"Damnit, Daniel! Don't hang up on me!" Jack screamed at his phone. He knew it was no use, the phone had already disconnected. He dialed Daniel's cell again, but no one answered. He called the SGC and told Hammond to get someone tracking Daniel's cell phone call. Then he called Sam and Teal'c. "I'm coming over to get you. We're going on a search and rescue mission."
Daniel felt the phone ring. He almost left it on the forest floor, but decided it had come in handy having a light, he might need it again. He limped heavily until he found a stick he used to put his weight on. Not that I deserve it. I should have to suffer like everyone I have made suffer. Sha're… I'm sorry… I love you… I hope you know that…
He walked slowly, attempting to figure out where he had come from. He didn't want to die a slow painful death of starvation or being eaten by wolves or coyotes. Not that he didn't deserve it. The tears came back. Heavy tears. Many of them. A floodgate opened letting it all come. He sat, he couldn't see through them. Too many. He was tired… so tired.
Daniel shot up from where he lay. It had been a horrible nightmare. It played what Hathor had done, what he had done over and over again. He had lived through it over and over again. It renewed his hurt and his resolve to end it all. He felt a prickly itch on his arm and realized he was covered in pine needles. He could see them. See them? He looked up, squinting, as the sun shone through. He heard something. A voice. A couple voices. They seemed so far away but they hadn't been there before. He pulled himself up once again and continued traveling. This time, into the woods, at least he thought he was heading into the woods. This time away from the voices. He couldn't let them know… not yet… not until it was too late…
Jack had picked up Sam and Teal'c. The SGC had found out where Daniel's last phone call had come from and had called Jack. Daniel was somewhere in the woods north of the city. Jack couldn't imagine why. But now he understood why Daniel wasn't sure where he was. But what Daniel had said scared him. "I'm sorry Jack… Tell her I'm sorry." What did that mean? He hoped it didn't mean what he was thinking. It truly scared him, a feeling he was not well acquainted with.
Sam and Teal'c hadn't asked any questions. Presumably they knew what he meant. Presumably that meant that Teal'c had figured it out. The had driven to the edge of the city and then taken flashlights into the woods. There was little hope of finding Daniel, but they had the world's best tracker on their side. There was some hope.
Daniel hobbled. It hurt. Bad. It almost released the torment he felt inside. Almost. His nightmares no longer remained in the night. He could see Her with his waking eyes. Tired, hurting eyes. Nothing could block the memories. They blinded him with his own guilt and feelings on inferiority and weakness. Tears came and went. Now he was almost too tired to weep. He couldn't think straight. Not that he had since this event anyways.
I didn't deserve you, Sha're. I should never have come. None of this would have happened. I shouldn't have taken Catherine's offer. I should have lived on the streets until I could find a different job, a different town where no one knew me. This is all my fault! I should have been there to save you… God! All my fault! The wave a guilt he'd felt for years grew stronger and enveloped him. Nothing could be felt outside the terrible anguish. He was trapped in a world of pain and agony.
It had been an hour, or about that. Daniel had finally escaped the voices as he tried to avoid leaving a trace. They had been puzzled. He could tell. He managed to leave them behind. Far enough that he should be able to succeed in his dreaded deed before they caught up. I should have done this last night before they had even had the time to find me! He thought irritably at himself. Just one last thing to screw up, huh! Just couldn't help you're self! He pulled the knife out of the back pocket he had stored it in under his shirt. It caused some trouble as it caught on the threads it had been eating through. It had already created a small wholein his pant pocket. Time to get it over with, to end all pain and suffering for himself and his friends…
Jack had straightened up on his old aching knees. He was too old for this. God Daniel! Why are you doing this to me? Haven't we gone through enough already! He sighed. He was tired. Dead tired. He hadn't slept in… a long time…
"I believe Daniel Jackson when this way," Teal'c interrupted Jack's thoughts. Jack nodded. He knew that his team was just as tired as he was. Jack motioned for Teal'c to lead the way. He didn't honestly believe that he could keep the weariness from his voice.
Daniel felt cold. Everything was oozing from him. It hurt but no more than he deserved. Both his arms were slashed deeply. Another few minutes and he would be gone. He smiled sadly to himself. It's over, Sha're. It's over. Please forgive me. I didn't want her. I thought it was you… You…God I miss you… I never really realized just how much you meant until you were gone… I hope you are all right… I know that you can't be inside that… That monster! Not that I am much better than me... I betrayed you... I am a monster too... Blackness came. Finally a senseless blackness. Nothingness. Peace…