Steven bringing me the groceries
instead of Eddie , lead me only to
believe. Eddie didn't care about us
anymore . Maybe he hated me for getting pregnant and trapping him.
Looking at Steven putting away the groceries I had to ask...
" have you seen him?"
( Steven turns and looks at me )
" no loren I haven't ...he called me and told me he was gonna be in the studio all day and asked if I could get the groceries you guys need ...is everything alright with you guys ?"
Is everything alright ? Didn't Eddie tell them our marriage is over because he's acting like a little boy?
Why didn't he tell jake and Steven about us ? About the divorce papers he had drawn up and made me sign. He tells them everything .
Maybe the whole divorce thing / marriage means nothing to him , like it's all a bad dream he's wish he woken up from.
Who the hell really knows what he's thinking .. All I know is .. I wouldn't take any of it back. The song writing contest , passing out in front of everyone at the club that night , when I found out I won. Working with Eddie , falling in love with him at the same time. Getting kelly as my manager , her taking my career to the next level . Eddie getting kidnapped only for him to notice he had been in love with me the whole time , while he was gone. Getting him back working on our careers . Getting married , living in sin while on the road . Our careers sky rocketing to the top. Me getting pregnant, getting Eddie to go continue the tour while I was stuck at home . Delivering our beautiful baby boy.
If none of that ever happened , I wouldn't have Declan . My little man was the best thing in the whole to ever happen to me.
Sure I'm alone and raising Declan with out Eddie by my side but hey . Not all happy ever afters go on with out having problems along the way .
I could help thinking about all of it while Steven was here waiting for an answer.
"Loren? You all right?"
Faking a smile to Steven." Yeah I'm good just exhausted ... Thanks for bringing the groceries . I'll finish up"
" okay but hey you need anything give me a call."
" will do Steven thanks."
Walking home to the door was weird he just kept staring at me . Opening the door Steven walked out and just looked at me and said.
" take care of your self loren."
All I could do was nod as he turned and left. closing the door hearing Declan through the baby monitor and appreciating that he was still asleep I decided to sit on the sofa to Just think,"Why is it everybody keeps telling me to take care of my self?"
I'm doing just fine , Declan and I are as happy as can be... Sure Declan and I haven't left the house since he's been born but that's normal... At least I think. It feels normal to me
So what if Declan and I haven't left the house ? It not a big deal to me .. 3 months isn't that long, Everyone else says it's not normal . Mom, max, Mel , Ian , kelly... Eddie.
They all say I've become a hermit. But they don't understand .