Disclaimer: I own nothing! All these delightful characters and all that goes with them belong to the talented Stephenie Meyer.
Authors Note: Thanks for all the great reviews, alerts, and favorites. You guys make my day awesome! Continue to critique and I hope you are enjoying where the story is going. I'm sorry that this chapter isn't much longer than the last chapter... however, as I get farther into the story there will be a lot more going on to give chapters more length. These first few chapters just allow me to get into Bella and Edward's heads. :D
May 15th—Forks, Washington
EPOV
"And… I don't want to be the inexperienced chump who gets taken advantage of by some smooth talking city guy justbecauseI'mavirgin." Bella blurted out looking somehow pleased with herself and mortified at the same time. She then performed her classic finishing act by smacking herself on the forehead.
Wait… did she just insinuate what I think she just insinuated? Maybe it was a slip of the tongue. Tongue… Bella's tongue…
Images of Bella's pink tongue slithering across her lips in a playful fashion swiftly infiltrated my mind followed by images of Bella in various stages of undress making coherent thought very impossible. Not to mention my eyes, big as saucers, were now glued to her chest where the proof of her womanhood was most evident. Her breasts were straining against her fitted t-shirt so prettily that I was loath to ever look anywhere else ever again.
Damnit Edward! Snap out of it man! Get your mind out of the gutter, that's not what she meant. Plus she's your best friend. Best friends don't think of best friends naked, or in tempting baby blue teddies. Oh god. This is not good. Not good at all.
When I was able to breathe again, and after reciting the pledge of allegiance three times in my head I was able to successfully get out a coherent response.
"Wait. Your plan for this summer… Tell me it's not what I think it is." I pleaded, hoping… no praying vainly that I had misinterpreted her previous announcement.
She smirked, and said, "Well, if you're thinking my plan is to lose the aforementioned virginity at some point this summer… then I think we're on the same page."
My breathing became labored as I was once again assaulted with a barrage of a naked and very sexy Bella. I closed my eyes and pinched the bridge of my nose, trying to calm myself down so that I might talk her out of this terrible, terrible idea.
For the life of me I couldn't look at her. I would just end up staring at her exquisite heart-shaped face, or those full pouty lips, or her perfect chest. I seemed to be torn into two very different people, Edward, 'the best friend' and Edward, 'the man.' Both of whom were waging their own battles inside of me at the moment.
Is it really such a terrible idea?
Of course it is; she's your best friend!
But she's your amazingly gorgeous best friend.
But best friends don't lust after each other… that's lust friends not best friends.
This is just getting absurd... Did I just say lust friends?
I'm losing my mind!
As the silent battle was being waged and the battle lines were being drawn another thought occurred to me. A thought more disturbing that my sudden rampant lust for Bella.
Did she already have some guy picked out? Some guy who would bed her and make her another notch on his victory belt?
The thought made me sick, and successfully squelched the lustful thoughts that had been parading in my head for the past few moments. However now there was a large part of me that wanted to throttle every guy I came across. I just couldn't stop thinking about some faceless man kissing Bella. Stroking Bella. Making love to Bella. I was so ate up with the thought that I couldn't stop myself from asking… I couldn't stop myself from asking the one question that I HAD to know the answer to, but for the life of me did not want to know.
"Who?" I asked, still unwilling to open my eyes. The pressure on the bridge of my nose was soothing but did little help in harnessing the turbulent emotions that threatened my composure. I inhaled slowly, held it, and let it out even more slowly. After three deep breathes and still no reply from Bella I couldn't stamp out the burning in my chest.
"I asked, who, damnit!" The rawness of my own words shocked me and immediately Edward, 'the best friend' wanted to grovel for forgiveness. However, Edward, 'the man' demanded the satisfaction that an answer would bring.
"What are you talking about Edward?" her words infiltrated my silent war and gave me something to cling to. The confusion and hurt that tinged her voice made me immediately repentant and helped me gain some control over the dangerous thoughts that filled my mind.
"Who were you planning on… helping you?" I asked, hoping that my voice seemed less harsh and more conversational.
"Oh. Uhm. I'm not actually sure yet. I was, uhm, hoping… maybe you could me pick someone?" she managed to stutter out in her silky sweet voice. Relief washed over me and the burning in my chest dissipated. But as always with Bella a new and unexpected twist made my heart wrench painfully. I couldn't keep the hurt out of my eyes as I ripped them open to stare at her in disbelief.
She wanted me to help her find someone to have sex with her?
This is wrong. I can't do this.
Why would she ask me to do this? Is she trying to kill me?
The thoughts that assaulted my mind as well as my heart were interrupted by Bella in her rush to explain herself.
"You see Edward, I don't know any of the guys in Forks half as well as you do. I need a guy's perspective on who would best fit my purpose. I don't want to be hurt Edward. And I know that when you think this through, you don't want me getting hurt either. Not when you could have prevented it. "
As she spoke, I attempted to take in every aesthetic that was uniquely Bella. As my mind wrapped around her words my eyes caressed the mahogany tresses that fell over her face, her perfect, ivory skin that almost seemed to sparkle in the sun and her eyes… they were wide orbs of liquid chocolate fringed with thick lashes that seemed to be as deep as the caverns of the sea. They mirrored her every emotion and always managed to make me a little weak. She was beautiful, no doubt about it. How the hell I had ever gotten through 22 years without realizing just how breathtaking she really is was beyond me.
I mean, I'd always known that she was pretty. But I grew up with her, and I always saw the quiet beauty that she was but never had been as sexually aware of her femininity as I was right now. The sexual lure that was radiating off her was like ambrosia, intoxicating and delicious. I realized that I would probably never be able to look at Bella the same way again, something was irrevocably changed.
And the more I thought of Bella having sex, the more I hated the idea of her having sex with anyone. Maybe it is because she's been mine for so long. We've always been close, never letting people get in-between. In retrospect this might be why neither of us has had a lasting relationship with any of our previous flames.
Her she is, bearing her soul desire to me and she expects me to help her. Correction. She expects me to help her find someone to help her.
Okay. Gameplan. Stall her until I can come up with a better game plan. Nice plan Cullen. I mentally patted myself on the back. But another part of me was questioning my motives.
Am I doing this for her own good, or am I doing this to satisfy my own selfishness. I asked myself as I looked up and became ensnared in her chocolate gaze.
An exuberant smile spread across her face as she launched herself at me, effectively knocking me over. She landed on my chest with her face buried in-between my neck and collar. Her soft curves pressed into my hard planes. It felt right. I closed my eyes, holding her to my chest… slowly breathing in her strawberry scented hair.
"Edward?"
"Hmm?"
She raised her head from the crook of my neck and her eyes sparkled prettily. A soft pink blush flushed her cheeks. The air caught in my lungs. She was indeed breathtaking. My own personal earthbound angel.
"Thanks."