"Hey", Lexa starts. "I'm gonna be a bit late, babe"
"Everything ok?", Clarke asks on the other end of the phone.
"Yeah, you know, we caught one of the bad guys, now we still have some paperwork to deal with"
"Ah, I see"
"I am sorry"
"No, I understand", Clarke replies while putting away her scrubs in the dirty pile at the hospital. The break room suddenly feels small. She's getting frustrated. "Call me when you're done?"
"Absolutely. Bye"
Clarke hangs up.
"How are things with Lexa?", Raven asks.
"Yeah, I mean, when we're together everything's great, you know? But it's the things that happen when we're apart that bother me. I completely understand that she's a Special Agent and she can't tell me everything that happens at work, but then we've been dating for a month and the other day she came home bruised again and of course she didn't want to go to the hospital, that rib could've been broken, but did she go see an actual doctor? No, of course not… and then, she disappears for hours and when she appears again it's only to say she'll be late. I don't wanna be that girlfriend, but I honestly don't know what she wants from me"
"Maybe she doesn't know either. Maybe you need to ask her"
"It started out as something so simple"
"Good things never come easy, you know that. Ask her, I mean, how many relationships has she been in?"
"One, a few years ago"
"Maybe she's scared"
"I'm going home"
"Talk to O, maybe she'll have better ideas"
"No, I understand what you're saying Rae, thanks"
"Anytime, blondie"
Clarke walks into her apartment half defeated, half tired of work. Octavia is in the couch watching Netflix.
"Clarke? I thought you were going to be with Lexa"
"So did I", she replies plopping in the couch next to Octavia. The brunette moves closer and holds Clarke.
"What happened? She seems nice, I mean, I've only seen her once but she looked like a good person, very fond of you, very much looking at you like you were the only one in the room which is always good to see when your roommate's dating someone"
"She's late. Which I understand. But…", Clarke's explanation is interrupted by a message. "It's Lexa, she's downstairs"
"Well, go see her. You know you wanna, give her a chance"
Clarke pretends not to be excited to see Lexa. She really likes the girl, but there's only so much mystery she can take.
"Hey, I'll be downstairs in a minute", Clarke tells Lexa.
"I will go hide in my room and put on a movie or something and it'll be as if I'm not even here", Octavia manages to announce before Clarke's rushing downstairs.
The doctor opens the door and sees Lexa standing outside coily and nervous, she has a bouquet of flowers on her hands.
"Good to see you, agent"
"Good night, doctor… I, I brought this for you", Lexa starts by handing the blonde the flowers. "I understand it's not much and that you're upset"
"That's a good start"
"I know I haven't been, well, it's not easy for me to date really. Could we maybe do this elsewhere?"
"Do you want to come upstairs? Octavia is hiding in her room"
"Yeah"
They move to Clarke's apartment in silence.
"You were saying", Clarke begins as she sits in one of the couches in the living room. Lexa sits next to her.
"Yes, I was saying… I am really sorry I've been acting so weird. I know it's been partly because of work, but I also know it's me. I suck at feelings"
"Try", the blonde tells the brunette.
"Well, I haven't been in an actual relationship in a while. I get bored or think that, you know, I kinda like the single life. You get to do what you want whenever, nobody's asking anything from you. I really don't respond well to people wanting things from me, except at work. I am really good at my job"
She pauses and looks at Clarke, who's still just staring at Lexa.
"But then I met you", Lexa blushes and rushes through these words.
Clarke's still waiting how this will play out, but so far she's not completely sure this is looking good for her. The flowers though.
"And then I couldn't help wanting to call you and seeing you again. I am kind of a mess, I work a lot and don't eat well, I exercise like crazy and have problems being social, but I want to try and give a shot at being a better person, you know, a person that you would date. It's just that I am so used now to being on my own, to do my thing. But I want to try Clarke at being there for you and being here, present, for you. And doing things and making plans"
"So… what do we do now?", the doctor asks uncertain.
"It'd like to know what do you think about this, I mean, I think I just basically said I am into you"
"Yeah", it is time for Clarke to blush now. "I wasn't expecting you to be so honest, after all the hiding"
"I am sorry about that"
"I know now, and thank you for explaining all of this to me. I guess I do things differently, I like being open to things and just taking the leap, you know? And I understand that you're trying and thank you so much for telling me because I know we both have lots of responsibilities on our hands. You have a new unit to lead and I have a job at a hospital, but I think we can make this work, because I really like you too."
"So now I get a kiss?", Lexa asks shyly.
"Yes... you do"