Chapter 3: Reid
Spencer Reid's POV

For one of the first times in my life, the minute I stepped foot on the plane, I let my mind shut almost completely off. I'd done so much thinking during the last week that if I didn't know better, I'd believe that my brain was actually hurting from all the activity. All I wanted now was to curl up, close my eyes, and sleep—hard. Of course, I knew that sleep was probably going to be impossible. We'd seen too much this week. Peaceful sleep wouldn't occur for some time. Rationally, I knew that my body would eventually crash and shut down temporarily. Leaving my mind open to the nightmares was something I was hoping I could avoid for a while.

I sighed as I sat down in one of the seats across the aisle from Morgan. He looked as exhausted as I felt. I shoved my bag to the floor and leaned the seat back, eyes wide open, staring up at the ceiling of the plane. I felt, more than heard, the rest of the team clamor aboard and claim their seats. The plane took off with me clutching the armrests, hoping no one would notice the anxiety I still had every time we began or ended a flight. No one was doing much talking, aside from Morgan, who seemed to be having a hushed conversation with an equally tired Garcia back at Quantico. He quickly finished his conversation, and the enclosed space was quiet once again.

A few minutes later, I heard his phone ring again, and I smiled a little bit to myself. I was sure it was Garcia again. Twenty seconds later, my phone rang, and I quirked an eyebrow, wondering who was calling me, of all people. Worried that it might be news about my mother, I quickly grabbed it off my belt and opened it, barely aware of continual ringing throughout the plane.

"Spencer Reid," I said anxiously.

"Hi, honey," my girlfriend's voice said softly.

Austin and I had been seeing each other since a case last year in her hometown, and she'd recently moved up to the D.C. area to finish college. She was even thinking of going to law school.

"Austin! I thought you were at work." I was relieved that she sounded okay, but curious as to why she was home and calling me.

"I switched with Sherry for tonight so I could be here when you got home. Penelope called earlier and said it had been a really rough case and that you would probably appreciate a phone call."

I hummed a soft noise of agreement and smiled. A phone call was most definitely appreciated.

"How are you, Spence?" I realized that Austin sounded a little worried.

I wasn't quite sure how to answer. "Umm, I'm okay. Not thinking about using, if that's what you meant." I could feel the defensiveness creeping into my voice and quickly worked to tamp it down. I'd told Austin about my history with Dilaudid shortly after we became serious, and she'd been very supportive. She, along with my team, had every right to be concerned about me slipping into old habits, especially after a case this rough, and I knew that I had no right to be defensive about it.

"Oh, no, Spencer! That's not what I meant at all. I trust you to tell one of us if that becomes an issue, really. I just meant..." She sighed quietly. "I just meant that I know how hard this case was, and I wanted to let you know that I'm here if you need to talk to someone. I know I'm not a member of the team, or law enforcement in general, but I want you to feel like you can talk to me if you're particularly bothered about a case. And geez, if there were ever a case to be particularly bothered by, it would be this one. Penelope didn't give me a lot of details, but she did tell me enough so I would know what was going on." Her voice trailed off again, sounding worried.

"Thank you, babe. I'm just really, really tired. I guess I'm worried about nightmares coming up if I fall asleep, so I'm afraid to close my eyes. Is that normal? Statistically speaking—"

She interrupted. "Chill, honey. Of course it's normal! You look around that plane, and I guarantee every single one of those people in there with you will have at least one nightmare from this case. You can't let that stop you from sleeping, though. You know, even more so than I do, that sleep is the best thing for your body and your mind after all the stress it's been under this last week. Your body and mind need time to slow down and relax. Yes, you may get nightmares. Heck, you probably will get nightmares. If you fall asleep on the plane and wake up with nightmares, wake someone up. You can always call me, no matter what time it is, and I'll talk to you until you calm down. Penelope told me months ago that Derek has them regularly, even more so since everything came out in the open in Chicago and then again after the New York City ambulance bomb. He would gladly talk to you if you wake up with one. JJ would, as well. Jeez, Spencer, everyone on the plane will understand exactly how you're feeling. So please, for me, get some sleep and ask someone for help if you wake up with a nightmare, okay?"

I laughed softly. I'm not sure she'd taken a single breath while giving me that speech. "Okay, I promise. Umm, how are you doing?" I knew she worried about me while I was gone on cases, and combine that with the worries of school and work...I knew she probably wasn't sleeping much herself.

Sighing, she answered, "I'm okay. I'm exhausted, as always, but I'll try to get some rest while I wait for you to get home. There's no way I'll be able to really sleep until I see you home safe and sound. Other than that, I'm good. School went well today. I've already finished all the schoolwork I'll need for the weekend."

I smiled. "Yes, please try to get some rest. Thank you, Austin. For calling and for believing in me. I think I'll go to a meeting when I get back to town before going home to sleep. I'm not feeling any urges right now, but I think I'll need the support after I get home and try to sleep."

"That's good, baby. If you need company, I'm more than willing to ride along with you and wait out in the car for you. Just give me a shout, okay?"

"Thank you. I think I'll be okay, but I appreciate the offer."

I yawned loudly enough that Austin heard me and laughed.

"Okay, close your eyes and sleep now, sweetie. Call me if you wake up with a nightmare and need the company. Otherwise, I'll see you when you get home."

"Mkay. I love you," I said quietly before hanging up the phone and clipping it back on my belt.

I took a quick glance around and saw that a few people were still on the phone, but several were already asleep. I smiled, feeling comforted by their presence, and then closed my eyes and fell asleep more quickly than I'd believed I could have.