Como Va?

Chapter 2: Secret Agent

"'Ey man, how'd you get that scar?"

Skipper rubbed his temples tiredly. It had only been half an hour since the amigos arrival and they were already getting on his nerves. Part of him was glad they'd moved on to Rico, but he knew he couldn't let them stay with him long. Not unless he wanted to hide a few bodies.

He was sorely tempted.

Kowalski cleared his throat, stepping between Rico and the amigos. "Rico doesn't talk a lot," he informed them.

"Doesn't talk?" Ramon repeated before snorting lightly. "No way, man, I can make him talk." He was about to step forward, but Nestor and Rinaldo quickly moved to hold him back.

"Whoa Ramon, remember last time you tried to do that?" Nestor asked, grinning. "You were sore for weeks, man!"

Private cocked his head to the side curiously. "What happened?" he asked. Skipper smacked him on the back of the head, hoping he'd learn quickly not to ask them questions.

"Never mind that," the leader said sharply, turning his attention to the amigos. "Is it safe to assume that none of you have proper military training?"

"Training?" Raul repeated, giving a little snort of laughter. "Not unless you count the, 'boom'." He raised a suggestive eyebrow that made Skipper grimace and smack his forehead. Kowalski covered Private's ears.

"'Ey, speaking of which, where are the chicas around here?" Lombardo asked. Immediately, all five began to look around.

"There are none," Skipper answered harshly, narrowing his eyes.

"What?!" came the chorus from every one of the Adelie penguins.

"No chicas?!"

"What's wrong with you man?!"

"Todes ustedes eras loco!"

"Quiet!" Skipper snapped, not sure he could take all of their voices at once without losing it. Especially if they started speaking other languages "Believe me, you're not going to have time anyways, while you're here."

There was a brief silence as the amigos exchanged glances. Hesitantly, Ramon spoke up. "So like… what kind of training? Like secret agents or something?"

"'Ey, secret agents!" Nestor spoke up. "We can do that!"

Raul jumped forward, dropping his head. The others quickly turned around. Skipper stared with something between curiosity and fear. Obviously, they were in perfect unison with one another, almost reading each other's thoughts, but what were they doing?

He regretted that question when Raul began to sing.

"There is a man that leads a life of danger"

The others began to clap their flippers against their sides in rhythm to the song.

"To everyone he meets, he stays a stranger

With every move he makes

Another chance he takes

Odds are he won't live to see tomorrow!"

Glancing over his shoulder, Skipper could see his teammates' expressions. Kowalski looked something between exasperated and amused. Private was obviously entertained. Rico was simply curious. Turning his eyes back, he saw the other amigos join the song for the chorus.

"Secret agent man, secret agent man!

They've given you a number

And taken away your name!"

"Enough!" Skipper cut them off. When they fell silent, looking at him questioningly. "Don't do that. Ever."

"What, you don't like that song?" Lombardo asked. "We have others."

"No! No songs!" Skipper covered his eyes with one flipper. How was it possible that they were worse than that crazed ringtail? Because there were more of them? Because they didn't just dance, they actually sang?

He paused his thoughts at that, his eyes widening. Julien. He would have to make sure they never met the self-proclaimed lord of the lemurs. That would just end in disaster.

"Uh, what Skipper is trying to say," Kowalski spoke up again, smiling sheepishly at the amigos. "Is that he doesn't like goofing off during such important times.

"Sorry man," Nestor responded. "When the amigos got it going, you can't stop them!"

"Why?" Raul asked and all five of them answered at once.

"Because we're hot!" They each made a sizzling sound, wagging their tails.

Kowalski and Private both coughed into their flippers to hide their chuckles, knowing that Skipper wouldn't appreciate it. Rico snickered out loud, earning a glare from the team leader.

"Geez, what a stiff," Ramon grunted, crossing his flippers in a sort of pout. "You need to lighten up, man!" He hopped closer to the other amigos, throwing his flippers around their shoulders and pulling them closer. "We could show you a good time, man! Back home we're the life of the party!"

"No parties!" Skipper answered immediately. He felt a migraine coming on. "Private, take them into the head quarters," he ordered. "Rico, get them something to sleep on."

Both saluted. The amigos each gave their own mock salute before moving to follow Private into the fishbowl entrance.

"'Ey, not bad," Lombardo commented, peering around the headquarters curiously. A lot of it he didn't understand, but that didn't make him any less curious.

"What's this?" Rinaldo asked, stepping up to the TV. He spotted the buttons on it and reached out, pressing a random one in.

He jumped back immediately when a light radiated from the foreign box, illuminating the entire room.

"Oooo," the amigos chorused as a pair of humans appeared on the TV. All five plopped down in front of it, their gaze fixed on the moving pictures, clearly fascinated.

"That's the tele," Private explained, smiling. "The humans use it to entertain themselves." He rather liked these penguins. Sure they were a little strange, but they were fun.

Rico regurgitated five blankets and five pillows, just dropping them on the ground. Turning his head, he spotted what was on TV. Mythbusters. One of his favorite shows.

When Skipper and Kowalski climbed down the ladder 10 minutes later, they spotted seven penguins sitting around the TV, and Kowalski was quite sure nothing would pull their attention away.

Skipper groaned, rolling his eyes. "Kowalski, options."

Kowalski pulled out his clipboard, beginning to scribble down ideas. "We could get rid of them and dispose of the bodies in the polar bear exhibit."

Skipper tapped his beak in thought, seriously considering it, but… "What else you got?"

"Well… we could train them," Kowalski shrugged. "They'd make a good team, they're already synchronized with one another." He smiled playfully. "In actions and song."

The leader sent Kowalski a dirty look and the taller penguin cleared his throat, trying to cover up his chuckle again. "Any other options?"

"That's all we have until we figure out a plan to get them back. If that's what we do, that is," Kowalski responded carefully.

Skipper glanced toward the amigos. He could see each of their tails wagging as they watched Jamie and Adam blow something up on TV. "Definitely." Sighing, "They'll get up with us in the morning."

Kowalski nodded, giving a small salute. There was a brief silence before the strategies expert smiled nervously. "Uh Skipper, do you think I could, uh…"

Skipper rolled his eyes. "Go."

Kowalski grinned and nodded, moving to join the others in front of the TV.