A/N: SORRY SORRY SORRY!!!!! I know I promised this chapter earlier but I got caught into family visits for Fourth of July and I forgot my laptop....I'm truly sorry! I hope I can be forgiven. -hopesshedoesntgetkilled; ___________

Twilight does not belong to me...yadda yadda....

And now without further ado; Chapter 3

BPOV

Edward Cullen.

Those two words were perfect to describe the male specimen that in the eyes of both my mother and Alice, as well as anyone that had any interest in my love life would now acquaint to being my 'boyfriend'. Surprisingly enough we had the same problem. I found that he didn't have anyone nor was he interested in anyone either. Our talk included his apology to what he did in the coffee shop and his reason why. After I explained why I asked him what I did - embarrassed enough after telling him how I thought he was an expert with his uhm…kissing methods - he said he was going to ask me the same. With his situation and all.

So someone must like me up there after all. My day and social life was safe - not to mention the bonus that still radiated at the edge of my lips. All I had left to do now was go and endure some 'quality time' with Alice and her ranting. I frowned at this thought. Alice had sounded livid on the phone earlier, more than usual when it came to the guys she dated. I contemplated calling her to ask her what was up but figured it would be best to get my answers in a public place. Somewhere where she wouldn't consider bodily harm in order to look good for the people around her. Nope. The stupidest thing someone can do is getting Alice pissed and this guy was obviously one of those idiots that were in so much demand by the skanky part of the female population.

I shook my head while continuing the 4 block trek to my apartment before going to the restaurant Alice had appointed to be our meeting place. I figured I could take a shower since I had skipped during my morning rage and maybe call my mother in order of telling her my news with Edward. She didn't know I 'had' a boyfriend like Alice did. And thankfully they never interacted with each other so I was clear in the lying department. The arrangement Edward and I formed consisted of telling the people that were most…pushy first and then be together for a month or so for appearances' sake. Then we would amicably 'break up' and remain friends for the duration of our time in college and then move on with our lives. Quick, easy, and unimportant. This was all business and I was so thankful for it. Then there was the case of Displays of Personal Affection. We were sketchy about that but eventually decided that it would only happen when the time was necessary so I didn't see a problem with that either.

As soon as I spotted my department I sighed happily and became hasty and angsty to get in before tripping on a step in the stairs. Of course. Suppressing the pain in my ankle I walked a little bit slower hoping I didn't injure it and pulled my key out. My sanctuary was just as I left it this morning and glancing at the clock I made calculations as to what my schedule was going to look like until Alice came to pick me up. It was 11:08A.M right now so I can't jump in the shower yet. Alice's call will probably take 5 minutes then she'll pick me up at around 5 minutes before noon…so I have about 30 minutes to shower and make sure my outfit was Alice-worthy. No wait, scratch that. Have less than 30 minutes to shower and pick and outfit then about 15 to talk to Renée. Just GREAT.

My internal groan became audible as soon as Alice's personal ringtone broke through the quiet ambience of my small living room. "Hey Alice." I really wanted to rush this call so that the argument with my mother would be much shorter than she would like.

"BELLA! Hey just wanted to check on our plans." Predictable much? "So I was thinking…after lunch we could go Downtown…then maybe to some stores. You know you need some more clothes. I have no clue how you survive on just jeans and shirts. I mean SERIOUSLY BELLA! I know I couldn't live without at least 15 pairs of my shoes or my shirts or my dresses or my skirts…" If I don't stop her soon she will never shut up and I will be forced to lock my self in my apartment with a loaded shotgun in fear of pixie.

"Alice," rambling, let's try again. "ALICE!" Quiet, thank God. "Alice I can't do anything tonight. I uh…have plans?" I had no clue where that came from but since I heard the intake of air from Alice I knew I had been wrong to hesitate. She would try to get me to 'cancel those plans.' "Yeah. Uhh I have dinner plans already." The words were ready to spill from her lips. I had to hang up soon. "I'll tell you at lunch. Remember you needed to talk too? Well this is…uh…big as well so I'll tell you then, okay?" The final words had come out more as a question but in my view were good enough to hang up. I knew she wouldn't call me until she was on her way or outside my apartment so I had to rush. I put calling Renée as my last thing and quickly jumped into a hot shower. I silently hoped that no one would disturb me while trying to relax and then remembered how little time I had.

I frowned and rushed through my routine while wondering how I was going to handle my mother. Our talk this morning hadn't ended in friendly terms and I was hesitant as to how to start the coming one. I knew I didn't have to apologize but I was sure she wanted one even though it was she who should be doing the apologizing. She was stubborn and childish. Nothing more than what she liked and I silently thanked whoever it had been that had set her up with her husband. Phil must have the patience of a saint in order to put up with my mother, but then again she did act different and more mature around him. I was also thankful that they had found each other prior to Phil's success in the field. I wouldn't have liked my mother being labeled as a goldigger in the tabloids. But that success was the one that brought here.

Sighing I stepped out of the shower and walked the short distance to my bedroom. I was thankful I didn't have that much clothes, though Alice hated that fact about me it made my life a lot more simpler. It was also comforting to know I didn't have to worry about stupid things such as what to wear like Alice did. I continued contemplating the fact while digging through my drawers and victoriously pulling out a pair of faded jeans and a red tank top. Lunch is nothing more than casual for me but I knew Alice would be wearing something expensive and 'in season'. My clothes was presentable enough and I didn't feel like rummaging anymore than necessary so I just hoped that Alice and her thoughts would be enough to stop her from saying anything about how I looked. Yeah, because that always happens. I snorted and looked at the clock frowning. Guess it's now or never.

So let's see, should we get ready for the screaming or the fainting? My mother is a bit…eccentric, and it can be a huge pain in the butt when it's not a funny consequence. I smiled briefly while awaiting for the little 'click' saying we were connected and hoped to god we I only had to get ready for the screaming. I didn't want my mother fainting on me when I wasn't there to soften the blow to the head she would surely get. Ahh genetics. So wonderful. You should be thankful it's thanks to that you can't go a day without unintentionally hurting yourself.

"Bella?" Crap. She answered. She wants me to talk. How should I start..? Oh shit! I never thought of a game plan. Nice going, Bella. Real smooth. "Isabella Marie if you don't start talking right now I WILL hang up this phone." She's still mad. Of course. She was the parent in this relationship. She could get mad without any reason at all. I wonder how that works. Is it just an age thing? A power thing? I wonder….

"Okay then. Goodbye."

"NO WAIT!" It would be just like me to start rambling mentally while on the phone about to drop a huge bomb on my mother. I wonder how is it that some people can live like this. Or am I just the only one… Stop it! "I'm…" I sighed. I should probably apologize then say goodbye and then subtly mention the fact? Yes, that would work. She wouldn't get so much in questioning me. I'll screen her calls until later, after lunch. That way she'll hopefully be a bit more calm. "I'm sorry, mom. For earlier. I was just in a bad mood. I hurt myself getting out of bed and getting my phone…you know how I am. I'm sorry for hurting your feelings?" The last bit came as a question. I was sure I didn't hurt her feelings. Just annoyed her but René will be René.

"Oh Bella," I sighed. Her voice was less harsh and a bit softer. I mentally did a victory dance. One less thing out of my conscience. My mother mad at me was something that I just couldn't stand for long. She was my mother after all. "I'm sorry too baby. I shouldn't have snapped at you like I did. But you know how I worry about you. And you're so far away…I feel like I need to know what's going on in your life so I can still be a part of it myself." I smiled. My mother was a child but she was also an adult. And she did have her 'deep wisdom' moments.

"It's okay mom. I was just a little overwhelmed since I had just woken up. I'll talk to you later okay? Alice is coming any minute to go get lunch together." Almost there. Hang in there, Bella. Your voice is coming out nervous. Breathe in, breathe out. Just one more minute and then you can hang up. It'll all be over soon. My mental chat was comforting though scary. I did have to tell her. I couldn't chicken out now.

"Okay baby. I'll talk to you later then. Tell your friend I say hi too." I could hear the smile on her voice. Picture it even. Now or never Bella, now or never.

"Bye mom. OH! And by the way, IhaveaboyfriendnowandIdidntwanttotellyouinthemorningbecause...yeah. Just thought I'd let you know. Okay. Got to go know!" I swiftly hung up the phone as I heard her intake of breath. Yup. Definitely the third degree later today.

I sighed as I heard he phone in my hand start ringing. I let it go to voice mail. I couldn't deal with my mother again just yet, and I had a pixie on my tail as well. The horn from her car wasn't any subtle and it was clearly meant for me to get my butt out of the place. The start of the questioning. Oh joy. This was surely going to be either interesting or my imminent death.

EPOV

It was completely unethical, and irrational, and completely asinine of me to do what I had just done but I sure as hell couldn't back out now. I had made a deal with a complete stranger to be my 'girlfriend' in front of people I cared about in order to deceive them and get them off my back. Asinine didn't even begin to describe me at the moment. I lounged around the living room of my apartment while going over the events of earlier and sighed. I wouldn't deny the girl was beautiful or a wonderful kisser but I still barely knew anything about her. I'd have to learn a whole shitload of things in order for this to work. That is what a boyfriend does after all, right? Giving gifts and being thoughtful also counted, right?

Fuck. I was so out of the loop with relationship stuff. I hadn't had a good relationship since high school and even that only happened a couple of times. I was shit at this and everyone knew it. Should I tell her this wouldn't work out after all? No. She needed this just like I did. I briefly pondered why she didn't have anyone but then came to the conclusion she had the same problem as I did. She probably didn't see anyone, just like I couldn't or probably ever would. But why couldn't she? I know why I did but surely she didn't have the same reasons. Not everyone had the same process - though they were fairly similar - and I was very interested in hers. Maybe we could become friends, though we would be forced to since this arrangement called for more than friendship at times. I couldn't exactly complain that fact, however. She was an excellent kisser and I found myself fantasizing doing so with her many more times to come.

Click Click. The vibrating motion and sounds from my phone pulled me from my reverie as I searched my pockets for it. It as a text message from Rosalie and I was sure it had something to do with Jasper, again. Something I could swear he was controlled by his dick. Edward can you go pick up Jasper from his 'girlfriend's' apartment. He forgot his key again and I won't be getting there until tomorrow so he's sleeping over at your place.

The request came out as a statement more than a question, though I'm sure it was never intended to be something to discuss. Rosalie was a tyrant but I never disputed her. Most of the time the things she made me do were for her brother and it showed she deeply cared for him. I wasn't lucky enough to have any siblings so I considered them both as such. After a couple of more texts with her and receiving and address as to where Jasper would be I headed out to my car and started making my way there. It wasn't far so I could drive at a leisurely pace and enjoy some of the familiar scenery of Hanover. It was just like any other town. The fact was both comforting and tedious. I was so used to this sort of views it made me ache for my parents vacation home in Forks. It wasn't like the city and I was greatly thankful for it. Though some people would disagree, smaller towns were better. They gave you peace and solitude, things I enjoyed quite thoroughly.

I looked around the streets in order to find the right location until I found my friend sitting on a nearby establishment sipping at a cup of white and green. I smirked. He's probably enjoying himself, I wonder how much fun he's going to have once we resume classes. I parked nearby and after getting something for myself I went over to him and awaited for him to start giving 'details' like he enjoyed doing so much of. I personally tuned them out, his descriptions were rather…unpleasing to hear. He was my best friend and I'd rather not hear of his escapades.

"You know, I think this is getting old." I frowned. What exactly could he mean by that? Was it me picking him up due to stupidity? Him talking about how far he went? "Stop fucking analyzing and let me finish talking." My frown became deeper. Something was up because he was never like this after a night of 'restless sleep'. "I meant that all of this….screwing is getting really old. I meant all of them are literally the same, and I don't feel like one night stands anymore, man. I want something….constant."

"You mean like a girlfriend?" I just had to hold in my laughter. It wasn't the moment for it, he was having a meaningful revelation and the topic was something I'd never thought would come from Jasper. He loved screwing around with every woman that had a skirt on and passed in front of him. It wasn't a secret everyone knew about it.

"Yeah, I guess. I'm just ready to give this all up. I need to give it all up. It's getting fucking annoying, you know. Like all of them keep calling me back and stuff. I just did it with them I didn't want to have any 'screwing' relationship shit with any of them but they think they do and it's getting frustrating. I really just want a girl that will satisfy my needs and BE there. Always. Just not with me for the fucking."

As he finished he frowned at his drink and I couldn't hold my laughter any longer. He looked at me as if I had several heads and I just shook my head. "You just sounded…seriously I never though-" I cleared my throat with some laughter left over and looked at him again trying to contain myself. "I'm sorry man, it's just that those words just came out of your mouth. And you're JASPER WHITLOCK. The number one fucker in Hanover. It's as if I'm in the Twilight Zone or something."

My laughter came out again and I could see some heads turning towards us but I couldn't help myself. I guess he saw my amusement as well and laughed himself but before long our fun died down and he became serious again. So this was actually true? I wonder what sparked that thought into his head.

"So, do you have anyone in mind?" It was possible a girl had started this for him. Maybe she wanted something more and he felt like he did too? He shook his head and I continued my questioning. "So then, what brought this on?" I saw him tense somewhat and I prepared for whatever it was he was going to say. It was obvious it was going to be important.

"The girl I was with last night. She had a boyfriend. And then it all came crashing down on me. Like this chick was cheating on the guy with...me. How would I feel if I had someone I cared about do something like that to me? Why would they do that to me? That's why I never wanted a relationship but now… I just want to make someone I deeply care about happy. I want them to be happy enough to not feel like doing that to me, and I want to feel wanted too. Not just sexually but…lovingly? Yeah, I guess that's it. Though I wouldn't give up the sex. I'd want to satisfy her and be satisfied myself. I want to be…just be."

He smiled ruefully at me and I myself felt somewhat moved. I always thought Jasper was commanded by his dick but apparently under it all he was just as lonely as I was, if not more. In a way we all were. It was comforting. The only one I ever felt like sharing my lonely thoughts was Rosalie but I guess Jasper was another person I could do that with. And if he understood then there was a chance I didn't have to fake a relationship…

"EDWARD! WHAT THE FUCK?!" I frowned and looked at Jasper. He was wearing a cocky smirk and had his hand in front of me. Apparently he had been trying to get my attention. "You just spaced out on me and shit. What the fuck where you thinking about? Didn't you just hear about how magnificent my night was? Or where you just imagining yourself in my place. Of course that wouldn't surprise me. You never seem to get any anyways, I wonder why…oh yeah. Because you're a prude."

I shook my head and looked around me. If I had just imagined what happened then I was definitely suffering from sleep deprivation or I needed to get checked into an institution. "I was just thinking about things. I didn't hear about your 'magnificent night', thank god. And can we go now. Your sister said she wouldn't be back until tomorrow so you have to stay over at my place."

"Fuck! I have to stay in the convent for a night. Damn Rosalie!" He grumbled as he stood and started making his way to my car. He knew my rules well and that meant no girls with him ever again. The last time was enough for my scarred mind. "Can I at least drive? Shit Edward your going to torture me for the night so at least let me drive."

"Yeah yeah." I tossed him my keys and got in myself before turning to the window and pondering over what I had just imagined. It rarely happened but I wonder why I came up with these situations in my mind. It was as if that's what I thought people were actually thinking about though they said completely opposite things. It was rare but when I did ask them they would tell me that I had been right.

I looked over at Jasper fiddling with the stereo and turning to a local radio station. I wonder….

My phone rang and I was momentarily pulled from my thoughts absentmindedly answering the apparatus. "Hey, uhm you're not busy or anything are you? Because I can call back later if you want me to?" The voice sounded familiar but I couldn't exactly pinpoint as to whose it was. Not many people had my number but even so I didn't make many calls with it. "I guess you are? Uhmm I'll call you back later?" "DON'T YOU DARE HANG UP THAT PHONE BELLA!" That voice was unfamiliar and it came from the background and I was still wondering who it was until it hit me. Isabella.

"No, I'm not busy. Sorry I kind of spaced for a minute." I chuckled to myself until I wondered why exactly she was calling. Did she want to call things off? Did she realize it was a stupid thing to do? Was her friend the one pushing her to do this?

"Oh, okay then." She paused and I waited for her to go on. I could hear the same voice talking animatedly and I wondered who it was. From my peripheral I could see Jasper had pulled over at my building and staring intently and curiously at me. I knew I'd had to tell him what it was about and I hoped to god things wouldn't change from the original plan because if they did then I'd be screwed and doomed to suffer at Jasper's taunting for the rest of eternity.

BPOV

"I was just wondering if we were still on for dinner tonight." KILL. ME. NOW. I had no idea as to what I was doing anymore. Alice had talked, gotten it all out of her system, critiqued my wardrobe, ate her salad, and when I thought she had forgot about dinner or shopping she surprised me by questioning me like I knew she would. So now I was on the phone with Edward Cullen asking him out when he was the one that had done the 'asking'. So much for being 'safe'.

"Dinner? That sounds good. At what time should I pick you up." Rejection. Yup I was going to get rejected on the first 'fake date' I ever had. Just like- He said yes? I was at a loss of words. Apparently this guy knew how to do that a lot to me. Is he a hypnotist or something? "Are you still there?"

"Oh uh yea." Real smart Bella. "Sorry uhm, 7:30ish or any time it's good for you. I don't have a problem, really." 'I don't have a problem'?! WHAT. THE. FUCK. I groaned internally at this. I was either mentally handicapped or a complete moron. I think it was both but now Alice was jumping up and down making a scene and begging for my phone. "Uh, my friend wants to talk to you is that okay?" I bit my lip. I felt like I was going to cry for some reason. This was definitely the weirdest day ever.

"Sure." He chuckled and I could swear it was the most beautiful sound I had ever heard. I passed the phone over to Alice and then internally cringed.

EPOV

I had been taken off-guard with the dinner thing but then thought it would be a good idea. I could get to know more about my 'girlfriend' and Jasper would have something to keep him quiet for the night. I wasn't sure I'd be able to live through another night of 'Edward's not getting some because he's a prude' talk with him. I knew he didn't really want to be an asshole and I knew he wasn't one but he was just plain irritating about the entire thing. And Rose wonders why I only talk to her about these sort of things…"ARE YOU REAL?!" This voice was high pitched and loud. I cringed from the phone and I was sure Jasper had heard the voice as well because he did the same. I could hear some sounds of deep breathing and the voice seemed to calm down slightly. I returned the phone to my ear, fearfully but hoping to hear the reason as to the question.

"Uhm yes? I believe that's why I'm able to talk and hold a phone." I chuckled and Jasper laughed as well. This was quite an amusing voice to be conversing with. He got out and headed upstairs while I continued my talk. I guess he decided I would debrief him later and explain my 'dinner plans' as well.

"I know that! I meant are you REALLY Bella's boyfriend or is she paying you? Oh my God! She's not giving you sex to fake it is she?! Because I swear if she is then I will KILL YOU! That sort of thing should not be done! What kind of person are you?! I mean serious-" "ALICE!!!!" Now that was Bella and I guessed the voice belonged to this Alice. I felt offended and amused while talking to her. She sounded very excited and exasperated at the same time.

"No she's not paying me." I paused and heard the intake of breath on the other end. "No we're not having sex." I heard air rushing out and became even more amused with this girl. She was very peculiar. "And yes I am her boyfriend."

"GET OUT OF HERE!" That was not a phrase I expected and I don't think my ears expected the loudness either. "SO YOU'RE SERIOUSLY TOGETHER?! OH MY GOD! I NEVER THOUGHT I'D SEE THE DAY!" Did she have that little fate in Isabella's ability to attain someone? "So you're going to dinner? Where? At what time are you picking her up?" Alice was rushing her words and I could barely make them out. I chuckled and realized I should be heading in, if I knew better I knew I should probably hide my Halo from Japer. God knows how he managed to find it 'broken' last time.

"I'll be calling her later with the details. I have to go now." I wondered about the details myself. Where would I take her. Damn I was rusty with date planning as well. I need to get back in the game. It's a good thing I was never bad in it to begin with. I just got rusty with the lack of 'trials'.

"Oh okay! I'll talk to you later then! Bye Edward!!!!!" I hung up my phone and shook my head smiling. This Alice would certainly be interesting in getting to know. She sounded like a child but apparently wasn't one and she was very protective of Bella from the sounds of it. Tonight would be interesting. But at the moment I was afraid I'd have to suffer a bit. I wasn't entirely sure I wanted to come out with my 'relationship' this soon. But I guess it was better than never and so I made the trek into my place and awaited for Jasper to begin drilling me for answers to the questions he definitely had. Sometimes he could be just like his sister, which reminded me…I'm definitely going to be killed for not telling her about this first. Shit.

How'd you like it? please tell me what you think. I want some reviews. -pouts; It might help me bring out chapter 4 faster. ;D