Hey there!
Jen-M, it was a great suggestion, and it really did help me come up with this chapter. Let's see if you can spot your idea popping up.
Now, without further ado, onto the chapter!
Hai there
"Next is the Frog Prince."
"We could just watch the Disney movie..." Damian mumbled, but Steph heard it.
"What is it with you and Disney movies? You don't wanna watch any, do you?"
"Of course, I don't," Damian snapped at her. "Such an idiotic and childish thing would be a waste of time."
"Of course, we are listening to Dick retell a bunch of stories," Tim pointed out. Damian glared at all of them.
"It's better than listening to Gordon and Grayson singing," he said. Everyone laughed, almost drowning out the indignant cries of "hey" from said people.
"Who's the princess this time?" Cass asked when everyone had calmed down.
"Remember, these are my versions of the stories," said Dick. "So, I'm going to make it three princes."
"Huh? But why?" asked Steph.
"We had 5 of the 12 princesses in the last story. We need to make up for that," Dick said. "So, our 3 princes are Jay, Tim, and Dami."
He ignored the three boy's protests and began the story.
Once upon a time-
"Why do you start the stories that way?" Damian interrupted.
"Because that's how the story starts," Dick said. Damian wanted to say something to this but decided not to.
Once upon a time, there were three brothers who lived in a kingdom with their father and mother. Their father, Bruce-
"So, wait… first, father is poor-"
"And then he's rich?" Tim finished, joining Damian in his quest to annoy Dick as much as possible. They silently fist bumped as Dick sighed.
"King Bruce is Farmer Bruce's great great grandson and inherited the money the oatmeal pot gave them. He also happens to have a wife who happens to have the same name. They all happen to have the same name!" Dick said, seemingly in one breath.
"Alright," said Damian with a nonchalant shrug. "Please, continue."
Bruce was starting to stress out because his sons could never get along! And when they did get along, it was to annoy, irritate, prank, disturb him, and generally mess up his day!
Dick sent a glance his brother's way. Each boy averted their eyes, feeling no guilt.
One day, Bruce snapped. He said, in a calm voice, "Go play by the river!"
He also said, "And remember the list, or no dessert tonight."
Cue the dramatic gasps from the batboys, who knew that Dick was going to make the castle cook Alfred. No dessert would be worse than being checked over by Dr. Leslie Thompkins after a particularly nasty patrol.
And now, cue the shivers.
The list consisted of 5 very simple rules: no throwing food, no pretending your brother is invisible, no stabbing your brother, no pushing your brother in the river, and absolutely NO PRANKING EACH OTHER.
Of course, they disregarded all of these rules, because where's the fun in not pushing your brother into the river?
So, of course, they all pushed each other into the river.
Damian pushed Jay, who had pushed Tim, who, before being pushed, had managed to push Damian.
"Why would they push each other into the river?" asked Cass.
"Yeah… seems kinda pointless," Steph pointed out. Dick shot a smug look towards Tim, Damian, and Jason.
"I dunno… any thoughts guys?" He asked them. Tim cleared his throat uncomfortably, now understanding why Dick chose to make this story the way he was.
"I refuse to answer that," Jay deadpanned. Tim and Damian agreed with him immediately.
Because they were princes, and because they weren't used to doing anything without supervision, none of them knew how to swim. It didn't help that they were all yelling at each other.
Mysteriously, they were shoved into dry land by a massive wave! When the three boys turned around to see what had happened, they saw a cherry red frog sitting there, arms crossed, with an intense glare.
"Ooh! Who's the frog?!" Jay demanded. "Do we get to choose again?"
"No," Dick said immediately. "I learned my lesson from the last time I let you guys choose."
"So who is it?" Tim asked.
"Barbara."
"WHAT!?!?! Grayson, I will murder you!" Barbara shouted, launching herself at Dick, only to be caught by Cass and Steph. The boys were all laughing, and the smaller girls were red from trying not to laugh.
"Calm down Babs!" Dick said through huge gulps of air. "You're one of the most important characters in the story!"
Barbara crossed her arms and sat down with a stern expression on her face, turning a glare on Dick.
Tim leaned in towards Jason and Damian and mumbled, in the quietist voice he could manage: "just like the story."
The boys stifled a new flow of laughter.
"How did you guys end up in the river?" She asked the three princes.
"He pushed me!" All three boys yelled, pointing at whoever had pushed him.
"Why the heck would you do that?" She asked them, glaring harder.
"Because… why not?" Tim said, shrugging his shoulders. Obviously, none of them could come up with a good excuse as to why they would do such a thing.
The frog just glared at them a little longer. The boys were starting to get uncomfortable. Finally, she smiled, real big and innocent.
"Ok, here's the deal. If you let me live with you three, I'll pay attention and make sure you guys are getting along."
"No way, that's a lose-lose deal!" Said Tim.
"I could also make sure your father never finds out about the rule that you broke," said the frog.
"Are you blackmailing us?" Asked Jay.
"A better question is how you knew about those rules?" Damian asked. The frog just shrugged.
"I have my ways."
The boys ran back to the castle, probably hoping that the frog was all a hallucination.
That night, as everyone was sitting silently at the table, there was a loud knock at the door. The three boys sunk in their chairs, while the King was just confused.
The boys groaned in embarrassment when the frog hopped in.
"Wassup guys?" She asked.
"Um… who are you?" Bruce asked, because he didn't want to be rude.
"Yeah guys, let's not be rude to the frog who literally just trespassed in our castle," Jay said sarcastically. Tim snickered beside him.
"Oh, me? I'm just a frog!" Said the frog. "However, those three made a deal, and I fully intend to keep it."
At "those three" the boys had sunk so low in their chairs that they couldn't be seen over the table.
Without revealing the whole "shoved into the river" schist, the frog explained what she was talking about.
"Well, you three had better keep up the deal," said Bruce. "Besides, maybe something good will come from this."
So that night, the frog forced the three brothers to sleep in the same room. She was sleeping on a shelf in the corner so that they were in her line of sight. Needless to say, none of them slept very good.
"Well, would ANYONE sleep good with a frog watching their every move?" Damian pointed out. Barbara glared at Dick again, still not over the fact that she was the frog in the story.
The next day, the three princes saw the frog talking to the king and felt SERIOUSLY nervous, but they acted like they weren't bothered at all.
When they were finally alone, meaning with no frog watching them, they managed to converse.
"Ok, so, the frog decided to stay," Tim pointed out.
"Really? How could you tell?!" Jason asked him, all sarcasm.
"Focus. We need to get rid of that frog," said Damian.
"Well, it's not like we can kill it… that would be pretty heartless," said Tim, shooting a pointed look at Jason.
"So… we play the frog's game, pretend to get along, and it'll leave," said Jason, ignoring Tim.
"Sounds good to me," Damian said, nudging Tim.
"I'm in, as long as the frog leaves," he agreed.
For the rest of that week, the three boys went out of their way to get along, even when the frog wasn't there, because you never know.
By the end of the week, they hadn't pulled a single prank, yelled at each other, or broken one of Bruce's rules, which surprised everyone.
"Well, it seems like my job is done," said the frog. She had been spying on them when they thought she couldn't see them and deduced her mission complete.
But she wasn't finished. This sneaky little frog had one more trick up her sleeve. When the boys had all fallen asleep, she snuck out of the castle.
"What is she planning?" Steph asked, now totally invested in the story.
"You'll see," Dick said, waggling his fingers in her face and making her giggle.
You could imagine how excited the boys were when they woke up and realized the frog wasn't there. They could finally relax and get back to hating each other.
At breakfast, there was a knock at the door, and the boys got a little defensive. If that frog was back to keep blackmailing them, they were going to go insane!
Snickers at this. Apparently, the real-life versions of these boys agreed with their fictional selves.
When the doors opened, everyone was shocked to see a very pretty red-haired woman standing at the doorway. It was obvious from the clothes she wore that she didn't have very much money.
"Excuse me," she said. Her voice was a little high-pitched, but not so much to hurt peoples ears. "But, I was wondering if I could stay here tonight."
The boys all shared a glance then looked at the king. He smiled kindly at the woman and invited her to join them at the table.
Tim vaguely thought that there was something familiar about the girl but brushed it off.
"Idiot," said Tim. Everyone just stared at him.
"What?"
"Nothing," said Cass. They looked back at Dick, waiting for him to continue.
She told them her story, and they all felt more sympathy for her. Apparently, she was a poor girl who lived with her father. Her mother had died giving birth to her-
Barbara got a steely and defensive look in her eye when Dick said this, so he moved on quickly.*
So she had set out to find work so that she could get more money for her father.
Bruce decided he would help her out. If she could watch the boys when they went out to the river, which included making sure they didn't break his rules, he would pay her really good for her work.
Well, they were all by the river practicing with their weapons, when Damian's sword was knocked out of his hand and landed in the river. A week ago, his brothers would have just left him to get it himself, but they found themselves helping him get it.
The woman smiled and called them over.
"Well, I'm glad to see that my stalking worked," she told them.
"Stalking?" Jason asked, confused.
"Yep. I knew that blackmailing you would work," she said with a wink. The boys' jaws all dropped open.
"No way…"
"Are you…?"
She smiled at them and gave a dramatic bow.
"Yep! I'm the little frog who made you look like fools," she said.
"So… you don't really need the money for your dad?" Tim asked, feeling bad for his father.
"Kind of… I have an idiot brother that I live with, but he's on the other side of the kingdom, making sure people get along."
Everyone laughed at Jay's impression of Dick. Even Dick himself!
"Know what? That's part of the story now," he said. Everyone was laughing so hard that they didn't see or hear Tim whisper to Jay: "the idiot brother is Dick, isn't it?"
They also didn't see the small nod from Jay.
"Alright, next-"
"You didn't say The End!" Exclaimed Steph. Dick sighed.
"The End. Now, the next story is Cinderella."
Meep
Hope ya'll enjoyed it. Oh, and also, kudos if you got the "schist" reference from Percy Jackson!
I also don't know what happened to Barbara's mom, or if she's still alive or something, so plz let me know.