Title: From boxers to bras
Summary: Naruto gets turned into a girl and now the guys are starting to see Konoha's loudest ninja in a new light. Poor, poor Naruto… A femmNaruto story.
Genre: Humor/one-sided romance
Disclaimer: Naruto belongs to Kishimoto©
Chapter 3: Cramps
Naruto woke up a few days later with a stomachache. Moaning Naruto turned over. The pain only increased. Naruto curled herself up into a ball, wrapping her arms over her stomach. 'I guess I shouldn't have eaten that eighth noodle cup…' she though groggily. She sat up slowly to get some Tums when she noticed how damp she was between her legs. She pulled back the bed sheet and to her horror found scarlet blood soaked into her bedding.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!"
Hinata Hyuuga was absent-mindedly walking toward the training grounds. Even though team Kurenai had long been dispersed, she and her teammates still meet up for morning practice when they weren't away on missions.
"HINATA!"
Hinata's heart quickened. "N-Naruto-kun?" she gasped. She could see Naruto approaching her.
She hadn't been able to meet the new Naruto. It was hard to believe. Her crush, the man she dreamed of marrying someday was no longer a man but a woman. She wouldn't have believed it herself if she haven't caught a glimpse of Naruto chasing an unwise shinobi (who tried to grope her) over the rooftops, swearing and throwing kunais with frightening accurate aim at his family's jewels.
It was too soon to see him (er, her) again!
"Oh Kami, please help me Hinata I'm dying!" Naruto slouched to the ground and gripped on the ends Hinata's jacket.
Hinata was alarmed. First she looked for superficial injury and found none. She then activated her byakugan for internal bleeding. Again, nothing was wrong. "I can't f-find anything w-wrong with you Naruto-kun—"
"There is!" Naruto protested. "I'm bleeding in-between my legs! Oh Kami, oh Kami!"
Hinata turned beat red…now she knew the problem. "N-Naruto-k-kun…y-you're not d-dying…"
"No!" Naruto grabbed hold of Hinata's collar and shook the girl. "Then why am I bleeding! Huh, huh!" she cried frantic.
"Y-you're having your f-f-first period, N-Naruto! Stop! Y-you're hurting me!"
Naruto loosened her grip as she peered into Hinata's face questioningly. "Period…? What period?"
Hinata whimpered. She felt a fainting spell coming on. "You know…your um l-l-little g-garden…" she tried to explain timidly.
Naruto looked at Hinata like the Hyuuga heiress had flipped. "What does a garden have to deal with me bleeding like someone stabbed me in the butt!"
Its obvious Naruto never had the 'talk'. Hinata had hers at age seven since her body developed so quickly at a young age. She remembered the 2 main rules her father stressed.
1: Never let any man touch you sexually unless he is your husband to preserve the dignity of not only yourself but the Clan's
2: No bastards will be allowed in my house so make sure to follow rule number 1 or I will disown you.
Pushing aside the 'rules' Hinata asked "Naruto-kun, you k-know that girls h-have babies right?"
"Yeah…"
"Well since you're a girl now, you can have b-babies…women have eggs and men…ahem s-sperm…the reason why you bleed is because your egg for this m-month has expired…"
"…Oh" Naruto mumbled airily before she passed out cold.
"NARUTO-KUN!"
Neji and Tenten were exhausted. Not because they had completed their hundredth lap around Konoha or because they had done two thousand one-hand push ups. No, that seemed nothing in comparison to watching the battle between Konoha's infamous green beasts. A one in a lifetime event: Might Gai vs. Rock Lee. The landscape in training ground 13 was hardly recognizable anymore.
Neji deactivated his byakugan and pulled a few twigs out of his long mane before helping up his teammate Tenten. The two had spent the last hour just trying to avoid being hit by a primary lotus jutsu and they were on the sidelines!
"Lee, I am so proud of you" Gai said to his student. Master and student were standing in the middle of the torn terrain. Both looked worse for wear but Gai looked like he hardly could stand.
Lee wiped the tears from his eyes. "Oh Gai-sensei!—"
"Lee, no!" Gai placed his hands on Lee's shoulders. "I am no longer your sensei. This battle has proven that…you have surpassed me!"
"Gai-se…Gai…"
"Lee…"
"I-I…" Lee cried falling into his former teacher's embrace. Gai hugged him tightly with tears streaming down his face. "Oh Lee, it's alright! Don't be sad from this healthy youthful change!"
Meanwhile Tenten and Neji stood off to the side looking like they wanted to puke.
"Eww!" Tenten yelped. She closed her eyes and shook her head violently. "Well that's one thing I'll never miss!" she then sighed. "Neji, how did we survive all these years?" she asked the only sane member of Team Gai besides herself.
"Tolerance…" Neji answered through clenched teeth. "Lots and lots of tolerance…"
"Tolerance my hind! I need sake to cope" Tenten announced turning away. "Coming, Neji? They won't miss us"
Neji looked back at the scene. A golden sunset could now be seen glowing behind Lee and Gai. "I'm right behind you, Tenten"
Naruto was in a bad mood after awaking up. First she gets turned into a girl and a few days later she gets her first period? Life was sooo wrong. Hinata had left her sitting at a tea stand while she went to the convenient store for Motrin and sanitary napkins.
Naruto was content to just sit there and mind her own business until she felt a pair of eyes on her. She ignored it at first but the staring wouldn't go away. She looked up to see that those scrutinizing eyes belonged to Neji.
Tenten was currently inside a local restaurant with her boyfriend, Tonbo (whom she and Neji ran into on the way there) so Neji just decided to give them some space and left only to run across Naruto Uzumaki, or so he thought—
"What the hell are you looking at white eyes?" Naruto demanded, glaring. "Beat it Neji before I beat you!"
Neji's jaw slacked. "…Who are you?" he cleared his throat. "You reminded me of someone, my mistake—"
"I guess I would, idiot" Naruto spat. "Because I am Naruto Uzumaki!"
"…Is this a prank?" Neji asked crossing his arms. He remembered Naruto's infamous sexy-no-jutsu.
Naruto cracked her knuckles. "Let's find out together, Neji! Come at me and you'll get the answer!"
Hinata was on her way back with the items when she saw the scene unfold in front of her. "N-no!" she shouted flinging herself between them trying to keep her cousin and her ex-crush from going at it.
She smiled nervously at Neji. "Oh um n-never mind N-Naruto-kun, she's going through h-her first sp-special time of the month" Hinata explained.
In a rare Kodak moment, Neji Hyuuga was left utterly speechless. So the rumors were true! He overheard several conversations stating that Naruto had an accidental sex change but dismissed them immediately because they sounded utterly ridiculous. However the proof was right before him and he didn't need the byakugan to see it!
Thirty minutes after Naruto took the pain killers, she was back to her jolly hyperactive self. In gratitude she decided to treat out Hinata to a dango shop for her help. Neji was invited to join them but he had to pay for his own food. Not that he complained. He chewed slowly as he listened carefully to Naruto's tale. It sounded well rehearsed like she had explained it a hundred times already—probably because she has.
Neji kept stealing glances at Naruto whenever he thought she was preoccupied with Hinata. He admitted that Naruto's feminine form was gorgeous although mentally she remained the same. Dense as ever. Accidently Neji arm brushed up against Naruto's and he felt a jolt.
"Ow!" Naruto whimpered. "Stupid static electricity" She rubbed her elbow. She then grinned mischievously at Neji. "Or maybe you're such a turn on Neji!" she joked.
Neji scoffed, turning away so his blush couldn't be seen. Hinata had a small smile on her face but her eyes held a different emotion though…a bittersweet look. She offered Neji an encouraging smile before she excusing herself.
"Oi! Why are you leaving?" Naruto asked a bit disappointed. "Is everything okay?" she asked.
Still moving toward the door, Hinata pressed her fingers together hesitantly and answered, "Everything's fine. I just have t-to go—Eep!"
"Ooo, careful there Hinata" Tenten said as Hinata bumped into her on the way out. Hinata had an expression on her face that reminded Tenten of sweet and sour sauce. Happy but sad…stealing a glance at Naruto she automatically knew why. Like everyone else in Konoha, she knew of Hinata's long term crush on the blonde and she couldn't even begin to imagine what she was going through inside.
Hinata muttered an apology before running off. Tenten watch her go with a hint of pity in her eyes before turning her attention to her comrade. "Yo Neji!" Tenten lifted the flap and entered the restaurant. "Why did you take off just like that?"
"I decided to give you and your boyfriend some privacy" He responded.
"It's okay, you could've stayed, it wasn't like me and Tonbo were doing anything mushy"
Neji gave her a flat look that said blankly, I still remember last time
Tenten chuckled nervously. "H-hey Naruto!" she greeted the blonde in hopes of changing subject. "How's womanhood treating you?"
"Bad" The blonde responded. A cute pout formed on her lips. "It sucks! I'm having my first period today and it hurts like hell. I have to stay high on pain killers or I'll be bitchy to everyone"
"You poor thing" Tenten said with full empathy. "You can try heating pads to help in between the pills. It'll get better after a few days, promise!"
Neji decided girl talk wasn't his thing. "Ma'am!" he called to the waitress. "Bring the check for all three"
The woman nodded before walking back into the kitchen.
Tenten was floored. "You're paying for yours, Hinata's and Naruto's meal?" she asked Neji incredulously.
"Yes…?" Neji raised his eyebrow. Silently asking what was the big deal.
"Well don't take this the wrong way Neji but you're a cheapskate" Tenten told him flatly. 'Besides you never paid for any of my meals!'
Neji glared at her. "Blunt as ever Tenten"
Naruto's face lit up like a lamp. "Really Neji?"
Neji nodded.
"Thanks!" she squealed happily. "I owe you one, see you around, Neji. Bye Tenten!" she said before leaving. Tenten then looked back at Neji. Her comrade was still staring at Naruto's retrieving back. Tenten inwardly sniggered. Neji was such an open book once you got to know him.
Neji turned to her when he noticed the stare. "What?"
Tenten's face broke out into an impish grin. "Oh nothing…I just see what's going on" She singed.
Neji crossed his arms and closed his silver eyes. "Really?" he said coolly.
"Yeeeeaaaah, you're digging Naruto-chan!"
Neji nearly fell sideways. "No I just—no!" he scoffed as his fair cheeks flared with heat. He cleared his throat as he composed himself. "Don't be absurd, Tenten" he responded through clenched teeth.
"Really!" the bun haired girl pressed on. This was so much fun! This was only third time in six years was she able to toy with Neji and she's not letting this rare opportunity slip by just yet. "I thought you liked Hinata at first but now I see you're starting to like Naruto!"
The poor Hyuuga wanted to die right on the spot. "Hinata-sama is my cousin. I do not have romantic feelings toward her—"
"Suuure and Naruto?"
"I don't like her like that!"
"Riiiiight" Tenten said with a knowing smirk. "Not yet…but there's something there isn't, Neji-kun? At least admit that"
Neji felt the veins on the side of his head pop. "There's nothing to admit. Y-you're crazy!" he snapped. Neji was grateful when the waitress came back with the check. He paid and left the shop, hoping Tenten wouldn't pursue him any further. Unfortunately and rather expectedly, Tenten followed him. 'You're not getting away that easily!' the bun-haired girl thought.
"Come on Neji, ask Naruto out on a date!"
"No"
"Do it!"
"I'm not going to date Naruto—"
"Till next week, tee-hee!"
"Tenten, stay out of it!"
Tenten skidded in front of Neji, cutting him off. Looking straight in his eyes she said. "Come on Neji, you and Naruto has been through a lot of shit in your lives. I think You guys can find some happiness together just like me and Tonbo did"
The Hyuuga fell silent as he took in her words. They were hogwash but hey he could dream. Tenten saw the wheels spinning in Neji's head, bravely she asked, "So what do you think?"
"Nothing" The Hyuuga prodigy said hauntingly. He shifted pass her and walked on. This time Tenten didn't follow. "Just think about it you pompous stick in the mud!" she called after him. "Okay?"
Neji stopped for a brief second. 'No, I won't allow myself to believe hogwash that will never be'. Deciding against answering the brunette he continued on his way.
"Humph!" Tenten said offended but then she giggled. She had the strangest feeling things were about to get interesting in Konoha and it all had to do with a whiskered cheek, blue eyed, blond haired transsexual. Tenten then went off to find Hinata. Hopefully the poor girl was done crying her heart out about now.
—TBC—
.