Sup, my X over fans? You miss me?
Sorry about the long time update, cuz I've been doing this one chapter for about a week cuz I've been stuck one one of the 5-item intervals.
This chapter is where we actually start doing the list! This is where the REAL fun begins!
Or it might turn out very boring and bland, and end up being like very other '333 ways to get kicked out' fanfic you've read. But hopefully not, because some epic stuff happens here!
How this is going to work (I will include this recap at the start of every chapter):
There are 2 Wal-Marts. Each day, two of them go and do their list in one of the stores (exceptions explained later). Each day, a different combination of them goes together in one store. This should make it interesting. Other than those details, it'll probably be pretty much like every other "333 ways to get kicked out" fanfic you've read.
Also, a heads up for you. Melvin and Ryou appear in this too. Unfortunately, and let me say that I'm not a cruel author and I am very anti-deathshipping *shudders*, they WILL appear together in the same scene at some point. I hate when that happens, but it will so we all have to deal with it.
I have this cool "notes" thing that's a post-it or a piece of paper with a note on it for someone else, but it looks really cool the way I did it. I have a music notes thing for the points when someone sings. I made up email addresses for them. But they aren't real so don't try them.
The list is done in 20's. Everyday, they do 20 of the things on the list, so the chapters might be a bit long. And it goes in intervals of 5, 10, or 20, depending on who is where and how the chapter goes. And a new thing happens at each 100 mark.
I will note which number is being done in the line before they start it. Or I will have them remember their number thing. Both will be tried, and whichever one works is how I will continue it. The items on the list are separated by a double-enter, so it should be easy to tell where each event starts and ends.
For the most part, it is told from the POV of England or Bakura when not in the store, and by whoever is doing the current item on the list when they are.
As one pair does a set of items, the other pair is doing the same set at the same time.
Certain items will either be skipped or done by a Steve. Some of the skipped items will be done in a group of 4 instead of 2. Those items will be saved for when the four of them are in the same store.
Last we left off, Marik and America had an epic double-fail when they dragged the wrong person into the wrong Wal-Mart. But then they all agreed to it anyway. (Which is good because Marik and Bakura stupidly forgot to bring a pen to cross stuff off with which is also a fail.)
Let's check up on them, shall we?
ENJOY~!
"So," Bakura said to Alfred. "Let me show you which ones I'm doing."
"Hey, no fair! I wanna pick too!"
"Nope! My list, my rules. Let's see here..."
In the other Wal-Mart, Marik and England were doing the same thing.
"So you know which ones you're doing, right?" England asked Marik.
"Yes, I remember."
"Well let me go over it again because you won't have the list with you..."
When everyone was done discussing stuff, they parted ways from the other person and went to start on their share of the first 20 items on the list.
~In the left Wal-Mart with America and Bakura~
"1. Take someone's shopping cart and switch the items with stuff from the person next to them's cart." All I need to do is to find two people and switch the items in their carts, Bakura thought. How difficult could that be? This list is starting out very boring and easy.
He walked around for a few minutes before finding two people, a man and a woman, who were on opposite sides of an aisle. The types of items in their carts were very different. The woman had items that implied she had kids and was shopping for them. Her purse was on her cart. On the other hand, the man had more industrial stuff, more hardware and stuff like that. His sweater was hanging from his cart.
Bakura didn't really want to deal with the moving of the items in the carts, but then he got a better and much more convenient idea. Both were entirely engrossed in the items on the shelves. He took the carts themselves and quickly switched their positions. He switched the purse and sweater and positioned them exactly right. Then he walked to the end of the aisle to watch the outcome.
When the woman and the man turned around, they took one look at their own and the other's carts and started arguing with each other, calling each other a thief and stuff like that.
Bakura chuckled a bit at the sight, but was still bored with the list thus far, and walked away.
.
2. Walk up to complete strangers and say, "Hi! I haven't seen you in so long!…" etc. See if they play along to avoid embarrassment
As soon as Bakura was out of sight, America went to find a person to try his first item with. He soon spotted a random guy who had just left checkout. Perfect, he thought as he ran up to him.
America stood right in his path and pretended not to notice him. The young man stared at him, wondering when he was going to move. Finally he asked "May I help you?"
America turned and faked surprise. "Oh my gosh! Joey! Is that you?!"
The guy looked confused. "What the hell are you talking about?" he asked. "I'm Ricky. Who the hell are you?"
"Joey! HI! I haven't seen you in so long! How's life been going? How is... she?"
"Look, man. I don't know what your problem is. Just get out of my way."
"Dude! It's me, Alfie! I havent seen you in years since college! Seriously how's that girl you told me about?"
The young man sighed and facepalmed. "Look, pal. I don't know what you're trying to do, but it's not working. I don't know you and you don't know me. I'm leaving now. Bye." And with that,. he quickly ran around America and left the store.
America watched him leave, disappointed and surprised.
"Well that was a boring failure," he said aloud as he went off to do the next one.
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3. Smash the person in front of you on the head with a ham
Bakura went into the food section and looked at the meat. He was looking for the perfect sized ham to smash on someones head with. His eye passed over the steaks and he resisted the urge to steal them right then and there. The he found te perfect sized ham. "Perfect!" he said as he picked it up.
He walked around the aisles, looking for someone to smash with it. Then he found his choice: a guy who was staring at jars of peanut butter. He was completely unaware that Bakura was there.
Bakura snuck up to him and prepared to strike. At the last possible second, the man turned around to face him and got a face full of ham.
"Argh!" he screamed as he bumped into the shelf, causing some peanut butter jars to fall on this head.
Bakura laughed at the sight, but stopped when he felt something hit the ham in his hand. He looked down and saw a jar of peanut butter on he floor. He looked over at the man. He had two more jars, one in each hand, and was staring at him angrily. Bakura didn't feel threatened, and just dropped the ham and walked away.
Then he felt another jar hit him in the back. "What the bugger?" he asked aloud.
"Your turn!" he screamed as he picked up the ham, chucked it at Bakura's face, and then picked up two more jars.
Bakura dodged the ham. When the guy threw a jar at his face again, he just put his head down. The jar somehow bounced off his hair and was aimed back at the man. It hit him right in the stomach and he went down.
Bakura looked at him. He smiled. "That's what you get for messing with Florence, you wanker." He was about to walk away when he had an evil idea. He opened one of the peanut butter jars, put 'something' inside it, and then found the man's basket and put it inside. Then he walked away to do the next item for him.
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Number four, go up to some old geezer and say "Grandpa! You're ALIVE! It's a MIRACLE! etc."
America walked around for a few minutes until he found an old fat man with a white beard wearing summer clothes with hibiscus floral patterns in them. "Perfect!" he said as he walked up to the man.
America put an arm around his shoulder and yelled "Grandpa! You're alive after all these years! It's a miracle! Where have you been?"
The old man looked at him with wise eyes. "Same place I've always been! Now which grandchild are you?"
"Its me, Pops! Alfred."
"Ah yes," the old man said, adjusting his glasses. "Alfred F. Jones, correct?"
"Whoa... Um yeah." 'How did he know my name?'
"Just letting you know that Finland wont be taking over for me this year. I've had my winter vacation and now I'm back! Be a good boy! See you around!" The old man walked away.
America stood there in confusion. After a few seconds, he said, "What a weirdo..." and walked away to do the next item.
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5. Take something from someone else's cart, when they say "hey, that's mine! " call the security and say that the other … person was trying to take your __
Bakura stood and looked around for the nearest person with something to steal in their cart. He saw a teenage girl exiting one of the toy aisles. He smiled evilly. He snuck up to her. When she turned her back on the cart to look at something, he stole a random item and stood there with it.
She turned around and glanced at him. Then she saw the item in his hands. "Hey!" she yelled. "That's mine! Give it back, you thief!" She reached over to the front of the cart, trying to grab it back.
"Security!" Bakura shouted.
A security guard came right over. "What seems to be the problem?" he asked.
"This little girl is trying to take my puzzle from me," Bakura said, holding up the puzzle box with a pyramid on it.
The girl looked at Bakura in shock. "Wait a minute. Pyramid? Puzzle? Thief? Accent?"
Bakura looked at her in worry. 'This better not be a-'
"Are you Baku-"
Bakura threw the item at the girl's face and took off at top speed. That was a close one. I don't want to run into any fangirls unless we're at the convention. And even then I still don't want to.
He walked looked back. The two were far away on the other side of the store, and he was out of their line of sight. Hmph.
He walked away and went to find Alfred, who had the list on him.
~In the right Wal-Mart, with England and Marik~
6. Move "Caution: Wet Floor" signs to carpeted areas.
England walked through the store, looking for a 'Caution: Wet Floor' sign. Unfortunately, there weren't any. "Well I guess I'll have to make one appear..." he said aloud.
He found a vase with a bouquet in it that was filled with water. He walked up to it and 'accidentally' knocked it over. Then he pretended to slip in the water. "Oh my gosh!" he yelled in fake surprise as he fell forward and caught himself before hitting the floor.
An nearby employee noticed and ran right over. "Sir, are you okay?" he asked while helping England up.
"No, I'm not bloody okay! I slipped on some water! You should really put a 'Wet Floor' sign here!"
"But sir, I saw you knock the vase down just now..."
"Where's that sign?!"
"I got it!" said a janitor who was walking towards them. He had a mop and a 'Caution: Wet Floor' sign with him. He mopped up the water as best as he could and then placed the sign.
The task was done, and the janitor walked off. England began to walk away and said quickly, "Okay thanks, bye!"
The employee stared after him weirdly, then walked away. When he was sure the man was gone, he ran back and stole the sign.
England walked over to a carpeted section near the front of the store and propped the sign up. He then walked away to start the next item of the list.
As he walked, he passed the same spot that he had taken the sign from. A young woman had slipped on the wet floor. Feeling bad for her, England went over and held out a hand to help her up. She accepted the hand and thanked him.
"You should really complain to them about their lack of 'Wet Floor' signs," he told her, stifling back a laugh. Then he walked away for real.
.
Marik went into the clothes section and looked around for a clothes circle he wanted to hide inside. Then he saw some costumes and decided to hide in there. He looked around to make sure he wasn't being watched and then slipped inside. He looked around and waited for someone to show up near him.
No one did for about five minutes. Why the frig isn't anyone here? he wondered. Maybe I picked the wrong circle? He didn't have the list so he wasn't sure.
He was about to go find a different place to hide when he saw someone approaching him. Yeeeessss.
As the person reached a hand out towards a Batman costume, he jumped out and shouted "AIHAIHAIHAIHAIHAIHAIHAHAHAHA HAAAAA!"
"AAHH!" England shouted as he jumped back in shock and bumped into another clothes rack. When he saw who had jumped out at him, he became annoyed. "Marik, you wanker! You're supposed to do it to the shoppers, not me! And you're supposed to be where the shirts are! Didn't you read the list right? Number 7 says 'Hide in the center of the clothes circle where people find shirts,' the bloody shirts, 'and jump out and yell "AIHAIHAIHAIHAIHAIHAIHAHAHAHA HAAAAA!"'"
"Excuse me for trying to make this original. Sorreeee~. What are you doing here anyway?"
"Getting a Batman costume for my next item on the list. 'Number 9'," he quoted. "'Get a Batman costume, out it on, and run around the store screaming at the top of your lungs, "COME ROBIN! TO THE BATMOBILE!"'"
"Oh oh oh oh oh! Can I do it too? I can be Robin!"
England didn't want Marik following him around the store. "No, you can't," he said as he picked out the costume.
"Well can I be the Joker? I'm practically a sexy version of the Joker."
"You're not the Joker."
"That's exactly what Bakura told me but you're both wrong!" Marik said as he exited the clothes circle.
"Whatever," England said. He turned away and walked towards the dressing room, Marik following behind him.
.
A few feet away from the dressing room, England turned around and yelled at Marik, "Why are you following me?!"
"Cuz my next item on the list is in the dressing room."
Oh right. Number 8. Go into the dressing room, wait a few minutes, then yell "THERES NO TOILET PAPER IN HERE!"
"Okay then," England said as they both entered.
A few minutes later, England had his costume on. However, he waited for Marik to do his number so he could get a diversion. A minute later, Marik ran out of his stall screaming, "Theres no [EFF!]ing toilet paper in here!" he ran just to the left of the entrance to the dressing rooms. England noticed several people staring at Marik, so he used that chance to escape.
.
9. Get a batman costume, put it on, and run around the store screaming at the top of your lungs, "COME ROBIN! TO THE BATMOBILE!"
England hid behind a bed in the furniture department untill the time was right. Then, when people were around, he jumped out and yelled "COME ROBIN! TO THE BATMOBILE!" He then proceeded to run up and down the aisles. About two minutes later, he looked behind him and noticed a little boy who looked to be about 10 years old following him. "Who are you?" He asked.
"My name is Robin," the little boy answered. "And I am also Robin! Batman, are we at the Batmobile yet? I'm getting tired."
England stopped running and the little boy stopped as well. They looked at each other. Hoping that he wouldn't hurt the boy's feelings, England said to him, "Listen, I'm not really Batman. Just run away from me so people won't think you're with me. Trust me, you don't want to be around when this thing backfires."
"You're doing the Triple-Three List aren't you?" Robin asked. "Number nine?"
England assumed that 'Triple-Three List' meant the 333 ways to get kicked out, so he answered, "Yes, I am but I wish I wasn't."
Robin winked at him. "If you ever need any help or back-up on the list, let me know." And with that, he walked away, shouting "Let's go Batman! Gotham City needs us!"
England smiled as he watched him leave. "Well I guess that was useful," he said as he sneaked back to the dressing room to change out of his ridiculous costume.
.
After doing number 8, Marik quickly ran back to the clothing section to do number 10, which was 'Hide between clothing and then jump out and yell "PICK ME"'.
He did this, and jumped out several times, scaring two mothers, the guy that he had smashed in the head with a ham, one child, and a teenage girl.
The teenage girl actually stood there for a few moments, actually considering him. But then she scoffed at him and said, "No. You're not my type," walking away as she said it.
"Wait! Come back! What type?! The sexy type?! But I aaaaaaammmmmmm! Why nooootttttt?"
Humph...
Then, his mood now messed up for some random reason, he came out completely and stormed off to do the next item.
~Back to America and Bakura~
Alfred was probably doing number 10 or 14 at the moment. Bakura didn't hear any music or notice people holding their ears in pain, so he assumed 14 wasn't being done yet. This gave him about seven minutes to do his next three tasks.
"11. When someone asks if you need help, begin to cry and ask, 'Why won't you people just leave me alone?'" This one should be fun, Bakura thought as he walked through the aisles. He came across one aisle with an employee in it.
He entered the aisle and began looking at stuff. Then he pretended to look frustrated and confused. After a minute, the employee walked next to him.
"Excuse me," he asked. "Do you need help looking for something? You seem to be having trouble."
Bakura turned to him and put on an irritated and scary face. The employee flinched at the sight of it. "Why can't you people just leave me alone! I don't need your bloody help! Get away from me!"
The employee screamed in terror and ran away as fast as he could.
Bakura smiled evilly, obviously enjoying the reaction.
.
13. Hide in a clothes circle. When someone with a shopping cart goes by stick your hand out and steal something from them.
Bakura was looking forward to number 13. It involved stealing stuff from people, which he was good at and didn't get to do all day.
He walked into the clothing section and looked around. He didn't see any sign of Alfred, which was odd because the items he would be doing around this time involved being there. However, he could just be doing a different item or preparing for the next one or something like that.
Bakura casually walked up to one of the clothes circles, looked around to make sure he wasn't being watched, then darted inside.
Then he waited.
Within a few seconds, someone passed by with a cart. Bakura quickly and stealthily stuck out a hand and grabbed something from the cart, pulling it inside the circle.
It was kinda darkish, so he couldn't see what it was, but he was sure it was clothing.
He did this several times more in the next two minutes, and he acquired a lot of stuff, which he planned to leave there. He had stolen three items of clothing, a dog toy, a plastic baseball bat, two books, and a box of cereal.
He exited the circle, leaving the items there for their owners to go crazy looking for. As he left the department he noticed what seemed to be one of these people. He was muttering something about his cereal and how he wouldn't get to lower his cholesterol.
Bakura internally laughed at him, hoping he wouldn't find it or be smart enough to go get another box.
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"15. Randomly place 24 bags of candy in peoples carts." Again, easy. Bakura got a basket and filled it with several bags of candy. Then he walked inconspicuously through the store. As he walked, he put two dozen bags of candy in people's carts who weren't paying attention.
When his basket was empty, he tossed it aside, causing a person to trip over it. He went over to the checkout stands and casually stood there, watching. Within five minutes, some of the people he had given candy had arrived. They looked at their carts in shock when they realized that they had somehow come into possession of several candy bags, and had to walk back to the candy aisle to return them. Bakura laughed at their stupidity and lack of observation.
Then, one person actually let all 24 bags of candy get scanned with his items. When he saw the total, he freaked out and started an argument with the cashier about how he didn't actually want the candy and that the cashier should take off the total and start over and blah blah blah...
Bakura laughed more as he walked away from the scene. Just before he was able to, he felt something being thrown at him. It wasn't a jar of peanut butter again (thinking about that made him laugh at what he had put inside the jar), it was a bag of candy.
The man who had been arguing with the cashier had thrown one at him.
Bakura threw it back and ran away.
Well that was amusing, he admitted to himself. This list is turning out better than I thought.
He couldn't wait until the peanut-butter-guy went home.
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He started looking for Alfred so they could do one together. As he searched, he noticed several people covering or rubbing their ears, muttering about music. Then he heard the sounds of guitar playing coming from the direction those people were walking away from.
Bakura assumed that both of those things were because of Alfred, and ran towards the music.
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As he walked away from the clothes, America tried to remember the lyrics for Wake Me Up When September Ends, because number 14, his current task, was "Grab a guitar and start singing Wake Me Up When September Ends in a loud shrieking half screaming voice"
That was going to be difficult-ish. America had a pretty good singing voice, and great guitar skills, but he could manage it somehow.
He went over so the music section, stole a CD and a portable CD player, listened to the song once to remember the lyrics, then grabbed a guitar and headed for a busy part of the store.
He decided to go for the clothing section again. America moved two mannequins off of their platform, positioned them around it, and got up on the platform himself. A few customers looked over at him to see what he was doing, but turned away and ignored him.
"Ahem." He cleared this throat. People within a five foot radius looked over at him, but turned away again. He struck a chord with the guitar, and people played closer attention.
Then he began to play.
He played the melody perfectly, and people swayed to they rhythm.
Then he began to sing.
Horribly.
o/` o/` o/` o/` o/` o/` o/` o/`
Summer has come and passed
The innocent can never last
Wake me up when September ends
Like my father's come to pass
Seven years has gone so fast
Wake me up when September ends
o/` o/` o/` o/` o/` o/` o/` o/`
Some of the people within a ten foot radius started cheering, obviously only hearing the guitar.
Some of them covered their ears in pain and left the clothing section, obviously hearing the vocals.
o/` o/` o/` o/` o/` o/` o/` o/`
Here comes the rain again
Falling from the stars
Drenched in my pain again
Becoming who we are
As my memory rests
But never forgets what I lost
Wake me up when September ends
...
o/` o/` o/` o/` o/` o/` o/` o/`
When America was done, he looked around. Half the people standing within earshot were covering their ears and bent over in pain. The other half were cheering and clapping. There was even some money on the floor.
He stood up to his full height, took a big bow, then put the guitar down. He looked around and waved at everyone, saying, "Thank you!" and stuff. As he looked at everyone, he noticed Bakura standing five aisles away, looking at him. When they made eye contact, Bakura motioned him into the aisle and then entered it.
Assuming that was a signal to meet him there, America began to leave. "Thank you everyone! Keep the money, I work for free! I'll be here all week thank you and good night!" he said to the people, and he ran off.
.
America ran into the aisle that Bakura had disappeared into. He found Bakura leaning against the shelves about halfway in and walked up to him. "Ok, what's up, man?"
Bakura pulled out the list from his pocket. He crossed off the item Alfred had just done, number 14, and then indicated number 12.
"'Twelve'," Alfred read aloud. "'Take up an entire aisle in Toys by setting up a full-scale battlefield with G.I. Joes vs. the X-Men'. Oh were you waiting all this time just for me? What, you didn't want to do it yourself?"
Bakura scoffed. "Of course not. Numbers 11 and 13 only took two minutes each. And I did number 15 while you were doing your song, which took much too long, by the way."
"Speaking of my song, how did I do?" Alfred asked enthusiastically.
"Horrible, exactly how you were supposed to do. Now, let's get going so we can get this over with. And no, I don't want to do it by myself. That way, if anyone asks, I did it so I could keep you from crying about it."
"But I wouldn't-"
"It's called pretending. I didn't say that you actually would cry about it." But you probably would if I didn't agree to this. "Now let's go," Bakura said for a second time.
They arrived in the toys section. Bakura sent Alfred to get the G. I. Joe stuff, while he got the X-Men stuff. Secretly, he actually watched the X-Men, and knew what he was doing.
Similarly, America knew stuff about G.I. Joe stuff.
The two met up in one of the toy aisles and began to set up.
The two battled for five minutes, being totally in character.
Suddenly, a little kid ran through the aisle, purposely knocking down some stuff.
As their battle was ended abruptly, America and Bakura snapped out of their in-character state, and looked around confusedly.
"Uh..." America spoke first. "So I guess we got that over with, finally... That was getting kinda boring..."
"Yes... I agree... I'm glad that's over..."
.
They stood up and began to put the toys away, but Bakura stopped Alfred. "Let's not," he suggested. "More chaos and distraction."
"Good idea!" Alfred agreed.
"So, I'm off to numbers 17 and 19," Bakura said to him. "When you're done with 16 and 18, meet me near the exit to decide if we want to do 20."
"Sounds like a plan!" America said.
The two ran off in different directions.
~Back to Marik and England~
Despite Marik messing up a few of them (some how), things were going pretty good for the two of them.
England reviewed the list briefly to check which items were next.
16. Go to an empty checkout stand and try to check people out.
"Easy enough," England said aloud. He spotted a counter that was empty and void of any cashiers. He spotted one and went behind the counter, turned on the conveyor belt, and held the handheld scanner.
"Next please." Silence. Ok, ma'am, please pay attention to the sign. Ten items or less." He pointed to an invisible sign. "Ok, ok. Use the bar thing to separate your items."
He pretended to pick up an item and scan it, then moved it toward the bagging area.
"Come on, Johnson! Get a move on here! We don't have all day!"
.
17. Go up to an employee and in an official tone say "code three in house ware" and see what happens
England went on for about five more minutes, having forgotten why he was there, and the fact that he was supposed to be only pretending to check people out.
Suddenly, an employee came up to him and asked "What do you think you're doing?!"
England suddenly snapped out of his state and focused on his name tag. It read "Johnson". What a coincidence.
He then realized that it would be a perfect opportunity to try number 17. He stood up straight and official-like. "Johnson, there has been an emergency. I've taken over for Judy."
"Who's Judy?"
"That's not important! What is important is that we have a code three in houseware!"
England carefully watched Johnson to see what his reaction would be.
The employee went all serious and stuff.
"OH NO! A CODE THREE IN HOUSEWARE! THIS IS SERIOUS!" Then his face went normal again. "Um... What's a code three?"
England facepalmed at the stupidity of this employee. "I don't know, I'm just supposed to say that!"
"Oh, some kind of new employee test?" Johnson the Employee walked away in a huff. "Damn employers don't trust me..." he mumbled.
What was that all about? England wondered as he went off to find Marik, because he might be needed for number 20.
.
18. Follow random people through the aisles, always staying about five feet away. Continue to do this untill they leave the department.
Marik went into the food section of the store, passing the guy that he had hit in the head with a ham earlier, and began following people. However, none of them noticed him, and they left the food department unaware of him. The one person that did notice him didn't care.
After about five minutes, Marik got bored.
"Oh, frig this I'm moving on to number 19!" he shouted as he walked away.
.
19. Challenge other customers to duels with tubes of gift wrap.
Marik went to the section that had party stuff and found a roll of plain neon red gift wrap. He looked around for someone to challenge. He spotted a woman who looked to be in her 20's who seemed fit. Marik smiled and walked behind her. He tapped her on the shoulder with the tube. When she turned around, he held it up.
"I challenge you to a duel!" he yelled at her.
The woman looked at him with a bored expression and plainly said, "No."
But Marik insisted. "Yes! I command you to want to duel me!"
"Well you asked for it..." she said. She calmly walked over to where Marik had gotten his gift wrap and selected a plain neon blue roll. She held it up the way Marik held up his and shouted, "Lets do this!"
Their tubes met, and they began what looked like a sword fight with light sabers. The woman lunged for Marik's face, but he blocked the shot. He then aimed for her legs, but then he was blocked.
They continued like this until Marik took a step back, ready to attack. Just before he brought his tube down on her face, the woman made a break through and swiped her tune across his exposed stomach. Marik stopped his attack and stared at the woman in extreme shock. She smiled triumphantly at him. But then her smile faded when she saw rage on his face.
"You... Just... Attacked... My... MIDRIFF!" he screamed. Then he went all serious. "It's on now mother[EFF!]er!"
"Lets keep going then!" she said.
And they kept battling it out.
The two had somehow managed to leave the aisle five minutes ago and were in plain sight. A couple of people watched and cheered on the fight. It was starting to look like a crazy lightsaber-sword fight. And it was getting intense.
The woman aimed for Marik's head, but he dodged and ran around her to attack from behind. As he turned, she swung at his backside and somehow managed to knock of the Millenium Rod from where Marik had it tucked in one of his belt loops. She grabbed it and ran into the aisle again, grabbing a length of string, put the Rod inside the tube, part of it sticking out, and proceeded to tie them together.
This all took place in the span of three seconds, so Marik didn't know where the woman or his Rod had gone until she emerged from the aisle with it. She held up her newly improved weapon. "Who's smexy now, bitch? Haha, sorry I just had to say that. Now die, you weirdo!" she shouted as she lunged at him one final time.
In the last two minutes, England had found Marik and was horrified at what he saw. He had begun clearing away the people. When they were all gone, he shouted at Marik. "Marik! Let's go!"
"Shut up, limey pants! I'm busy dueling here!"
"You're only supposed to challenge them, not have a full-out battle!"
"Yeah! What he said. Shut up limey pants!"
The two continued fighting. England tried to pull the tube from Marik's hands, but ended up getting hit in the head with the woman's Millenium-Rod-tube instead. Being a country, a blow that would've knocked out a human only gave him a small bump on his head. "Ow," he groaned in pain.
He decided that it was time for some drastic measures. He got up and went off to the sidelines. He closed his eyes and concentrated. Not caring who saw him, he casted a spell on the two. "Aril-lee-carniferson-ree!" he shouted, holding his hands up in their general direction.
Both stopped their fight briefly as they noticed the tubes in their hands stop in mid-air and begin to shake. They both cried in surprise as the tubes magically floated into England's hands.
England lowered his arms and stared at the two former-duelists. He walked over to the aisle again, untied the Rod, returned both tubes to their original place, and walked toward Marik. "Here," he said sternly as he thrust the Rod into Marik's outstretched hand (which was actually out because he was waiting for his tube to magically float back to it). Then he grabbed Marik's other hand and dragged him away. "Lets go," he said.
As he was dragged away, Marik looked back at the woman and did the 'I'm watching you' thing with his fingers. She did the same before tinting around and continuing her shopping.
When they were far away enough, England released Marik's hand. Marik yelled at him. "What the frig was that for?! We were perfectly fine! That was rude the way you interrupted us like that! I was almost winning!"
"You weren't supposed to be battling for real! Why are you so stupid? And don't yell at me for being rude! You separated me and Bakura when we were talking. That is something rude!"
"Hmph. Anyway how did you do that floaty thingy with the tubes?" Marik looked impressed. "Oh my gosh are you a freaking Jedi?"
"No I am not 'a freaking Jedi'," England said to him. "Don't ask me about it. Again."
"Fine! Anyway you have the list?"
England calmed down and nodded, pulling the list from his back pocket. He also took out his pen and crossed off items 1-19; he had forgotten to do so before.
Marik looked over Arthur's shoulder for the list. Only number 20 was left. "Okay, let's do number twenty and then go find the other two."
"No that requires more people. I don't want to run into anyone else for today. Let's just go now."
"Fine. Friggin buzz kill," Marik mumbled.
The two walked toward the front of the store.
About ten feet away from the exit, they were intercepted by a security guard.
"Sirs, I'm going to have to ask you to leave. You've caused trouble in here and we can't allow you to drive away customers."
"[EFF!] you! You should be the one in trouble! There's no friggin toilet paper in your stalls! Your employees won't friggin leave us alone! People friggin steal stuff from us!"
England continued. "There is a dangerous lack of 'Wet Floor' signs, and people refused to be checked out! And people attack us with gift wrap! And we ARE leaving! That's why we're heading for the bloody door!"
The security guard looked at them incredulously. "Sirs, I still have to say..."
Marik looked at the guy's name tag. It read 'Steve'. Marik smiled evilly. He held his Millenium Rod up to the man and it glowed a bit. "Steve the Security Guard! I command you to let us pass and not try to stop us ever again!"
Steve the security guard's eyes glazed over and he said mindlessly, "Yes, master Marik." And he walked away.
Marik put his rod away and said to England, "Come on. Let's get the frig out of here."
"Wait! How did you do that?!" England asked curiously.
"Meh... I'll explain later. Or how about," he mimicked England's voice, "you just 'Don't ask me about it. Again.' Now shut up and let's go," he said grabbing England's hand and pulling him out of the store.
Having also finished the first 19, and deciding as well that they did not want to do 20, America and Bakura were also exiting their Wal-Mart. They stood in the front of the other store awkwardly, waiting for their companions to exit.
America was bored, so he decided to talk to Bakura. "So, how long you staying in the US?" he asked.
Bakura turned his head to Alfred, wondering why he was asking. "Why do you ask? And what makes you think that I'm visiting? Earlier you refered to me as a citizen."
Because you're not one of mine, America thought. Of course he didn't actually say that. What he actually said was, "Because, I can just tell you're not from around here. So how long are you staying?"
Bakura was about to answer, but then he realized that he didn't actually know. Marik had said that they were staying for 'a few days' and he knew that they were staying at least untill the end of this week. But Marik hadn't actually given him a number. Were they staying for longer afterwards? "Well, we're staying at least untill the end of the week. But I'm not sure about after that. Maybe longer if we actually decide to keep going with this stupid bloody list."
"Oh. That's cool. Maybe some time this week we can all do the list together? It'll be so epic and stuff!"
Bakura sighed in annoyance. "How about no? I have enough to deal with, having to hang around Marik while he does this kind of stuff. But I have to congratulate you on not being as idiotic and annoying as him. Well done, Alfred." Bakura suddenly felt as if he had seen this person before. He decided to pursue this feeling later. "And you never told me why you care."
"Ah... well... I was just making conversation. It's kinda boring out here waiting for them to return. And I would like to know just because... Well..." America became flustered as he tried to think of a better response, and noticed Bakura looking at him with a bored expression on his face.
In truth, Bakura was rather disappointed that Alfred wasn't as eccentric and exciting as Marik was. Marik was a challenge and a source of entertainment for him. Watching his antics and cleaning up whatever mess was left behind kept him occupied. And he actually didn't really mind Marik's company.
Much.
He waited for a better response to his question. "Well?" he asked Alfred. Suddenly, he heard the doors to the other Wal-Mart opening, and he turned around to see if anyone of interest was exiting.
He and Alfred both smiled in relief as Marik and England emerged from the store, the later being pulled along by the former.
"Bakura, I'm back! Did you miss me?"
"Alfred, I finally found you!"
As the four approached, Bakura and England moved such that they stood next to each other, facing Marik and America who also stood next to each other.
England spoke first. "I must say, you two, that was a pretty stupid move you both made, dragging the wrong person to the wrong place."
Bakura spoke up as well. "Yes, and not to mention rather rude. Seriously, why were you in such a hurry to make fools of yourselves with us?"
Marik and America stared in shock at their friends. America had an embarrassed look on his face that said he felt kinda stupid for making such and unhero-like fail. Marik's face portrayed more of a blank and apologetic look.
"Listen," America said. "It was a mistake and we won't do it again accidentally. I guess we probably were both a bit rushed to start the fun. And it was kinda mean how you two tried to ditch us for a few seconds. Almost like you didn't want us there..."
Bakura was about to say 'You might be right there.' When Alfred ran over to them and put a friendly arm around Arthur's shoulder. Arthur looked at Alfred in surprise, clearly caught off guard. "But nah! You totally love hanging out with me! You probably wanted to get a head start since you had the list and all, didn't you?"
Bakura rolled his eyes at the two of them. He walked over to Marik and took his hand. He looked back at England and America. "Well, Arthur I guess we'll see each other tomorrow? Same time, same place, maybe?"
England looked at Bakura and Marik. "Yeah. If we're lucky we'll run into each other tomorrow. Bye, Bakura."
"Bye, Arthur," Bakura said as he led Marik away.
Anyway, enjoy the first day of the list? Somehow that didn't seem as good or as funny as I wanted it to be, but let me know if you think otherwise! I need the reviews!
The same questions are still up for answering!
1) What state should this take place in? And what date do you want it to be? The day this chapter takes place must be a Monday. It should be in summer. Either June, July, or August.
2) I need some help. I'm going to ask for two people to be inserts into this. If you are an England or America fangirl or a Bakura or Marik fangirl, then you will be eligible to have me add you as a character into my fanfic. You have to be a fangirl of one of the two in either pair. (I will pick one America or England fangirl and one Marik or Bakura fangirl. Any one is fine, but I prefer an England and a Bakura fangirl.) If you want to be one of those two, then review saying which you are a fangirl of. The first 5 requests for each will be randomly selected. I will explain what you have to do when I contact you.
3) I'll need some plot ideas for when I get to the 200's. I have the match-ups and assignments decided for 1-200, now I need ideas for 201-300. You might want to save those ideas for later untill you see what I'm doing for the first week, at the end of which #2 will need an answer for.
4) I had a 4th question at some point, but I forgot what it was. Oh well!
5) But I have a 5th question to replace it! Do you want me to make Bakura Kitty!Bakura? It might not be relevant, but I know a lot of fangirls will swoon if I make Bakura a kitty. Your call. If you specifically don't want Kitty!Bakura, then I suggest you give a review saying 'no' very plainly in response to this question, otherwise if I get one more yes votes than no votes, then I will make him a kitty. If I get equal or zero votes for each, then the default is no kitty.
6) And what should the name of the hotel be?
Obviously, I made up the spell thing that England used to stop Marik's And Kira's (the name of the woman, who will make another appearance in the future, hehehe) duel.
Some previews of what will happen before the 100 mark:
Yami makes a verbal appearance in the next chapter! Can you guess for which number?
Someone gets Mind Crushed!
England gets drunk!
Marik's motorcycle gets stolen, but miraculously, not Ryou's bike!
USUK is very clearly discovered! But not by how you think it will be...
Number 206 is reserved for America, number 251 is reserved for Marik, and number 261 is reserved for Bakura.
Anyway here's a little bonus scene!:
Now at home, Joseph begins unpacking his groceries. He takes out his newly bought jar of peanut butter. He takes two slices of bread and spreads jelly on one.
Then, he begins to open the peanut butter jar.
As soon as the container lid is removed, Joseph sees something wierd and blackish-purply coming out of the jar. He watches in confusion as the darkness spreads around him.
A few seconds later, Joseph screams in terror as the Shadow Realm consumes him completely.
And he never got to finish making that sandwich.
In the hotel room, Bakura feels something a bit wierd. The Millenium Ring tingles a bit and he feels a bit more powerful.
He smiles evilly. Sucker.
"Marik, I think I actually enjoyed today."
"What was that, Bakura?"
"Nothing." Hehehe...
Anyway, see you next chapter, in which we have a bit of thiefshipping and USUK suggested. (Some of which will actually happen in the 1/2 chapter, which I will post after I post chapter 5.)
And a note: There will be NO pairing of England and Bakura. Just no. I just want to destroy any hopes about that now, before they get too out of hand. It won't happen. Just saying. It won't happen here. Ever.
Ok now...
The next chapters probably WILL be this long, give or take a few lines. That's because while most others that do 333 ways fanfics do about 5 items a day, I do 20. Also I have some plot line stuff in between that goes beyond the list.
Anyway...
See you next chapter!
BYEEEEEEE~!