Finally! We were never introduced to Mrs. Sharp in the books, so I made her personality up. I imagine it's like a mix of Mrs. Weasley and Mrs. Mellark, so we'll see how this works out. Should be interesting, eh? As before, I am not Scott Westerfeld. His wonderful characters, setting, and just the world of Leviathan in general are just being borrowed by me.
The porch was completely iced over. Alek was only half listening as Deryn hissed more instructions to him; he was really concentrating more on not slipping down the icy stairs.
Something she said jolted him back to reality. "Alek, hello? Barking spiders, are you even listening to me?" she groaned.
"Sorry, what?" Alek asked distractedly.
Deryn was glaring at him. Alek suddenly realized how stressful this was probably on her. She was finally seeing her family again, after more than a year, and bringing a strange boy with her. Her mother was probably already livid about her running off a year ago, what would they say when she brought a former Clanker prince home?
"I said, remember to –"
She was interrupted by a blonde haired girl who poked her head out of the door. She stared at the couple for a moment, then hastily slammed the door closed, not bothering to introduce herself, invite them in, or even say hello. A second after that, loud cries of "It's Deryn! Deryn's home!" were heard on the other side of the door.
Deryn closed her eyes. "I give up," she muttered.
The door swung open, fully this time, revealing a tall woman with graying hair wearing an apron. "Well," she said, giving Deryn a disapproving look, "I see my daughter's decided to show up, finally."
Alek saw Deryn attempt to smile. "Happy Christmas, Ma," she said weakly.
"Don't you 'Happy Christmas' me, Deryn," Mrs. Sharp snapped. "I am very disappointed in you. Don't you know how much you and your brother scared me that night? I wake up one morning and you both are gone. Not a sign of you! Then I get a letter from Jaspert, two entire weeks after you both disappeared, telling me that you ran off to London so you could join the Air Service, of all things. So don't you dare 'Happy Christmas' me, lassie. You're in a boatload of trouble."
She seemed to just notice Alek. "And who is this?" she asked, glaring at him.
Alek stepped forward hesitantly. If all her family's like this, how did she survive all fifteen years? he asked himself. And another thought answered him, She didn't. She ran away to London. Alek very much wanted to run away at that moment, screaming and crying, anything but spending an entire weekend with Mrs. Sharp.
"Hello, I'm Alek Ferdinand, ma'am," he said timidly. Please, please let this go quickly.
Her eyes narrowed. "Aye, I've heard that name in the papers quite often lately. You're that Clanker prince, aren't you?"
Alek gulped nervously. "Yes, ma'am. Pleased to meet you." Not really.
He was worried about where the conversation would go. Thankfully, Deryn saved him. "Blisters, Ma. Are you going to keep interrogating us all Christmas or let us inside?"
Her mother shot her a this-isn't-over-young-lady glare, and stepped aside, letting them come into the house.
Alek was surprised by how large Deryn's family was. The room was crowded with people, with barely enough room for the two, plus Mrs. Sharp, to squeeze in. Alek fidgeted nervously. He hadn't expected Deryn to have so many relatives.
Mrs. Sharp bent down to hiss between the two. "Deryn, come help me and your Auntie Margaret in the kitchen. The Clanker here can manage by himself."
Deryn, despite her discomfort, gave her mother a disbelieving look. Alek couldn't believe it either. Had Mrs. Sharp just asked Deryn to cook? Everyone, everyone knew that Deryn couldn't cook to save her life. Alek and Dr. Barlow had learned that, unfortunately too late, when she had made them dinner in London.
"You want me…working in the kitchen…making food that people…are going to eat?" Deryn asked doubtfully.
"Yes! Deryn Sharp, come with me now." Ma Sharp gripped her arm and dragged her to the kitchen, leaving Alek to fend for himself with a roomful of people that were now gaping at him.
The little girl who had originally opened the door broke the silence by walking up and poking Alek in the leg. "Are you Deryn's boyfriend?" she asked loudly.
Alek winced inwardly. He was sure that Deryn could hear and was probably laughing her head off in the kitchen. Everyone was watching. And he was never good with children. What was he going to do?
Something else came to his rescue. There was a clattering sound coming from the direction of the kitchen, followed by a string of curse words from Deryn. Every head turned toward the noise, most in shock at the language, though Alek could have sworn that Deryn's brother, Jaspert, was grinning. The little girl's eyes lit up and she ran off to the kitchen, to do who knows what there. Alek was just glad that she had left him alone.
As soon as the girl left, an elderly lady hobbled up to Alek. "Who are you?" she asked croakily.
Alek bowed slightly and introduced himself to her. "I'm Alek, ma'am. Deryn invited me here for Christmas."
She stared at him uncomprehendingly, and then asked, "What? You have to speak up, lad. I can't hear it when you whisper."
Alek hadn't been whispering, but he didn't point that out to her. "I'm Alek," he said repeating his message slightly louder.
"Hello, Alexis," the woman said. "Who's this?" she asked, gesturing to Bovril.
"Bovril," the creature answered her. "Auntie Clarence," it giggled in Alek's ear.
Auntie Clarence stepped closer. "A talking squirrel," she muttered, examining it. Bovril looked offended – as offended as a fabricated perspicacious loris could be, that is.
"Not a squirrel," it said indignantly. "A loris."
The woman stared blankly, then burst out laughing. Without another word to Alek or Bovril, she hobbled off, continuing to giggle to herself.
When she was gone, Bovril leaned towards Alek's ear. "Absolutely bonkers," he quoted softly.
Alek nodded solemnly. "Indeed," he agreed.
A voice behind them startled Alek. "So you've met Auntie Clarence," Deryn said. "What did you think of her? Barking mad, ain't she?"
"I thought you were in the kitchen? How'd you escape?" Alek asked.
Deryn hung her head in mock shame. "Apparently I'm as terrible a cook as I am a lady. Ma kicked me out after I spilled potatoes all over her barking 'new dress!'" She grinned. "And because my little cousin Amelia started to learn some new words from the Service listening to me in the kitchen."
Alek laughed and the loris on his shoulder chuckled. Jaspert noticed the two talking and sidled up next to Alek.
"So, did Ma rag on you for wearing trousers yet?" he asked his little sister.
Deryn laughed. "Not yet. She's too barking busy screaming at me for everything else. In the five minutes I've been in that room, I've poured mashed potatoes down her dress front, started the stuffing on fire, and become a permanent bad influence on Amelia. But she'll get around to it, don't worry."
` Jaspert started to ask her questions about her time on the Leviathan, which Alek listened intently to and offered comments when he could. But soon the conversation strayed to their early lives in Glasgow and while the sibling talked, Alek started to feel left out.
He wandered around the sitting room – making sure to avoid Auntie Clarence, who at the moment was talking very loudly to an enormous cat about tea cozies and ice skating yellow ducks. He saw the little girl, Amelia, running around screeching things like "Blisters!" and "Barking spiders!" and other things bound to get Deryn in trouble. Christmas was never like this in Austria… he thought. But then again, Christmases in the palace weren't so great either. It probably had something to do with the fact that his entire family had hated his father and mother.
More trouble with Deryn. Alek could tell before he turned around.
"No! You are not going to stay in Glasgow for the entire weekend dressed in trousers! You're coming with me, young lady!"
Alek turned just to see Mrs. Sharp towing Deryn out of the room again and up a set of stairs. He met eyes with Deryn and tried to contain his laughter, knowing she'd probably murder him in his sleep if he so much as smiled. She looked absolutely miserable.
"I thought I burned this dress," Deryn muttered under her breath. Ma had squeezed her into one of her old dresses, complete with a corset and everything. "Do I have to wear the corset?" she complained. "I feel like I'm going to explode." Barking spiders, if Volger or Lilit could see her now, she'd never hear the end of it.
Mrs. Sharp looked horrified. "Of course you have to wear the corset! Actually act like a woman for once, Deryn. Now what did you do to your hair? Surely it should have started to grow back by now!"
It had started to grow back several times and Deryn had just kept hacking it off with a pair of scissors, but she'd be absolutely mad if she even considered telling her ma that. "I don't know," she muttered instead.
Mrs. Sharp fluffed it up, then smoothed it out, and finally proclaimed it hopeless. "I give up. We're missing supper, we'd better get downstairs."
"You don't expect me to go downstairs in this thing, do you?" The dress wasrather girly, all flounces and ribbons, and Deryn found it completely disgusting. And the thought of Alek seeing her in a dress, after all those years, and in a dress like this one, to make it worse – terrifying.
But Deryn had learned years ago that there was no contradicting her mother once she had decided something, so she was dragged down the stairs in her holiday finery.
And this, she thought, is why Jaspert never came home for Christmas.
I hope it sounds okay. Dappledvine requested that I put in the aunties' cat, and it's based off my own cat. The cat may, or may not, have a bigger part in the next chapter. I can't figure out if it's going to try to eat Bovril or do something else. Suggestions are welcome. Please review!
(P.S. Did ya'll catch the potato reference?)