Note from what I like to call myself sometimes...''the author'': Dear world
I deeply apologise for my absence and therefore lack of updates. I did in fact wish my sister away to some goblins and I had significant trouble negotiating with a certain Goblin King or something to that effect. I hate deadlines, however I do admit that was a lot of time to not update. Squeeb says hi to the fans and he is somewhere deep within the depths of my cupboard. He was gnawing on my Avenged Sevenfold album as he will always remain faithful to Aerosmith. (Thankyou Rachel, a kick up the backside was necessary)
I decided to write a third person perspective on how Jareth is getting on, I thnk he deserves his own chapter at least, he is a king after all.
I love to know what people thing so bring in the !REVIEWS!
Disclaimer: I don't own the Labyrinth yet, however I have a new found faith in my negotiating skills with certain Goblin Kings and intend to use them on the copyright owners. Wish me luck...
Jareth tried flicking his wrist. Then shortly after a snap of the fingers. Failing which a spider man gesture and dancing around manically was in order, however nothing worked. It was true, his powers simply weren't compatible in human mater. Jareth slumped onto the nearest box and settled for a minute. Magic was second nature to him and was always subconsciously done, his crystals worked because he was able to control it from the vicinity of the castle but now he wasn't sure if that was able to work. Three eyes popped up from within the depths of a box named ''The goblinz'' clearly ineptly written by the goblins themselves. This three eyed goblin seemed to have dubbed this box its home and christened it with Jareth's leather glove range.
Five more goblins came running from around the corner and came to an abrupt stop only to observe their masters new profound self. There eyes dilated in confusion and fright as they were used to their master brandishing some weapon or a sharp object flying in their general direction,.but instead he looked distantly into the...floral wall paper and regarded his situation.
….
a few minutes of plotting and scheming later.. he was sitting on top of a pile of boxes which he constructed, attempting to dominate the room, armed with a poker he found by the fire and thought primitively. He figured how former mythical beings coped without the aid of magic. He of course had his minions, not the brightest of the lot, in fact some maybe so stupid they are considered a liability, however they are faithful and he could utilize this to this advantage. Firstly he was going to put the goblins on watch, then he was going to sort his image, he had observed a substantial difference between him and the human kind.
…
Jareth returned home to an empty flat .It was absolutely huge, in fact he was told it was the biggest of the building, he had a jacuzzi and a marble surface kitchen all of which was open plan. He was relatively happy with his new domain, but it wasn't quite ''it'' with out his throne. He would get that sorted sooner or later. It had been a long, long day for Jareth as shopping for an ego as large as Jareth's or simply satisfying vanity as vast as his was going to take a substantial amount of time. This of course was extended monumentally as a 6ft 80's, mythical elf like leather obsessive pervert was wondering the urban jungle of New York equipped with a limitless credit card (constructed at the castle).
Jareth didn't of course return with the most pragmatic of material, but he did however have an ear piercing and one hundred cans of hair spray.
''Stupid goblins, cant follow through with one task I set them, report back as soon as possible I said.'' Jareth sighed and rubbed his scalp, buried deep under his blonde main. He glanced at a broken mirror that his ''minions'' had smashed when under the belief they were fighting with their reflection. He admired the person staring back and pouted as he flexed his muscles. He agreed lot more shopping was in order, as he admittedly enjoyed it. A lot.
…
Jareth was awoken by a tugging of his hair and he grabbed his poker to destroy whatever dared to touch his pride.
''GRRR''. Jareth gave a comical spin but the creature was latched on tightly. Jareth picked off the runt and though it against a wall.
''SQEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEUUUB''.
''that'll teach you'' He muttered and picked off the now rock hard bits of spray that caused Squeeb to stick so fiercely to his hair. Squeeb stumbled and it was clear to Jareth he had something.
''Give that here'' Jareths eyes narrowed and he snarled menacingly
One of squeebs eyes crept unintentionally to the side and stayed there, which gave him a rather insane look. He growled and backed off.
''Here squeeby squeeby sqeebo''
Squeeb jerked his legs in a mentally retarded like fasion and attempted to run. His sense of direction (or lack of it) allowed him to zip in different directions very quickly, which Jareth could have sorted with a swift hand movement, however he had a few tooth brushes and a fire poker. Jareth thought and twiddled his new ear ring which sparked an idea. He took it out and fumbled with the gold and emerald stones that dangled from the ring. He shook it generously and allowed pauses to hear any pitter patter of feet. He heard an unsubtle clanging of dish pans and boxes being desperately pushed over in a bid to follow the noise. Jareth saw Squeeb's eyes light up and his tongue was hanging loosely out of his mouth as he grabbed Jareth's shiny ear ring.
Squeeb dropped what was in his hand and Jareth picked it up quickly whilst Squeeb's attention remained diverted. Jareth hd in his hand an unopened envelope addressed to Sarah. Squeeb had a habit of picking up Sarah's post and occasionally wuld come to the castle with something of use to keep and eye. He opened it rapidly and read . Jareth was quick and he scorned at the letter whilst sharply crushing it in one hand. The letter simply read;
Dear Sarah,
The meal was thoroughly enjoyable
and I will gladly come with you for lunch
yours Jacob x
I think its time I paid her flat a wee visit, and Jareth snarled bearing his white gnashers. Squeeb looked up and squirmed uncomfortablty.
The next day Jareth returned from another days worth of shopping. He enthusiastically smiled and bared his teeth with utter satisfction.
''My oh my isnt human technology absolutely fantastic'' He said this whilst unloading a bag full of spy cameras.
''These humans have a use after all...''