Disclaimer I don't own Inuyasha Rumiko Takahashi, and VIZ Media do, Rated R Lemon
It's thanksgiving time again and this year Kag's family and friends are celebrating it at the Taisho home. And the turkey day battle begins when Inuyasha starts a war with Inutaisho. Raunchy pranks are played, and hilarity breaks loose, written for thanksgiving 2011, lol, and happy thanksgiving everyone, complete one shot, Inu/Kag
Happy Turkey Day 3
By Raven 2010, Nov 23 2011
Turkey love, tug of war, a hanyou's hell
"As deranged as father is this is going to be good" Sesshoumaru thought "It is to be expected after little brother rigged fathers showerhead to only spray cold water"
It was a few days away from Thanksgiving all sat down at the dining hall table for dinner, on the middle of the table sat a large platter covered with a lid "Inuyasha will you do the honors? Sugimi asked
"Yeah sure what ever pops"
Inuyasha lifted the lid off of the platter, the second the lid was off a huge fat wide turkey leapt out, then landed on Inuyasha's lap "Gobble, gobble"
"Oh shit, a, a live turkey, no" Inuyasha stammered
"Gobble, gobble" it exclaimed, then pecked at Inuyasha's cheeks as if giving him turkey kisses
"Eek, get off you perverted bird" the hanyou protested
Inuyasha immediately got the bird off his lap, set it down on the floor, then turned to run and that's when the turkey grabbed the back of Inuyasha's pants pulling him back, Inuyasha pulled away again only to have the turkey repeat it's earlier actions. In his mind Inuyasha was trying to work out a plot, and gain a foolproof rout of escape, and he was almost getting a migraine from it while the relentless bird refused to let go
"Little brother perhaps you to should take that to the privacy of your room" Sesshoumaru suggested
"I ain't got nothing to take to the privacy of my room moron" Inuyasha bit "May be you should take it to your room, you know a little dog turkey love" he ragged
"No, I think not little brother that is your duty" Sesshoumaru replied
"Let go ya feathered creep" Inuyasha complained
"Aw, now Inuyasha be nice" Kagome teased
"Right after you get bent wench"
"Yeah be nice" the others added
"Kiss my sweet ass" Inuyasha wisecracked
The bird let go "Hey bird better watch out the mutt loves to eat your kind" Kouga said
"Kouga you fucking asshol" Inuyasha was cut off
He looked at the turkey who now had eyes glazed over with fury "Thanks a lot you stupid wolf look what you did now, and it just let go to"
"Your welcome dog breath, it's a pleasure to, and I'm more then happy to help" Kouga replied
"Uh oh" Inuyasha said as looked at the bird
Inuyasha turned and made to run, and that is when the turkey grabbed the back waistband on Inuyasha's pants pulling, for a while it was a tug of war between dog and turkey. Inuyasha had somehow managed to pull himself free and bolted but it did not last long because the vicious bird got hold of his pants again and showing almost demonic strength pulled them again only this time Inuyasha's pants were pulled all the way down to his ankles showing his male treasure to the world
"Eeeeeee, it's a giant worm" Kagome shrieked
"Oh, it's scary" Ayame said
"I, I'm scared, somebody kill it, please?" Kagura exclaimed, all three females were feigned fear
"Damn wenches it's not a worm, it's my joystick, and you leave him alone" Inuyasha defended
"Ooo Yashy can I pet it? Jakotsu teased
"Cut it off, cut it off" Miroku, Kouga, Sugimi, and Sesshoumaru chanted
"Traitors, dirty bastards" Inuyasha griped
He pulled away from the pesky fowl bird, but it hung on with a vice like grip, he ran still trying to escape the demon like bird, but wound up running with it still hanging on to his pants. The desperate hanyou tried diving in the pool thinking that the chlorine would make it release, but it failed, next he tried using his claws nothing
Next after setting it on the spin cycle the poor desperate hanyou got into the washing machine the turkey still did not let go, after the cycle ended he got out, then tried using the dryer it failed he exited the dryer. With the bird still attached the poor weary hanyou out of shear desperation tried taking a cold shower, and Inuyasha could almost swear he heard it giving a bird laugh
"Oh, I hate turkeys, I never want to see or eat one again as long as I live" he whined, and that is when it let go
"Gobble, gobble" it voiced, kicked Inuyasha in the ass, then left
"Hey, how was that turkey dog loving?" Kouga ragged
"I would be happy to help you choose an engagement, and wedding ring" Sugimi teased
"No nooky till the wedding night" Miroku razzed
"Yes, be gentle little brother, and do use lots of foreplay" Sesshoumaru needled
"Tender kisses help to, I could teach you how if you like" Jakotsu joked while applying cherry flavored lip balm on his lips
"Bend over and shove it hard and deep you stinking dicks" Inuyasha snapped then took off for parts unknown
Boom, coiled love, meet my snake
"You know with whatever Inuyasha is up to it'll be a miracle if he doesn't get himself killed" Miroku said
"Yes little brother is indeed suicidal, as well a being a fool" Sesshoumaru stated "Oh well we get free entertainment, father is one evil relentless dog when he has his mind set on revenge"
"Shit I can hardly wait for mutt face to fuck up, what will it be, I wonder?' Kouga commented
"Wish he'd hurry up and do it, the suspense is killing me" Jakotsu said
The sneaky hanyou know that it was his father was the one who set the turkey on him and was plotting revenge, first he had to think of the perfect thing to use, then it hit him and he smirked evilly. Sugimi went into the bathroom ready to relax, he pulled his pants down then sat on the toilet and that is when it happened, boom echoed throughout the house. The toilet exploded crumbling into a million pieces, and Sugimi landed flat on his ass, while ice cold water flooded over his lower half sending chills through his body
"Inuyasha bastard Taisho I will gut you for this" Sugimi bellowed
"Inuyasha bastard Taisho, he never calls Inuyasha by his full name unless he has true murderous intent" Sesshoumaru told them
"Dog breath what the hell did you do to your dad? It must be really rotten" Kouga said
"If you do not tell us soon I will kill you myself" Miroku promised
"Alright you pussies" Inuyasha replied, then told them
"Oh my dear sweet fucking gods" Kagura, Kagome, Ayame, and Kagura exclaimed
Next "Man up you little prick and fight like a man" soaking wet from the waist down Sugimi who had landed down onto the first floor bellowed "I am going to make a lamp out of you after I gut you like a fish"
"I'd be shaking in my boots if that threat wasn't coming from a girl" Inuyasha taunted "Hey pop tell me, how was that toilet dog love, I could help you pick out wedding and engagement rings"
"I am going to kill you" Sugimi promised
"Preach it to the choir, cause the congregation ain't hearing it" Inuyasha shot back
"Come to daddy pup he forgives you" Sugimi said sweetly
"No way old man" do I look like I was born five minutes ago? Inuyasha answered, then took off running at top speed, followed by his pissed of sire
"Exploding toilet only mutt face would come up with, and do something that sick" Kouga commented, and all broke out laughing
Three days passed and Sugimi was patiently waiting for opportunity to present itself, he had a real sick thing in mind for his rotten pup, Sesshoumaru dropped and kept a dead silence as they heard Sugimi in the basement. Then rattling and clanging was heard, they wordlessly gave each other curious and knowing looks, Sesshoumaru grinned sadistically, Kouga rubbed his hands in anticipation
Sugimi emerged from the basement smiling wickedly "Oh I love my pup, and my pup loves me, what a glorious day this is going to be" Sugimi sang
"Father what ungodly thing have you set in motion? Sesshoumaru asked
"Patience son patience, you will see soon enough, you will all love it I promise"
"And father is a dog of his word" Sesshoumaru stated
"Ah hah" The rest there agreed
"He is very near to receiving his gift" Sugimi said
Inuyasha stood shaft in hand in front of the toilet in his room ready to pee, in an instant he heard water splash, felt something leap up, land on and wrap around his rod, feeling that. The startled hanyou looked down, first he gulped, then his eyes went wide in horror, wrapped around his length was a multi colored striped snake, he gasped as the snake looked at and locked eyes with him, it was not letting go of it's new perch any time soon
"Hey that's not yours you gotta let go now" Inuyasha said "Come on dude get off"
"Hiss" was it's response as it remained coiled around his rod, with it's head resting on the head of his shaft as if lounging on a pillow, staring at him with beady eyes
"Oh you pain in my ass, let go. I'll get you a nice girl snake" he promised
"Hisssssss" the now enraged snake responded, darting it's tongue in and out of his mouth
"What the hells your problem? I only offered to get you a girl snake, wait a minute" he exclaimed, then lifted up it's tail end and looked "Oh now I see you're a girl, sorry didn't know that, okay then I'll get you a nice boy snake, just please let go, he's not a snake he's a dick?"
She only rubbed her head against his shaft "Hiss' but this time it was a gentle loving hiss
"Come on, what the fuck is taking him so long, I wanna see now?" Kouga griped
"Any time now" Sugimi said
"Yes it is closer then you think" Sesshoumaru added
"Daaad, come on ya old goat I know you did this" Inuyasha yelled
"I have no knowledge of what you speak of" Sugimi denied
"Bull shit now get this fucking thing off of me" now enraged Inuyasha demanded
"On him, what the hell is on him?" Jakotsu asked
"You shall soon see" Sugimi told him "Pup no need to use such foul language"
"Foul language my ass, now get up here and get this thing the fuck off of me"
"Clever father, piss him off and he'll run down here intent on killing you" Sesshoumaru said "Then we will at long last get to see it"
"Precisely" Sugimi answered
"I am tired, to tired to climb the stairs for trivial crap" Sugimi said baiting his enraged hot headed pup
"You dirty bastard I'll kill you for this shit, just wait till I get my claws on you, you old goat" Inuyasha promised
Forgetting his exposed situation in a flash Inuyasha was down on the first floor standing in front of his innocent looking father, all fell upon his form, then immediately went wide. Muffled snickers were heard, Inuyasha glared daggers while Sugimi held his face impassive, and maintained an unknowing what was going on look, which made it even funnier, even Sesshoumaru was having a difficult time keeping his stoic mask in place
"Inuyasha you need to calm down and tell me what it is that raises such concern in you" Sugimi said
"Oh bullshit like you don't know, you put that fucking thing in my toilet" Inuyasha bit
"Looks like love to m, me" laughing Kouga was finally able to speak
"What the fuck are you talking about, stupid wolf" Inuyasha replied
"How sweet coiled love" Jakotsu teased
"Yes just goes to show love comes in all forms, and among all species" Sesshoumaru added
"Shall I perform the marriage ceremony? Miroku ragged
"Oh wow look at the pretty colors" Ayame said
"Lovely, such devotion" Kagura joked
"What the hell are you bunch of idiots going on about? Inuyasha snapped "This is not funny"
"Well if you do not know, and have yet to realize then I shall not tell you" Sesshoumaru exclaimed
"Yes it is rather drafty" don't you agree? Sugimi said
"What, what the hell do you mean there's no draft in here" Inuyasha replied
"He is so numb" Kouga ragged
"Eat lead mangy wolf" Inuyasha snapped back, and felt the air hitting his bare skin, then it hit him his pants were still down showing all his bare rod with the happy snake coiled around it "Oh crap"
"Hehehe" the others were finally were able to release their held back laughter
"T, took you long enough" Sesshoumaru gasped
"You low life sons of bitches" Inuyasha snapped
"So romantic" Sugimi ragged
"I'll give you romantic you prick"
"Yes like you did with the exploding toilet" Sugimi retorted, Inuyasha was about to reply when he heard, and turned to look
"A snaking he did go, a snaking he did go yo ho ho a snaking he did go" Kagome teasingly sang
"Snaking he did go, hah wench?" Inuyasha said "I'll give you a snake you wont forget"
"Yeah a trouser snake" Jakotsu whispered to Sesshoumaru, the others heard and silently agreed
"Shit he is hung like a horse" Kagura commented after gasping
"Yes a Taisho family attribute" Sugimi proudly stated with a grin
"Sessh is taller, so that means he's even" Kagura couldn't finish
"Yes you are correct in your assumption" Sugimi replied
"Gasp, oh my gods" Kagura, and Ayame exclaimed
"Inu, Inuyasha you keep your distance" Kagome protested
"No can do" he replied as he stalked toward her "Don't be nervous I don't bite much" he successfully removed the snake, threw it at Sugimi, and quickly pulled his pants up
"Eep" Kagome exclaimed, then ran
"Don't run my little wenchy" Inuyasha teased while giving chase "Not to worry I have a nice snake for you"
"Ah crap"
"Inu just wants to show you his snake" he teased
While the affectionate snake perched with it's body draped around Sugimi's broad shoulders, and head resting on one shoulder "Yes my friend you rest, and thank you for your assistance" he said I have a reward for you" he then gave her raw meat which she eagerly swallowed
"You are a sick dog who I am happy to call father" Sesshoumaru said
"Thank you my son"
"All hail, and give worship to lord Sugimi lord and master of practical jokes" the group praised while bowing to him
"You spoil me" Sugimi teased
"Well father you get a time out, little brother will be to occupied to bother you for some time to come" Sesshoumaru stated
"If his pecker runs as much as his mouth does he may be gone for days" Kouga wisecracked
"Hallelujah" Sesshoumaru exclaimed
Lemon starts
It did not take Inuyasha long before he was in front of and captured his prey, Kagome's body jerked with a jolt when he did, swiftly Kagome was lifted off the ground, with his hands under her butt holding her up against the wall. Her panties had been sliced away so fast she hadn't even noticed, it was when she looked down she saw his pants were down around his ankles, she looked back up to see him smiling evilly while mischief danced in his golden eyes
"Inu" she started
"I promised you a snake, didn't I, and you know me I always keep my promises?"
"Gulp"
"Aw, my little wenchykins Inu will take good care of you" he teased, she loved it when he called her wench
Without warning and before she had chance to see it coming at the same time his lips were on hers in a strong demanding but loving kiss, and he slipped inside her popping her cherry. With a couple of gentle thrusts quickly she came, Kagome kept her arms around his neck and began pumping savagely more orgasms were hitting her hard, that pleased him immensely
As Kagome's breathing and heart rate rapidly increased, so did her savage thrusts up and down her hanyou's length. He was half insane with and lost in lust, so lost that he was aware of nothing but his miko taking great pleasure in him and enjoying his sexy muscular body, he enjoyed having her riding him, the harder he thrust up into her the more passionately she responded to him with a savageness that almost out did a female inu
Inuyasha pulled his lips from hers "Fuck, gods Kagome, shit the way you fuck me. Damn wench you could kill a guy"
"Y, you started it" she gasped in a teasing tone
"I really love you wench"
"Me to, and thanks for giving me the snake you promised me" she replied "Uh shit" she grunted when he thrust hard into her hitting a particular spot "Inuyasha f, feels good, don't stop more"
"Shit I, I'm gonna" he couldn't finish
It began "Gods yes Inuyasha"
"Kagome, gods damn Kagome" he exclaimed with the start of their climaxes
In a flash at the height of passion his fangs elongated and pierced the crook of her neck on the left side, and at the same time as she turned into a hanyouess she bit him in the same way. Inuyasha growled his conquest and mated status unbeknownst to him for all to hear, looking at Sesshoumaru Sugimi smirked. Powers merging, and flowing around them it sent the pair into another mating frenzy, and another set of explosive orgasms
Lemon ends
"It seems little brother has taken a mate" Sesshoumaru stated
"It is about time" Sugimi replied
"Yup the mutt finally realized that pussy has other uses, and got laid" Kouga joked
"Think he'll be able to walk after? Miroku teased
"Aw, our Yasha finally lost his cherry" the females said
Hours later the lovebirds were tired, hungry, and took a much needed break, they were headed to the kitchen when "Inuasha baby got his cherry tree chopped down now from virginity he is free" Miroku razzed
"Did it hurt? Kouga teased
"Need some novacane for your injured snake, little brother?" Sesshoumaru needled
"All it needs is a gentle massage" Jakotsu teased
"Hey our Inuyasha a plumber, who knew" Kagura added
"He's also a carpenter" Ayame said
"Carpenter? Playing along Sugimi inquired
"Yep, he's good at sawing wood for long, long periods of time"
"Gods, do you idiots ever shut up, and give it a rest?" Inuyasha said
"Nope" was they're reply
"Ohhh, why me? He moaned
"Come on snake lets go eat" Kagome teased, then smacked her mate across his butt
"Kagome" Inuyasha indignantly replied "Give me a break, will you?" They famished pair then headed to the kitchen