Wait (Looks Are Deceiving)

by Mynameisntlunabuticanlovegood

Modern Day AU. OOC. Fannie (aka Odesta). Finnick is fine. Annie is fine. They are both fine. But are they really ? You don't see things you don't want to see. Then you regret. But "then" is too late. Or is it yet ? All you can do is wait. For life, death; whatever seems better to you. (I have a VERY irregular rhythm of posting)

3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Posted: 06/21/2015

Annie

Sometimes I wish I would just do it already. At least I'd belong to some kind of people.

But I'm afraid. I don't want to be nothing - wait that's already done. I don't want to feel (in lack of a better term; though it's been a long time since I felt anything) nor see nothing.

Oh, irony. A suicidal girl, afraid of dying.

I used to be normal. A cute little girl, with two pigtails, then a nice teenager with quite a developed taste for books and reading in general, and then... this. Her. Then I became her.

How did this happen ? How did she happen ? Right, as if you didn't remember. No. Please no. Stop. You did this. No, that's not true. You know it is. Stop denying the truth. You're sure you don't remember ? Let's refresh this pretty little memory of yours... NO PLEASE !

*FLASHBACK*

She is invisible to him. So what ? She has moved on. She has a boyfriend. If he can date, then so does she. At least Coloniarus sees her. He talks to her. She is pretty sure he makes her feel something.

Tonight he has invited her to a party he organizes with a few of his friends. She dresses up, styles her hair instead of letting it fall in its usual waves. She looks at herself in the mirror; she feels... pretty. He is two years older than her, he is quite attractive. She wants to be more desirable to him than all the other women she knows he dated or slept with. She wants to feel and look like one, to him - a woman, that is.

...

This is not what she thought it would be like.

He had opened the door when she had rang the bell. He already had these big, red eyes, as if he had been crying. She knew, however, that he hadn't.

She had walked in his apartment. Some guys were on the couch, a few of them looked passed out. Opened bottles of beer were on the coffee table, others, on the floor.

Music was being played in the background.

She had sat next to him. One of the passed-out guys seems to have woken up, and was mumbling something along the lines of "chick", "fuckable". She assumed it was adressed to her.

She didn't feel right here. He turned his head towards her, and said that "she had to try that, she'd feel so good".

She is not stupid, she knows what that kind of weird-smelling cigarette is.

He doesn't see her. She has moved on.

Just one time can't hurt, right ?

.

Well, believe her, a dozen can, very bad.