Gwen has been scrubbing the floor of Morgana's room for quite some time now. Her cracked hands are sore and worn as she dips more of the tethered towel into the murky water. As she looks down into the water half of her face is covered in shadows and the other parts reflecting in the water. She cannot help but to chuckle to herself, for this is a symbol of her life, some of it still shaded by shadows so that she cannot see what will occur. She wonders if this will be the rest of her life. Will she always be a prisoner to her status? Will she be the age of her father catering to Morgana while she has brunches outside smiling the sweet aroma of roses?
Gwen shakes her head and mumbles discourteous things to herself. This is what her life has come too. Gwen, a young woman that has always been taught to speak her mind. She is now afraid to share her opinions and knowledge because a woman of her status should no nothing. Her mother was a school teacher and taught Gwen everything from politics to arithmetic.
"Knowledge is the key to your freedom, my darling," Gwen's mother would whisper as she tucked her daughter into bed at night.
Gwen truly always believed that somehow she would use that knowledge to make her home a better place. She loves Camelot with all her heart she dares say she would die for her country. Yet, over the years Camelot has been slipping. Her father talked about how Camelot had been built on honesty, trust, and love. Slowly Uther is bringing hate and anger to the kingdom. He is like a poison slowly killing everything in his path.
"Gwen are you alright?" Gwen looks up from the bucket towards Morgana. She has been sitting at her vanity table starring at her goddess-like reflection in the mirror. She is wearing an emerald colored dress that causes her porcelain skin to look radiant. Her ebony hair has been pulled tightly back up into an elaborate bun. The planes of her lean cheekbones are clearly defined perfectly as the candle on her table burns with a golden glow. Gwen nods her head embarrassed that she has been taken away by a daydream. Her thoughts always seem to whisk her away to a far off place.
"Yes Milady, I apologize." Gwen continues to scrub the floors. They become so pearly and sparkly that she believes she can almost see her silhouette perfectly through them.
"Arthur said you would be a hard worker." Gwen rolls her eyes at the thought of Arthur. It has been two weeks sense she has been working this job and she hasn't seen Arthur once. A part of her wonders what he does with this massive castle as his home? She could never call such a big place her home. In all honestly the castle caused the hairs at the nape of her neck to stick up. This place holds so many demons and so much untold history. God only knew what lurked behind the walls of this castle. A part of her wanted to see Arthur so that she could confront him about describing her more like a pack mule that a lady. Sure at their first meeting her tongue had run away with her, but, she is still a lady and should be described as so. Maybe it is a good thing Arthur stays out of reach for Gwen fears that if she sees him again she may punch him in the stomach. This thought causes her lip to slowly twitch into a slight smile. She turns her head to stare out into the kingdom a pinkish orange glimmer is slowly beginning to set along the fields of Camelot. Gwen knows that it is evening and that her day has once again been stolen from her. Her eyes become moist at the thought of never being able to smell the sweet aroma of daisies or roll around in the grass. She is a lady now and she must act like one. Rolling around in the grass and playing in the mud is for pigs. At least that is what her father has constantly told her. Yet it draws her in like a moth to a light. There is something about the freedom of nature that beckons to her. Nothing can stop nature it is controlled by no man. Gwen likes that she likes the fact that something in her life that she loves so much could never be restrained. Memories of she and her brother playing in the creek causes her to feel a bitter sadness. She will not cry however, ladies are filled with an emotional stereotype and she will not fit into that mold.
Morgana catches the far off look in her eyes and it causes her to turn around the face her. Her pale pink lips purse as she begins to talk, "Gwen something is troubling you." Gwen looks up at Morgana briefly then back down at the rag in her hand. She continues to scrub another part of the floors on her hands and knees.
"Nothing is troubling me my lady." Morgana places her arm on her crossed knee and rests her chin there.
"Now my dear Gwen we are both ladies and I read you like an open dictionary. Now come, can we not discuss the weight that is on your heart?" Gwen will not stare at Morgana in the eyes. Something about those pools of emerald causes her to think less of herself. How could Gwen feel anything but homely next to the Princess Morgana. Morgana becomes impatient with Gwen's silence and takes this as her being rude. It the exact opposite to Gwen, she feels as if she is being polite. She doesn't want to bother the princess with nonsense and most importantly Gwen doesn't like to speak about her feelings, she'd rather keep them bottled inside of her. "I thought that we were beginning to develop a bond Gwen, at least a liking to each other." Gwen sighs as she places the cloth onto the floor. She looks up at Morgana who is giving her a pouty face. Gwen wipes her soaked hands along the dress of her skirt.
"Yes milady, you are correct. It is just I do not want to bother you with my peasant problems." Morgana chuckles slightly and it sounds like a whistle in the wind. Gwen hates her even her laugh is elegant and poised.
"I assure you Gwen that nothing in this world has enough weight to bother me. Come," She motions to the ground next to her "sit and let us talk." The last thing Gwen wants to do is talk. She wants to leave this castle and enjoy the little bit of time that she has. However, her job is to please the Lady Morgana and she knows that this whole gossip female bonding thing is all a part of it.
Gwen gets up and trudges over to Morgana plopping down next to her. "Now was that really so difficult?" Gwen shakes her head. "Now please let me know what is troubling you? Is it a suitor? You're in love aren't you!" Morgana's eye brows rise in delight like a school girl.
"Not exactly, it is about a boy but I am not in love."
"Oh, well please do continue." Gwen swallows hard. She begins to nervously pick at the loose strands of her canary colored dress.
"It is my brother Elyan, he has left my father and I." Morgana says nothing and Gwen concludes that she wants her to continue her story. "He left during the night two days ago. He only left a note saying that he has runaway to another town." Gwen sighs as she rips a strand from her dress off and twirls it around her pinky. "I fear something horrible has happened to him and there isn't anything I can do. And poor papa, he cannot sleep. Yet, all I can do is watch him. There is nothing else for me to do." Something in Morgana's eyes change as if the dark green catches the candlelight and takes on a lighter hue. Her voice is soft when she responds,
"You know Arthur is like a brother to me." Gwen nods her head,
"I know Milady." Morgana looks as if she wants to touch Gwen's shoulders or grab her hands but Gwen knows better. Morgana wouldn't dare touch her for the fear that she may get fleas or worse the poor curse.
"I could talk to Arthur, see if he would send of the knights to search for your brother." Gwen shakes her head immediately.
"No, that will not be necessary. Elyan has run away for a reason. He does not want to be found."
"Well, if you change your mind." Morgana whispers as she turns back round to face her reflection in the mirror. Morgana is pleased with herself as she stares at her reflection. She has done her good deed for the day and she is proud. "You may leave now. There isn't anything left for you to do." Gwen slowly gets up from off the floor. Her back pulsates in pain and she desperately wants to dive into the creek and let the cool water soothe her aching muscles.
"Thank you milady." Morgana nods her head.
Gwen walks out of Morgana's room and slowly shuts the door behind her. The candles along the stone walls burn bright in the dim light hallway. The castle always gives Gwen the creeps at night. She wraps her arms around her chest as she begins to make her daily routine back towards her cottage in the town. The wind from the open windows blows against her face and it causes a feeling of release to cascade through her. She is free now as free as the wind. She hears chattering and thinks nothing of it. Knights and servants always walk up and down these halls mostly to deliver food and gifts to the Lady Morgana. Turning the corner to another part of the castle she notices Arthur walking with a man she has never seen before. She stops in her tracks hoping that it isn't too late to turn around and run the other way. She does just that she turns on her heel about to flee. Before she can move she hears Arthur call out,
"Wait, you there stop." Gwen sighs annoyingly to herself as she turns around.
"Your highness," She mumbles forcing a disturbing smile. Arthur and the dark haired man walk closer to her. Gwen's memory of Arthur doesn't do him justice. His golden hair now sweeps to the side of his face like golden thread. His blue eyes stand out boldly against the darkness of the room. His lips twitch into a half smile as he notices her.
"I remember you."
"I would hope you jaw would not let you forget sire." Gwen sarcastically retorts. Arthur laughs and it sounds husky and throaty. The black haired boy looks at Arthur skeptically his dark caterpillar like eye brow raising as well.
"Well what happened? Care to explain?" Arthur immediately stops laughing and turns towards the boy.
"Not now Merlin." Merlin that is the name of this mysterious man beside Arthur. Gwen catches a glimpse of him momentarily and notes that his pale eyes, a little darker than Arthurs, clashes beautifully with his dark spill of midnight hair. His bone structure is perfectly defined on his small lean oval face and his voice is comforting to her ears. Arthur catches Gwen starring at Merlin and he only finds it impolite not to introduce them.
"Oh how loutish of me, this buffoon to the side of me is Merlin. This is…." Merlin rolls his eyes taking the insult and Gwen believes he hides his anger quite well. She admires him for that because if anyone called her a buffoon she would have made them regret their rash words.
"It would be wise not to upset, nor degrade your servants sire," Gwen blurts out, oh no, her tongue has run away with her again. Both Merlin and Arthur stare at her dumbfounded.
"Excuse me?" Arthur questions as if he is not sure that he has heard her correctly. Gwen bites her tongue she knows it is not her place to say anything. In fact, the remark wasn't even meant for her. She has a knack, a weak spot, for helping up for others who will not help up for themselves. "All I meant sire, is that if you wish to have loyal subjects you should grant them the same courtesy that they bestow upon you."
"Exactly!" Merlin blurts out turning towards Arthur with a smile of gold. Gwen smiles and nods her head. Arthur is struck by her frank words. No one has ever questioned his judgment. No one has ever talked to him in such a frank manner, no one but her.
Gwen curtseys and walks past the two men in a rushed manner. She has already gotten too involved in the situation and she knows that she should take her leave now. She smiles to herself as she passes them at least she knows she hasn't lost all her spark. Before she can turn the next corner Arthur calls out to her again.
"Wait, I still do not know your name." Gwen stops in her tracks her hands slowly ball into a little fist.
Hold your tongue Gwen… don't say anything you'll regret.
She turns around on her heel,
"Me sire, a mere servant of what importance could my name be to you?" Arthur becomes silent and Gwen knows that she has stumped him. No words spill out and she takes this as her cue to turn around and take her leave.