Forbidden Lust: Unexpected Encounter
A Novella: By Benjamin Hale
Point Of View: Alex Dunphy
**I apologize for taking down the second chapter late last week. There were some issues with the post that I had to fix. I will be posting chapter four today as well so three chapters in total. Hope everyone is enjoying their week**
The high I received Sunday night from making a change in myself carried over well into Mondy. My enthusiasm and excitement for the possibility of seeing my crush and actually having the courage to make a move on him carried me through the day of hard tests and discouraging assignments. Even the prospect of this uplifted me, and though I went through nearly half the day without seeing him I was happy to find that my overall spirits were lifted. Haley was nice enough to send me a motivational message before my first class, giving me more power and strength.
My day, however, would take a turn as I got called down to the principal's office after my fifth period. I nervously made the walk, excused from class for what I had to assume was nothing good. I panicked a little bit when the teacher called my name. I am usually far away from any and all trouble at school, so to get this cryptic summons was somewhat unsettling to me. Though logically I knew I hadn't done anything wrong, there is always that period of time you sit in the office running through every possible thing you could have messed up. I was no exception to this rule, for the entirety of the six minutes I sat in wait, I ran through everything I could have done wrong.
The receptionist, a nice woman with long brown hair, called my name, and I was taken to a back room I had never been in before. I took a seat at the desk and waited some more. This time much shorter than before until the door opened to reveal my guidance counselor. A wave of relief came over me as he stepped into the door. Mr. Oxlan was always a refreshing sight for me to see, for I knew whenever I saw him I would be void of trouble. Though I was confused as to why we were meeting in the school's office I stood up and greeted him with a smile.
"Miss Dunphy." He began every engagement we had before putting a folder down on the desk "I'm sorry about the arrangments but they've conveniently decided to renovate my office this week."
"No worries." I tell him quietly "Kind of threw me for a loop though."
"Got something you want to tell me about?" He smiles taking a seat.
"No, sir." I nervously laugh fixing my hair "Nothing of the sort."
With formalities out of the way, and the calming sensation of knowing that I had not screwed something up beyond my own repair, The nature of our conversation took a rather dark turn. Supposedly, unknown to me. I had been placed in two of the wrong classes. They were to easy for me. American History Honors and Honors Bio. I kind of had a suspicion of this when I saw my schedule at the beginning of the year, but I didn't think much of it giving my lackluster A- last year in AP Chem and World Civ led me to miss the cut on AP classes this year. I guess it wasn't the case, and I listened as Mr. Oxlan explained this to me.
"The system is designed to set a particular score mark for reaching AP classes. Last year we renovated the system over the summer, and some of that data was last. We had to go back to paper records until just last week when we realized we had placed you in the wrong classes." He apologetically states to me "I know this sucks, and I am sorry about the confusion in which we've seen to bring you today, but we would like to move you into both of these AP classes starting as soon as tomorrow." The man comments to me as my eyes widen.
I didn't really know what to say. I was taken aback in some respects due to my growing suspicion of how I would manage a full course load of AP classes, especially now that I am jumping into them late. I'm not so much worried about the actual change or the coursework, more so the makeup work that I am going to be forced to do most likely. It unsettles me a little bit, but I hold my head up high and try to look enthusiastic around the change.
"What would we be talking in terms of course load?" I express my doubt "With midterms coming up I really wouldn't want to overwork myself right out the gate with these classes."
"I've talked to your prospective teachers and tried my best to reiterate these concerns to them, as I know you so well." The man holds his hands up to my laughter "You would probably get a little bit of work to catch up on, take some tests and quizzes after the winter break but mostly just jump in where they left off. I think both your teachers and I feel as though you can handle to course load without issue."
"I appreciate that." I look up to him. My mind now put to ease as he hands me the revised schedule and sends me on my way. Off to complete my last day of school before my new schedule is implemented.
My mother was thrilled to hear this news. I pick and choose what to tell her, and this was one of those things I knew she would love to hear about from me. She almost jumped for joy when I told her, both her and my father is very supportive of the decision to move me to an upper level of class based upon my growing educational sphere. It would have surprised me if they weren't and I'm more then thrilled to have made them proud with my efforts and the correction of what could have been a crucial mistake in continuing my pursuance of Yale.
The next day I focused a lot on moving my attention to catching up in these classes. The thought of my crush being in one of them crossed my mind, but I was not sold on the idea as I packed up my things and headed off to school. It was one of the reasons why I didn't want to occupy my mind with the worry of that Sunday night and take myself away from the much-needed attention of my studies. While that night was fun, and its reliance still echoed through my mind with growing intensity as the days passed, the awkward night of interaction really did concern me. Such a hard balance between work and play, I was thrown for a loop this week. While I wanted so badly to express myself and make a fun change in my life, things just didn't seem to work out that way for me, and I was thrown back into the midst of my studies as if I had never left them to begin with.
My first class would be in the third period, with my last class being my sixth period. Second period I had a test, giving me little worry about what would happen the third. It seems I have this weird ability to turn things off in my mind when I need to focus, a gift of sorts to me I don't have any idea where I could have got. I guess my desire to achieve and improve myself outshined my ability to worry about some arbitrary thing that didn't really matter all that much to me. I would face that fight when it came, not worry about the unknown before it happens.
Coming to the end of my second-period class I did my best to calm my nerves before entering my next class. I always seem to get nervous but today it seemed to shine a whole lot brighter for some reason. I had this weird feeling. May it be joining the class late into the semester or just nerves before joining a really hard history class, I did what I could to calm my nerves before heading into the class and putting on my laser focus.
Call it an intuition or what not, but as soon as I walked through the classroom my eyes drew left, focusing upon the very person id' been chasing the last week or so of my life. The person I'd gone out and put myself out there for sat left row close to the door back three seats, and there were two seats positioned directly around him. I was shaking, to say the least, as I quickly averted my vision and headed to the teacher's desk, where I introduced myself and collect a tivy of classwork I'd missed in the months prior. It's not all that much, but it's still enough for me to be somewhat concerned about my ability to finish before the midterms come my way.
Once I am done talking to the teacher, I turn and face the class. Of course, since I am more than two months late to class by this point, everyone stares at me in confusion as to why I am here. I know they are harmless, many of the people I'd shared other classes within the past. That gives me a sense of ease as I walk down the far aisle, approaching the man with every step. As he comes to clearer recognition I am taken aback by just how incredibly beautiful he is. His hair just as soft and luscious as I remember. His eyes like pools of love just begging me to pounce. I want him so bad I can feel it building in my body, yet I make no move yet. I have to be calculated.
I don't want my first move in this class to be an advance on a boy that I like. I need to watch and wait. Find my perfect time. I instead take a seat next to Stacy, someone who I don't know personally, but has been in almost every one of my classes since the beginning of high school. She brings me a weird sense of comfort, and I capitalize on it as soon as I can, taking out my notebook and pen along with the sorting through of the papers I received, going over them amidst a continuous look over of my undying crush, his head now out of his phone and on the teacher.
Never would I have thought I'd see him here, especially in an AP style class. Not that he doesn't seem smart, he just did not strike me as someone who would achieve this level. There are plenty of hot guys in these classes, in fact, some of the hotter I've seen in my day. But him? I just didn't see it. Usually, the kids in here are brute, harsh, and so competitive they think any kind of attraction or kindness to them is an exploited weakness, making it almost impossible to make friends with them amidst the torrent of their endless attacks. But him, that's not the case.
Once class begins I focus in on the work. I am in no position to be behind, for I am already behind enough. The class is midway through the second world war, one of my favorite subjects seconds to science and math. I catch on quick where we are and find the time to do a little bit of the work I was provided. Things seem to be going alright. I keep my eye on my crush, the only way I can refer to him now aside from coming up with some sad pathetic nickname that would just ruin it for me in my head. I can tell by the way he is sitting and paying so close attention that he doesn't have many friends in the class. I haven't yet seen him acknowledge one person aside from the teacher and another guy, but that's been it. This gives me a potential opening for me to talk with him at least in the future.
"Alex." A voice whispers next to me, catching me off guard as I break my trance from the prolonged paragraph I was pretending to so intently focus on "Did Hoffman give you the class notes?" I turn to Stacy with confusion.
"No." I shrug in confusion "He only gave me these papers." I hand her the pile as she goes through them intently for all of three seconds before handing them back to my desk.
"You're going to want the class notes. They're important to the analysis of power paper we have due next week,"
"Do you know where I can get them?" I ask leaning down as the teacher corrects papers amidst a host of whispering students amongst one another in some kind of silent pow wow.
"I can share mine with you." The girl smiles "I'll send them to your E-Mail address when I get home."
"Thank you." I smile in full appreciation of the girl's efforts.
"Don't worry about it." We exchange a smile "If you have any questions don't hesitate to ask."
As soon as she says that I tap her on the shoulder, catching her attention in some fearful way. We gave each other a look, which was only escalated by the frantic look on my face. I shouldn't have made it so obvious to her that I was practically bursting at the seems to know anything about the boy i liked, but for some reason, I made it far to clear, and the result of such was worse then I would have thought.
"Something wrong?" The girl hesitantly asks, as if she were unsure of what to say.
"No." I dart my vision away before she can read any more of my facial structures as to suggest that something was wrong "I'm just thinking." I lie as the girl gives me a sympathetic nod.
"It must be hard for you." Stacy comments as I lean back in my chair "Coming here to this new class forced to really adapt yourself on such short notice. I can't even imagine."
I simply nod to her comments without really knowing what to say. I constantly bounce back and forth between whether or not I should say something to her. I bounce back and forth between this for a couple minutes, unsure of whether or not I actually trust her enough to tell her something of that caliber. I learned earlier in my days of school that I shouldn't tell people things. It never seems to end well for me. Though I can in some way establish reasonable doubt, and an installation of false trust, I am just too worried about it to make a deal out of it.
Class continues on and I do my best to pay attention. Times seems to crawl past as we reach the halfway mark, which will finally allow me time to remove myself and think of something to do. I've never really been one to make a huge deal out of things, especially this. But for some reason, my mind is hooked on it, and I just can't seem to figure out a way to get past it without causing some kind of problem for me. Stacy would be no help, and Haley is off with her boyfriend somewhere in the north of the state so she probably won't respond. I do my best to calm myself and focus on the matters at hand, but my mind is just too cluttered for me to do that.
With ten minutes left I'm beginning to feel a lot better about things. I'm finally at the point where I've got over my initial fears of the unknown and am starting to enjoy myself a little more. A quick writing assignment followed by some reading and lecturing have helped me to take my mind off the situation at hand. Everything seems to be going well until our teacher stands up and hands out a sheet, this detailing a group project we will have to start. My heart sinks. While we can pick our own partners I am sure that everyone has already decided who they will be working with, leaving me in the weird position of having to find someone on the fly.
The class is ended early so we can meet up and work with someone. I am almost sure I will have to work with him, for no one has gone over yet, leaving really just him and I to have not been picked. It's almost as if some weird force has taken over my life to where everything is falling in place for me to make a move. First I get put in his class then I am forced to work with him. I'm not one for believing in god but its hard for me not to think that something greater isn't at foot right now. If I can overcome my initial fears of being with him, maybe I can make something happen.
Standing up with the class to get partners, I decided I am going to keep things strictly professional. I am in no position to make a move yet. I would need to get comfortable with him. Of course, this really negates what Haley had told me to do by just going for it and hoping for the best result. He is in my class and if something were to happen it would utterly ruin the both of us in some way. Grabbing the things I head over to his desk, catching him writing things down on a piece of paper. His body so perfectly situated in the seat with broad shoulders and soft face. He is intimidating in so many ways, but I swallow my fear and approach him none the less.
"Hey." I smile warmly like, his head raising to catch my gaze as he leans back with a half smirk of his own.
"How are you doing?" He asks as if he doesn't know me. Maybe he doesn't? That would be really awkward if it were to be the case, something I would have to deal with in some capacity later on.
"I'm good." I nervously shift my body weight back and forth "Just wondering if you wanted to work with me on this project." I look around the room "Seems like every one taken by now."
"That's usually how it goes." The man smiles at me "But yeah, I'll do this thing with you."
My heart skips a beat as I take a seat in front of him. I look around at all the other groups continuing to meet up and talk, going over classwork and beginning to plan out their project. Maybe I should have pushed to group with Stacy since she is a friend of mine and I know how she works. Instead, I am stuck here with this now silent and very reserved boy. I guess I'm up for the challenge of balancing work and play if anything.
"You just joined this class today?" The man asks me leaning forward.
"Yes." I smile at him "Alex Dunphy."
"Vince Cambell." He responds as I swoon over the lust of his dream boy name.
"Nice to meet you." I blush awkwardly, his eyebrows squinting slightly as if he were trying to zone in on something that was to be stuck on my face, drawing a fearful look upon my face.
"I'm sorry." He smiles sitting back "I just feel like we've met somewhere."
Do I play stupid for him? If I were to tell him the story of how he protected me from Robbie then it might make this whole thing look premeditated. I try to play off a confused look as we both try to nail it down. My heart races as I think of something to say. Things are going pretty well by this point and I do not want to lose the chance I have just yet to some stupid, misguided comment I could easily avoid.
"Maybe in passing," I tell him, warranting a nod.
"You didn't happen to be at the arcade Sunday night?" My heart sinks down into my stomach "I was picking up ice cream for my mom and I swear I saw someone who looked just like you sitting on the couch."
"I don't know." I laugh nervously "I was there with my sister around seven or so."
"Wow." He leans back scratching his neck "What a small word."
"Yeah." I smile rubbing my shoulder "Really is."
There is an awkward silence. I hate it when things like this happen because I have no means by which to control what happens next. I guess that's true for everything, but the awkward silence always brings about an evaluation of what you said and how you could have done so much better in saying something different. I look over some of my papers the professor handed me as we reach five minutes to the bell. If I can get through this last five minutes I'll be set.
"For the project." The teen's deep voice snaps me from my thought "Since we have to focus on one of the major powers of the second world war, I was thinking we could do Japan." I nod as he slides me a packet "I've found that their scope of influence and the devotion to victory throughout their time-fighting in Asia and the Pacific is worth noting over the Germans control in Europe or Italy's fascist rule." He flips to a page in the back "They did this interview with a former commander on this page. Really interesting stuff."
I'm almost shocked by the way he talks. This guy gives me so much confusion I don't know what to do with it all. First, he is protective and outspoken, then he is quiet and reserved, now he is smart and logical? I'm almost ready to pop the question now I'm so excited to be with him. I hold back though. The golden gloss of the outside may hide some rotten, ugly mole on the inside that'll just overpower everything. In reading the article through quickly, I find that it is indeed a rather interesting piece of writing, and I agree to work on it with him.
"Really?" He questions me as if to not believe it "I'm glad you like it." I nod in approval "Most people in here have discredited me before I've passed halfway through my speech."
"I think that incorporating everyone's opinion is how the best projects are aced." I somewhat lie to him. While I would not go so far as to discredit him and make him feel bad, there is a time and place for letting people know the criticisms you have against their work. Right now is just not that time for me.
"So you want to meet up sometime? Get working on this?" He asks me out of the blue.
I fumble for a second, unsure of what to say. "Yeah." I nod with a smile "What works for you?"
"I was thinking tonight." The boy leans back in his seat, a whiff of his cologne filling my nose "We don't have to though. I was just thinking we could get a head start on it is all."
He must have seen my rather worried face. I wouldn't know if tonight was going to work. I certainly would not want to bring him home to my place this soon. My mother would never allow that to begin with. Besides, with Luke and Dad up to their usual series and Haley out doing whatever she's doing, I would find it hard to focus anyways. Though I would like to be naive and keep things innocent I'm not sure how well I could control myself around him for long. Even sitting here I find it hard to keep myself from grasping him and never letting go. To think I would somehow be able to manage myself around him for two hours of work would be near impossible for me.
"I'm sure tonight could work." I speak against my better judgment "I just don't know what my parents are doing for dinner and my brother is all over the place. My older sister is just, ya know?"
"Oh, I know." Vince smiles to me closing his textbook and taking my wrist, his skin so soft against mine I don't bother to protest to his removal of a pen cap and some forced writing on the back of my hand. He smiles at me as he examines the work, raising his eyebrows with an exacerbated sigh "Could have done that a lot better." He shakes his head in disapproval as I examine the ten digits on my hand "Shoot me a text and let me know."
"You don't have anything going on?" I ask suddenly, his face looking up to mine with confusion as I realize the implication of my question, my heart starting to beat rapidly as he places his stuff in his backpack.
"No." He shrugs "I'll be at the gym most likely. Visit some of my friends at Moneray park." He smiles just as the bell rings to dismiss the class "I'll be around though. Shoot me a text if you can and I'll swing over."
I can't help but feel like he's trying to get with me as I slowly pack my things up and head to my next class. That's what I want? Right? Or is it something else? Why else would he tell me he wants to swing by on the whim of a text message if he didn't have something sexual planted in his head? I worry that's why he's been so nice to me. I always worry that's why guys are nice to me, but I like to think I'm more than just a body for their personal pleasure. I know I am more then that, and I would undoubtedly refuse to engage him if such were to occur. I may have fallen for his lust but I'm not going to revert a principal of mine because of that. I can stay strong.