Chapter 3 – Desperate Measures

"Where are we going anyway?" he asked, looking over his shoulder.

"Outside," Ron choked out. "I don't think Common Room is a safe place right now." They glanced aside and saw the Slytherin Common Room entrance wide open.

"They canceled all passwords from the looks of it," Hermione said in utter horror.

"That means…"

"Don't say it, don't say it…" Ron said, covering his ears.

"Complete orgies," Harry said. "We have got to put an end to this."

"Maybe Dumbledore can help?" Hermione suggested. Then she gasped. "Oh shit! What if he becomes a Dark Wizard?"

Harry crumpled to the ground, trying to catch his breath. "If his feelings change, he'll certainly become a Dark wizard… Oh hell, how are we going to solve this?"

"Why am I suddenly thinking Snape is a kind man and a great teacher?" Ron groaned. "Could he help us? He knows a lot about the Dark Arts."

"He's already been taken by that Merlin forsaken spell," Hermione said. "Maybe Trelawney has something to predict that can be of use."

Harry stared at her in horror.

"Oh dear lord. Hermione, you hate professor Trelawney!"

"No I don't." The answer came far too quickly.

Harry shook his head. "We need a protection spell, and fast. Would protego work? Aw who cares. Protego!"

A shield appeared around the three of them. Hermione and Ron shook their heads as if to get rid of their confused thoughts.

"We need to get to Hagrid first. Spells don't work that well on him, being part-Giant and all." They ran off to Hagrid's shed, almost breaking down the door and barging in.

"Hagr…"

"AAARGH NO! I DIDN'T JUST SEE THAT! EEEWWW!"

Hagrid was feeding Lucius Malfoy strawberries in a very sensual way. The whole image was just completely wrong.

They stumbled back outside and tried to get the image out of their heads.

"It figures…" Harry said quietly. "They hate each other…"

"I'm just going to go over there and vomit," Ron said, looking pale as a ghost.

"Is that what Trelawney and I are going to be like?" Hermione whispered, thoroughly disgusted.

"Not if I can help it," Harry said determinedly.

"Any more ideas?" he looked at his friends.

"After this, I don't think we really need to see Dumbledore anymore," Ron stated. "My mind can't take much more."

"Maybe…" Hermione didn't finish her thought.

"What?" Ron asked impatiently.

"Well… Malfoy is well connected… Maybe you can get him to find out who did this, Harry."

"EEWWW NO!" Ron and Harry screamed in unison.

"Well, it's the only option we have, really," Hermione said in a firm tone. "Unless Ron wants to try and get information out of dear Severus."

Ron shuddered and whacked Harry over the head.

"No. You try Malfoy, Harry. It's our only chance."

"You son of a…" Harry gave Ron a death glare.

"This is what you do best, right? Saving the world, or in this case, Hogwarts?" Ron tried to convince Harry. "At least Malfoy's good looking. Imagine me and Snape…"

"You are going to owe me big time, Ron. And when this doesn't work out, you try Snape." Harry stretched out his hand.

Ron took it, looking unhappy.

"You two'd better go hide in the forest. I'll find you as soon as I'm… oh gross…"

"Good luck, Harry," Hermione said, a look of pity in her eyes.