don't read. Don't forget to leave reviews and message me. :3 Love to hear what reader's think. And sorry for the late updates. I mean really, really, really late. 3

I think mangakas are faster than me!

I Cry

Why did I ever let you slip away?

Can't stand another day without you...

Without the feeling I once knew

Sometimes, I would like to know what my star looks like!

Eiri puffed a smoke as he looked up at the night sky. It was clear and the stars just scattered at the vast sky like glittering diamonds. The breeze was cold and the streets was illuminated by the full moon that was tonight. He was sitting alone in the park, like he always used to whenever he needs a breather to think up for his novels. It was eerily silent, and no one has passed by ever since the last hour. He felt like he was the only person in the world, the only one there is. He slowly rose in his sit and started to walk the cemented path towards the park's exit.

From where he is now, he can see the sea. There were no honks of cars or voices of people to bother his mind. A moment later, he found the same exact path where he picked up Shuichi's crappy lyrics, the grade-school scribble that was Glaring Dream. He smirked at the thought. Just thinking about Shuichi brought him too many memories that fought in his mind like the tornadoes and storms. He can only recall the the last concert Shuichi did before laving Bad Luck, before leaving the limelight he was used to stand in. When he sang the last lyrics of Glaring Dream, a song solely dedicated to him, his tears were shining in the colorful onslaught of lights. And when he cried, the world cried with him.

And when he left Bad Luck, he left everything behind him. And that included him. Now Shuichi is nowhere near him, he can finally feel why it felt so empty. While he admitted to have fallen in love with the brat's best friend, there were things that he was thankful to Shuichi for. And it will be the more true to say that he will never find someone like Shuichi, so selfless, so beautiful, unselfish, and loving. One day, he will find Shuichi in the arms of another man, happy and contented, most of all, loved. He will be basking in a love like his, innocent and pure, fiery with passion and exciting.

When Eiri looked up at the night sky once again, he recalled Shuichi's question. What would be his star be like?

He never got to answer Shuichi for that. He took a paper and pen and wrote down the answer that was supposed to be said to the pink-haired baka.

Shuichi's star is warm. The one that shines even in the midst of storm. The one that lights while the others slowly fades. Shuichi's star promises hope...forever...

Why was it so hard to fool myself that everything was my fault and not yours?

Eiri arrived at home to find that his apartment is empty. Hiroshi was out on a visit to his parents and he was practically all alone. He took off his shoe and took off his jacket, threw it on the couch and went straight the kitchen. He opened his fridge and took one bottle of beer. He chugged it down like he does with water. Still holding the can in his hand, he went straight to his study and opened his laptop.

He was trying to save some ideas for his new novel, but when all thoughts of Shuichi flooded his mind, the story he was meaning to write goes flying out right the window. Honestly, it was his guilt speaking for him. While he was being happy and got his wish to have Hiro beside him, Shuichi must have been stuck in a rut. He knew more than everyone else what happens whenever Shuichi became desperate or anguished. His guilt escalated more when Tohma pointed out straight to his face what he did to Shuichi was like what the real Yuki has done to him. Betrayal. The word still doesn't taste good in his tongue.

As the hurtful memories of Shuichi's tear-stricken face runs in his reverie, he found himself moments later that he was looking at Shuichi's pictures. They were pictures that depicts the many facets of the singer. His violet eyes, how they shine when he's happy, how they look empty everytime he finds Eiri with another woman in his bed, or when he feels down because Eiri yet broke another promise. His smile that always brings light, hope, happiness without chains. His facial expressions when he thinks, when he is annoyed, or when he is overjoyed.

And then Eiri realized that everything that brought them to their fateful break-up wasn't Shuichi's fault. If he wasn't willing enough to start a relationship, he should have pushed him away before he became involved too deep. Shuichi just learned to love, and shouldn't he be happy that during those years of neglect and leaving him to a one-sided love, he was still lucky the kid stood up by his side and refused to let go? He just failed to see whose fault that Shuichi left.

It was his. Him and his indecisiveness to keep the most important people within his reach.

Is your love always a lie?

Eiri stopped looking at Shuichi's pictures and decided to just sleep. No words were formed in an hour of sitting in front of his laptop and his eyes hurt. Closing the door of his study, he went straight to his bedroom and jump on the bed almost too quickly. He took off his glasses and turned off the lampshade. He tried to close his eyes to get some sleep but even the needed sleep is deprived from him.

Whenever he lie down in his bed, he would always recall the nights with Shuichi. Nights with Hiro was exciting, almost intense and it always leave him satisfied and exhausted. But the nights with Shuichi is something that he would never experience in his nights. Is another man being shown the passionate side of Shuichi tonight? He never failed to ask himself that. But of course, he won't air it out to Hiro, who has cut all ties with Shuichi, maybe to alleviate a little bit of his guilt cheating on his best friend with his lover. He can remember how Shuichi would smile after the steamy nights, and the audible murmur of "I love you, Yuki".

When Shuichi found out about his affair with Hiro, he can see how much he was struggling not to scream in front of him. Instead, he lowered his head, cried and asked him: "Who do you love most, me or Hiro?" When Eiri aired out his unfavorable reply to Shuichi's inquiry, he tried himself not to touch the singer. Shuichi cried in anguish, and asked him another one: "Is your love for me always a lie? Or have you even tried to love me, Yuki?" Did he ever love Shuichi? Maybe he had cared about him, he was fragile and weak, without any backbone to support himself if he needs be. He only acted as what Shuichi desired for him: to become the perfect lover. But Eiri misinterpreted Shuichi's real desires about their relationship and then everything became messed up and he had lost Shu.

He always wanted to leave Shuichi, for he can't stand his antics. And now, not even Hiro can make him feel the things Shuichi used to make him feel. In his heart, he must have questioned himself many times why he can never love someone so true to him as Shu. Why did he let him slip away when there were so many people who had envied him for having the pink-haired baka to himself. Why does he always hurt the ones who loved him?

With that thought, he drifted off to sleep.

"I will forever love only you... but if someone would love me, I'd love them back. More than I have loved you."

Eiri woke up in sweats after having another dream again. He put both of his hand on his face and even contemplated of pulling his hair our of frustrations. Why was Shuichi haunting him? Isn't it enough to see him so distraught with guilt? Not that he can admit it to the people he knows. Not Hiro, not Tohma. Hell, not even his siblings. Why was he always shown the heartbreaking goodbye of the brat? Damn it all, why?

Why can't Shuichi's memories let him be? When he decided to cheat on him, he didn't even think about any consequences. He was even ready to face Shuichi if he throws a fit head-on. And he was ready to leave him the moment he knows of the truth. It was all too easy for him. He was not committed to him and he didn't promise him anything. It was all Shuichi doing the assuming and the dreaming, right? So why does it have to be him, of all people, to feel guilt? Why does he have to suffer in his sleep?

He sank back into the bed and recalled his dream. Shuichi was standing in the park where he meet him, his pink hair flowing with the wind, his face serene and calm, his body relaxed. He was smiling at him, his hand clasped together. And there he was, with all his glory, returning back his smile with a frown, his brow creased. A cigarette in his mouth and his hand in his pockets. Shuichi was just standing there, looking at him with admiration and love, the same things he makes him feel.

And then he spoke in his beautiful voice: "Are you happy, Yuki? You have to be. I am not there with you anymore to comfort you when you feel sad. I can just hope that you would live happily without any grudge in your heart... Remember that I love you, forever... always. But I believe that I'd have the happy love story you have now. I don't mind waiting. Maybe, just maybe, when somebody would love me. And then I would love him back. I would still wish that you'd love me, in the next lifetime, I guess. Farewell, Eiri... Farewell..."

Eiri wanted to just find Shuichi and ask him: "WHY DO YOU HAVE TO BE SO NICE EVEN IN MY DREAMS!?"

The morning after, Hiro found Eiri still asleep, with a pad in his hand. Hiro approached the bed, took the pad in his hand and read the contents. He never knew he can cry so much after reading Eiri's works.

"Your star shines so brightly it blinds me. You blinded me so bad that I can't see the path where I was going. Where was I supposed to go again? I guess, to where there is your light only. You died in my arms, but you lived when I send you back to the sky. It's where you belong. You may now be out of my reach, but I can still see you from where you are, right? I'm sorry, but you are the only star I didn't deserve to touch. Sorry, Shu. I am sorry..."

Hiro smiled while wiping away the tears in his eyes. "Liar. You told me you didn't care about him... I missed him, too..."

Nyaaaahhh! An update after a long while! *love love* Please send me your reviews and what you think! I'd really appreciate them! Thank you. And Gomen if somewhat is sounds OOC... Oh well, :)