V.

Over the next couple of days, Sanji's sisters could tell there was something going on with him. He was always muttering under his breath—sometimes nothing more than a crude string of curses—and always looked angry, frustrated, as if suffering from a perpetual migraine. His movements were sharp and jerky, and the smiles he reserved for them seemed force, his praises of their beauty sounded hollow. They knew quite well that there was only one thing that could bring their brother so much trouble and grief: Sanji was in love.

It was painfully obvious that when, one night when Sanji was absent for dinner, King Zeff inquired gruffly, "What's going on with that son of mine?" the three sisters exchanged knowing glances.

"You mean you haven't realized yet, father?" Robin chuckled politely.

"Realized what?"

"It's the most obvious thing in the sea," Nami said with a clever twinkle in her eye.

"What is?"

"Father," Vivi started kindly, smiling, "Sanji is in love."

Zeff went utterly stiff.

"In…love?"

The king knew this would happen one day. Sanji was a growing merman, after all. He was bound to find an interest in something other than cooking eventually. But, well, Sanji was the heir to the Barantica throne, and he couldn't fall in love with just anybody. It had to be the right kind of mermaid—one that was classy and elegant, would be a good queen, one that would produce offspring worthy of a kingdom.

He had to know who it was, but he couldn't ask his son outright. They just didn't talk about things like that. It was embarrassing. So, he summoned Franky.

Chopper was swimming about happily, minding his own business, when he suddenly found himself in a bit of a predicament.

"So, the prince hasn't been anywhere in the past three days?"

Chopper struggled a little against the pincer/claw that held his fin, but the crab's grip was firm.

"Nope, nowhere!"

"Absolutely nowhere?"

"Absolutely!"

"Are you sure?"

"Yes! He hasn't been anywhere! Not since the night of the storm--!"

He froze, eyes widening. Busted.

"…And what happened on the night of the storm?"

Sanji was in his room, flipping through a cookbook he was trying to read. He was NOT, by any means, thinking of a prince. Named Zoro. He was NOT thinking of Prince Zoro because said Prince Zoro infuriated him. What kind of prince falls off his own ship and then falls asleep when he gets rescued? He must've been a complete moron. He wasn't worth thinking about. He was also NOT thinking about how annoyingly attractive he was, or how nice his hair felt, or anything like that.

Whatever thoughts he was NOT having quickly dissipated when the door to his room was knocked down by a seething King Zeff.

"Oi, old geezer, what do you think you're doing?" Sanji snapped, angry at this breach of privacy.

"What is this I hear about you saving a human?! Who was he?!"

Oh shit. Sanji tried to keep his voice calm, cool, steady—tried not to be too aggressive or hostile, too suspicious.

"He was no one. Just some idiot who fell overboard."

This explanation did not seem to soothe the king at all. He roared, "What did I tell you about going to the surface?!"

"He was drowning!"

"Then you should've let him drown!"

"I couldn't do that!"

"Why not?!"

"Because--!" Sanji stopped with a hard frown and averted his eyes, unable to answer.

This pause—whether it was from hesitation or uncertainty, anger or rebellion—only served to make King Zeff angrier, as it made clear that his worries and fears were true.

"Get out."

"What?"

"I said, get out! Get lost! If you care about humans so much, then go! I don't want you here! Dinner is always late and your cooking isn't even that good! Leave!"

He'd barely finished his yelling when Sanji was pushing past him, tailfin flicking furiously as he went.

"Sanji?" Chopper asked, surprised when the merman swam by.

But Sanji didn't stop, just kept going, even as hot tears dripped down his cheeks, instantly swept away by the undersea current.

Chopper and Franky, feeling guilty, both caught up to Sanji eventually, when his swimming had slowed and he was resting silently on a small stretch of reef.

"Sanji?"

He glanced at them once with disinterest.

"Go back to the palace," Franky said. "Give the old man time to chill. You don't belong out here, bro."

Sanji didn't answer, slowly and aimlessly wringing his hands in the lap of his fin. Chopper swam up to look him in the face, to try and hold his attention.

"Sanji, what are you going to do?"

If you care about humans so much…

Sanji's hands clenched into fists and he met Chopper's stare suddenly, decidedly.

"I'm going to see the sea witch."

VI.

Kureha the sea witch lived in a precariously placed cove at the bottom of an underwater trench. She had lived there for many, many, many years perfecting her potions and spells. It was rumored that she could do just about anything, but very few went to her, because as powerful as she was, she was also very frightening.

When Sanji entered the witch's cove, he just missed being hit in the head by an empty liquor bottle

"Who is it?" A creaking, cackling voice demanded to know. "What do you want?"

"My name's Sanji," he said, undeterred, despite Chopper and Franky's wary whispers of caution behind him. "I heard that you can do almost anything."

"I can," the voice laughed. "What is it you need?"

"I need to know if—" Here his confidence faltered, not out of fear of her, but fear of what it was he desired. "—if you can turn me into a human."

"A human?"

There was a faint sound of clattering and the peaceful water stirred, and then appeared the sea witch, dark purple tentacles moving restlessly about her. She took a swig from the new bottle she held in her hand, swallowing the liquid audibly. She eyed Sanji carefully as she lowered the rim of the bottle from her mouth.

"Why would you, prince, want to be a human?"

"I—" Sanji wavered, then frowned. "I don't need to explain myself to you!"

"Hey!" Kureha scowled back at him, pointing the bottle at him threateningly. "You show some respect for a young woman like me!"

"Who's a young woman?"

Sanji ducked in order to dodge the bottle.

"I don't need to help you, you know."

"Okay, okay!" Sanji straightened up. "I—There's this guy I kept from drowning a few days ago. A—human guy. And I—"

"Ah," Kureha smirked with understanding and amusement. "I see, then." She looked around the cove thoughtfully, before she moved about, tentacles writhing swiftly, taking down vials of mysterious substances and mixing them together in an intact empty bottle. "All right, prince. This potion you will drink, and it will give you a full human body. You will have this body for a period of three days—"

"What?"

"Fine, three weeks. You have that much time to get your lover boy to kiss you. If he doesn't, you will turn into sea foam."

"Sea foam?" Sanji cringed.

Kureha nodded and looked at Sanji with her eyebrow raised. She held out the bottle.

"You still want this?"

"Yes," Sanji replied, reaching out for the potion.

She jerked the bottle away just before his fingers reached it.

"Now hold on. I do demand payment."

"But I didn't bring any—"

"Money isn't the only form of payment."

Sanji eyed her, skeptical.

"What is it you want?"

The smile that spread across her face was wicked, pure wicked; it was a smile so conniving that it made Sanji fully understand why so many merpeople kept their distance from the sea witch.

"What I want from you is…your voice."

Sanji's eyes widened, his hand going to his throat on instinct. Behind him, Chopper and Franky gasped and shook their heads violently.

"But…without my voice, how can I…?"

"Trust me, kid," Kureha snapped. "In your case, it'll help you more than hurt you. Now do we have a deal?"

Sanji didn't answer right away. He closed his eyes, thought of his beautiful sisters who he might never see again; thought of his father who had raised him his whole life and who, despite his tendency to be harsh with his words, Sanji owed so much to. But then he thought of that foreign skin and green hair beneath his fingertips; thought of the way it felt to hold the human prince's body against him. He made his decision, and with Chopper and Franky watching with a mixture of hope and fear as he met the sea witch's eyes, he said, "Yes."

Kureha's grin was back and she thrust the bottle into his hand.

"Then drink up."

Sanji raised the bottle to his lips, tilted his head back, and let the potion pour into his mouth and down his throat, swallowing heavily while Chopper and Franky looked on, horrified.

"Oh, I should warn you, it might sting a little."

Sanji dropped the bottle, a sharp stabbing feeling shooting up his body. He doubled over in pain, groaning, gasping even as he could feel his throat going tight and sore, "A sting?! It feels like—like—"

"Like being gored up your ass?" Kureha smirked. "You might wanna get used to that."

Through the pain—and perhaps adding it—Sanji could feel his body changing. His fin was disappearing and was being replaced by two long, pale, separate limbs; there was a new, strange feeling in his chest, something stretching, expanding, and the suddenly contracting. He heard the sea witch cackle and Chopper called out his name before his eyes fell shut and water surged into his open mouth.