Note to Readers:

The Holocaust was no joke. There was a very good reason that the creator omitted it from the Hetalia: Axis Powers anime, manga and webcomics.

Daring reader, I now present to you the Hetalian Holocaust, in all of its graphic detail.

(I own nothing in this fic,by the way).

Once again I was called to my boss's office for some other awful purpose. What now? Forcibly seize another country into my house? As if Austria wasn't bad enough... Or maybe he was going to force me to... ugh I didn't even want to think about it...

"Deutschland, you are aware of the Jewish problem, am I correct?"

I sighed. This boss had a pathological hatred for Jews, and many other things, for that matter. "Very much so, mein Fuhrer. Are you ready to implement the Final Solution?"

"Yes, tomorrow you are to report to Auschwitz for a physical exam. You need to be purged of your Judaism."

"B-but mein Fuhrer, I am not Jewish! I am Protestant!"

"Chiefly, yes, but parts of you are Jewish. And those parts need to be, ahem, cleansed."

I went home and I screamed into a fancy pillow that Austria made for me. "That verdammte - I wish he would die! One of these days I swear I am going to kill him - shoot him while he's off guard, or put him in jail, or poison him..."

"Calm down, Germany, it's not that bad," Austria said as he was sipping his chamomile tea.

"NOT THAT BAD? He's trying to get rid of a significant part of me! Probably painfully! Who knows what he will do - shave me? Experiment on me? Burn me? Cut me? Castrate me?"

"I was there yesterday. You'll be fine; trust me."

Austria smiled and took another sip of tea.

"Oh, and by the way, do you think you can fix me some coffee? Fresh-ground Italian roast, if you don't mind."

Perhaps I should poison Austria...

And so the next day I reported to that awful camp. Something about the place just didn't feel right...

"Hallo, Germany, I am doctor Prussia, kesese, and I am going to give you a physical to make sure that you aren't disabled or Slavic or Jewish or homo or anything like that."

UGH! ANYBODY but Prussia! Of course he would go along with my boss's ways...

"I swear, doctor, I am perfectly Aryan-"

"OPEN WIDE!"

Prussia peeked inside my mouth with a flashlight and a popsicle stick. "Hmm, no Jewish teeth, that's good, otherwise they would have to be extracted."

He shone the light in my eye. "Splendid. A beautiful Aryan blue."

He picked his fingers through my hair. "Blonde, all the way down to the roots. Superb."

He checked my muscles. "Everything appears to work right, so there won't be any need for an operation."

He gave me an x-ray and looked at my bones. "Beautiful Caucasoid bone structure."

"Okay, Mister Germany, it appears that you are indeed one hundred percent Aryan."

What a relief.

"However, I KNOW that you have Jewish in you somewhere, so they must be in the one part of your body that hasn't yet been inspected, kesese..."

Uh oh. CASTRATION ALERT!

Prussia dragged me unwillingly to the door to what looked like a sauna, but I got the gut feeling it was something far worse, such as an operating room.

"Quit fighting, goddamnit! You'll have hell to pay from Der Fuhrer if you don't comply..."

He shoved me into the room, while he stood outside peeking through the window like a voyeur and kesesesing.

"Now see that picture of Jesus on the wall? You are to jerk off at it, doctor's orders."

"WHAT? You can't be serious! That is blasphemous!"

"But the Jew in you won't care, he thinks Jesus is just another man. Now all you have to do is wank off enough cum to purge all the Jewishness - not to mention the queerness - out of your system and you're free to go."

"Are you serious? You aren't going to... castrate me or anything?"

"No, kesesesese... Had to castrate Poland though, his balls had WAAAY too much Jewish in them. He didn't mind so much, since he already thinks he's a girl, kesesesese...

"Oh, and I almost forgot THESE!" Prussia threw in a dreidel and a menorah with candles. I suppose that he is expecting me to use these as sex toys; wouldn't a cross make more sense?

"Would you at least give me my privacy?"

"Oh, sure, kesesese..."

Prussia disappeared from the window. I didn't trust him to really give me my privacy, but I figured, I might as well get it over with.

I stripped myself completely and looked at the picture of Jesus. I'll think of it as a form of worship instead of desecration. Scratch that; it's not really even desecration, it's just a picture, so to sanctify it would be idolatry.

He was kind of a sexy man, I guess...

I imagined him without the angelic white robe on. The visual resembled the David, but hairier, and of course anatomically accurate.

But the dick was small - so I imagined it to be bigger.

My dick was starting to swell.

I looked at the dreidel. Of what use could that possibly be for this purpose? It was way too fat to shove up my ass. The markings were inaccurate, and it wasn't even made out of real wood. I threw it at the wall.

It cracked open, and then I found out that it was actually a lube capsule.

I took one of the candles out of the menorah and dipped it in the lube and stuck it into my ass. It was too skinny, being like a little wax birthday candle that is stuffed into a cake (of course the menorah would be inaccurate as well) so I lubed and shoved a few other candles up there.

I squeezed down on the candles. My rectum began to swallow a few of them. Surprisingly, the swallowing felt kind of good.

My dick got really hard. I tried to shove it into my tightly clenched fist while I was looking at the Jesus, imagining shoving it up his tight virgin asshole...

"Oh Lord..." The Jesus in my mind was simply... divine. Jewish precum was dripping out.

I seized the menorah, now empty of candles, and shoved it into my asshole. The hard metal scratched against my prostate, and I got closer and closer to cumming...

I farted, and all the candles that had been swallowed halfway up the colon came out. The pressure of all of those candles in my rectum was painful, but in a divine way...

I screamed, "HALLELUJAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!"

I squirted a massive load of Jewish cum onto the floor. There. I am done.

"Bravo, West! BRAVO!"

I knew it! That damn Prussia was watching me the whole time! Dr. Prussia ran in and shook my hand for a second before wiping it off on his clothes, saying, "Eeeww, Jews!"

He held the door open and commanded me to exit.

"Now, Germany, you will need to take a shower to wash the remainder of the Jewish spermies off of you."

"But wasn't I just in a shower room?"

"No, West, you don't want to use THIS shower room. Here, lemme show you why..."

Prussia pressed a button and the inside of the chamber was sprayed with volumes and volumes of gas which, judging by the sickening almondlike scent that was leaking out, was hydrogen cyanide.

"It's a sterilization chamber," Prussia explained. "Anything infected with Jews needs to be sterilized and what better to sterilize it with than PRUSSIC ACID! Awesome name, by the way, kesesese..."

I kind of feel sorry for all of the poor Jewish sperm that are being gassed...