Hi everyone, here's another chapter of Man Behind The Suits. Please read and reivew.
A big thanks to my beta HydroJen and to all those who reviewed/ favorited/ added it on alert list. Also, I'm sorry for anyone who read this chapter with the blurbs; by mistake, I posted the document which my beta had sent without deleting those comments.
As Ianto went into the bathroom, Jack fixed up the dinner for the two of them. He wondered what he was going to say to Ianto. Brilliant! You've lived a hundred years and now a 21st century guy has got you speechless, he thought sarcastically.
What if I end up hurt him even more rather than helping him? For a moment, Jack contemplated leaving, thinking of sending a therapist over. But somehow, he couldn't. He just couldn't leave the Welshman alone in this state. Ianto was a friend, if nothing more, and Jack had to stand by him in adversity. A therapist could listen to Ianto's problems and prescribe pills to heal his mind and body but to heal the young man's heart was Jack's responsibility.
-XxX-
Ianto sagged against the wall, letting the water fall over his naked form. He'd barely gotten any time to think ever since he'd come home. He'd been so absorbed in his memories of Lisa. Ianto closed his eyes and tried to get the sad thoughts out of his mind. He wouldn't let his weakness show, not in front of Jack, not after that short lapse of lack of self-control.
The Welshman wondered why was Jack doing all this. Why was he even here? What was Ianto supposed to do? There were so many questions and but so little answers. He wondered if his life would ever be right again. Going through the million reasons that Jack could have for coming here, Ianto finally found a plausible one. Now that he thought about it, it seemed obvious, really; Jack was here to Retcon him. That's why the dinner, it won't seem suspicious that way, not to Ianto at least, the team surely knew 's why Jack had brought dinner, it would be less suspicious that way, to Ianto at least. The team surely knew already. That way, I wouldn't have a chance to try and keep my memories, thought Ianto bitterly.
-XxX-
It had been quite a long time since Ianto had gone to the bathroom. Jack was starting to get worried.Owen had warned him about the suicidal tendencies Ianto might experience; what if he was right now? What if- Jack instantly rushed back to the Welshman's bedroom and knocked on the bathroom door, Ianto wouldn't appreciate it if Jack walked in on him showering and he definitely wouldn't approve of the unnecessary damage. He could hear the shower running but that drowned all other sounds.
"Ianto? Ianto, are you there? You okay?" he called out, the panic clear in his voice. "Ianto! Please answer me!"
"I'm fine," Ianto called back, shutting down the shower. "If you thought that I'd drowned in my bath tub or something, then let me tell you that I haven't and I don't have any intention to."
"Oh, okay, thanks. I'll just be waiting for you outside then. The dinner's ready."
-XxX-
When Ianto came to the living room, he found Jack browsing through his CD collection. The Welshman cleared his throat to inform the other man of his presence.
"Oh, you're here, come on," Jack gestured to the dining table, taking in the sight of the archivist in the jumper and t-shirt, his hair still wet from the shower and sticking at odd angles. "I was just looking for a movie to watch."
Ianto took a deep breath and settled down in a chair as Jack took a seat next to him. "Why?" On getting a confused look, Ianto explained himself. "Why all this?" he inquired, gesturing at the dinner. "Why act like this when in the end all you want to do is make me forget?"
"What?" Jack cried out, dumb-founded. "You think I'm gunna Retcon you?"
"You're not?"
"No! Not at all! If I wanted to then I would have done it at the hub itself! I – I just wanted to apologize, I know we all treated you very badly, I- I'm sorry. But I just want you to give me another chance, trust me Ianto, I'll make amends for not paying attention to your requirements. I – Maybe if I'd cared more, you would have found it easier to talk to me about it, maybe we would have found another way, I – I'm just so very sorry Ianto."
"That's not really relevant now, is it?" Ianto replied bitterly. "All that could have been? The truth is that I betrayed you and I paid the price by losing Lisa and now by this suspension, though I don't understand why you're breaking the rules by calling me back to work."
Jack closed his eyes and let out a sigh. "No, you did not betray me. Well, in a way you did, but you yourself said that your loyalty wasn't to me. Killing the Cyberwoman, that wasn't your punishment, nor is this. That Cyberwoman, she wasn't your Lisa, Ianto, she ceased being Lisa the moment she got those implants. She was just using Lisa's memories to get your help. Think about it, would the Lisa you knew have killed people so ruthlessly? Would she have attempted to kill you? Hurt you?"
Ianto shook his head, realizing that Jack was right. He suddenly started shaking. The Captain saw this and wound his arm around the Welshman, placing his other hand on Ianto's cheek. "It's okay, it's okay Yan," he muttered. The Welshman leaned into Jack's touch, too weak to stay put on his own.
"She was using me all along, she never loved me. I – I believed her, I thought she was Lisa, she wanted me, she needed me – she – she said she wanted to be human again – she didn't want to be like that – she -" Ianto mumbled into Jack's chest. The Captain made soothing patterns onto his back, muttering incoherencies into the Welshman's ear.
-XxX-
After dinner, the two sat perched on the sofa watching the ;latest Bond film.
"You said that this suspension isn't a punishment?" Ianto asked suddenly.
"Ianto, you did not commit a crime, all you wanted to do was save someone you loved, so why would there be a need for a punishment?" Jack answered. "I told you to come to work after a month because I wanted you to have time to grieve, time to come to terms with all this. Moreover, you were always at the hub earlier. You're still so young, Ianto, get a hang of normal life. Go out to clubs, bars, societies or whatever, redecorate your flat, make new friends, enjoy life. Make Torchwood your average nine to five job, not a 24 hour thing."
"I've not known anything except Torchwood, not since I left the Uni. I wouldn't know what to do in all this time."
"Hang out with me for a few days then, let me introduce you to a few people. Go out Gwen or Tosh or Owen sometimes," Jack suggested. "He really cares, you know, he'll never admit it but he cares," Jack added when Ianto raised an eyebrow at Owen's name. "If you want, we can go out for lunch somewhere tomorrow?"
"Can we do that some other time, no offense but – "
"Sure, it's fine. I understand. But I'll be here with dinner tomorrow night again, okay?"
Ianto nodded with a slight smile on his face.