Chapter 3
River's icy glare burned against the Doctor's skin. There was more than her usual frustration with him now – no, there was a marked fury written all across her face. The discomfort had turned the seconds of silence since he'd told her they'd need to open the heart of the TARDIS into what felt like agonizing hours. This was something he had to mark – the Doctor in the TARDIS who feared no man did fear a woman – this woman – and her disapproving glare.
Oh, what fun married life will be, he thought.
"You have definitely lost it." River growled.
"River," the Doctor started.
"You've tried to pull some tricks in your day," River continued, speaking over the Doctor's futile attempts at interrupting her, "but this? Are you mad? Are you absolutely daft?"
"Yes, I am, but that's nothing to do with this," The Doctor finally managed to get a word in, "if you'd just let me finish explaining—"
"You'll risk killing us all!" River shouted. The Doctor flinched.
"There's no need to shout," he said in an indoor voice.
"I will shout if I bloody well like, thank you. As for you, if you even think—"
River's sentence was interrupted by the Doctor's index finger placed upon her lip. Her eyes widened in that familiar way that they did whenever she criticized his behavior, but her silence showed that she was finally willing to listen.
"Right, good," the Doctor exhaled. "Now, the TARDIS controls are completely restricted. Beyond deadlocked. Same with the exits. Physically, nothing is getting in or out of this room. Note that word I just used – physically."
"So we're going to be getting out of here in a non-physical way?"
"You're not. I am."
The Doctor expected her to seem annoyed at her exclusion, but instead she appeared concerned, as if she (accurately) assumed that what he was about to describe would be wildly dangerous. After all, why else would he exclude his companion?
"Because what I'm about to do, were you in my position, you couldn't survive the process," he explained with hesitation. "Your body would burn to a cinder. Or you could revert to an infant state. Or you could become a demigod and then burn to death. All three are very interesting options. All three of which have happened before. None of which we need to explore again today." He recalled the Bad Wolf and Blon Slitheen.
"Doctor, I don't understand." River interjected.
"No, of course you don't." The Doctor sighed. He knew this plan would be risky. He knew that the odds of them both being incinerated immediately were staggeringly high. He was also aware that if he lost control, the chances of her burning slowly to a crisp and him burning at an even slower, more excruciating rate, were staggeringly higher. But his hands were tied. What else could he do? His sonic was useless, he couldn't pilot his own TARDIS. His only option was improvisation. He was good at improvising…sometimes.
"River, what I'm about to describe to you is going to sound very dangerous, very insane, a little bit careless but altogether genius, and you have to promise me that you won't say a word until I'm finished. Do you understand?"
River's expression showed that she did not understand, and she did not agree. Whatever plan this was, it would be foolish and risky. But she had to give in, because she did trust this man with everything. After all the times he'd saved her life – after the way he'd pretty much been her life – he at least deserved the benefit of the doubt now, in this scenario when her well-being wasn't the only one at stake.
"Okay," River nodded.
"Good. Now, the TARDIS exists all across time and space. Anywhere and everywhere and anything that has ever happened or ever could or would happen, the TARDIS knows about and has seen and has felt. The TARDIS is literally everywhere at once. She's truly omniscient." he said with a hint of pride in his voice.
"Yes, but that's useless to us now since we can't pilot her." River interjected.
"You promised you'd be quiet," The Doctor grumbled.
"I had my fingers crossed behind my back," River said, and the Doctor grew a little smirk. He did love her defiance. "Go on."
"Well, in any normal situation, she'd be useless to us, but not quite now. We may not be able to control it through the console, but maybe, just maybe…" the Doctor hesitated. This would not sit well with River. "Maybe I can control it with my mind." River's ears seemed to steam from her rage, but the Doctor continued before she could interrupt, walking away from her. "All I need is a small part, a tiny bit. Even the fewest particles of the Heart are enough to shut off the electricity across city blocks or briefly interrupt a planet's gravity. Both of which have happened before. Neither of which we need to explore today."
"And how do you intend to keep that from happening?" River asked with a marked skepticism.
"Because I'm going to harness it all within my body," the Doctor now turned to face River, "and then I'm going to need you."
"Me? What for?" she asked.
"You've no doubt had psychic training, River, am I correct?"
"Of course, I learned from the best."
"I'm going to assume that's me. Now, if I can harness the pure, raw power of time travel, the ability to go anywhere and see anything, and then I had a psychic mind to use as a subject, my own personal ball of wibbly-wobbly for me to move freely around, I can potentially explore recent events within the TARDIS and find out the identity of our little stowaway."
"You want to time-travel through my brain and watch my memories?" River tried to simplify his cryptic language.
"Yes," the Doctor confirmed. "Well, no. Not watch. If I'm right, and I usually am, I'll get to live your memories. Experience them myself and even control them." The Doctor had a small laugh at this concept. It was revolutionary, and all kinds of brilliant by his standards. River's face, however, remained stone-cold.
"I still don't understand," River said.
"Think of it this way. Time can be rewritten. And the Heart of the TARDIS has the power to change reality. So, if I'm in your brain, I can use that power to rewrite your memories, and maybe, if I've got enough power and I'm really, really lucky, the power of the TARDIS will make whatever changes to your memory hold true in history. The timeline will rewrite itself to suit your memories."
River seemed perplexed, but as she thought about it, appeared more acceptant of the idea. She nodded, but raised her hand to mark one final question.
"But—" She started, but the Doctor cut her off.
"What if it doesn't work? What if I can't perform psychic time-travel? What if I burn up and you do too and the TARDIS remains permanently locked down?" The Doctor asked for her. "Well, that's simple. One, you won't be harmed, the heart of the TARDIS isn't going anywhere near you, it's staying entirely within me. Second, I don't need that much energy. The entire TARDIS Heart would take about five minutes to do away with me entirely, but the small part I'm grabbing will take, I don't know, an hour, ninety minutes at the most?"
"Oh, that's comforting." River said sarcastically.
"But think about how cool this is! If this works, I will have successfully invented psychic time-travel!" the Doctor said with a grin. "I could get a book written about me! Well, one that I actually wanted written."
"Doctor," River asked gravely, "Are you sure this will work?"
"Not at all," the Doctor answered truthfully. "But it's the only option we've got. We have to try."
River gave no answer. She just looked into his eyes. The Doctor's expression was determined, fierce. He was eager to try this. If he wasn't certain that psychic time-travel would work, he was certain that if everything went according to plan he would absolutely destroy whatever was interfering with his TARDIS. River could read this in his face, and that was enough for her. She sighed, and nodded.
"Perfect! Now let's get cracking," The Doctor yelled, and then scampered away while talking, going under the TARDIS platform to the machinery housed underneath. River followed. "Now, all I need is to use my screwdriver to open up the Heart very briefly, and we should be good." He finally stopped in front of the green glowing column reaching from the low ceiling to a large orb on the floor, complete with soft pipes going through it. "The Heart of the TARDIS is in there. Think of it like the chest cavity, except without lungs or blood vessels or…chest thingies," the Doctor pointed briefly at River's breasts.
River rolled her eyes. "Well put."
"Now, my sonic doesn't work to override any of the technology in this room, but I bet it can still force things open." The Doctor knelt down in front of the orb, the green light of the column reflecting off his face. He pulled his sonic out from his top pocket, and pointed it at one of the pipes. Whirring loudly as ever, the sonic shone on the pipe for a full ten seconds, but nothing happened. The pipe didn't detach itself from the orb. The Doctor kept trying repeatedly, changing the settings on the sonic every time, but to no avail.
"Here, sweetie," River said as she knelt down next to him. He turned to her, and watched her pull a tiny black box, almost like a laser pointer, out of her bra. Smiling as if she could tell he was both fascinated, aroused, and a tiny bit uncomfortable, she pressed a large button on its side and it expanded to become a Phillips screwdriver. She handed it to the Doctor, who put away his sonic and examined this new screwdriver with intense scrutiny.
"What else do you keep in there?" he asked with wonder.
"Oh you know, cosmetics, weapons, magazines," she responded. "They're bigger on the inside."
"Oh…you just love to distract me, don't you!" the Doctor said with an air of playfulness in his voice, and started to remove each screw holding the pipe in place. Finally, he'd removed them all. He held the pipe in place so that no particles would escape before he wanted them to.
"River, you're going to want to stand back a bit," he warned. River did as she was told and stepped back a few feet. The Doctor hesitated, and said "Geronimo."
He raised the pipe up to his mouth, and started taking a deep breath, inhaling the Heart of the TARDIS. His skin immediately started to glow bright gold. His eyes shone with the brilliance of a thousand suns. His hair started waving and blowing as if he was being buffeted by wind. He inhaled deeply from the pipe with his mouth, and then exhaled through his nose, with some stray particles of the TARDIS Heart escaping from his nostrils and then dissipating into the air. He repeated again. And again. Finally, after the third or fourth time, River interfered.
"Doctor, that's enough!" she cried, and grabbed the pipe from his hands. She placed it back on the sphere and started to replace the screws.
"River…" the doctor coughed. His voice sounded unearthly – it echoed as if they were in a deep cave, but at the same time sounded like music, as if there were two voices speaking simultaneously in melodic harmony. "River, come here."
"Doctor, are you all right?" she asked, running to him. He was glowing all over. She couldn't tell if the glowing was caused by his body harboring the TARDIS, or if he was starting to regenerate.
"I'm fine, it's perfectly fine," he said. "I just feel a slight stinging sensation here," he pointed to his left heart, "and here," he pointed to his right. "But in here," he pointed to his brain, "it's all explody-wody, quite frankly, it's absolutely brilliant! I should do this more often! No, no, that's a very bad idea. I should never do this again. No, River…" his voice was starting to deteriorate into a croak. "River, I need you to let down your mental defenses. Can you do that?"
"Doctor…"
"Please, River. We don't have much time."
River sighed, and then nodded. She closed her eyes. The Doctor placed his fingers on her temples, and then closed his eyes. At first, he felt nothing change. But suddenly, he felt a huge surge of heat travel quickly from his brain down through his neck, into his shoulders, up through his arms, and down into his fingertips. Then he couldn't see, hear, or feel anything at all.