Thank you all for reading and reviewing! =) To make up for the cliffy I left yesterday, here's a quick update!
Moving on~
The fuck?
Renji stared at the carrot-top in disbelief, who looked like a deer caught in the headlights. He looked down at himself, his fingers frozen in the middle of trying to get his stuck zipper to cooperate. And then he looked back up again—his neighbor's curtain had been drawn.
Right about now, his old self would've stormed over to the house next door and beat the crap out of the boy. He'd aim for one of the eyes, teach the guy a lesson for looking at things he had no business looking. Then he'd probably give him a knee in the gut to top it off.
But that was the old Renji. The new Renji just walked over to his window and shut his blinds. Didn't mean he couldn't fume on the inside, though.
No wonder he'd felt as though he was being watched. He had ignored it at first, thinking that he was being paranoid. But the hairs on the back of his neck refused to stop tingling, so he'd finally looked up.
Ichigo. The idiot's name is Ichigo, if he remembered correctly.
How much did the guy see? Renji wondered. Feeling a bit stupid but too curious to stop, he stood next to the window. Okay, not too bad, the wall came up to a couple of inches below his waist. So the idiot couldn't have seen much, at least nothing down there.
But, still. He'd seen the tattoos. A big chunk of Renji's past that he was hoping to forget. Except he could never forget it of course, unless he became blind. Every day, whenever he undressed, he was assaulted by the sight—the ugly, disgusting sight of his body covered in those markings.
The markings that he had talked him into getting. It had been fun. Romantic, even, because each tattoo—they were added gradually even though they looked intertwined now—held a different meaning. Their first kiss, the time he told his dad about him, the time he told his family about him, the first time they slept together, the first time they walked out in public as a couple.
It made him sick now just thinking about it. During the day, when his clothes covered them, he could at least pretend that they didn't exist, forget them, even for a little while. But at night, that's when he couldn't escape from them.
That's why he didn't have a mirror in his room, not even in his bathroom. He couldn't bear looking at his own reflection. But he could still see most of them; on his arms, his chest, his abdomen. There was no way to hide.
And now this idiot had seen him, intruded on his most private moment. Renji felt anger burn deep in his gut and well into his chest.
Breathe.
He closed his eyes and exhaled slowly. Then he sucked in a deep breath, just as slowly. Exhale. Inhale. Exhale.
His heartbeat gradually calmed down. That was a close call; he hadn't felt so angry for a while, not even yesterday when his supervisor gave him all that shit. He couldn't afford to. Not after what happened.
Ichigo slid down the wall, his eyes wide in horror.
Shit. Shit shit shit shit.
His heart felt like it was about to burst out of his chest. He couldn't believe it—he'd been caught. He'd been caught. Caught. Renji had looked right at him, caught him in the act.
What was he supposed to do now? Apologize to the guy?
Yeah, hey, about last night, sorry I looked.
Despite himself, Ichigo snorted at the absurdity of the thought. He had no idea what to do, and his stomach lurched when he remembered that he'd have to face the redhead the next day.
That night, he dreamed of Abarai Renji for the second time.
It didn't go too badly.
It didn't, because he never got the chance to talk to Renji, because Renji simply refused to meet his eyes the next day. Every time Ichigo looked his way and tried to read his expression, to see if he could somehow begin a conversation, Renji averted his eyes, and he wasn't even subtle about it.
It looked like Renji was just going to pretend it never happened. Ichigo should feel relieved, but he wasn't. It was like a thorn on his side, digging deeper and deeper into his flesh with each breath. He couldn't pretend the way Renji did, it just wasn't in his nature.
Ichigo thought he could catch Renji right as he was about to leave the class, but the redhead slipped out so quickly that Ichigo couldn't stop him without causing a scene in front of their classmates. So he could only grit his teeth and stare at Renji's back as the boy practically ran out of the room.
He could, technically, go over to Renji's house and ask to speak with him, but that would be awkward spelled in capital letters.
Ichigo was pretty sure that this wasn't the type of "looking" Renji's father had meant when he asked Ichigo to look out for his son.
By the time Saturday rolled along, Ichigo was ready to burst. There was simply no opening for him to talk to Renji at school. Whenever he tried to approach the guy, the redhead would pretend he didn't see him, didn't hear him, or simply just walk away.
Ichigo was sprawled comfortably on the couch when Yuzu and Karin walked into the living room. Yuzu was dressed in her nice "going out" clothes, and Karin, for once, wasn't wearing her baseball cap.
"Going out?" Ichigo asked, looking up lazily as he flipped to another TV channel.
"Ichi-nii! You forgot!" Yuzu said in exasperation.
Ichigo sat up, confused. "Forgot what?" It was Saturday, what could he possibly be forgetting?
And then it dawned on him—Saturday, six thirty in the evening. Dinner at Tsukabishi Tessai's house.
Shit.
Dinner at Renji's house.
Ichigo was torn. On one hand, it could be a good opportunity for him to talk to Renji. But on the other hand, he could not imagine talking to Renji about it with everyone around. His fate was sealed, however, when his father appeared in the living room. If he said he didn't want to go, he would be bombarded with a thousand questions, and that was the last thing he needed.
And so he trudged along the short distance between their houses with his family.
Renji's home was sparsely-decorated; they had all the necessities, but it was obvious that the house was occupied by men due to the lack of decorations like flowers and photos. Tessai had welcomed them warmly, and then promptly disappeared into the kitchen to make final preparations.
Renji was nowhere in sight.
Ichigo fiddled quietly with the silverware placed in front of him, trying to decide if he felt relieved or disappointed. A bit of both, he supposed. He realized that he didn't know what to expect; it was hard to imagine the redhead sitting at the table having dinner with them.
Then, right when Tessai began to bring out the dishes from the kitchen, Renji walked down the stairs. He was wearing a navy blue turtleneck, the long sleeves rolled up to his elbows. He gave his guests a brief glance—pointedly avoiding Ichigo's eyes, his face expressionless as always. Then, without a word, he went into the kitchen to help his father.
Dinner felt strange to Ichigo; all he could think of was how he could talk to Renji. The most awkward part about the meal was that Renji sat across from Ichigo. It was hard to avoid eye contact, given that the table wasn't all that wide, but they managed to do it anyway.
Nobody else seemed to detect the tension between the two boys, and for that Ichigo was glad.
Ichigo's opening finally came when Tessai began to clear away the empty dishes.
"I'll wash them," Renji said quietly.
"I'll help," Ichigo blurted out. The redhead's eyes immediately narrowed.
Tessai was completely oblivious to his son's change of expression. Sounding pleased, he said, "Thank you, Kurosaki-kun, I'll leave it to you boys! Come, come, Kurosaki-san, let me show you the CD collection of mine that I was telling you about."
Ichigo stood up and followed Renji into the kitchen while his dad and sisters followed Tessai into the living room. By the time he walked up to the sink, Renji was already rinsing the dirty dishes. Ichigo stood next to him, unsure how to begin.
After a long, very awkward silence, he finally said, "I'm sorry."
Renji stiffened.
He knew that Ichigo had been trying to talk to him over the past few days, and he had avoided the guy like the plague. He didn't want to talk about what happened. It wasn't like words could make any difference anyway. What could Ichigo do, apologize? That would just be stupid.
So when Ichigo really did apologize, Renji didn't know how to react.
"I was an ass, I'm sorry," Ichigo continued.
Renji remained silent, but he risked a sideways glance at his classmate. Ichigo's face was pink, and he was staring at the sink as if it was the most interesting thing in the world, but he looked determined. His voice didn't waver. Despite himself, Renji felt a surge of respect for the boy.
He probably wouldn't have the courage to do this. But then again, he wouldn't be a peeping tom in the first place.
"Whatever," he found himself saying.
Ichigo didn't respond immediately. Whether the guy was shocked that he had actually replied or he was simply too embarrassed to say anything, Renji wasn't sure. Almost ten agonizing seconds later, Ichigo finally said, "Thanks."
"Yeah, whatever," Renji mumbled. He continued to rinse the dishes, scrubbing occasionally to get the more stubborn stuff off the smooth surface. Then he reached out to place a plate into the dishwasher.
Ichigo intercepted the plate before it got there. "Let me help," he said.
Renji looked up and met those brown eyes. "Okay," he replied before turning back to grab the others.
One by one, Ichigo arranged the dishes in the dishwasher, and then Renji turned it on. The dishwasher began to hum loudly as water filled the machine, and they found themselves standing in the kitchen with nothing else to do. For a moment, the classmates stared at each other in silence.
"I won't tell anyone," Ichigo said suddenly.
Duh, of course you're not gonna tell people that you—
"The tattoos," Ichigo continued. "I won't tell anyone about them."
Taken by surprise, Renji automatically balled his hands into fists at the mention of the dreaded reminders of his past. His eyes narrowed dangerously.
Ichigo either didn't see his expression or was simply too nosy for his own good. "Why are you hiding?" he asked softly.
The question hit Renji like a slap, and he flinched visibly. It didn't make any sense, but he felt as though his clothes were abruptly taken from him, and he felt chilled to the bone. "It's none of your business," he hissed.
"I thought...maybe I can help," Ichigo mumbled. He averted his eyes for a second, and then his gaze returned, as if his eyes needed to take a break before he could continue looking at Renji.
Renji blinked. He felt his anger rising, but there was something in Ichigo's eyes that somehow kept that anger at bay. He blinked again. Damn it, this was the second time in less than an hour he didn't know how to react. "You can't," he said finally.
"I can try." Ichigo's eyes took on a stubborn gleam. "If you let me."
Renji felt like snorting. He felt like biting Ichigo's head off. He felt a lot of things. But instead, an idea occurred to him. It was a cruel idea, but it would serve the carrot-top right. He wanted to help so much, eh?
I'll show you that you've bitten off more than you could chew.
"Okay," Renji said. He stared intently into Ichigo's eyes.
"Okay?" The boy echoed, incredulous.
Renji allowed himself a smirk. "I'll let you."
"Really?" Ichigo's eyes widened, as if he couldn't believe what he'd just heard.
Renji cocked an eyebrow and shot his classmate a challenging look.
Ichigo hesitated, and then his lips curled up into a grin. "Deal."
To be continued...
Author's Note:
I'll be on the plane for the next few days, so updates might come a little slower than usual (my usual is once-a-day, so it's okay, right?).
Thanks in advance for your patience!