Hi! Hope you are all happy. Unfortunately Bruce is less so. I'm sorry, this was a bit of a bleak chapter. I fear I may have to make change it to angst, given the way this fic seems to be headed.

This chapter the single I listened to was Daughter 'Smother'. I'll write more about it after.

Hope you enjoy (?).

~Daisy Xx

P.S. Reviews make my day!

July

2015

Solomon Islands

Dear Tasha,

I miss you. I miss you so much. Every time I think of you, I feel my insides plummet. I can't do this anymore, but I have no choice but to continue. I can't come back. Not for a while.

I feel empty. I'm a cracking shell, waiting for a final blow that will shatter me, only to discover there is nothing inside. I've felt the cracking for a long time now. Every minute of every day, I can feel a little piece of me being snapped off by guilt.

After Fiji I travelled to the Solomon Islands on a small plane. They didn't ask for a passport.

Since then I have done next to nothing. I've watched suns rise and suns set, tides come in and tides come out, monsoons begin and monsoons end. But mostly I've thought about you. How I must have crushed you. I think of Pietro. And every other person who has died solely because of me. The pain of having someone you love torn away from you. I've caused that. For hundreds of people.

I don't feel anymore. Nothing. I just exist. I barely eat or sleep or move. And I don't care if it stays like that. Everything is bleak and grey and cold. A barren moor, a desert, the deepest darkest parts of the ocean. That's all I am, and all I feel.

I don't want to be anymore.

I'm going to bury this letter in the ground, a grave I suppose. It'll disintegrate and become part of the soil and then maybe a tree will take nutrients from the soil, and respire and then the whole atmosphere will become this letter.

From,

Bruce.

Hi!

Hope you thought this was alright. I'm sorry it's got so bleak all of a sudden (though I'm not quite sure how you could make this joyful).

Anyway, my album for this chapter is Daughter's (I realise probably none of you bother listening to these- I never normally do!) 'If You Leave'. The lead's voice is truly haunting, as is the slightly folky electronic sound and the fairly depressive outlook on life shown in this album…(I sound like a very bad version of some music critic on the Sunday Times).

Anyway, Reviews make my day, so I'd love one if you have a minute!

~Daisy Xx

P.S. It's almost 5AM and it's reached that point where I just couldn't give a shit anymore. Oh well, it's a bank holiday…