Title: The Dating Game
Author: Robin
Spoilers: This takes place after EOT, so anything through that is fair game.
Disclaimer: I worship at the altar of Janet Evanovich. I own nothing and am making nothing from this. Please don't sue.
Chapter Two
Huh? I shook my head like a ball point pen that's running out of ink in an attempt to restart my brain. What was that?
"What was that?" I asked again, out loud this time.
"Well, the guys and I wanted to know if you if you'd go out with us."
"I am out with you guys," I said, my confusion telegraphed by the wrinkling of my forehead. I'd had too much beer for brain teasers tonight.
"No what I mean is, that we would each like to take you out. Like on a date."
I spun around to look at Lester. "What, so you guys work together, live together, date together? Shit I don't know what Morelli wrote in the men's room at Mario's, but I do not do group sex. What kind of girl do you think I am?" I was starting to get irate. I may be desperate, but I still have some scruples. Although, don't get me wrong these men were mighty fine. Don't even go there, Stephanie. Mental head thwack.
Lester was trying to suppress his laughter. "No, Beautiful, that's not what I mean either. Calm down and let me try to explain what I do mean."
"Explain fast," I said, crossing by arms over my chest and glaring.
"See, the thing is. Well, we were talking the other day and one of us mentioned that we wanted to ask you out. But, it turns out we had all been thinking along those lines and were waiting…"
"Waiting? For what?"
"For you to be ready."
"Ready?"
"Yeah. Anyway. Like I was saying, all of us are interested in dating you, but we didn't want it to cause problems with the team. So we made an agreement."
"Oh, you made an agreement. And what was this agreement? You all draw straws and see who gets me? Take turns different days of the week. Tank on Mondays, Bobby on Tuesdays, oh and I get Sundays all to myself since there are only six of you. Or are we talking about the whole RangeMan team, I mean there can't be more that 25 of you guys, that gives you what? Each a shot once a month? Why stop there, why don't we just pimp me out to the guys in Boston and Miami and Atlanta. Fuck! I can be one the damned perks of employment at RangeMan. Of course someone's gonna have to take over my day job 'cause I'll be too tired from fucking all the Rangemen on the eastern seaboard!" My voice had been steadily rising and by now we had attracted the attention of all the Merry Men and several other patrons as well. I lowered my voice and gritted out, "I hate to break it to you, but I'm the only one who gets to choose who I date."
"It's not like that." Lester said soothingly, like he was talking to a wild animal. "You get to choose. It is all your choice. Who you date, if you date, all of it. We just wanted to give each other a fair shot at being your choice. Set some rules of engagement, that sort of thing. We didn't want there to be an all out war over you. 'Cause believe me, if that's what it comes down to, it won't be pretty and we'll all be looking for new employment."
Rules of engagement. Shit. Who were these guys that they couldn't just ask a girl out without it becoming some kind of military campaign? I took a deep breath and tried to calm down. A little piece of my rational self knew that I was blowing this out of proportion. Maybe it was the yoga I was doing four days a week, maybe it was that I didn't want to continue the unhealthy pattern of me going into rhino-mode every time I had a disagreement with a man. In either case, I physically willed myself calm. Plus, now that I thought about it, it was kind of flattering to have six hot guys all vying for my company. "So, what's your plan?" I asked finally.
Lester looked a little relieved that I wasn't yelling anymore. He must have heard about my fights with Morelli, too.
"Well, we thought it could be a little like The Dating Game. Remember, the girl would go out on three different first dates and then decide who she wanted to be with? So, we were thinking, we could each take you on a first date. Separately. And at the end, you could decide who you wanted to continue seeing. That is if you are interested in seeing any of us ever again after this mess."
"And what happens when I choose one guy over the others?"
"The rest of us back off. That's the agreement. The winner gets to continue to see you for as long as you both want, and the losers get the memory of a lovely date with Ms. Plum."
"Hm. Sounds like you guys have it all figured out. So, how did you get elected to present this 'proposal' to me?"
"I drew the short straw," Lester said while flashing me a grin.
"I knew it!"
"The upside is if you agree to this, I get to take you out first. And I don't intend to make it easy for the rest of them to measure up."
Oh Boy.
I woke up in my bed around 8AM the next morning wondering why gnomes were digging in my head. Ah, yes now I remember. Beer. Too much. Beer bad.
I groaned and rolled on my stomach burying my head under my pillow. And then I remembered that today was Lisa's birthday and I was supposed to go over early to help Valerie keep the kids busy while she finished up the last minute party details. Shit. Wonderful, a hangover with screaming children. At least there'd be cake. But it also meant that I needed to get moving. No sleeping in today.
I grabbed head my after I sat up too quickly, remembering I'd left my car at the Hayward building last night. Double shit.
Shortly after Lester had made his less that decent proposal, he drove me to my apartment since I wasn't really in any shape to drive myself. Bobby was almost equally plastered so he caught a ride directly back to RangeMan with the rest of the guys. Tank was the only other sober driver because evidently it takes a lot more than a couple pitchers of beer to get Tank tanked.
The ride was a little uncomfortable as I realized that Lester had pretty much declared that he wanted to go out with me. Actually, that was exactly what he declared he just also declared that five of his closest friends wanted to go out with me, too.
When we got to my parking lot, Lester's hand on my arm kept me from bolting out of the car into the relative safety of my apartment. I looked over at him, meeting his eyes for the first time since we'd left Shorty's.
"I'm sorry Stephanie, if I've made you uncomfortable with me. I'd like to go out with you, but I also don't want you to feel awkward at the office. If you decide you aren't interested, it's okay. We'll all go on like before and I swear none of us will ever mention it again." His eyes were serious and he held my gaze for long moments before I replied.
"It's okay Lester. I had a really fun time tonight. I'll think about it. Talk to you Monday," I squeezed the hand that was resting on my arm and moved out of the car with as much grace as the three or four beers in my system would allow.
"Do you need help getting inside?" Lester asked through the open passenger window.
"I don't think so Mr. Santos. And don't you start breaking your own rules of engagement. I don't think the other guys would be pleased if I let you into my apartment, of if your vehicle stays here for too much longer." I gave him a grin that told him I'd heard the grumbles from some of the less sober guys, Woody and Bobby in particular; that they didn't think it was fair that Lester got to drive me home. I'd heard Tank call into the command center to have them activate Lester's tracking device saying to the men that it'd be the easiest way to ensure that the rules of engagement weren't violated.
"So, are you going to fill me in on these rules?"
Lester smiled and shook his head slowly, "Nah, I think we'll let you figure them out as we go. Call me tomorrow if you need a ride in to get your car."
So here I am now. Hung over and stranded. I guess it's time to call Dad, cause there's no way that I'm calling Lester.
A little over an hour later, I was standing in front of the garage to the RangeMan building, waving goodbye to my dad. I think he enjoys any excuse to escape the house and my grandmother. I walked into the garage toward my car. I've been driving a used Miada again since I was now making a pretty decent steady income. It is red and cute and I've had it for five whole months without blowing it up.
I gave the guys on security detail a little finger wave via the security camera mostly so I was sure they knew it was me and they didn't deploy any counter-measures thinking I was an intruder. Who knows, they probably have tear gas or poison darts ready to take out anyone who didn't belong in the building. I made my way over to my car and was preparing to turn the engine over when the elevator opened.
I looked up to see Ranger step out and my heart did a little flip. Maybe he had seen me on the monitors and wanted to say hello. Yeah, as if he hasn't had a thousand opportunities in the past months to talk to me if he really wanted to. Get a grip, Steph.
It only took me a moment to realize that he hadn't seen me and that he wasn't alone.
Following Ranger off of the elevator was a beautiful woman. She was petite, maybe 5'2", with long, sleek dark hair, pouty lips and perfect mocha latte skin much like Ranger's. She was laughing at something she and Ranger were discussing, her head tossed back, completely at ease. She was dressed in a tailored navy business suit, the buttons of her blouse were unbuttoned to a point that while not immodest, wasn't exactly professional either. Ranger was carrying her jacket and she was carrying her sling-back high heels by their straps, her feet were bare. Clearly she'd spent the night. Holy Mother of God.
He walked her to a car that I didn't recognize situated in one of Ranger's reserved spots next to the elevator. She leaned up and gave him a hug and he smiled at her and kissed her forehead. I couldn't hear their conversation because I was too far away and because I was in my car, but mostly because the sound of my blood rushing through my head was overwhelming. I needed to get away before I witnessed anything else. I didn't think I'd survive. I swallowed convulsively trying to remove the lump in my throat and to settle the bile that was threatening to rise. I sucked in a deep breath and willed myself not to cry. Not yet. Not while I was here where it would all be caught on camera.
With that thought, I started my car, attracting Ranger's attention for the first time. Maybe you need to be a little more aware of your surroundings, Babe, I thought nastily. I threw my car into gear and tore out of the garage. I glanced in the rearview mirror in time to catch the woman's confusion and Ranger staring after me in complete shock.