With or Without You
By: Cliff Zingler
Chapter 3

Blair couldn't believe it

Blair couldn't believe it. No, she wouldn't believe it. Had she really seen what she thought she had seen? Serena… hanging with… Chuck? She shook her head. Gossip Girl had to be wrong this time. There was no way. Blair went back to her Algebra homework, looking for her calculator. But she found that she was having trouble concentrating on her homework. She reached for her phone and began to send a questioning text to Serena, when there was a knock on the door. Blair tossed her phone on the bed.

"Come in."

Serena burst in the room, quite out of breath and red in the face.

"Hey! B – don't believe anything Gossip Girl says! I…"

"Relax, S. It's fine. I learned the hard way not to trust Gossip Girl so much anymore," Blair smiled. Serena's eyes widened in surprise.

"Oh."

"But really, I am curious… what were you doing with Chuck, anyway? I know you're not his biggest fan…" Blair asked, trying very hard to keep her suspicions in check. After all, Serena had helped her out more times than she could count.

She had also hurt her nearly as many times.

Serena said nothing, shifting back and forth on her feet. An extremely awkward silence followed.

"Well?"

"I can't really tell you, B, but – "

"Can't really tell me? Why the hell not?! Aren't I your best friend?!"

"Yes, Blair, but – "

"But what?! We had promised – no more secrets! We promised that day when I found you reading at the park. Whatever happened to that, huh?"

"Blair, I – "

"Out! Get out! I don't even want to look at you if you can't talk to me!" Blair shrieked, tears forming in her eyes as she turned away from her friend. Serena strode over to her grabbing her shoulders, forcing Blair to look her in the eye.

"Blair, calm down! Listen to me for a second before you jump to all these insane conclusions!" Serena gave her friend a good shake.

"I'm not after Chuck, Blair," she whispered, watching Blair's dark brown eyes widen, filling with even more tears. Serena could have sworn she had seen a bit of hope swirling around in those eyes of hers. Blair's jaw hardened.

"Why would I care what you do with Chuck? I was just thinking of Brooklyn. We all know how hopelessly in love he is with you," she replied, nearly jumping out of her bed, heading towards the bathroom. Serena crinkled her eyebrows in confusion.

"Since when do you care about Dan?"

"Since I've been around you guys nonstop – I never really noticed how much you guys cared for each other," Blair called from the bathroom as she rummaged through her drawers in search of her brush.

"That's what happens when you fall in love," Serena murmured.

"What was that?" Blair poked her head out of the doorway. Serena looked up and smiled.

"Nothing. So you and I need to talk about some things."

"Like?"

"Your role in society, for one thing."

"What about it? For once, I don't want to think about it," Blair groaned as she walked back into the bedroom. She avoided Serena's curious eyes.

"Blair, look at me! This is serious – I know you're unhappy…"

"Do you?" Blair shot back, her eyes cold.

"Yeah, I do," Serena whispered. Blair suddenly realized how biting her words had been. She walked over to the bed, and wrapped an arm around her.

"I'm sorry, S. I didn't mean it like that. It's just… been really hard, you know? But I'm glad you're here."

"You know, Blair," Serena inched closer to her, mentally crossing her fingers, "there are other people who want to be there for you…" Blair's head snapped up.

"What are you talking about?" Serena smiled, a mischievous gleam in her eye.

"All I'm going to say, is that, while it's good to keep a clear head on your shoulders, you have to trust your instincts, and know that you can trust some of us, even some of those who really hurt you."

"What are you talking about?" Blair repeated, her eyes narrowing, clenching her fists subconsciously.

"Just think about what I said, alright? I gotta go – Mom wanted me back at the Palace early tonight – something to do with Bart, blech," Serena shuddered at the thought. She gathered her things and headed for the door. Blair remained silent, taking in Serena's words.

What was all that about?

Monday going on Friday. Or so Blair wished. But it was only Thursday, and the day couldn't go by any slower for her. She sat impatiently in her seat, staring at the clock. It was the longest two minutes of her life. She hadn't quite forgotten what Serena told her a few days back. But she was still unsure of what to think. She let her mind wander a bit, taking care not to let her emotions get to the best of her.

Lost in her thoughts, she hardly realized the bell had even rung, and it wasn't until she noticed the others students getting up around her that she shook herself out of her reveries. Blair quickly grabbed her books and purse and walked, head cast down so as to avoid any sneers, out of the room, bumping into the last person she had expected to see..

"Blair!" She looked up into his deep eyes, but before she could say anything, he leaned down to pick up one of the books she had dropped.

"Nathaniel. To what do I owe this pleasure?" she sniffed as he handed her back the book. Nate stuck his hands in his pockets, shrugging.

"I… I wanted to talk to you…"

"Talk? About what? I've think we've already discussed enough last week, wouldn't you say?" she started to walk away, only to feel his hand lightly grabbing her arm.

"Blair, wait… Hang on a second, would ya?" She turned around, clearly waiting for him to continue.

"Well?" Nate took a deep breath, running a hand through his dark hair.

"Well… I've been thinking that… maybe we were a little hasty, in doing what we did…"

"We? There is no 'we' in this, Nate. I wanted to work this out. I wanted to stay together. You wanted to get the hell away from me, like I was some used laundry that you wanted to get rid of!? Blair exclaimed, earning a few glances from the passerbys in the hall. Nate again grabbed her arm, leading her outside to the courtyard.

"You're right. I screwed up. I'm not perfect, Blair. But… I can't stop thinking about you. Ever since that day, I've been thinking, and trying to get the courage to talk to you, to apologize for what I said, for everything that I've said," he replied, searching her eyes for some kind if answer. Blair was, for once, speechless. Who would have thought that the Tormented Little Rich Boy could finally get the guts to apologize?

"Nate, I don't know…"

"I'm not asking you to do anything right now. I just… I wanted to apologize, and I'm hoping that we can, you know, start over… as friends. 'Cause I really do miss seeing you Blair," he finished quickly. Blair thought for a moment.

Didn't Serena mention something about learning to trust again?

But was she talking about Nate when she said that?

Blair mentally shook her head, more confused than ever. But she was tired of being alone, tired of being shunned from society.

"Okay, Nate. It's fine. Let's just try and forget this happened, and start over. As friends," she emphasized her last few words, her eyes narrowing.

"As friends."

"AS FRIENDS?!"

Chuck wasn't happy. No, he was angry. No, he was absolutely seething.

He paced furiously about his suite, trying very hard not to hurt something. He couldn't even look at his phone, the message from Gossip Girl was too much for him at the moment. All he wanted to do want punch the hell out of his pillow. Why did he listen to Serena? She didn't know anything, anything!

Gossip Girl here. So it seems that, yet again, there is to be a rekindling romance between Ex Queen B and her once knight in shining armor, N. But who's really surprised? You're not fooling us, B & N, with your "as friends" routine. We'll give about three weeks until they break up again.

As if by magic, his phone started to ring. Chuck picked it up, surprised to see that the Caller I.D. was actually Serena. He sighed, taking the call.

"What do you want?"

"Don't listen to Gossip Girl. I'm going to figure this one out. I'll update you on what's going on later."

Without getting a chance to reply, Serena hung up, obviously in a rush. Chuck groaned.

"What the hell am I getting myself into?!"

"AS FRIENDS?!"

Serena was on the verge of tears, she was so frustrated with her best friend right now.

Blair stared at her from her bed, utterly bewildered.

"S, I thought you'd be happy for me… You're the one who told me I needed to trust more…"

"Yeah, trust the right people!!" Serena exclaimed, throwing her hands up in the air. She sighed, shaking her head.

"I don't understand. Who are you talking about then, if not Nate? I mean, we've been together since kindergarten, well, off and on, anyway…" Blair trailed off.

"Which is exactly the reason why you two are completely wrong for each other, B! Think back on those years. Could you honesty say you were happy with him?" Serena questioned, sitting down next to her friend on the bed, crossing her legs absentmindedly. Blair's brow furrowed in deep thought for a moment or two, thinking back on the memories..

"Sometimes, I think so, yeah. I don't know, S. I'm just so tired of being alone. I'm so tired of everyone shunning me out! And when Nate and I ran into each other, and started talking, I don't know… it just… seemed like everything was going to be okay…"

Serena sighed, grabbing her things and heading towards the door.

"Well, you know best – it's your life, after all. Just do one thing for me: think this through, and make the right choice, because there are others out there who are more worth your time than Nate."

After Serena left, Blair's eyes started to water.

"What the hell am I getting myself into?"

A/N: Sorry about taking so long to update, everyone! Things have been really hectic and stressful lately, and I finally finished this chapter - am working on the next one also! Please review, and enjoy!

cheers