This is actually the one I'm expecting to be the least good, but on the bright side (of life, dodo, dodo dodo dodo) the next chapter is from an insane person, and that's always fun!

Dear Chuck,

No, I'm not going to visit any time soon. Yes, I still carry knives wherever I go. No, I am not going to go sit in an office of a head doctor and talk about my problems and hope that they can cure my amnesia. Yes, I got in a bar fight this weekend. No, I am not going to teach at your school.

And now that all the usual introductions are out of the way: Hi Chuck, I hope you're okay and none of your students have tipped you out of your wheelchair recently.

Really.

If they have, tell me, and I will visit you soon for the sole purpose of killing them.

Not literally.

Well, not completely. When you told me 'no killing the students' last time I was there, did it include maiming? Yes? Damn.

But really, you need to hang them by their ankles in the basement for an hour the next time they pull a stunt like that. It'll help teach them a lesson. I know just spot to use. I'll call it the Danger Room and send someone there every time fireworks are set off or cherry bombs are put in someone's lunch or public displays of affection are flaunted. Tie them up myself.

Work's been pretty slow for me lately, except for this one case of arson. It was in that secluded part of town, where the warehouses are. Two of the three buildings that caught on fire were empty, and the third didn't burn long enough to cause too much damage. There doesn't seem to be a reason for someone to set them on fire other then to just... set them on fire. Whoever this person is, they are seriously messed up.

Chances are that no one would have even seen the blaze until half the warehouses were on fire, except Creed was in the area for 'undisclosed reasons' (*cough* beer break *cough*) and could report the fire straight away, along with proudly letting everyone know that he'd picked up a suspect. Because we all know that Creed is useless, and him picking anyone up is pretty impressive.

I was the second closest to the area, but I still didn't get there until the fire was under control anyways. Fun fact: turns out your niece, Anna-Marie, was the suspect Creed picked up. You might have to bring her back to the misfit school to re-fix her. (Or 'help her make better decisions in life' or whatever you do at that Institute of yours)

Actually, don't do that. No one but Creed really believed that she was the person who set the fire, partially because the fire had been started by pouring gas all over one of the buildings and she clearly had not handled that much gas recently. And besides, she kept going on and on about how some crazy red-haired guy stole her matches then ran away laughing hysterically.

They took her to the station, and I got to stick around and investigate instead of eating lunch. Hurray for me. And I had a package of beef jerky and everything.

On the upside, I got free doughnuts after work.

But before the free doughnuts, I just looked around the area for more evidence. At first I didn't find much, and I was actually about to leave when, strangest thing, I find a cockatoo, all charred up and missing some feathers. When I picked it up, it made a funny 'Or-or-o' sound, so that's what I started calling it, because we all know I suck at that kind of thing. It was either that or Sooty, so its name is now Ororo.

After I drove Anna home from the station and stopped her mother from breaking down into tears on the front stoop, I brought the bird into a veterinary office. In case you were wondering, it's a she, she probably got caught in the blaze and fell right from the sky when she tried to fly away while her wings were on fire, and half the bones in her body are now broken.

I ended up leaving her there so that they could treat her, but I'm not sure what to do with her once she's ready to leave. The Mrs. is scared of birds, so I can't exactly bring her home.

I was thinking… kids like animals, right? And your school has kids… unless there's something you're not telling me. How about I give the bird to your school, and she could be a class pet or something.

Give me a response when you find the time. I know time is a hard thing to come by recently.

- Logan

P.S. Seriously. Danger Room. Consider it.

Huh… that actually turned out better then I thought it would. It started off boring and clinical when I found it.

Review, or I will send my minion otters to your house to ruin all of your nice new spring flowers.

Don't have spring flowers? They'll plant some. AND THEN RUIN THEM!