A/N: Disclaimer: I own neither Dr. Who, Torchwood, or Hellsing.

Also I had to eadit this chapter myself, so please excuse the errors, it will be fixed when my regular editor gets the time.

Warning: the Following Chapter contains a bit of Captain/Schrödinger lemon. If that's not your cup of tea you can skip past that part. Otherwise, enjoy!

III

The hallway of the sublevel of the U.N.I.T. facility hidden away in London was brightly lit as two figure moves slowly down the hall, counting the cells. "1138, 1139, 1140…" began the tall chubby bald man of about 35 years as he slowly lumbered past the cells. His counterpart, a lively short Indian woman sped ahead of him to cell 1145. She began to type on a small keypad next to the door causing it to slide open.

"In here asshole, I swear to God I think you must have ridden the short bus as a kid!" the woman sighed stepping into the room, her blubbery compatriot following shortly behind. Closing the door behind him the large man stepped over to the coffin shaped cryostasis unit.

"You're the brains, girly, I'm the brawn." he chuckled before putting his fist through the glass viewing panel and pulling the lid off with all his strength. Within seconds a red light filled the room and a claxon began to sound. A tall figure slowly sat up from his prison and cracked his neck before slowly stepping out of the confines of the machine he had been held in for so long. The two other's in the room saluted him the only way they felt proper,

"Heil Hitler!" the boomed in unison arms triumphantly outstretched, in a salute the world hopped would have long since been forgotten. The other figure nodded with respect but inwardly wondered if the Reich was scrapping the bottom of the barrel, since they were clearly allowing the Untermenschen (1) membership these days. But then again they did it the last time the battalion was reconstructed, and it seemed nothing changed.

"Sir, the speaker sends his regards," the woman began, "and he would be honored if you would grace him with your presence." The woman handed the former prisoner an envelope. "The address is in there, as well as an invitation to a party he's holding" She smiled before turning around to open the door. Unluckily for her the door locked just as she reached for it, and the room began to fill with nerve gas. As the two would-be prison breakers, gasped and struggled for air, a voice came over a hidden intercom in the ceiling,

"Prisoner 1145, your escape ends here, prepare to be terminated."

The figure simply stared into the ceiling as he thought to himself, They're going to make this hard? Perfect.

Gwen had just reentered the Torchwood facility greeted as usual by the sirens that signaled the opening of the large gear shaped door. It seemed like some any other day. Lois was updating software and checking the various camera feeds from the parameter of the building, Rhys was napping on the couch, Martha was monitoring rift activity while simultaneously filling out medical reports, and Johnson was discussing something with Jack, and he was where he always was, in his office.

Suddenly, Jack bounded into the room clapping his hands twice to get everyone's attention as Johnson followed behind him, albeit at a slower pace,. "Alright people, you've seen the news," Jack began, "the royals are calling a round table conference to decide what to do, which means we have to go, or more specifically I have to go." Jack chuckled as he began to pace in between Gwen and Johnson while Martha stepped into the examination room after opening her cell phone. Jack nevertheless continued, "I'm taking you all however whether they like it or not. Last time we had one of these this gorgeous noblewoman brought- never mind, I'm getting ahead of myself."

Jack smiled even as there was an audible groan simultaneously released from the assembled members, Jack had gotten distracted by a trip down memory lane for the thousandth time. It never failed to happen daily. Surprisingly he quickly regained composure and returned to his briefing, "Therefore, Johnson, you've got bodyguard duty, Gwen you'll be confirming information we present, Lois, bring the laptop with any documents you've found, Martha I need a readout of all the rift activity within the last 48 hours and Rhys," He said with his normal charming grin as he patted the hefty Welshman on the shoulder, "you'll be driving!"

"What why am I always driving? Ya never let me go on but a few missions, and when ya do I'm always drivin'!" Rhys was fuming, Jack sighed,

"Do you have the highest National Security Clarence?"

"No." Rhys said a bit surprised, What could be so important that required such a high level of security? He wondered as Jack continued,

"Then I guess you're driving"

A large argument would have broken out between Jack, Rhys, and Gwen had Martha not intervened with information that outweighed everything, even the Roundtable Conference. "Jack that was U.N.I.T. they have an emergency!"U.N.I.T. would never call upon torchwood unless something was far out of their control.

This isn't going to end well is it? Jack mentally sighed as the Torchwood team rushed to their vehicle. He had no idea how right he was.

It was already late in the evening when the Torchwood vehicle pulled alongside of the U.N.I.T. facility. What appeared to be a rundown factory was actually home to one of U.N.I.T.'s newest prison facilities. Much like Torchwood, U.N.I.T. was apt at hiding in plain sight. The team, with the exception of Rhys, exited their vehicle and were met at the entrance by a younger man in a officer's uniform…

"Torchwood right? Lt. Davis. Follow me if you would." The man led them into a long hallway inside the entrance to the building. The sounds of battle were heard distantly underneath the floor. The younger officer spoke with a grim determination, but the stress of the current situation was apparent. "The situation began about five hours ago on sublevel eleven, we've got the prisoner pinned down on sublevel five, but," he paused rubbing his face, searching for the right words, "We've taken several dozen casualties, and we can't risk anymore."

After what seemed to be just over a minute the Lieutenant led the Torchwood team into what appeared to be the control room. Screens covered the far wall while a handful of officers were monitoring the camera feed from all around the base. A voice spoke out from the watchmen.

"Lt. Davis, the prisoner has reached sublevel four and retrieved his belongings from the lockup. ETA here fifteen minutes."

The images on the various screens unnerved even the members of Torchwood bloody chunks of human flesh and bone were cast about, fresh and dried blood was splattered across the walls, and beheaded and dismembered corpses of the soldiers unlucky enough to be caught by whatever this creature was littered the ground. As the assembled group watched, a large figure moved into the view of on of camera. It was warming a large faded dark green greatcoat with the collar pulled up around it's mouth and what looked to be a German army cap from World War II, complete with the Totenkopf symbol of the SS.

The figure paused for a moment and looked directly toward the camera. Jack felt his heart skip a beat, not out of love or admiration, but out of fear, the type of primal fear one feels in the depths of a nightmare. The piecing sky blue eyes which showed little to no emotion, the platinum-blonde bangs which peeked out of the hat and almost reached his eyes triggered his memory, Jack knew fully who he was looking at and what would happen if the man reached them. Jack drew his revolver from his jacket before heading toward the stairs, giving orders along the way.

"Gwen, Martha, Johnson, Lois, go back to the Car and get Rhys to drive you to Buckingham Palace and start the meeting without me," He began as he passed by Lt. Davis and handed him a earpiece. "Mr. Davis, I want you to evacuate all personnel and keep me informed of the prisoner's position."

The U.N.I.T. officer saluted Jack, "Good luck sir, from what we gleaned about the prisoner for your records you'll need it" Jack clenched his teeth in rage at the somewhat mocking tone of the young U.N.I.T officer, as he headed to the closest stairwell.

The third sub-level of the U.N.I.T. complex was more akin to a scene from an action movie rather than the office complex it had once been. Corpses and bullet holes littered the halls of the complex and only a small handful of solders had barricaded themselves in front of the stairs using whatever they could find, shelves, spare cubical walls, a loose door, and even desks. They came down as a group of twenty, there were only five left.

Most of the casualties had been sustained when the order to evacuate was handed down, however the prisoner seemed to ignore the civilians, firing upon the armed personnel only. The remaining soldiers couched behind the barricade firing at the large figure slowly approaching from the other end of the hall.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck!" a solder screeched in terror just before the top of his skull was shattered by a well placed shot from an extremely long barreled gun. Before the rest of the solders could react they were distracted by a metal clang, which to their horror was the sound of a Model 24 Stielhandgranate meting the ground behind the barricade.. Within seconds it went off, blowing the shoddy defense to smithereens and coating the area in a red mist of gore and blood. The former prisoner moved through the massacre unmoved.

Jack hurried down the stairs following the sound of the gunfire and an explosion. He was trailed closely by Gwen, who was clearly distraught. "Jack please," she begged, "let me help, let us help," Jack raised his hand pointing behind him toward the door, but Gwen remained obstinate. "I'm not leaving until I know you're safe." Suddenly, Jack spun around, Gwen was expecting to be berated, instead Jack's face showed nothing but fear.

"Gwen, the only reason I'm down here is to buy U.N.I.T. and the rest of the team time. He's going to kill me…maybe several times.".

"Jack-" his faithful compatriot began before being silenced by Torchwood's leader,

"GWEN SHUT UP!" he bellowed, his face distorted in anger, but his eyes conveyed a sense of genuine concern as his voice dropped to nearly a whisper. "The man down there isn't an alien, or mutant, or an inter-dimensional being, he's a monster, an honest to God monster" Gwen raised a questioning eyebrow. Jack had yelled at her so often it no longer shocked her, but an actual monster? That was ridiculous. At that moment, the two Torchwood operatives were alerted to the sound of a metal door swinging open beneath them. Simultaneously, Jack's earpiece sounded with the worried voice of Lt. Davis,

Jack, he's coming toward you.

Right then, Jack began to notice the rhythmic, slow tapping of leather boots against the metal staircase, four flights below him but moving closer steadily. Without missing a beat, Jack readied his gun and kept it aimed at the bottom of the stairs. The sound of the heavy boots thudding against the metal stairs continued to grow in strength. Within seconds the large figure from the security cameras turned the corner and examined the situation.

He was outnumbered, and they had an elevated position, a minor annoyance for sure but nothing which couldn't be overcome. Close quarters and the angle of the stairs would prevent him from using his grenades and Mausers, so the best bet would be hand-to-hand combat. Very slowly the prisoner removed his hat, weapons, save for a large combat knife, and coat and laid them in a corner. He would need as much mobility as possible. He was dressed in only a pair of green combat pants with matching suspenders, white gloves and a pair of worn jackboots.

Gwen drew he gun nervously, the prisoner was even more intimidating than the security feed had made him look. At eight feet tall the prisoner's body was rippled with muscle and his face bore an emotionless, cold, expression. As for Jack, if he was nervous he didn't show it. Instead a small smirk creped across his face as he spoke. "Thought that was you Hans, I don't suppose I could get you to walk back to your cell and just behave?"Hans's only response was to tilt his head slightly to the side before he cracked his neck and got into a fighting stance. Jack chuckled "thought not."

What happen next occurred so quickly that Gwen hardly had time to register it. The man Jack referred to as Hans seem to instantaneously dissolve into a cloud of mist which traveled and the speed of a gale force wind up the stairs. Suddenly, the man's legs rematerialized and a knee was slammed into Jack's stomach with a force which surpassed even the strength of a weevil. The rest of Hans's body rematerialized seconds after, and with lighting speed he grabbed a handful of Jack's hair, bashed his head onto the steel handrail, and tossed the immortal ex-time agent over the side of the stairs like a rag doll!

Seeing her boss in such dire straits Gwen wasted no time in acting. With a scream of rage Gwen squeezed of round after round into Hans' head, stomach, and chest until her firearm clicked loudly, signaling her that he clip was empty. When the smoke cleared Hans was lying at the bottom of the stairs near his discarded gear, in a pool of dark blood. The danger was over, or so she thought. Gwen sighed with relief and looked over the railing; Jack was laying about ten feet down on the staircase a floor bellow, breathing heavily. Whether he had died and returned to life yet again or had temporarily lost consciousness she wasn't sure, but she was glad he was alright.

Jack wasn't in such an optimistic mood. "Goddamned Nazis, always showing up when it's least convenient for everybody." he grumbled as he got to his feet "It's the Bulge all over again ".

"Got 'im Jack", Gwen called from the stairwell above, "I put a clip in him, he's not going anywhere!" Jack shook his head.

"No you didn't! Now listen to me and run!"

Gwen was about to protest her boss' point when out of the corner of her eye she noticed Hans stir and quickly get to his feet, completely healed! Deciding that caution was the better part of valor, Gwen turn and ran as fast as her body would allow. When she reached the control room once again Gwen sprinted across the room nearly bowling over several of the evacuating U.N.I.T. personnel. She grabbed Lt. Davis by the collar of his uniform and pushed the surprised officer roughly against the closet wall.

"Where the hell did ya find that guy?" Gwen spoke accusingly through gritted teeth.

"I…well...," and with that Davis told her everything

35 years ago:

London was in flames. Just a day before the remnants of an insane Austrian's half-century old dream appeared in a fleet of overly large blimps, and in minutes all of England went to hell in a hand basket. The military, RAF, and even the forces of Hellsing and Iscariot were ravaged by the onslaught of the Third Reich's last hurrah. There had been panicked reports of vampires, a werewolf, and even a bizarre science experiment stalking around London killing everyone they could get their hands on.

The Brigadier and the rest of U.N.I.T.'s high command put little stock in the legends of the creatures which lurked in the darkness behind humanity. They were far too scientific minded for children's fairytales and as far as they were concerned *Sir* Integera Fairbrook Wingates Hellsing was some crazy bitch who still lived in the dark ages. But better safe than sorry they had armed a small elite squad with the customary silver bullets before dropping them into London.

As far as the squad was concerned, being dropped into London, even a day after the battle was akin to being dropped into a hell-mouth. The ancient city was nothing more than a smoking ruin. The smell of death and decay hung in the air, and several buildings were on fire, while others were still adorned with swastikas painted in human blood. As for the squad themselves, they had been dropped in just behind the Hellsing lines, with one objective: find anything which could be of use to defending Queen and Country from the extra terrestrial threats.

It took several hours to scour the city block by block. And despite what the news reports had said about massive rioting and looting, they didn't encounter a soul, it was as if something had swept through the city and cleaned it out, leaving nothing in their wake but silence. The squad leader, a man by the name of Haddrick Myers, a veteran of over twenty combat and recovery operations was about to report his mission as a dud when he saw it. Sitting in a pile of demolished houses was the largest blimp he had ever seen, Millennium's forward command, the Deus Ex Machina.

Giving the signal to advance, the squad moved quickly yet artfully toward the entrance to the wreckage. The inside of the blimp was just as mangled and ruined as its exterior, wires hung loosely from exposed and damaged light fixtures, the walls were pockmarked with bullet holes, and there was even a large hole on one of the floors of the main hallway, as if something had smashed its way down to the floors below

"Alright ladies and gents, looks like something went down there." Myers began, "So get yer repelling gear we're going down!" With a series of crisp salutes the U.N.I.T. soldiers prepared themselves and descended into the darkness of the lower levels. It took all of two seconds after they reached the bottom of the man-made hole for the solders to ready their weapons and activate the lights attached to them.

What they saw made most wish they hadn't. They had entered what, from the looks of the melted gold and scorched jewels, had once been a treasure hold. "Loose formation! Fifteen meter parameter! I want as much of this room searched as possible!" the leader barked, moving forward towards a huge scorched Nazi flag as the rest of his team spread out and around the obscenely large treasure hold.

One soldier, a new recruit by the name of William, soon found himself in a dark corner of the room uneasy and alone. Breathing heavily, the young solder began to hear sounds, like that of a solder quickly darting around off to his side. Turning quickly, the man saw nothing, he was about to breath a sigh of relief when he heard the same sound coming his other side and then from above. Thoroughly spooked the solder slowly looked up and saw nothing but the gleam of shark-like white teeth!

The rest of the team nearly jumped out of their skin when they heard the scream of their youngest member, and ran to his position. By the time they arrived William was dead, with a dark figure crouched over him. The leader of the squad readied his weapon followed by the rest of the team before addressing the figure. "Oi, hey cunt!" he began, "you've got three seconds to get off of him before we blow your ass away!"

The figure rose slowly, the gleam of white teeth under two red orbs and a ruined SS Grenadier's uniform were the only things visible in the dim light. With only a seconds pause the figure lunged, and before anyone could react, two of the U.N.I.T. solders had lost their heads in a shower of blood.

The remaining U.N.I.T. personnel lost their nerve and fired wildly at the creature quickly reducing it to ashes. Breathing heavily, the squad leader assessed the situation before shooting the three corpses to prevent them from rising as ghouls, and without a moment to stop and mourn their fallen comrades the remaining soldiers found their way to a large pile of overturned crates on top of what appeared to be a badly burned corpse.

"And so the Brigadier ordered him to be brought back here after he was recovered. And here we are!"Davis concluded is story in a matter-of-fact tone

Gwen simply sighed in response, it was just like U.N.I.T. to recover a subject without realizing what they had gotten themselves into. And now they were paying the price. Without another word, Gwen let go of the Davis ad headed to the car, uttering a soft prayer for Jack's safety.

Meanwhile, Jack was taking the fight to his stoic opponent. He rushed up the stairs and grabbing onto one of the handrails used his momentum to dropkick his opponent in the chest, causing the large German to stumble backward. Jack smiled, either Hans was losing his touch or he was still weak from his imprisonment, as Gwen's bullets shouldn't have pierced his flesh and his kick should not have affected him as much. But not one to question his luck as far as fighting was concerned Jack rained blow after blow down upon his massive opponent in every conceivable manner.

Hans was battered but not out of the fight. He was simply biding his time like the well trained soldier he was, waiting for the opportune moment to strike. That moment came when Jack tried to roundhouse kick him in the stomach. With lighting speed Hans caught the leader of Torchwood's leg and brought his free fist down upon his kneecap, causing the limb to snap like a twig. Jack's scream of agony was cut short by a swift kick to the chest, which sent him flying back down the stairs from whence he came.

To the layman Jack would appear to be dead, but Hans knew the time traveling ex-con too well. Soon he would be back up, revitalized, and practically begging for another beating. Never one to back down from a fight, especially when there was flesh to be had, Hans slowly stalked down the stairs toward the prone form of Captain Harkness. As soon as he regained life Jack sat up quickly and fired a round toward Hans's leg. With lighting speed the werewolf solder leapt off of the stair and land only inches away from Jack's head. With that Hans reached down lifted Jack up by the neck. and stared blankly into his eyes. Though his eyes conveyed hatred an defiance, Hans could only smell fear, the musky sweet sent which made his pray taste all the sweeter.

Without a second's more hesitation Hans dug his powerful jaws into the mat of Jack's shoulder. Even in his human form, Hans had enough strength to take away, the clothing flesh and muscle away from the time traveler's limb, and swallowed the bloody raw meat with the speed only a starving animal could match. Jack's wail of agony quickly was replaced by a snarl of rage as he used the enormous Nazi's gluttonous pause to swallow as an opening to plant his foot swiftly into the Germans loins.

The werewolf's eyes bulged as he tensed and let the un-chewed meat fall from his mouth. Before he realized what happened Jack connected with a right hook to the jaw, then another and another until he was relinquished from his opponents grip. Using his momentum in the fight, Jack leveled his revolver one last time and fired his remaining four shots into the still weakened lycanthrope's head.

POP!

POP!

POP!

POP!

It took a moment for the SS Captain to relive what had just occurred, but once he had been clued in by the blood pouring down his face like dark raindrops, his icy blank eyes rolled back into his head and he collapsed onto the stairs with an un-glorified thunk. As soon as Hans had been incapacitated again, Jack quickly unfastened his own belt and wrapped it tightly around his shoulder to stop the blood flow to the wound, which had begun to bleed profusely. Binding secure Jack dragged himself over to a wall and leaned against it. Breathing heavily, the ex-con activated his earpiece. "Mr. Davis, I hope you have some good news! I can't keep this up all day!"

"We're all clear in three minutes Captain Harkness" came the strained voice across the electronic device. As for Jack, he breathed a sigh of relief. Hopefully his gigantic opponent would be incapacitated for awhile longer. Only two short minutes later, however, the German drew in a gigantic breath and sat up. Getting to his feat, the Aryan behemoth stared down at Jack his thousand yard stare chilling the injured man. It was 1945 all over again. As Jack closed his eyes and prepared to be devoured, he heard the German begin to lumber away.

"Shit", the American screamed in his mind, he needed to distract Hans just a few moments longer, until the way was clear. And so he made a gamble. "I know where your kitten is big guy." He purred, smirking, if that didn't work nothing would. And he was right; Hans stopped right in the middle of gathering his weapons and stared at his fallen opponent

The Hellsing limo moved quickly, though not over the speed limit mind you, through the streets of London. Integra and Seras were sitting on either side of the back seat, with Schrödinger in the middle of the two ladies. And he couldn't be happier for the moment, for he had the one thing that he loved only slightly less than his Captain and war, a can of tuna. He was presently devouring his precious fishy treat with about as much class and refinement as a school of hungry sharks, using a fork he had found only God knows where. And while Integra had had enough time after noticing the brightly colored can to role down a window there was still an overpowering stench of canned fish which Integra could tell would take weeks to get out of the car. For awhile, the only sounds herd it the limousine was the smacking and slurping sounds as the young catboy as loudly chewed his food and sucked down the juice which gathered at the bottom of the can.

After a few more moments, the boy spoke, mouth still half filled with fish, "So…vhat…I haf to listen to a bunch of alte (2) Limies talking about England zhis und England zhat und be bored out of mein mind?"Before Integra could even respond to the outlandish racist comment, Seras had slapped the boy across the head, causing him to drop the now empty can of tuna and clutch the back of his head, his face contorted in a silent scream for a moment.

"Oww! Vhat zee hell vas zhat for?"

"You know you little prick!" Seras grumbled as her boss tried to suppress a smile. Succeeding, but just barely, Integra cleared her throat gathering her thoughts before addressing the catboy.

"You will not be attending sevent, I haven't had the time to add you to our roster of personnel yet. Instead you will be given leave to explore London and England at your leisure on…"

"Oh zank you, zank you, zank you! The boy happily chirped, cutting Integra off as he bounced happily in his seat.

"In thee conditions," the Hellsing leader continued holding up a hand to calm the scientific quandary, "first, you will not commit any murders while in this country."

Schrödinger stopped bouncing and listened. No murder? He could live with that.

"Second, no stealing anything."

Schrodinger's ears flattened "Vhat else can I do? he though before realizing something, Oh! Oh! I can alvays—

"Finally, absolutely, under no circumstances are you to prostitute yourself for pocket money. You will be given two-hundred pounds and that is all am I understood?" Integra barked snapping the catboy away from his thoughts. Saras, assuming that the last rule was a joke, began to laugh, until Schrödinger hissed indignantly.

"Oh come on vhy?" the boy whined, arms crossed and looking huffy, "no vone ever lets me have any fun! Du, Major, Doc, everyone is alvays so vell behaved und boring!"

Integra pinched the bridge of her nose and sighed. She was being uncharacteristically nice, and she received only spite in return. "Well you can either take my offer or you can go back to the manor young man!" she spoke coolly before grabbing the boy by an ear and pulling him closer, "I can still throw you screaming back into Alucard butler, so think carefully before addressing me!"

Schrödinger hissed as his overly sensitive ears were tugged and let out a whine of protest before Integra relinquished her grip."Fine," he began in the snotty tone which came so naturally to him, "give me ze money und I'll see vhat I can do vith it zhat von't get me in trouble!" Integra presented her new butler with a two-hundred pound note, which he quickly took before pulling on his ski-cap and donning his sunglasses and disappearing into the either of existence.

Seras breathed a sigh of relief as the car continued word it's destination, glad to be rid of the boy and his canned fish for the time being. But as the car passed into the gates of the royal palace, something clicked on inside Seras' mind, "Wait a second," she said staring at Integra in disbelief, "did he just admit to being a bloody whore?"

Jack still couldn't believe that his gamble had played off so well Not only had he distracted Hans long enough to allow U.N.I.T. time to evacuate their base, but he had gotten free medical treatment from the insanely tall German in exchange for information on the location of his mentally unstable catboy companion. Sure the werewolf was no medic but he at least knew how to stanch blood flow until proper medical treatment could be procured. And so here he was in the middle of London with no ride and no companions.

The only consolation that the ex-time agent had was that he had was that he had directed Hans toward Cardiff. Schrödinger, being the wandering, hyperactive creature he was, was more than likely long gone. However, it would provide the Torchwood team a way to observe him until they figured out a way to contain or kill him. For now, Jack had a meeting to attend.

The elegant room in Buckingham Palace which had been used for the meetings of the Round Table was covered in a thick layer of dust when it had been opened not even two hours ago, It had not been used since the horrible days thirty-five years ago, not only because there had not been any attacks on England which had warranted its use, but also due to a small fear held amongst the Royal family that by opening those doors would somehow call up the ghosts of the insane pudgy Major and his menagerie of freakish followers.

When all had been introduced the list of attendees included the Queen and King, the Minister of communication, the Prime Minister, the Minister of Defense, and the son of the late Sir Penwood. Also in attendance were Sir Hellsing and her servant Seras Victoria, the Brigadier of U.N.I.T. and the detachment from Torchwood. Integra immediately noticed that Captain Harkness was not with the rest of his team, and for that she uttered a silent prayer of thanks. As good of a soldier as Jack seemed to be, he was also a notorious flirt with whom Integra had little patience.

"So you see," began one Gwen Cooper motioning to a display on a laptop, "the release of the tape coincides with a significant increase in Rift activity." Integra raised a brow as the Brigadier spoke up,

"So what does this mean, are the Daleks and Cybermen returning, or is someone simply mocking us?" Gwen shrugged, as her compatriot Lois Habiba spoke up,

"We…don't know…but we do have a lead," she began looking more than slightly nervous as she held a picture up to the assembled ministers and important personnel, "this, is George Winslow Marin III, head of the Marin Electronics company and well know sci-fi enthusiast." Integra took the momentary pause to take stock of the man's features,. He was pail skinned with red hair and a face completely covered in freckles and bright hazel eyes. Integra couldn't help but notice, however, how much the man reminded her of the insane kraut Major she had met all those years ago. "If anyone knows who released the video it would be him, he's into researching supposed conspiracies between the government and alien races" the graying woman concluded with no hidden amount of malice as she glanced at a few of the ministers who shifted uncomfortably.

"Let's back up a moment," Integra said, breaking the uncomfortable silence, "why in God's name was I not informed of the existence of the Daleks and Cybermen until today?"

"With all due respect Sir Integra," Johnson spoke, finally breaking her silence, "we've been trained to deal with these creatures, and there is no need to inform those who are not trained to deal with these threats and…"

"Threats?" Integra barked, cutting the other woman off, "these creatures will only kill you, Vampires…"

"Don't feed us your Vampire's are the biggest threat bullshit Lady!" the Brigadier nearly screamed as Integra responded with an icy glare. Finally, the Queen had enough and silenced the discussion with a slam of her fist upon the table.

"That is quite enough out of all of you," she started with a sigh, "do any have a plan to track down the origin of this tape or not?

"Yes of course my Queen," Gwen began before the entire conference was interrupted by the sound of the door swinging open and a familiar, chipper, American voice calling out.

"Honey! I'm Home!"

Schrödinger stared with longing into the large display window of a pet shop somewhere in London. He had come to the conclusion that if he was to be a slave to the Hellsing organization for the rest of eternity, he would purchase and consume as much catnip as he could find, in the hope that being on a constant high would make eternity all the more bearable. And so, firmly convinced that this was the only course of events, the former Hitler Youth gripped the handle of the door just before he was grabbed around the waist by a pair of miniscule arms.

"Kitty!" a young feminine voice cried out enthusiastically from behind him. The Aryan youth hissed at the unwanted contact and peered into the reflective surface of a nearby window which revealed the image of a doe-eyed brunet girl of about five years of age. Schrödinger froze in fright having realized what the girl had said after seeing her reflection in the window of the store. How did she know he was part cat? Did he smell different to her? Did she see the outline of his ears under his cap? He didn't know for certain, but he did realize that something had to be done before someone got suspicious.

Should I kill her? he thought but quickly pushed the though out of his mind, that would get the police involved, which would earn him a one way trip back to Alucard, which he desperately wanted to avoid. Thinking harder, he considered teleporting. That way, the girl wouldn't be harmed and if anyone saw him they would be labeled as crackpots and their claims ignored, at least that is what he told himself.

At the last moment, however, he was saved by another voice, also female, but much older. "Melissa d-d-dear," it began "get away from that p-poor boy, we don't have time for this n-nonsense again, we're running late!" Suddenly a force pulled back on the girl, dragging the hellish experiment with her, until he grip broke and he was planted ass first on the sidewalk. A long stream of German curses followed, as Schrödinger slowly stood to face his attacker and savior while unceremoniously rubbing his now sore rump.

Behind him the clearly upset child, who was most displeased at being pulled off "kitty boy" as she had nicknamed Schrödinger already, was a woman who was the spitting image of her daughter, although much older, and a man with hair the color of wheat, grey eyes, and a neatly trimmed goatee, who was the first to speak. "Oi! Sorry about that my boy, she's a fighter when she sees something she likes!" he said with a chuckle, Schrödinger sniffed indignantly pretending to dust himself off.

"Um…zhat is…fine," he began, "I'm just startled, zhat is all.", looking up at the assembled family with the sincerest fake smile he could muster.

"Great," the man said, flashing a rather goofy thumbs up in the butler clad youth's direction, "we won't keep you any longer then." Taking both his wife's and daughter's hands the family began to walk away, the mother, scolding the child gently.

"Melissa n-no more of this g-g-got it, that's the s-second tt-ime today!" Schro's ears twitched underneath the ski-cap, Second time? he thought as he called out, "Excuse me, sorry, but zhis is zhe second time zhis happened?"

"Oh um, y-yes." the woman stuttered. "T-t-the f-first t-t-time she said something about a w-wolf and hugged a m-man in a t-t-trench coat a few b-b-blocks-" she never got to finish the sentence, for as soon as she had said "trench coat" the boy was off, sprinting as if the Devil was on his heels in the direction that they had come from. If the woman didn't know better, she could have sworn the boy had read her mind and knew which way to go.

"Captian Harkness. There better be a good explanation for all of this!" The Queen was pissed to put it lightly, as Jack was being tended to by Martha and was applying some powdered silver to the wound.

"I apologize my queen I had a bit of a run-in with an old friend of mine and we got into a bit of a altercation as you can see." Jack winced as the final suture was put into place. Integra raised a brow at the application of powdered silver but decided against bringing it up for fear of causing panic.

"Well then," the King began, "Torchwood will be dispatched to contact this George Winslow Marin III and see what he knows about this tape. Hellsing will remain on alert and provide assistance if necessary."

"And as for the rest of you," his wife continued, "suppress all broadcasts of the tape anywhere and take it off the internet post haste. You are all dismissed!" With that Roundtable broke up headed out to their appointed tasks.

"Seras, I want you to keep an eye on Captain Harkness, whatever attacked him, it wasn't natural. Make sure he doesn't change" Those were the first words spoken after the Hellsing members retreated to the comfort of their limousine. Seras responded with a slow, respectful nod as several minutes were passed in silence as Integra considered the next course of action. She hated being kept in reserve, most of all being kept in reserve to assist Torchwood and their flirtatious captain. She was a Hellsing after all, and as far as Integra was concerned, that meant she should be on the front line of every conflict, her father never took a back seat to anyone, and so neither would she.

Feeling that there was no more to be said, Seras fazed through the car and set about her assigned task as Schrödinger appeared next to Integra with a sigh. . His search for the "wolf" that the family had spoken of had proved fruitless. If there was a werewolf in London it was probably not the Captain as far as the boy was concerned, and therefore not worth his time. And so Schrödinger lived up to his promise to himself and had bought and a large amount of catnip. which he stashed in his back pockets for a later time.

The next few minutes of the trip was rather un-eventful and consisted of Integra explaining to her new butler exactly how to prepare her evening tea when she returned home, and would have remained on the subject had the Hellsing driver not slammed on the break, sending Schrödinger across the back of the limousine.

"What the hell was that!" Integra screamed causing the driver to drop the window separating him from his boss a bit so that he could speak.

"Dreadfully sorry Sir," he began nervously, "some big bloke just walked into the road!"

A few Minutes Earlier:

The Captain, Hans Guensche. was once the most feared and respected soldier in the Waffen SS, and so he felt it a little ironic that he had fallen this far. His first meal after escaping from the U.N.I.T. prison had come from the dumpster behind a fast food restaurant. For someone who for 180 years had either hunted in the woods of Europe for fresh game, or had his food prepared by the best chefs that Germany had to offer, dumpster diving for food made him feel lower than a mongrel werewolf pup.

Crouched in a back alley and enjoying, or rather simply subsisting on a half eaten basket of fried fish he had again found in a dumpster Hans assessed the situation as he saw it. He was out of money, in the middle of London and without any transportation. Schrödinger was supposedly in Cardiff, which, if he remembered the maps that the Major showed him all those years ago, was at least a three day walk to the northwest and while he could shift into his wolf form to cut the travel time in half, it was still light enough for people to still see him. And so with a sigh, Hans arose from the crouching position he had taken, dusted himself off, and stepped into a road, where he was immediately greeted by the screeching tires of a vehicle coming to a hard stop.

Turning sharply, the Captain can confronted with the image of an extremely pissed off chauffer. Hans would have shrugged the incident off and continued on his not so marry way had he not encountered two scents wafting from the limo with about as much subtlety to the elder werewolf as the perfume of a French whore. The first he recognized, as that of Integra Hellsing, although she had lost her youth by the Captain's estimate, but the second scent was comforting, safe, feline, and could only belong to one person.

Schrödinger? the Captain thought, as schooled as he had been when Seras had almost ended his life, Warum zum Teufel ist er mit Sie? (3) Wasting no further time Hans looked around to see if there was anyone else was on the street. Seeing none Hans moved quickly, using the front of the car as a spring board to quickly leap onto the roof of the limo.

Within the car both occupants jumped when the Captain's boots connected with the roof of Integra's limo. However, unlike Schrödinger who fell to the floor of the vehicle, Integra, her skills honed by over forty years of vampire hunting, drew her saber and struck upward piercing the roof of her car. Hans was ready for this however, and gave the offending blade a swift and powerful kick, bending the blade sideways and leaving it unable to be withdrawn. He then quickly began rolling the roof back like the limo was an oversized and high-priced sardine can.

"You!" Integra barked upon seeing the hollow visage of the Captain, who was poignantly ignoring her and staring directly at the prone form of Schrödinger, who returned the gaze with a mixture of surprise, amazement and fear.

"Nein!" Schrödinger gasped in disbelief, "Du bist tot!" (4). Slowly standing the Aryan boy reached up, offering his lover his hand which was grasped tightly as the Captain pulled him to his feet and out of the destroyed car roof. Not wanting to waste the opportunity Integra drew her pistol, a shiny silver affair of a high caliber, and fired, striking the elder werewolf in the shoulder. Reacting on impulse, Schrodinger quickly grabbed Hans around the waist and teleported them both to safety.

Integra blinked, now alone with only there driver in her limo turned convertible, confused by everything that just happened. Her new butler had just rescued an enemy he should have helped her kill, and someone who should ha3ve been dead just destroyed he favorite limo and sword. Something strange was going on, and seemed to only be getting worse, that much was certain, and as soon as Alucard returned from his mission, Integra would have him solve all of this with brutal tenacity.

Schrödinger and Hans appeared in an alleyway about half a mile from the limousine, and Hans was greeted with a punch to the gut. It didn't hurt, but it was surprising. Looking down, the Captain was confronted with the shocked face of much younger looking ex-Warrant Officer, his pink eyes shining with tears behind a lowered pair of sunglasses.

"Schwienhund! Du Verdamtest Schweinhund! (5) You are supposed to be dead! Vhere have you been!"

In prison the Captain thought knowing that the boy would receive the message.

"Prison? Vhy didn't you break out before now!"Schrodinger nearly screeched, waking up a pair of winos who proceeded to ask for change. "I don't have any change!" Schrodinger screamed as he pointed to Hans, "Und if you don't leave I'll have him eat you both!"As the two drunks took off running, Schrodinger looked up into the eyes of the Captain awaiting his answer.

I was put into a coma

"A coma! Likely story! I think it was because you don't liebst mich (6) anymore! I think du…." Schrodinger never got to complete the sentence as Hans lead down and planted a passionate kiss on his young lover's lips, tasting him for the first time in over three decades. The stayed like that for awhile, nether knowing whether hours or minutes had passed, caring only for the taste and feel of each others lips.

Finally, Schrodinger broke the kiss and stammered the magical phrase that Hans had longed to hear since the war, "M-Miein Kapitan…I need you…now!" Hans didn't need to be told twice, lifting the boy into his arms bridal style; he took off down the alleyway

The journey took fifteen minutes and an awkward elevator ride in which a handful of residents of an apartment complex stared awkwardly at the insanely large man carrying a giggling child in his arms like they were freshly married. Within minutes they were inside the apartment that the Captain had "acquired" and Schrödinger was placed on the bed carefully. Stepping off his greatcoat and hat, the Captain bent down and nuzzled his lovers neck before nibbling gently on one of his ears through his cap, coaxing a soft moan from the catboy. Taking that as a signal to continue the large werewolf nearly ripped off Schrödinger's dress coat and shirt and began planting a trail of kisses down his lean chest and stomach. "Kapitan! Wait!" Hans froze, though the heat was rising in his loins and her coulf feel his length straining against his pants, he wanted this to be as perfect as possible As he looked up Schrödinger slowly removed his ski-cap and sunglasses, revealing his mesmerizing rose colored cat eyes, unruly blonde mane, and tender back furred ears.

The boy shot his superior a sly smirk before disappearing and repapering directly behind him and letting out a playful whistle. "Behind you mien Kapitan! Try to keep up Schatz (7) I can't do zhis all by mein self!" Hans smirked in return, the little bastard still had his playful side intact, that much was certain, but there was one thing that could stop him dead in his tracks and get him to stop teasing. Quicker than the youth could blink Hans had his arms pinned at his sides and began gently nibbling upon one of his ears causing the boy to make a sound somewhere between a yowl of irritation and a giggle.

"No fair! Thought ve agreed my ears vere off limits!" the kitten protested but to no avail, before he knew it he was laid bare on the bed. Hans stood strait at the foot of the bed and finished undressing himself. Unlike The werewolf who kept a cleanly trimmed patch of hair just above his impressive fourteen inch cock, Schrödinger was completely devoid of body hair and was only about average size in length. Desipite everything to Hans the catboy was the closest thing to a Cherub he could ever hope to see, that is if cherubs were about as mentally stable as Charlie Manson and looked as if they came from bizzaro world.

"Kapitan! I'm getting boooooorrrrrreeeeedddd! Are we going to play or are you just going to stare at mich all day hmm?" The Captain snapped out of his pleasant train of thought and with a smile that could only be matched by a shark, he took his place above his beloved kitten and set upon his neck, kissing biting and suckling his way downward to one of the catboy's shoulders. The chorus of moans, hisses and gasps which emanated from the cat-eared youth combined with the all too familiar pressure which began to prod the werewolf's stomach let him know that his lover was beginning to enjoy himself.

The Captain smiled and began biting softly on one of the Catboy's nipples, as he moved his hand downward to slowly stroke his lover's length, causing Schrödinger to squirm, moan and dig his nails into the larger man's back, to which the werewolf gave only the tiniest of flinches. "Kapitan," the former Hitler youth moaned loudly, "I'm ready…p-please just…" a finger placed gently against his lips told Schrodinger he was understood the captain pressed the youth up against the headboard of the bed and rubbed his length already slick and dripping between the tight mounds of his lover's rear before pushing into him gently. Hans grunted, the boy was still as tight as the day they first made love almost a century ago thanks to his accelerated healing and ability to ritualize his form with every teleportation, a fact that the Captain had anonymously that Dok for thousands of times over.

An increase in pressure brought the Captain back to reality. Schrodinger leaned back, his body relaxing to accommodate more of the invading organ as he rapidly worked himself toward the ecstasy he craved. Within the minute both lovers reached the brink as Schrodinger's heated gasps were accompanied by a hellish sound best described as somewhere between a human scream and a wolf's howl.

Minutes passed as both the catboy and werewolf recovered from there carnal high. Pulling out of his lover slowly the Captain moved Schrodinger on top of him and nuzzled the boy's fragrant pheromone laced ears gently, running his fingers through the golden locks which separated them. As far as he was concerned, this was heaven. The Major and the Doktor were dead, meaning he had no more orders to follow, and he had Schrödinger to spend the rest of eternity with.

If only Dok and Major could see us now. Hans thought as he noticed Schrödinger's ears twitch before said catboy burst out laughing, "Zhey would kill you mein Kapitan, zhe Major for being a fag und Dok for 'ruining' his experiment!" The Captain winced as he realized the boy had read his mind again. He mentally kicked himself, after ninety years of being around the boy he should have remembered that no thoughts were ever private when Schrodinger was around.

The cat-eared youth gave his lover a quick kiss and rolled off of him shaking his rear playfully at his favorite superior. "Go take ein shower mein liebe und vhen you come back I'll be ready for round zwei ja?" Hans smiled, that sounded like a good plan to him, and so he left for the closest bathroom, cracking his knuckles as he steped into the other room. Schroedinger sighed as soon as he heard the bathroom door shut. He'd love nothing more than to waltz into the shower and further aid in his lover's "relaxation" but he had been gone for at least three hours and Integra would doubtlessly wonder how someone who was essentially omnipresent hadn't escaped yet.

And so Schrödinger slipped out of bed and started to get dressed when he heard the slightest whimper eminating from the closet near the bed. Ears twitching and clothing temporarily forgotten, Schrödinger got on all fours and stalked the way cats do toward the closet and began sniffing under the door, catching the scent of humans. Perking a brow in confusion Schrödinger stood and opened the door only to be confronted with a family of three, the same family he had met on the street earlier that day and somehow they were still alive.

"Of all the apartments he could have picked, it had to be yours" the boy said with a sigh but only received shocked looks form the parents."

"O-o-oh m-m-my G-God, Melissa w-was r-r-right! Y-y-you're a.."

"Kitty!" Melissa interrupted, enthused that she had proved her parents wrong. Her father was not as delighted.

"Good lord kid where are your clothes?" he cried causing the youth to look down at himself for a moment before smiling and closing the door.

Five minutes later Schrödinger was dressed and leaning against a wall in the bathroom watching Hans dress, but his lover's body was the last thing on his mind at the moment. "Sooo….why are there people in the closet?" he asked in German in case the family could still hear them from the other room. Had glanced at the boy from his peripheral vision

I'm going to eat…Why the hell are you in a Hellsing uniform! Was the Captain's thought reply, also in his native language.

"Because it was either this…or stay stuck in Alucard for the rest of eternity and I-I," The Captain frowned, tears were streaming down the boy's face which caused him the quickly pull him into a tight comforting embrace, "I don't want to go back don't be mad I just can't go back!" Hans frowned and kissed the boys forehead.

I'm not mad, he thought, you were scared and you thought I was dead it makes sense. Go do your job, I'll find a way to get you away from it I swear! Schrödinger knew Hans would try his damndest to live up to his promise he always did. The catboy fished around his pockets and produced the remainder of the money that Integra gave him earlier that day.

"Here, this is for you my love, go get some food and a new change of clothes we can't have you wandering around London in your old uniform and eating locals can we?" Hans nodded and took the money and with a loving smile the youth was gone, and he was left alone in the apartment with his hostages in the closet

Seconds later Schrödinger reappeared in the office of Integra Hellsing, and was promptly shot in the head. Reappearing a minute or so later Integra could clearly tell that the boy was pissed. "Vhat zhe fuck vas zhat for!" he screamed switching back to the broken English he used to communicate with his new employer.

Integra glared as she often did at those who surprised her, "never teleport into my office, you will teleport outside and use the door like everyone else is that understood?"

"Ja Herr Hellsing." The insane experiment grumbled under his breath. He has seen Alucard teleport and walk through the walls into her office, and he had no idea why he should be treated differently, but he complied nonetheless in order to avoid the possibility of being shot again.

"Second, where have you been? Why did it take you 3 hours to escape?" the Hellsing leader continued causing Schrodinger to blush and look down.

"He..he knocked me out so I couldn't teleport mein Herr..I-I just voke back up." The boy was lying, of that Integra was certain, but it didn't matter, as soon as Alucard returned from collecting familiars, he would be dispatched to take care of the werewolf, so if the catboy had been plotting something with him, it would be short lived, something she supposed Schrödinger knew as well. For now she could use the presence of the werewolf to get revenge on Torchwood, whom she held responsible for keeping Hellsing in reserve for their latest investigation.

"I need you to deliver this to someone Named Jack Harkness in Cardiff can you do it?" Integra inquired as she handed the catboy an envelope he gave her a snappy salute in return.

"Jawohl!" and with that her butler was gone. Integra Smiled to herself and lit a cigar. She was going to show torchwood why Integra Fairbrooke Wibgates Hellsing was not someone to fuck with!

Translations:

Untermenschen = Nazi term meaning "Sub-Human", anyone who isn't German or Aryan

Alte = Old

Warum zum Teufel ist er mit Sie? = Why the Devil/fuck is he with her?

Du bist tot! = You are dead!

Schwienhund! Du Verdamtest Schweinhund! = Bastard! You damn bastard!

liebst mich = love me

Schatz = Honey/sweety/dear

Obligatory Author stuff: Sorry this took so long guys, School and health issues prevented me from working on this for a long time. Join us next time when the final players enter the stage and the chaos begins. Special thinks to my first two reviewers Master of the Boot and Max000. Hope you guys continue to enjoy. Also thanks again to Master of the Boot for allowing me to use his idea about Schrödinger's…um…ahem…"inter-war" profession. If you haven't read any of his stuff do so. You won't be disappointed.