Third Edition – finally!
How long is this stupid answering going to go on for? It wastes my time!
You agreed to do it, so you have to stick it out until the end.
Hi Remus, Potter, Black-
Why do you call Moony by his first name and us by our last?
This is because Remus is my friend you two are more of acquaintances.
You are the kindest person I have ever met (sarcasm intended)
I think we could tell you were being sarcastic with out you pointing it out.
Can we start answering questions? I'm bored.
Your always bored when your not eating, fatso.
Q. What is the best thing that has ever happened to you?
Well, that's an easy one.
I don't know, but the best thing that WILL happen is when Lily will say 'I Do'.
Sorry to disappoint you but this little fantasy will never happen.
A boy can dream and wish until you are mine.
You will be dreaming and wishing for a long time, because I will never be yours.
Can I be best man? Pete can be bridesmaid he would look utterly fabulous in a dress.
Not likely Padfoot.
Why do you always bully Peter?
He is such an easy target.
I am not.
Go somewhere Black anywhere, but don't come back. Leave us in peace and tranquillity.
The best moment in my life was when I left my stinking family and went to live with James.
What has that got to do with the conversation?
I was answering the question!
Oh.
Ha I proved you wrong!
Yeah, for the first time in your life!
Whatever, antler boy.
Shut up!
Did I touch a nerve?
The best moment in my life was when I met Wormtail, Padfoot and Prongs.
Moony, your making me blush!
That's really sweet Remus! But I bet you get annoyed when you have that idiot taking the piss.
Mine is probably the time when I met you guys too.
See! I told you he has no ideas of his own! What a brainless twat!
Padfoot – too harsh.
Whatever, Evans what was the best moment in your life?
When she met me of course.
Not likely, Potter. Probably the time when I found out I was a witch.
Your just one letter off.
Didn't you always know you were a witch?
Peter, I'm muggleborn.
Idiot!
Leave him alone, Black. You're the shallow idiot.
You were thinking the same thing, he has known you since second year, and we are now in seventh year. Anyway, atleast I know I'm good looking, hot, fit-
Not to mention modest.
James, when was the best moment in your life?
When I met Lily, or when I was made Quidditch captain for Gryffindor.
Potter must you always mention me in everything?
Lily, everything about me, is to do with you.
Evans, spare all of our lives and just say YES!
He didn't ask me anything.
It was obvious he was going to ask you out.
Lily? Will you go out with me? PLEASE!
I will obviously say no if you beg.
Ok, don't go out with me, I never really liked you anyway. It was a joke between me and Padfoot.
Really?
Yup.
Lily, why do you look so sad?
She wants me.
I'm just shocked and relived that you're going to stop.
Lily, it was a joke! I love you more than anything! Why would I stop asking you out?!?
Just when I thought things were getting good.
Q. James and Sirius, how many people have asked you to go to the school dance?
Why would anyone ask them?
Well they could go for the fit bad boy or the Quidditch star. What's not to like?
Exactly, why go for someone 'average' when you can have the hottest guys in school?
Ha, Prongs. Remember yesterday when Pete said to that girl 'I don't have a date for the dance yet.' And she said-
'I can see why'. I was trying not to wet myself!
At your age Potter, I would have thought you would be potty trained.
My heart is bleeding now. :(
Cheer up Jay. You got asked to the dance yesterday.
Yeah I have already given definate maybes to six girls.
Well, I've turned down seven- including McGonagall.
If you two had any decency you would go with the first girl who asked you.
Why settle when I want to wait for you Lily Billy.
Call me that again and you will wake up breathing through a tube.
I never knew she was that scary Prongs! You're in for a rough ride!
As much as I would love to go with you Lils, I think I will go with that girl, Harriet. Remus who are you going with?
Well, Emma asked me a few days ago so-
Emma? You mean Emma Mason? I have been asking her to meet me in the broom closet for about a year. Tell her I'm amazing Moony!
To put it bluntly, no.
Why not?
That's probably because she asked Remus to go to the dance.
When she has me, why would she want Remus?
Black, that's probably because you're always after one thing!
I wonder, what could that 'one thing' be?
First years could be reading this Black!
Sirius, you know earlier? When you said that thing about McGonagall, you were lying right?
No, me and McGonagall are soul mates.
Why do you always go on about McGonagall?
For a woman in her sixties she is quite fit.
Padfoot, that's just wrong.
It's better than being gay, like you!
I am not gay you idiot.
Black, if Remus got asked out by a girl the other day, which he really likes. How can he be GAY?
God Evans, you have issues.
Not as much as you, Black.
Q. Sirius, I miss you sitting in front of me in transfiguration. Your hair used to flicker in the light, please move back. – tormented soul.
What's that for a question?
Obviously Prongs, someone else appreciates my perfect hair.
My hair is quite good now.
Only because you have been taking tips from me.
Still he has really good hair.
Mine is better.
Don't be so childish Pads, answer the question mate. Quidditch in ten.
I will not move, I am sorry to say. This is because McGonagall cannot see us very well from a distance. So you have two options, enjoy my hair from afar, or simply move behind me.
You shallow pig.
Whatever Evans, you're just jealous because you want to sit behind me, the gorgeous one.
What so I can't see above your humongous head?