A Fresh Start

"Louisa, I didn't know Claire was coming here. You weren't meant to meet her. Robert told me she was at a fundraiser – I just didn't know."

"It's quite alright. We had a nice chat and a cup of tea. She's very interesting and her work for Doctors Without Borders here and in The Sudan is – well - admirable."

"Oh, uh, did she tell you that I had gone to The Sudan?"

"Yes, Martin, as a matter of fact she did."

"I never really talk about that. That's why you didn't know."

"No Martin, you never really talk about many things, so that's why I don't know much at all about you."

"I'm sorry. Let's not get into it, Louisa. Let's just have a fresh start this weekend."

"Yes, a fresh start. Let's forget all the stupid rubbish that has gone on between us. But Martin we do have to talk. We do have to know things about each other."

Martin looks solemnly at Louisa, embraces her and bends to kiss her. A lingering kiss follows and she feels as if she is melting into him – so warm, so soft, exactly what she wants after her hectic day. Suddenly, he breaks away saying, "Excuse me." Louisa watches as he walks down the hall to the bedroom. Going to the table she picks up the tea cups and carries them and the plate to the kitchen. She slowly chews the last piece of apple, rinses the tea cups and places them in the dishwasher along with the plate.

Martin still has not returned, so she walks to a bookshelf and looks at the titles. Mostly books on foreign affairs, travel and history, but there are several shelves brimming with art books. She opens one from the Victoria and Albert Museum and recalls her many visits to the museum with Danny when they were at university. Stuffed in the book is a program from a ceramic tile exhibit held at the museum's architectural wing several months ago. Exactly what Danny would want to see. Louisa closes the book quickly and places it on the shelf. A book about the Sydney Opera House seems more promising. She slowly turns its pages not really taking in anything as she waits for Martin.

A few times she looks toward the hall to see if he is coming back. She checks her watch and it is 8:45. Is he sick? Was he upset about her remark that he doesn't tell her things? Does he realize he made a big mistake having her in London and wants her to go away? She will give him until 9. If he doesn't return she'll ask if she should leave. At the thought, tears well up and she brushes them from her eyes. He has just kissed her quite forcefully and seemed reasonably happy to see her. That is the problem. She doesn't know Martin. She doesn't know what is normal behaviour for him and what upsets him. God, this was a mistake. Better they should have their tiffs in Portwenn where they could walk back to their respective houses and avoid each other for a few days.

Then Martin walks into the room with an expectant look. "Sorry, a few things needed attention. Could I bring you anything, Louisa - a glass of wine or more tea? I'm going to have a mineral water."

With a small cry of relief, Louisa runs to Martin and throws her arms around him. "Martin, I thought you were angry with me. I thought you wanted me to leave."

"What do you mean Louisa? I just had to use the lavatory and check some phone messages and emails. No, I don't want you to leave. I want you to stay. I want you to stay very much. Um, I noticed that your – uh - things are in the bath. Are we going to share – uh – the bedroom?"

"Martin, I thought that was what you wanted. Why you asked me here."

"Well, it is up to you. I don't want to presume."

"Look, Martin, I wrote reports most of the night and started meeting parents at dawn. Then I worked straight through until rushing to meet the train. During the trip I answered tedious emails and finished a proposal that the school's Board will likely reject. I've had a shower and carefully rubbed cream with absolutely no aroma on my body so there would be nothing to put you off. I am wearing a pretty lace bra and cleaned my teeth twice. I have known you nearly three years and wanted you for most of that time. And from the way you kissed me, I think that you want me too. I would like to share the bedroom with you, I would like to share the bed with you, I would like you to hold me, kiss me and make love to me. I think that is what you want as well, Martin, and I'm not going to have a row with you about presuming anything. Understand."

"So you don't want a glass of wine, then? Just kidding – come here."

Martin folds her into his arms and tells her a few things she has longed to hear. Despite his reassuring words, her frustrations with him erupt, and she tells him a few things he probably doesn't want to hear. And then he does something so unlike Martin: He smiles. No it is more of an apologetic grin, then he kisses her and says. "I know how you feel, I often feel the same about you."

It is her turn to apologize, but he stops her with a long, powerful kiss that leaves no doubt about his desire to share the bedroom. Martin half carries her down the long hall as they don't want to break the hold they have on each other.

X X X

After sleeping for several hours, Martin nudges her awake and murmurs: "I'm getting some water. Can I bring you anything?"

Louisa realizes that she is very hungry. Nothing but the apple since the sandwich on the train. "If you have a bit of cheese or some biscuits, I'm starving." With that her stomach rumbles loudly.

Martin nods his head and says: "Right, then, I hear you're hungry." He enters the bathroom and returns in his dressing gown. After Martin leaves, Louisa stretches, smiles, and goes to the loo. She picks up Martin's shirt lying next to the bed and puts it on against the cold air from the open window. She wees, splashes water on her face and cleans her teeth. Crawling back into bed, she pulls the duvet up to her chin and soon falls asleep.

She is brought around by Martin who is sitting beside her with a tray containing two glasses of water and a heavenly smelling plate of food. "I've brought you a cheese toast. My hall mother at school made these for us after we had been ill."

Louisa sits up, has a drink of water and picks up a quarter of the precisely cut bread. "Hmm, Martin. This is so good. It's just what I wanted." She finishes the second quarter in a few bites while smiling at Martin. He slowly drinks water and stares at Louisa. Louisa continues to eat and Martin clears his throat and says: "Um, you are wearing my shirt." Louisa laughs and says: "Sorry, a bit chilly in here and I grabbed it when I went to the loo."

"Oh right, so you know it's good to urinate following sexual intercourse as it rids the – um – area of bacteria."

Louisa glares at him and says: "Martin, do not do that again this weekend. I don't care about bodily functions, hygiene or any of your medical observations. You are only allowed to tell me I am beautiful or any other compliment you can muster. And you have to tell me more about your life before Portwenn. I don't even know where you went to school."

"Well, I went away to two schools before Oxford. The first from 5 to 10 years old and the second from 11 to 17."

"You were sent away to school when you were 5?"