Okay so I finally had the time to write the next chapter in this story.

I don't really like how Rachel came out seeming really inconsiderate about Finn and his feelings, but I think that maybe she might have the right to feel this.

Other than that we obviously know I do not own anything but the plot soo yeaah.

I Hope you enjoy the story and please review :D

The thought of leaving Finn had never truly occurred to her until the day he had proposed. She knew that she was partly guilty to the pain that they both went through on a daily basis. It hurt her to know that she had lied to him and married him without love. She knew that he deserved so much more than she could or ever would offer him, but what was done was done. It seems a little callous of her to view their marriage as a mistake, as something that she would regret for the rest of her life, but she couldn't control her emotions. Maybe, she was selfish for regarding her pain as the only significant emotion in their relationship, but he had caused her so much more pain that she was causing him now. If she left Finn, she would be regarded as the treacherous woman that broke his heart. She couldn't deal with that, but she longed so much to run away from the prison that their marriage had become.

She had tried, she really had. She couldn't be happy with Finn at her side and she would never give him what he wanted out of their marriage. FInn had always wanted to have children and it was something that she was adamant about. She could not bring a child into a home where she would resent them for the rest of their life. She resented Finn for the simply act of giving here an ultimatum. She hated ever having compromised with him, she didn't want to marry him and be stuck in Lima for the rest of her life, but she had loved him then or she had at least believed she had. It took here 10 seconds to notice that her happiness never really belonged with Finn, especially not here in Ohio. She hated Ohio, she had worked her whole life to escape the black hole that was known as Lima, Ohio. God, she hated it here and she longed to escape, but she couldn't not now, not ever. She wouldn't be able to leave until the moment she spoke truthfully and honestly with Finn.

She loved him, but not the way they both wanted her to. She had spoken to Kurt about her feelings about 3 years ago and he had urged her that if she wasn't happy that she should simply end the marriage. She was amazed by the confession her husbands stepbrother had made, it was the last thing she had expected form Kurt, but he was always there to support whatever decision she made. It was moments like those when she would regret not leaving with Kurt to NYADA and leaving Finn far behind. She had longed for New York her whole life, she wanted to one day see her name in lights along Broadway and that day would come, she told herself that everyday for the past 10 years.

If only she had listened to Jesse, it was the only secret she had ever kept from Kurt. Jesse, had visited her the day they won Nationals 2012, he had told her that she should leave Finn, but she wouldn't listen. He had asked her for another chance, that if she ever did attend NYADA in the near future that maybe they should have dinner sometime. She had smiled at him, shook her head and told him that her attending NYADA was inevitability and that their meeting was as well. She regrets ever saying those words to him because, it was a silent promise that she had never kept. It killed her to think that she had risen his hopes once more. On a late night conversation with Kurt she had asked if he had ever bumped into Jesse and Kurt said he had. He said that Jesse had been doing well, an amazing actor that mostly did plays and not actual musical theater on Broadway. He had won 3 Tony's in the past 8 years he had been active. She was happy for him and told Kurt to tell him congratulations from her part. It was then that Kurt had told her the news of his engagement, she had wanted to here no more of the subject of Jesse St. James since that day, but it was rather impossible since Blaine, had become one of St. James best friends. At first, her reaction had puzzled her, she had asked herself why his engagement had wounded her so badly. She soon realized that his words exactly 8 years ago has settled somewhere deeply within her heart. Maybe she had not wanted to admit to herself that the previous year before Nationals when Jesse had come back for her had impacted her greatly, she had loved Jesse with all her heart 12 years ago, but she couldn't imagine that those feeling still lay there underneath. She struggled with the thought that she could still possibly love him for the longest time and it was when she realized that her love for him had never truly disappeared that she had begun the long journey of distancing herself from the man she hated to call her husband. She had a few days before decide that she would take on the task of asking Finn for a divorce because, honestly she simply could not live this way anymore. She would leave to New York the one place she had always longed to ever be, but it pained her to know that Jesse would not be there awaiting her. She would never have her fairytale ending as she had always hoped for since she was a child, but she had never truly been a conventional human being to begin with.

The things Kurt would never tell her were that Jesse never did get married and that he knew she loved him still. Loved him more than they could both ever truly realize, Rachel was blind or maybe just afraid, but love Jesse she did and Kurt had always know...

Thanks for reading and PLEASE REVIEW because, I write to attempt to entertain you readers and I need input. :D