Hello! I write this entire by hand before typing it up and it was 16 pages long and took me about four days to write and probably about six or seven hours, but I think it's all worth it.

If you didn't already know this, which I doubt you did, the title of this story is based on the song 'Pretend It's Ok' by the incredibly talented British girl band Little Mix (which, if you have never heard Little Mix before, I suggest you look up their song "Wings" on YouTube) because when I was trying to think of a title, which I had a difficult time doing, Pretend It's OK started playing when I was listening to music and the lyric from it: "I see the light that I'm chasing, your memory but it's fading..." inspired me to name the story after the song because that one lyric captured the theme of the story really well.

So, to get to my point, I have decided that I'm going to be starting this thing where the title of the chapter is based on a certain song that I love. This chapter is Cannonball by Little Mix which is a really good song.

Each chapter will have a completely different song. You might have Little Mix or 1D or the Jonas Brothers or some High School Musical song. Whatever song, no matter if it is the entire song or just a small part of it, if I feel like it applies to the chapter at least somewhat, it's the song of the chapter.

I'll post a link to each song on my profile.

Enjoy!

Chapter Two: Cannonball

~It's not hard to fall, when you, know that you just don't know~

Cat tried her hardest to remember. She imagined attending classes, dances, assemblies, plays and anything else there might have been. The website had led her here, to this performing arts school in Hollywood.

"Hollywood Arts," she read the words off the sign above her head. Just looking at it, hanging high in the air, made her furious at both herself and her blank mind. She had driven to LA today morning, after spending the entire night on the website Sam had told her about, . It was a spur of the moment thing, coming to LA, something she had decided to do just hours before, when after she finally found the page of the Tori Vega girl after a while of looking, only for it to be set on private. After seeing that, after seeing that, she had grabbed her suitcase and started packing her and Nevaeh's things.

She had hoped that just seeing the school would bring her memories flooding back, that she would recall who she was, where she came from, what exactly happened to her that made all her memories go away, and who exactly was Nevaeh's father? Yet, as she stood I'm front of the school, nothing like that entered her mind.

Cat shifted the car seat Nevaeh was in to the opposite arm. She took a deep breath and walked up to the front doors of the school. The Hollywood Arts logo-a giant H and A right next to each other, the a being slightly below the H-was painted on the glass door. Just a few years before, she probably walked through these doors every day. She expected them to be locked, school doesn't start for another week (at least that is what the sign had said) but they swung right open. Cat only hesitated for a few seconds before stepping inside.

And almost instantly something flashed in her mind. Lockers, each one different, one a working keyboard, another one with stars that lit up.

And just as fast as it came, the memory stopped all together, leaving her with everything it had told her, even though it wasn't much.

It made Cat frustrated. She felt like she was so close to something and yet she was so, so far away.

All the lockers she saw, however, were painted the same, shiny gray color. None of them were keyboards or lit up. This made Cat even madder, receiving only a pointless memory.

She walked to a set of stairs and say down, setting the car seat next to her and unbuckled Nevaeh out of it. Nevaeh stared, as much as she could, at her surroundings, and, like her mom, taking in where she was.

Her phone began to buzz in her pocket and Cat wrapped one arm around Nevaeh to make sure she doesn't accidentally go anywhere and used her free hand to grab her cell.

-Just made it to Seattle. It's kinda great to be back

-That's good

Maybe she should have mentioned to Sam that she was in LA, but something told her that it wasn't important, and so she simply didn't.

-Call you when I can, but currently unpacking

-Take your time :)

Cat placed her phone in her pocket, not taking it out even after vibrating once again., She didn't want any distractions. She balanced Nevaeh on her hip and stood up, leaving the car seat on the stairs. She wasn't really worried about losing it, there wasn't really anyone around to take it.,

She started down the hall leading right on the platform the stairs read to. All the walls of the school were decorated with a variety of art, drawn most likely by current and past students. The lockers all around gee seemed out of place, like they too should be decorated as the ones in the flash memory were.

A plaque above the door of a classroom read Mr. Sikowitz. Cat laughed, trying to pronounce the funny name out loud.

"It's Sikowitz, like 'he's psycho' not 'sicko.'" there was a pause, "What are you doing here?"

Cat jumped, the sudden voice coming as surprise. She turned around, slightly tightening her grip on Nevaeh. "Sorry, the doors were unlocked and I'm just-we're just-looking around."

Nevaeh gave off a loud cooing noise that echoed throughout the hallway. The guy who had spoken eyes, which had widened when Cat turned around, dropped to the infant in her hands. His facial expression changed into a shocked one, like he hadn't noticed the baby earlier. Cat studied the guy in front of her while his eyes were locked on the baby, like he was trying to figure something out too. The guy had current Brown hair and Brien eyes and was kind of skinny. Something about him seemed so familiar, but mostly he was another stranger.

"Cat," he said, after what seemed like an eternity of an awkward silence. Car was surprised he knew her name, he just have known her before she left this town. "What happened to your hair?"

She became instantly confused, releasing one of the hands that was cradling Nevaeh and using it to touch the top of her head, where she had conned her hair into a pony tail that morning. "What do you mean?"

"It's brown, your hate your hair Brown."

"It's always been Brown." Cat glared down at Nevaeh's Tiny head, her hair was identical in color to Cat's. Even though she couldn't remember much, she knew that with her skin tone the shade it was, she wouldn't be able to pull off anything other than her natural color.

The guy stared for another second, and then took a deep breath before replying, "Why did you leave?"

"I don't know."

"Why are you acting, you know, normal?"

"Am I not supposed to?"

He shook his head. Cat wasn't sure what that meant exactly, had she not been Normal in the past?

The guy sighed, "What is my name?"

"I'm sorry, but I don't know."

"No. I'm sorry, but I have-"

He cut her off, "Stop apologizing, it's not your fault. Do you have amnesia?"

Cat nodded her head.

"What happened?" he asked, "Do you know?"

"No. I'm sor-" she stopped herself from saying it once again. "I woke up in the hospital a few months ago from a coma. She was born someone during that. C-Section."

"Can I see her?" He took a step forward, holding put his hands. Cat was hesitant, obviously she knew this boy in the past, but right now she had no clue who he was, but Nevaeh held out her hands and she decided to pass her to the guy.

"What's her name?"

"Nevaeh. Nevaeh Louise Valentine."

"Who's the father?"

"I don't know." Every question the gut asked felt like it had the same three word answer. But even back in San Diego it was the same thing. Almost a month before she had gone with Sam to the grocery store and they ran into someone that apparently Cat used to work with. She had asked how Cat was doing, what exactly happened to her, and other similar questions. Cat could only reply I don't know to all of them, because any other answer would have been a lite. She didn't know anything, and the little she did know she often doubted. The grocery store situation had been awkward, but at least Sam had been there to help. Standing in the halls in a school she most likely attended, standing in front of a stranger she might have one known very well or not at all, and being only with a three month old baby may be the most awkward thing that had ever happened to her (but, of course, she couldn't know for sure.)

"Does this school ever think about decorating the lockers?" she asked him, thinking back on the images that had flashed through her mind earlier. "They're just so boring compared to the rest of the school."

"The school does, they just have to un-decorate them for summer vacation and the freshman."

Cat almost yelped in excitement. That's the first thing she's remembered since waking up in the hospital months ago. Nevaeh, who was still being held by the guy, made a sound instead, loud and happy, like she knew something big had just happened.

"Was one a keyboard?" she asked, trying to verify the memory.

"The man nodded, "Yeah, Andre's was."

She tried to picture what Andre could have looked like and if she had known him well. She was thankful for his locker and that she could remember it, but it wasn't important. IT wasn't like remembering a locker that could make music would help her figure out everything she had wondered about. It did kind of tell her she had a past, but Nevaeh was evidence of that.

"Can you tell me about Andre?"

"Do you remember him?"

She shook her head, "No, just his locker. It's actually the first thing I've remembered since the hospital almost four months ago."

"Andre is really cool. He loves the piano and singing, and he's amazing at both of those things, but what he is the best at is songwriting. He's already written some songs for celebs. He tweeted the other day that he was writing for Ed Sheeran, who has always been one of his idols.

"He sounds cool, I wish I knew him."

The guy looked at Cat for a longer than needed time. She tried to ignore his stare by focusing on Nevaeh trying to pull on the curls in his hair. Only recently has Nevaeh started becoming so curious, messing with anything she could get her hands on. Cat held out her hands towards her daughter and she came right back to her.

Finally, the guy spoke, "You really don't remember much, don't you?"

She sighed, "I don't remember anything really."

"How did you know about Hollywood Arts?"

"I didn't. My roommate did. She crashed one of the parties a student threw Anne remembered seeing me there and she also remembered the school website . That led me here."

"So all you remember is a locker?" he asked and cat nodded, "You don't even remember the gang?

Cat gasped, "I was in a gang?"

He laughed, "No, our group of friends. Everyone referred to us as the gang. There were six of us: Andre, Tori, Beck, Jade, you, and me, Robbie."

Robbie. Finally Cat had his name. She was growing impatient waiting for it, ever since he had asked her what his real name was.

"Is your name short for anything?" she asked. Robbie's face lit up, like she had recalled something important, but she actually hadn't, she was just seeing if his name was a nickname, like how Cat was for Caterina.

"Yes, it's short for Robert."

Cat giggled when he said that. Even though that was the name she was expecting, she couldn't help but laugh, "Has anyone ever told you that your name is kinda gross?"

"Yes! You have!" he seemed excited, but Cat knew it was practically nothing. She felt guilty for this, even though it wasn't her fault. "We were filming a bad news song for the Slap and you learned my name was actually Robert and you said it was gross."

She looked down at the floor, "I'm sorry I don't remember that."

He just nodded his head. It was moments like these when Cat really hatred her amnesia. When someone-Robbie, Sam, her doctor, anyone-thought she had part of her life back, but it was just a false alarm. It was the look of disappointment in their faces that killed her. If she could have her mind whole again, she would. They all knew that, but they wanted it sooner than it was coming. At last, that is how it felt to her.

"How did you choose Nevaeh's name?" Cat was glad Robbie spoke. It was a distraction from her thoughts.

"The nurse that was in charge of taking care of her while I was in a coma told me she was like an angel in heaven after I woke up. I couldn't really decide on a name for her and that nurse suggested Nevaeh, which is Heaven spelled backwards, and that just kinda stuck."

"It's a cute name. I think it fits her well."

Nevaeh shifted in Cat's arms and Feat changed the way she held the infant to more like the way you hood a newborn. Almost instantly, Nevaeh's eyes were closed and she was asleep.

"I need to go put her back in her car seat. I left it on the stairs."

Robbie followed her ad she navigated her way through the hallways, giving her directions on if it was left or right more than a few times. Robbie was on his phone as he tailed her, typing rapidly on the screen. Cat assumed he was telling sometime about the return of Caterina Valentine. She didn't know what else he could be talking about.

The car seat was right where she left it, on the stairs she had sat down on after age barely entered the school. She buckled her sleeping daughter into the car seat and slid it over her arm. She was surprised Nevaeh hadn't begun to smell. She hadn't needed a diaper change since a rest stop they had stopped at when they drive to LA earlier that afternoon. That was a good thing, though, because she had left the diaper bag locked away in the car.

Cat took a seat on the stairs once again, inviting Robbie to sit down next to her, which he did.

"What was I like?" cat asked. There had been a million questions forming in her mind for a while and she needed to ask one or two of than before she left. "What happened to me?"

Robbie waited a second before answering; thinking carefully about what he was going to Say. "You were innocent and cute and didn't really have a clue about anything. You were always laughing and singing. You were different, in a good way, like no one I ever met. You were living with your grandmother in Venice-"

"In Italy?"

"No, Venice, California. Anyway, you were living with your grandmother in Venice, California when you disappeared. Since clothes were missing from your closet and you withdrew almost all your money from your bank account and the fact that you randomly decided to graduate high school early, the police had concluded that you had just ran away. They looked for you for a while, after your eighteenth birthday pasted, they slowly stopped. The gang split up shortly after that and I haven't talked to any of them since graduation. They're all still in LA, I know that for sure. Tori's singing career is beginning to take off, Andre is writing sings with and for the famous, Beck has already gotten a job acting on a Michael Bay movie, and Jade's writing all the scripts. And I'm just here, volunteering at my old high school because I have nothing better to do. Even you have DONE SOMETHING, cat. You had a baby. You've accomplished more than I have."

"I'm a 19-year old single mother with no clue about who the behind father even is. I wouldn't call that an accomplishment."

"Still, it's more than I have done. Imagine all the other things you did before you had Nevaeh, when you were free."

Cat wished she could.

She grabbed her phone from her pocket to look at the time. She saw she had more than one unread text message and a few missed calls from Sam. She would call her back when she's driving home to San Diego.

"I better her going," Cat grabbed Nevaeh's car sear and stood up.

"Where are you going? Are you staying in is Angeles for a while?"

"No, I'm going home."

"And when's home?"

"Anywhere," Cat felt the need to keep the town she lived in secret. She didn't know exactly why, but her past self stopped talking to everyone in this other life for a reason and until the day she knows what that reason is, she was going to follow the other her's wishes.

"Do you mind staying for a little while longer?" Robbie held out his Pear phone, which he had been on nonstop for the post while, "I think a reunion might just be about to take place."

That was way longer than I was thinking it was going to be.

I dropped small hints of Cat's old personality all throughout the chapter, because the old goofy may be gone with her memories, but I still want to make sure there's a touch of her still there. I hope you can recognize them.

Thanks for reading!