featuring Sirius & Remus fluff

Sirius tacked up the twelfth mistletoe that evening in the central living room and kitchen of the Potters' house. He sat back with satisfied hands on his hips. "There- now I'll definitely get the kiss I've been waiting for!"

James shook his head, looking up at the dozen clumps of leaves and berries hanging from his ceiling. "Are you sure this won't backfire and lead to your target skillfully avoiding all of them, or otherwise not coming out at all, or, worse still, kissing others under the mistletoe all night?"

"I don't even care if he does kiss someone else tonight," Sirius said. "He'll just be awkward about it, give 'em a quick smooch, and walk on. It's a perfect plan, James! He'll be awkward about all the mistletoe and come find me at some point, and I'll be waiting, and give him a real smooch, and then the past year worth of pining will all come together! You know I've been waiting for a mistletoe kiss since last Christmas."

"What, McKinnon wasn't enough?"

"McKinnon made me realize girls weren't quite my thing. No offense to her- she's beautiful- but not what I want." He elbowed James. "C'mon, if Evans does show, you'll be glad I put her in a situation where she has to kiss you!"

"I don't want to coerce the girl!" James said. "That's not exactly the best method of seduction, you know!"

"And if it works? Then you'll be thanking me. Sometimes all it takes a kiss for them to realize their feelings!"

"What if they realize feelings for someone else?"

"They won't. It's fate."

"If the whole world shared your optimism, Sirius Black, it would be far more dangerous."

"What's life without a little adventure?" Sirius crowed, and they resumed the other decorations as they waited. Peter arrived early and went directly to the cheese platter, beginning to eat. Then Dorcas Meadowes arrived with Marlene McKinnon, and James put on a record. The whole sixth year class began to file in over the next hour- Phineus Bones, Artorus Fromm, and so on, filling the Potters' house's lower floor. James kept them mostly confined to the living room, kitchen, and backyard.

Toward the middle of the evening, Lily Evans walked in, red hair like a halo around her unamused expression and sparking green eyes, flanked by Remus and Griffin Scamander.

Sirius met eyes with James and waggled his eyebrows, grinning already. James moved in toward his own goal for the evening- Sirius had talked him into trying to get Lily Evans under the mistletoe- while Sirius downed his whiskey-laced eggnog. Riding liquid confidence, he headed for a bundle of mistletoe in the exact kind of quiet corner Remus would make it around to by the end of the night. Sure, lurking under mistletoe was a bit predictable, but he wasn't here for shock value.

He grinned to see Marlene walking out from beneath the mistletoe. "Deja vu, eh, McKinnon?"

"Like a year hasn't passed, except now you can grow a beard," she teased, and she closed her green eyes to press a quick kiss to his lips before wandering off into the crowd once more.

Last year, kissing McKinnon had been on the top of Sirius's to-do list- she had shape to her figure, a quick wit, gorgeous blonde hair, and a smile that could cripple. Oh, how priorities change. He and Marlene were good friends still, better now that he wasn't annoying her with his thin-veiled attempts at seduction, and even better when he revealed to her why he didn't exactly kiss back. She didn't mind a bit.

The party continued; Sirius grinned when he spotted James dancing with Evans- she looked irritated and he was grinning, so she'd probably just insulted him heavily. He pinched her cheek and she slapped him, and Sirius laughed as he turned away. Eventually, James would learn that annoying her wasn't really the way to her heart. Sirius glanced around again- and realized Remus was nowhere in the living room.

He headed off through the kitchen but he wasn't there either, and didn't show up in the backyard. "Weird," Sirius muttered. He refilled his own glass and fixed one for his friend, and then headed upstairs, going to the guest bedroom where they'd be staying that night. He walked in to find Remus sitting on the bed, writing something. Sirius wandered over.

"Your muse sparked?"

Remus forced a half-smile. "Just feeling a little detached. You know parties aren't exactly my scene."

"Ah." Remus wagged his pen over the page as though he'd forgotten the words he'd planned, and then jotted down a few more and looked up.

"By all means, head back down; I didn't mean to interrupt your partying."

Sirius chuckled and sat on the bed next to Remus. "It's no fun without you there."

Remus cocked an eyebrow, his dark blue eyes meeting Sirius's. "Oh yes, I'm sure my fretting and disapproval makes me just the life of the party."

"Feels a little empty without it." Sirius bumped Remus with his shoulder. "Ah, c'mon- you can finish sulking and writing poetry later! Come downstairs. I won't even ask you to dance. Just come socialize a bit. I'll be right by your side the whole evening."

"You're not going to pressure me into walking under the mistletoe with some girl I hardly know again, are you?"

Sirius chuckled. "Not this year."

"What, too busy kissing McKinnon to bother with my affairs?"

Sirius nearly gaped at his friend. "You still didn't realize-?"

"Realize what? Don't tell me you went through all that last year and you still don't have genuine feelings for her?"

Sirius laughed and shook his head. "Oh, Remus, you can be so oblivious. Come with me, I want to show you something."

He stood up and set the eggnogs on the end table so he could move Remus's notebook. Remus sighed and closed the notebook, set it on the bed, and stood. Sirius passed his friend one of the eggnogs.

"You're going to want this. I think a little buzz will help you."

Remus's caution was evident, but Sirius was having none of it. He grabbed his own drink and led Remus by the hand out of the room, into the hall, and back down the stairs. He nearly walked right into James, who led a laughing Lily toward the stairs. Lily's eyes were bright and her cheeks were red, and James was smiling like he'd just seen the sun for the first time in years.

"She's laughing at my quidditch figurines," James informed Sirius in quick words, "So I'm showing her the collection."

Sirius grinned and shook his head; both of them were intent on their goals. He maneuvered through the crowd, hearing Remus's mumbled apologies behind him, passing Peter dancing with Dorcas, spotting Marlene cozied up to a Ravenclaw Sirius didn't remember the name of. He moved on through the crowd and reached the small corner. Remus had apparently chugged his drink on the way, and looked at Sirius curiously.

"Why are we-?"

Sirius pointed up before Remus could finish the question. His heart pounded in his chest and his mouth was dry. This was the moment.

Remus glanced up and saw the mistletoe and when he turned back to Remus his expression was one of surprise.

Sirius grabbed Remus and pulled him close, burying his hands in Remus's hair, and crushed his lips to his. He moved his lips over Remus's, kissing with the passion of a year's restraint, his mind flickering to when he'd been kissing Marlene and wishing it was Remus. Remus tasted like chocolate and eggnog, and his lips were supple and unmoving- unmoving.

Sirius lurched back and looked at his friend. "That's why I don't have feelings for Marlene. I didn't- I mean- are you- do you-"

Before he could even stammer out his self-doubt, Remus grabbed Sirius by the neck and yanked him back, kissing him with unexpected ferocity. It was gnashing teeth and bitten lips and Sirius's back against the wall and Remus's hands tangled in his hair, bodies pressed close together, and it was tongues and exploration and it was evident Remus had restrained just as much as Sirius had and the final release of tension was all the more beautiful for it.

When they finally pulled apart, it took them both a moment to catch their breath. Remus faced Sirius with shining cobalt eyes, and Sirius stared back with cinder elation.

"You, too?"

"Only for you." Remus took a breath, still catching his breath. "How long have you…?"

"Since last Christmas."

Remus's eyebrows rose. "You, the one with the worst impulse problems, made it that long without spilling your secrets everywhere?"

"Oh, I mean, pretty much everyone else knew- Marlene, James, Peter, I even made a joke to Griffin Scamander once by accident. I also submitted an assignment to McGonagall with our initials sketched in the margin."

"Good Lord, when you said 'everyone', you really meant it." He shook his head. "Why not just tell me?"

"And have you reject me or stop being my friend? I'd risk my life for you, but I wouldn't risk losing you like that." Sirius cupped Remus's cheek in his hand and Remus's eyes fluttered for a moment as he leaned into Sirius's hold. Sirius's voice dropped to a whisper. "Sorry I didn't tell you before. I was afraid, and that's hard for me to admit."

"I know. It's the same reasons I didn't tell you. I didn't tell anyone else- I didn't ever want you to find out." A smile spread across Remus's face, the genuine kind that that had stolen Sirius's heart in the first place. "I'm glad I found out this way. How'd you find the courage?"

"Eggnog. James suggested the mistletoe as a joke, but I needed the alcohol to enforce the confidence."

Remus chuckled. "You've really got to stop taking jokes as serious suggestions."

"But Remus, if I hadn't taken it seriously, I wouldn't be where I am now." He kissed Remus's forehead, with ease as Remus was half a head shorter than him, "And where I am now," he kissed Remus's cheek, "Is bloody perfect."

He touched his lips to Remus's, kissing him one more time, long and slow this time, more tenderness than passion. Then-

"Oi, stop hogging the mistletoe! Go to your room or something!"

Sirius peeked out from the corner as Remus hid a red face in his chest. James stood with an exasperated Lily Evans walking away from him as though she'd realized his plan. James was grinning, drunken eyes shining, and raised his glass.

"Proud of you two! 'Bout time you stop mooning over each other in secret!"

"I'm killing both of you," Remus mumbled from Sirius's sweater.

Sirius just laughed and wrapped his arms around Remus. "Hey, Moony?"

"Yes, Padfoot?"

"Are we, like, boyfriends now?"

"If you want, Padfoot."

And he hugged his boyfriend under the mistletoe; all was perfect, if for a night, in Sirius's world.

l-l

[in messy scrawled handwriting on a weathered notebook]

the night is chaos

filled with moving bodies

dancing, drinking, diving under mistletoe

he kisses her

a reminder of my foolishness

he laughs, turns away,

i retreat

the night wanes on

the bass thrums below

he opens the door, persuading eyes-

should i go?

after midnight:

i owe clarity to mistletoe

who knew poison could prompt passion?

i owe an herb my happiness,

and as he sleeps on my arm i smile.

my shining star, the smile i dreamed-

finally, finally, it's all for me.