It's finally finished! Sorry for all the delays, but it turns out writing steam is incredibly hard- or it is for me anyway, doesn't look like I'll be writing the next Fifty Shades of Grey anytime soon! To be honest a few of you might be a bit disappointed as it's pretty tame, in the end this reverted back into more of a love story than an erotic one, but I'm finally happy with it so hopefully you will be too. As always though let me know what you think irrespective of whether it's good or bad as I love getting all of your reviews. Thanks for all the comments so far and I'll try and get the next chapter of When Love was Young up by the end of next week.
Bending her head so that Rhett wouldn't see her blush, Scarlett raised nervous hands to his shirt and began to unbutton it. Pulling the fabric out from where it was tucked into his trousers, she made her way slowly through each button until his shirt was undone and slid down the sides of his stomach to rest upon the mattress.
Without thought she reached out and placed her hand on his now exposed stomach noticing with regret how these last few years of drink and decay had softened and enlarged his once firm and taunt physique. Saddened by this thought, she moved her hand quickly upwards and buried it instead amongst the dark mass of his chest hair, enjoying the way that the wiry strands scratched at the soft skin between her fingers.
Scarlett started when she felt the thump of Rhett's heart beneath her hand, the movement jerking her out of her trance-like state and making her painfully aware of what it was that she was currently doing. She had never been this bold with Rhett before, in fact in all of their previous encounters she had hardly even looked at him let alone touched him so brazenly.
Suddenly feeling uncomfortably exposed, Scarlett wished that Rhett would take control as he'd always used to do and made to withdraw her hand. As she did though, she risked a quick glance up at Rhett and was shocked to see him lying back on his pillow, his eyes closed and the corners of his mouth turned up in a small, but satisfied smile.
It was the happiest expression she had seen on his face since before Bonnie died and, while her embarrassment was still strong, she could not bear to end her tentative ministrations when they appeared to be bringing him some much-needed peace. Emboldened by the proof that he was enjoying her attentions and wanting to prolong her overdue exploration of his body, she moved instead to feather her hand along his collar bone, stroking it gently back and forth as she teased his tanned flesh gently with her fingertips.
Rhett let out an almost inaudible sigh, his frame relaxing beneath hers as he let go of all the tension and anxiety of the past years and simply allowed himself to take pleasure in the present. Seeing him do so, Scarlett grew more confident still and trailed her hand up to cup his face beneath her palm.
Rhett flinched at the unexpectedly tender touch and opened his eyes to look directly into hers. Squirming under the sudden scrutiny, Scarlett's earlier apprehension returned to her and she shot back a foot on the bed, pulling her hand sharply away as she did so.
Blushing brightly, she ducked her head in shame and was thinking about escaping the room with what little still remained of her pride when she felt Rhett capture her hand in his larger one. Stroking his thumb reassuringly across the back of her hand, he pulled her so that she resumed her former position and placed her hand gently, but firmly, back on his cheek.
At the look of hesitation she gave him, he whispered rakishly, 'I won't tell anyone if you won't.' His words causing a glimmer of the old, mocking Rhett Butler to fight its way to the surface for the briefest of moments, the ghost of his once permanent twinkle lighting up his eyes for one tantalising moment before they resumed their dull, deadened state.
Her breath catching at the sight of an expression that she never thought she'd see again, Scarlett felt herself smile with true joy at the thought that Rhett and her were actually to share a secret after having kept them from each other for so long.
Answering her smile with one of his own, Rhett relaxed back onto the mattress before closing his eyes and allowing Scarlett to continue on from where she had left off. Squaring her shoulders in determination, Scarlett fought to supress her engrained physical shyness and moved her hand along Rhett's cheek to carefully trace his features with her touch.
Starting at his cheek she moved sideways to run her fingertips up along the bridge of his nose and across his thick eyebrows before dropping back down to circle around his eyelids, stroking the soft brush of his eye lashes as she did so. She noted with pleasure that the deep worry line she had noticed between his brows while he was sleeping had now disappeared making his face look years younger.
Rhett hummed softly under his breath at the feel of her caresses, the vibrations sending shivers up Scarlett's body which lay so close to his, but yet did not quite touch. Wanting to get closer to him, she leaned down and extinguished the space between them, eagerly pressing her body along the lines of his.
'Scarlett', Rhett breathed, the sound of her name of his lips bringing a smile to her face as he lent up and wrapped his arms tightly around her back, pulling her impossibly closer. She took advantage of their newfound proximity to pepper his face and jaw with kisses before, in a sudden rush of boldness, working her way down the thick column of his neck while raking her nails through the soft mat of his chest hair.
She felt Rhett slowly come to life under her sudden onslaught as the mask of consenting passivity that he had worn until now began to fall away. Roughly his hands grasped and slid across her back as if he was trying to feel as much of her at once as he possibly could. Knowing she had only moments left before he took control, Scarlett was overcome with the need to assert her ownership over him in some way before he in turn took full possession of her. Having reached the junction where his neck met his shoulder with her open-mouthed kisses, Scarlett suddenly sunk her teeth into his warm flesh, tasting the tang of his skin as she bit down sharply. She felt Rhett tense beneath her but was not deterred, determined as she was to leave her mark upon his body and claim him, if only temporarily, as her own.
Rhett swore heatedly under his breath as she began sucking on the mark and, fisting his hands into her silk nightdress, he grabbed hold of her and flipped them both over so that he was now on top, the solid weight of his body bearing down firmly upon her own. Burying one hand deep inside the flowing black locks of her hair, Rhett angled her head towards his own and, without further warning, urgently attacked her mouth, plunging his tongue inside and kissing her with a savagery and a completeness which made her forget everything else.
Reaching up to wrap her arms around his neck, Scarlett was determined that the kiss would not be a one-sided affair. Instead it would be the very first that they had shared in which both were as passionate and desperate as the other. This after all was what she had been longing for since the moment he had surrendered himself to her, this feeling of utter submersion, of drowning in a pleasure so intense that it was capable of wiping away all the hurt that she had ever suffered.
Feeling her respond to him like never before, Rhett groaned against her lips and resumed his actions with increased vigour. Finally, panting for air, they broke reluctantly apart, each reading the same look of overriding need and reckless abandon in each other's eyes. For if tonight was indeed to be their last night together then they would give all of themselves and worry about the consequences later.
Scarlett watched as Rhett bent his head and, mimicking her earlier actions, began kissing his way slowly down her neck. Once he reached the base though he did not stop as she had done, nor did he pierce her skin with his teeth, but rather he continued on southwards, making Scarlett shiver with both anticipation and fear as his head descended upon her breast.
Softly he nudged her nipple with his nose before catching it between his teeth and sucking on it gently though her nightdress. The silk grew warm and moist against her heated skin as he worshipped her body with his mouth.
Letting her flesh slip from between his lips, Scarlett whimpered as she felt him move away and position himself so that he was kneeling over her on the bed. 'Hush, love.', he murmured huskily as he took in her forlorn expression before reaching down to catch the hem of her nightdress and sliding it up over her flushed body. Throwing it carelessly onto the floor beside the bed, Rhett lent back down over her, the material of his open shirt tickling her over-sensitive skin. She squirmed pleasurably under this added and unexpected caress as his mouth once again moved to cover her now exposed breasts.
While his tongue ran tantalising circles around her nipples, Rhett moved so that the flat of his hand was pressed against her sternum before running his coarse, calloused palm down the centre of her stomach. Her skin erupted in goose-pimples at his erotic touch, a fire igniting deep in the pit of her belly which she never wanted to put out.
Rhett's hand continued its downward path, skimming lightly through the silken curls of her pubic hair towards the place that she longed for him most. The tip of his index finger nudged against her mound and Scarlett purred deep in her throat, her hips springing up from the mattress as she pushed herself eagerly into his waiting hand.
'Patience, pet', he teased as he pulled his hand away from where she ached for his touch, the twinkle returning once more to his dark eyes and this time showing no signs of leaving. Scarlett whined at the loss of that most scandalous of sensations, making Rhett chuckle as he leaned his weight on one elbow and unbuckled his belt before sliding his trousers and undergarments off in one swift and well-practised move. Scarlett caught sight of his large and straining member for a second before he changed positions to begin removing his shirt.
Suddenly overtaken by a rush of emotion, she reached out and grabbed his forearm forcing him to still his movements. Rhett froze at her action, his playful eyes turning serious and wary in an instant. Knowing that he feared she was rejecting him, Scarlett hurriedly sought to ease his fears without wanting to give away her true intentions for fear of evoking his scorn. Feeling suddenly self-conscious under his piercing stare, she almost wished that she had just let him take off his shirt, but there was just something about the way that the white fabric fell around her, the way it seemed to block out the suffocating darkness of the rest of the room and cocoon her and Rhett, that she was loath to relinquish.
'Please' she stuttered lamely, 'leave the shirt…I like it on you.'
A look of utter incredulity swept across Rhett's face along with a brief look of relief at the fact she did not wish to stop before he frowned slightly as if trying to work out the punch line to whatever elaborate joke she seemed to be playing on him. After a few tense moments in which he scrutinised her expression though he seemed to accept her plea as a genuine one and simply nodded his head in silent assent before dropping his arm back onto the bed.
Scarlett breathed a sigh of relief at the fact he didn't seem to want to question her strange request any further. Instead he leant down and, kissing her gently, aligned himself with her opening as if he sensed that she was too exhausted and fragile to be teased tonight, but rather wished only to be united with him as quickly as she could.
Swiftly he thrust into her, making Scarlett sigh at the exquisite sensation of being filled after being empty for so long. Rhett stilled inside her to give her time to adjust to his intrusion, both of them using the moment of calm to revel in their reinstated connection. Scarlett also took this opportunity to clumsily tuck the sides of Rhett's shirt underneath her back, securing him to her as best she could.
It was silly she knew, but she could not help but feel that by trapping the material between herself and the bed she was in some way tying Rhett to her side and making it impossible for him to leave her.
Surrounded by a solid curtain of white fabric as she now was, Scarlett was reminded of a time long ago when, as a little girl growing up in Tara, she had used to hide under the small table in the entrance hall whenever Mammy was angry with her. The table was draped in a white cloth which extended down to the floor making it the perfect place to burrow under and wait until Mammy's formidable temper had cooled off a little.
So ingenious a hiding place had it been in fact that Mammy had never once thought to look there for her as she marched through the rooms of the house, either shouting Scarlett's name so loudly that people in Jonesboro' must surely have heard it, or cooing to her softly with false promises of cake and forgiveness if she'd just come out from where she was hiding.
Scarlett had spent many hours concealed under that table, often going out of her mind with boredom, but knowing that any amount of tedium was better than facing Mammy's wrath. Over time the place had taken on a special significance for her though, it was her secret spot, a space that no one else had ever taken the time to discover, proof that she knew her beloved Tara better than anyone else ever had or ever would.
Eventually, she had become even craftier, stealing food from the kitchen and storing it away under the table in preparation for the next time she would need to find refuge under it. She had enjoyed many a secret picnic there over the years, laughing to herself as she munched happily away while everyone scanned the house and grounds searching for her.
She had never felt as safe as she did under that protective canopy of white fabric, and had cried bitter tears of heartbreak when she finally grew too big to fit under there unnoticed.
It was this same sense of security which she felt now as she lay underneath Rhett, wrapped up in each other and cocooned by a blanket of white she felt as if they too were hidden away from the rest of the world. Here they could finally be together without fear, in a place where the presence of Ashley and Belle and the ghost of a beautiful, blue-eyed girl could not touch them, in a place where they could finally be free.
Free to love as they were meant to do, made to do even, before wars both national and emotional had risen up between them and created barriers that could not be overcome no matter how hard they might try.
Feeling a rush of sadness rush through her, Scarlett raised her head and desperately planted kisses along Rhett's jaw and mouth, instantly finding solace upon touching his skin with hers. Rhett however took her ministrations as a sign that she was ready for him to continue and, drawing her in for a swift, scorching kiss, he began to move.
His movements were powerful and deep as he withdrew almost completely before thrusting forwards so that he was sheathed entirely within her. With each stroke Rhett's forehead came to rest against her own, his jet black eyes boring into her emerald ones making Scarlett feel almost as if it was their souls, and not just their bodies, that were being fused together by their coupling. The heat of his stare was overwhelming and together with the friction of their bodies it proved too much for Scarlett to bear silently, causing a guttural moan to leave her lips as he moved above her.
Upon hearing the sound, Rhett increased the power and speed of his movements, causing him to hit the secret place within Scarlett head on and forcing another moan from between her lips. Lifting her arms from his back she snaked them through his hair, pulling none-too gently at the strands as she attempted to draw him closer despite the fact that not an inch of space existed between their aching, sweat-covered bodies.
This sense of needing him closer gradually began to consume Scarlett's hazy mind as the delicious, burning coil in the pit of her stomach began to stretch itself ever closer to breaking point. Her body screamed at her to surrender herself to the blissful sensations that Rhett was so expertly evoking, yet her mind recoiled from the idea in a state akin to blind panic. Her desire to reach the peaks of ecstasy being countered by the overriding fear that once she found her completion so too would her marriage come to a swift and decisive end.
She writhed under Rhett, this time not in pleasure but in worry, his presence above and around her beginning to make her feel more suffocated than safe as her head warred desperately against her heart in a battle that felt as if it would tear her apart.
Panting now in fear rather than desire, Scarlett frantically cried out Rhett's name in the hope that he would save her now as he had done so very many times in the past. Reading the tortured expression in her eyes, a look of recognition appeared on Rhett's face and he murmured reassuringly, 'Don't fight it, hush now, I know it's hard, I know.'
Gazing up at him, Scarlett felt her panic subside slightly at the realisation that Rhett did indeed know what she was going through, that he must have fought this same internal battle every time he'd lain with her in the past and known that once their coupling was over she would return to her aloof, unloving self.
Reaching behind him to untangle her hands, which had tightened into claws around his head in her distress, Rhett placed them instead down on the pillow either side of Scarlett's face and entwined his fingers with hers.
'You can let go now honey, I've got you.' He breathed, his lips pressed up against her ear so that the warm caress of his breath brought her impossibly closer to the edge of the precipice.
One more thrust was all that it took, his arm muscles rippling either side of her head as he drove himself faster and harder into her core.
Throwing back her head in a mixture of ecstasy and defeat, Scarlett was unable to withstand Rhett's sweet torture or the scorching flame embedded deep in his dark eyes any longer. Instead she finally let herself go, crying out her release and forgetting for those few, blissful moments that in doing so she was in fact releasing him too.
Above her Rhett thrust twice more, drawing out her pleasure, before withdrawing and spilling his seed onto the sheets with a deep groan and a whisper of her name.
Pulled from her state of euphoria by the stinging pain of her sudden emptiness and the knowledge that tonight's events would not lead to her growing round with his child, Scarlett whimpered helplessly as her vision blurred under a wave of hot tears.
Almost instantly she felt Rhett's arms wrap around her body, almost as if he was fighting to hold her together now that she felt like she was falling apart. Softly he rolled them over so that he lay on his back while she lay on her side next to him, her head carefully pillowed against his chest. Though he no doubt meant the gesture to be a comforting one, the fact that their position so closely resembled the one Scarlett had first taken up upon entering his bed that night only served to bring on a fresh bout of tears. It seemed to her to suggest that while they had shared such a beautiful, intimate moment together nothing between them had actually changed, that despite all of her best intentions he still planned on leaving her at the first light of dawn.
Upon hearing her increased sobs, Rhett began to stroke her back soothingly while planting kisses amongst her disordered curls. 'Shh,' he said in a gentle tone, 'I know it's difficult, but you promised that you'd let me go.'
Scarlett shuddered as a violent sob wracked through her body as his words confirmed her worst suspicions. So he was leaving her then. After everything they'd been through tonight he still intended to pick up his bags and walk out of her life as if nothing had happened. Of course though, she thought bitterly, her sadness turning swiftly to anger as it often did where Rhett was concerned, to him tonight had been nothing special, why he probably engaged in such acts with women every night of the week! She had been a fool to think that it would change his mind and an even bigger one to think that opening herself up to him in that way would ease her pain rather than increase it tenfold.
Yet, hurt though she was, she could not quite bring herself to regret her decision to lie with Rhett, after all he had been leaving anyway and she was glad that now at least she would be left with one shining, perfect memory to sustain her over the coming months and years.
Still though she could not seem to stop the flow of her tears which ran down her cheeks in a steady stream and began to form a pool on Rhett's chest. Upon feeling them drip onto his bare skin, Rhett pulled Scarlett tighter into his embrace and ran his hand through her long hair.
'Scarlett please stop,' he said, a hint of worry clear in his tone despite it being overlaid with amusement, 'for once I do not have a handkerchief about my person and unless you want to ruin this shirt that you seem so oddly fond of then I'm afraid you are going to have to cease crying.'
Scarlett giggled despite her anguish, the sound coming out more like a gurgle as she fought against the rising lump in her throat. Even in her pain she could not help but take comfort in his teasing tone, a tone that she had not heard for so long and had sorely missed. Perhaps things weren't completely lost after all, indeed this was hardly the first time that Rhett would leave her for an extended period of time, back during the war he had always been gallivanting off somewhere or other for months on end and in more recent years he'd been forever running away on trips with or without his precious Bonnie in a bid to escape their marital strife.
Maybe this was just another of those times, a much-needed break away from their current situation in order to give him time to heal and the strength to begin again. For if it was true that Rhett Butler was forever running out on her, then it was also true that it was always her that he came back to. He'd never been able to stay away permanently, had always been pulled irrevocably back to her side, for she was the only woman he had ever loved and the only home that he had ever truly known.
Encouraged by this thought, Scarlett finally felt her tears begin to dry up as she pushed all her fears to one side and snuggled deeper into Rhett's intended embrace, moving her head up so that her face was burrowed into his neck.
'What time are you leaving in the morning?' she asked quietly.
'Before nine.' He replied stiffly. Yet, Scarlett couldn't help but notice that while he pushed her away with his words, his arms unconsciously tightened around her waist. Her lips twitched into a smile as she wondered if maybe she wasn't the only one who was battling between their head and their heart tonight.
Wiping the remnants of her tears away with the back of her hand, Scarlett felt the emotional and physical strain of the last few hours gradually begin to overtake her body and she yawned widely as her eyes began to shut of their own accord. With a sigh she surrendered for the second time that night, acknowledging as she did so that she had fought as best she could and that if Rhett was to stay then it would be as a result of his own internal battles now.
Closing her eyes and giving herself over to the blackness, she clutched Rhett tightly against her and prayed that when tomorrow finally arrived he would still be by her side.