3. Perfectly Rich, Perfectly Evil

"Master, Sir, you have a guest," a JackBot informed its creator.

"Dr. Patience is here? Outstanding! Show her in!"

The JackBot saluted and hovered away. It signaled to another Bot to signal to the one at the front door. Jack was seated in a high-backed chair behind his broad, black table, waiting with his fingertips pressed together in a business-like manner.

Patience came down the ill-lit stairs against the wall, leaving a wedge of light to shoot through the doorway until a JackBot closed it. She was just a tall, lean shadow until she stepped into Jack's halo of light over his desk.

"Dr. Patience, I presume? Please, take a seat."

Patience scrutinized Jack for a moment before taking her place in the chair a JackBot pushed up behind her.

"I thought you were older," was the first thing she said.

"Hey, I'm older now than I've ever been!" Jack retorted without missing a beat.

Patience cleared her throat.

"Of course. Now, Spicer," she began, placing her black bag beside her feet, "On my way over, I took a quick look at the Xiaolin Temple you mentioned. Unfortunately, I couldn't take one of my own jets this time, so the scanning system was less than incompetent. But, at the very least I know where the place is. So, what, exactly, about that place has you stumped?"

"Well, I suppose you could say it's more the people inside the Temple, than the Temple itself, that have caused all the trouble," said Jack with what sounded like a mix between snide sarcasm and the air of a celebrity on a talk show. "See, there are these four Xiaolin Monks who've been training there ever since I first began looking for Shen Gong Wu. At first, they weren't such a problem. We were pretty evenly matched. I lost a few, I won a few more. But, then, they kind of upgraded, or something, because they kept gaining all these new, annoying powers, and my JackBots seem to break easier and easier every time I fought those punks! And then there's Chase and Wuya and- thank God Hannibal Bean is gone- and a slew of other interferences that pop up once in a while." Jack was on his feet by now, pacing behind his desk. "So, I still have a few Wu left, but now I'm more interested in just taking over the world. The Wu are a distraction."

"And you want my counsel?"

"Exactly."

Patience crossed one leg and folded her hands in her lap.

"Do you even know who I am?"

The question seemed to puzzle Jack, but he told her what he'd heard as he took his seat again.

"You're a former member of the World-Around Legal Monopoly of Aristocratic, Ruthless Trustees, aren't you? It's only the most evil cooperation to date!"

Patience grinned and nodded slightly.

"Yes, the Trustees, otherwise known as WalMart, was my line of work."

Patience was very lean, with dark eyes and short, dark hair tucked behind her ears. She wore a gray, three-piece pinstripe suit, watch chain and all. She wore no make up, jewelry, or accessories of any kind. She had a strangely ageless look to her, a trait that seemed familiar to Jack, but one he couldn't quite place. She didn't look nearly as evil as Jack had expected her to.

"Now," she continued, "I've retired from that and I spend my time spreading evil one patient at a time."

"Oh, yeah, you're a doctor," Jack recalled. "Um, just what kind of doctor are you?"

Patience couldn't help but laugh in her throat.

"I was hoping you would ask. I'm an oral surgeon."

Jack cringed at the title.

"Ooh, very evil."

"I'm also an engineer, Spicer, so I think I can give your robots the extra kick they need."

"So, you'll partner up?" Jack assumed, perking up a bit.

Patience, too, cringed faintly.

"No, but I will advise you on an 'as-needed' basis…on one condition," she added.

"Shoot."

It was Dr. Patience's turn to put her fingertips together.

"You mentioned him earlier. What do you know about Chase Young?"

"Chase?" Jack drummed his fingers on the table irritably. "Aw, he hates me with a vengeance. Sometimes he doesn't try to kill me, but we aren't even frienemies!" He was about to give her a quick run down of all Chase's plotting since their first encounter, but Patience held up her hand to stop him.

"Chase hates you? Consider that a good thing, Jack. In a strange, strange way, consider it a good thing." She paused for a moment as she got to her feet. "I'll help you try to take over the world. But, don't think you'll find easy sailing once you're past the Xiaolin Monks. You'll still have the militaries of thousands of countries to either break down or pretend of ally yourself with. And, of course, you'll need to get by Rupert Murdoc, all the major fast-food chains, the fashion industry, and the First Untied Church of Christ, Allah, Buddha, Spongebob, and all the other Flying Spaghetti Monsters in the world."

"I can handle 'em!" Jack declared, jumping back to his feet. "All it takes is money!"

"Wiser words were never spoken," Patience said with sarcasm Jack didn't notice. "If you think you have what it takes, I'll see you to the top, Spicer."

Jack and Patience shook hands over the table to seal the deal.

"You know, Jack, when I first walked in here, I thought you were your secretary."