Welcome back! So, a while ago, when I was facing a minor case of writer's block, I figured it would be fun to see September First from Tonks's point of view, rather than Harry's. And so, this was born. It will be very similar to chapters 3 and 4 in A Mishap and an Opportunity, but with some Tonks attitude. Also, a little insight into her feelings for Remus… *smirk* Please read and review! And don't forget to check out the new chapter in A Mishap and an Opportunity.
Back at Hogwarts
Finally, it was September 1st. Tonks had been anxious for this day all month. Not only was she returning to Hogwarts, her second home, but she was returning old enough to be a professor and in the time of the famous Marauders, the pranksters she'd heard so much about during her years there. And as twin "sister" to the boy-who-lived. She glanced over at Harry, who was calmly packing his trunk. He looked a little nervous, but not too much. Tonks, on the other hand, suddenly realized that she'd be in the same year with not just James Potter, but with Remus Lupin, stubborn, self-degrading, mischievous, handsome, thoughtful, caring, young… Tonks cut her thoughts off there, conscious that her hair was changing colors. Again. She cast another envious look at Harry. Brand-new to being a metamorphmagus and barely scraping the surface in Occlumency, and he could already control his morphing better than she could. His longer-than-normal hair was impeccably straight and perfectly black, not a trace of the red she always saw when he was upset or distressed (Tonks guessed the reason for that was an unconscious desire for his parents' presence, especially now that he knew a little more about them). But Tonks had been working on controlling her power for more than ten years and it still got away from her at times.
Frustrated, Tonks threw the last of her things into her trunk, not caring anymore that it was organized. Then she started pacing, needing to burn her excess energy. Her hair was still flying through every color of the rainbow as her stomach churned with nerves.
"Joselyn, relax already! He's just another student," Harry called across the room, a note of annoyance in his voice.
Tonks gave a start. Right. Her name was Joselyn now. And he'd guessed exactly what was going through her head. Of course, the fuchsia hair didn't help things. "I know, but I can't stop wondering and being afraid and missing him and feeling guilty and—"
"Just get your hair on so we can go," Harry cut her off, rolling his eyes. Tonks glared at him for interrupting her, but she was secretly glad he had. Her mouth had an unfortunate tendency to run ahead of her when she was nervous or stressed. And currently she was both. Harry stared steadily back; he was nearly immune to her glares by now.
Finally, Tonks sighed and took a deep breath, letting her features settle into a twin of Harry's. She let the breath out in a long exhale, pushing back her nerves behind her own, immature Occlumency shields—she'd have to brush up on that when she got some free time. Then she finally nodded. "Okay. Let's go," she said, casting a feather-light charm on her bulging trunk. Harry did the same, then the two dragged their trunks down the stairs to the main bar of the Leaky Cauldron.
"Off t' Hogwarts, then?" Tom the barkeep asked as they emerged.
"That's right," Harry replied, grinning. Tonks couldn't help a smile either. The old barkeep had become a friend in the few weeks they'd been there.
"Keep in touch, then, lad, I'll be missin' yer helpin' hands 'round here."
"I will," Harry promised. Then Tom turned to Tonks.
"You, too, lass, eh?" She smiled and nodded.
"Of course. Now we'd best be off. Take care."
"Ay, lass, I will. And you keep an eye on that brother o' yours, alright?"
Tonks grinned while Harry scowled playfully. "I will," she said, raising a hand in farewell as she started for the alley. Harry followed right behind her, and once they were in the alley they apparated to Kings' Cross station with their luggage.
Platform Nine and Three-Quarters looked just the same as Tonks remembered it, and she felt a flood of nostalgia as she laid eyes on the scarlet engine. She felt a smile turn up the corners of her mouth as she and Harry made their way to the train. They figured it'd be best to just get a compartment, as neither of them had anyone to say goodbye to.
Tonks was following a few paces behind Harry, but even so she barely avoided tripping over him when he suddenly collided with another trolley and crashed to the ground. She rolled her eyes, but secretly thanked Merlin it hadn't been her. Merlin knew she was clumsy enough as it was. It was someone else's turn to be the klutz.
"Ugh," Harry grunted as he started to get up. "I'm sor—"
"Watch where you're going, you prat," the other student snapped. "Now you've gone and dirtied my new robes. Mother and Father won't be pleased," he added in an undertone. Tonks snickered. It was just Harry's luck to trip over a Slytherin pureblood, and a prefect, at that, she thought as she caught sight of his badge.
"I'm sorry," Harry said sincerely, glaring at her out of the corner of his eye. He extended his hand down to the boy and helped him to his feet. Tonks felt a shock as she saw the boy's face. He looked just like she remembered Sirius from her childhood, except for the blue eyes (Sirius's were grey). Which meant it was his brother. "I can clean them if you want," Harry continued, gesturing to his wand. The younger Black grunted in affirmation and Harry waved his wand, the dust vanishing with a nonverbal spell. Tonks couldn't help but feel a surge of pride in Harry as her student.
"I'm Harrison Carter, by the way," Harry offered, extending his hand.
"Regulus Black," the other boy replied with a little less ice in his voice. Tonks grinned and shouldered past Harry, extending her hand.
"And I'm Joselyn Carter, twin sister to this prat," she said. Harry directed a grimace at her, but she ignored him.
"Pleased to meet you," Regulus replied, inclining his head as he shook her hand. Then he turned a critical gaze on the both of them. "I don't think I've seen you before. And you don't have any House colors on…"
Fishing for information. Subtle, Tonks thought. "We're transfer students, new this year," she responded, shrugging a little.
Regulus nodded. "Of course," he said formally. "Do you have a House preference?" he asked, casual but pointed.
Harry glanced at Tonks, who shrugged, so Harry answered. "We don't know enough about them to make a choice," he hedged, though his bluff wasn't noticeable. "I, personally, would be okay with anywhere." Tonks nodded her agreement. Regulus seemed pleased.
"I hope to see you around, then. I'm a fifth year, by the way."
"We'll be sixth years," Tonks said, "but we'll keep an eye out for you." She winked teasingly. Regulus nodded once again, then continued on to the train. After a few moments Tonks and Harry followed…
About ten minutes before the train was due to leave—and when Tonks's nerves had returned full force—she heard the compartment door open. She looked up, and her heart skipped a beat. Her cheeks flushed with heat. A sixteen-year-old Remus Lupin entered the compartment, smiling and with his face lit up in a way she'd rarely seen on his older counterpart. She felt like a teenager again with her first crush. It didn't even cross her mind that now she was the older one.
She sensed Harry clench his fists when the next boy entered—a young Peter Pettigrew. She also heard his quickly stifled gasp when the teenaged James Potter walked in, and Tonks had a flash of memory of the same boy, a few years older, who'd come over with Sirius to babysit her once when she was about three. With a jolt, she realized that must have been just before Harry was born.
When the last boy walked in, Tonks felt like someone had hit her with a bludgeoning hex right in the chest. Sixteen-year-old Sirius Black looked almost nothing like the older one she'd known, but at the same time he was so painfully familiar that it was hard for her to stop a sharp gasp, and she was reminded just how much she missed her older cousin.
"What's the hold-up, Prongs?" Sirius's voice was even more familiar. Tonks glanced at Harry. If she hadn't spent a summer with him and watched him relive every horror he'd experienced and try to hide it, she wouldn't have noticed the pain in his expression. But because she did know him, even with a different face, she could tell he was having a difficult time staying composed. "Hey. I've never seen you before," Sirius continued, staring at Harry.
"H-Harrison Carter," Harry replied, and only Tonks noticed the waver in his voice.
"And I'm Joselyn, his twin sister," she added, forcing a smile.
The four boys each murmured greetings as they took their seats, then Sirius fixed his gaze on Tonks. He grinned in what was supposed to be a charming manner. "I am the infamous, irresistible, incredible Sirius Black, and I'm very pleased to meet you," he said, wagging his eyebrows flirtatiously. Tonks barely resisted the urge to gag, but she couldn't help the way her face twisted in disgust. This was her cousin hitting on her! And she was already committed (perhaps one-sidedly, but still!).
The others laughed uproariously as her reaction to Sirius's flirting. "I think that's enough alliterations, Padfoot," Remus said, smiling as he shook his head. Tonks felt her heart skip a beat again, but she forced herself not to flush.
"Yeah. And let the lady be, Sirius. You have to work up to these things," James added, amused. "I'm James Potter," he introduced himself, "and you'll have to excuse this prat. He just doesn't know when to stop."
"And you do, Prongs?" Remus said, grinning as James flushed. Tonks sternly told her heart beat to slow down as she saw the familiar mischievous glint in his eyes that she loved so much. "I'm Remus Lupin."
"Shut it, Moony," James retorted, giving him a good-natured shove.
"Play nice, James. They're new; you have to be a good example if you want to be Head Boy next year," Peter put in. "I'm Peter Pettigrew, and I don't know why I put up with them."
Tonks couldn't help but smile at their interaction. "Good to meet you all," she said, and Harry nodded his agreement. However, she noticed his composure slipping, and she wasn't surprised when a moment later Harry blurted out something about needing the loo and half-ran out of the compartment.
"He must have really needed to go," Peter observed with a slight frown.
Tonks smiled a little and shook her head. "He's just nervous. He's always been kind of shy around new people; you might have just overwhelmed him."
"Is he okay?" Remus asked concernedly, glancing at the door through which Harry had departed.
"Probably. But I should probably go check on him. I'll be back," she said, once more sternly telling herself to calm down. Then she got to her feet and left the compartment, heading down the corridor. She glanced into each compartment in case Harry had fled into an empty one, but the Express was more crowded than she was used to. There had only been about thirty students in her year at Hogwarts across all houses, and about the same for all the other years. But here there seemed to be at least double that number per year.
Tonks walked until she came to the very end of the train. She was about to turn back when she noticed a figure standing outside on the railed platform on the caboose. She pushed the door open and realized it was Harry. She took a few steps forward and put her hand gently on his shoulder. He turned and gave her a slight nod, then turned back. Tonks wasn't especially surprised to notice the moisture in his eyes.
Sympathetic, she moved a little closer and draped her arm around her surrogate brother's shoulders, then spoke softly: "Look, I know this is hard for you, but you can't just up and leave like that. It's impolite and the whole point is not to draw attention to ourselves. They'll start asking questions if you keep staring at James and Sirius with that longing expression on your face."
Harry breathed a ragged sigh. "I know. I thought I could handle it, but then he walked in, and—Then he didn't know me (which I know is the point!" Harry protested to Tonks's look), "and…it was like I lost him all over again. And seeing D-James. I just…I didn't—don't—know how to react."
Tonks barely suppressed a sigh. She understood where he was coming from, she really did. But sometimes she wished Harry would quit being so close-mouthed about what he was really feeling, and stop feeling like he had to deal with everything alone. "You're not the only one, Harry. Sirius was my cousin, and I miss him a lot," she admitted. "But I've tried to separate the two in my head—the Sirius I lost, and the Sirius who has no idea what his future holds except perhaps his next prank or feminine conquest," she explained. "It's a work in progress, yes. But it's working, so far." Tonks just hoped it would keep working.
Harry shook his head without looking at her. "I don't know if I can do that," he said quietly, and she had to strain to hear his voice over the rushing wind from the train's passage.
Tonks gave him a searching look. She doubted he was only reacting to seeing them again. There had to be something else. "Harry…" she trailed off pointedly, waiting for him to explain (because she had learned long ago that trying to force it out of him was a sure way to get him to close off completely).
Harry didn't turn, but she noticed him bite his bottom lip, which seemed to be trembling. "I saw them, last night. In my dreams," he whispered. "I watched them all die, again. How can I pretend everything's okay, when every time I look at them I see them dead?"
Harry's voice cracked and he turned even farther away, so Tonks couldn't even see his face properly anymore. She opened her mouth to say something, then realized there was really nothing she could say. She couldn't really empathize with him. She'd been too young to really remember when James died, and she'd been unconscious when Sirius fell through the veil—she'd had to force the story out of Remus days after the fact before she even knew what had happened.
Suddenly Tonks realized that Harry was trembling under her arm, and he was losing control of his morphing. She'd only seen that happen perhaps twice since he'd discovered his abilities. His hair was shifting between red and black and the deep blue of mourning. With barely a moment's hesitation, Tonks pulled her surrogate brother into a firm embrace, smoothing her hand over his hair the way her mother had always done when Tonks was upset. Harry pressed his face into the shoulder of her robe, his breathing irregular and unsteady.
Though she knew it would do him good to get it all off his chest right at that moment, the Marauders were still expecting her back and she suspected it had been much longer than they'd anticipated. So she tightened her hug on the younger boy—and he was just a boy, despite how much he'd been through, and Tonks felt the instinct, the desire, to protect him, help him, to be there for her little brother. It was intense and strong.
"C'mon, kid. You can do this," Tonks murmured. "Just breathe. Everything will be fine."
She felt rather than heard the ragged breath Harry drew in, and after a few minutes she felt his fist being to loosen around her robe. His breathing was still unsteady, but she felt him relax little by little as he breathed evenly. After some minutes, he finally pulled away, and Tonks squeezed his shoulder as Harry dried the tears that had fallen.
"Just breathe evenly," Tonks instructed. "Get your Occlumency working. And…fix your morph," Tonks added with a smile. His hair had turned completely red. Taking a deep breath, Harry did so. His hair faded back to black, and though Tonks could still see the pain in his eyes, at least he was in control of it. He nodded a bit sheepishly, slightly embarrassed for his loss of control. "Ready to go back?" Tonks asked after another moment.
She saw panic flash across Harry's eyes, but he took a deep breath and nodded. "They're not the same people I know in the future," he said, mostly to himself. Tonks couldn't resist giving him another firm hug before opening the door back onto the train proper and ushering him through.
The rest of the train ride passed without any more incidents, and Tonks could tell Harry was very gradually starting to relax in the other boys' presence. She stayed close to him, though, allowing her shoulder to brush his occasionally when her hands moved with her speech. More than once he gave her a subtle but sincerely grateful look. Finally they arrived. It was the usual chaos of disembarking, and Tonks had to hide her impatience at the careless younger years as they ran up the corridor, anxious to return to the castle. In the chaos Harry and Tonks were separated from the Marauders, but neither of them minded.
As they emerged onto the station, Tonks spotted the carriages, and felt Harry stop short. She followed his gaze and saw the thestrals—as an auror, even a junior one, she hadn't been able to avoid seeing a few deaths. She smiled sadly, having some idea of what he was remembering, and squeezed his shoulder encouragingly. They got a carriage to themselves, and during the fifteen-minute ride up to the castle Harry let his guard down. Tonks felt him hesitantly lean against her, his head on her shoulder, and she squeezed his shoulders reassuringly. It was such a rare thing for him to physically show affection and the trust in the simple gesture meant a lot to Tonks. She just hoped he'd be okay.
When the castle came into view, Tonks had to stifle a gasp. It was so familiar and so magnificent. She felt a sudden wave of nostalgia for her seven years in the castle, and for perhaps the first time found herself grateful that she was being given the opportunity to return. They joined the throng of students heading up to the castle, but instead of joining the majority in the Great Hall, she and Harry lingered in the Entrance Hall to wait for the first years, as the headmaster had instructed. The moment the huge oak doors closed behind them, Tonks felt her heart skip a beat and she felt like a first year again. She intended to hide her metamorphmagus abilities this time, but she still couldn't help the nerves that assaulted her. What if she couldn't hide her morphing? What house would she end up in this time around? What if she didn't fit it? She was six years older than even the oldest students there. What if no one liked her? What if—
A hand on her arm stopped her train of thought, and she looked up in surprise to find herself facing Harry. He looked nervous, and she could tell he was still having a hard time with his memories, but he was giving her reassurance. She offered a weak smile, and Harry squeezed her wrist. She took a deep breath and brought her emotions—and her morphing—back under control.
A moment later they were swallowed by the tide of new first years swarming through the door like excitable insects. Really, they were tiny. Professor McGonagall—who looked the same as always—gave her welcoming speech, and Tonks had to hide her amusement when she realized it was the same one she had heard her very first year at Hogwarts.
When she finished, Tonks and Harry followed behind the line of firsties, and Tonks felt incredibly out of place. She was twenty-two, for crying out loud. What was she doing coming back to Hogwarts? And she just knew everyone would stare. She liked attention, but when every single eye in the Great Hall zeroed in on her—because there was no way they were staring at Harry—she suddenly felt sick to her stomach and she desperately wanted to flee. Her mind was going in overdrive and she couldn't slow it down. Why were there so many people? Why couldn't they look somewhere else? And was that a wolf-whistle?
A hand brushed her arm and she looked over, surprised, to see Harry once again offering encouragement. She felt a surge of gratitude for her surrogate brother, which gave her a little extra confidence. She squared her shoulders, looking directly ahead at where the first years were beginning to be Sorted by the ratty old Sorting Hat.
One by one the new students were placed in their houses until finally it was just Tonks and Harry before the entire student body. Dumbledore stood up and the entire hall went quiet.
"Thank you for your attention. We have two transfer students joining us this year as well, and they will now be Sorted," he said, then he nodded to the Transfiguration professor. She opened the scroll again and red out:
"Carter, Harrison."
As Harry stepped forward, Tonks couldn't help but think, why did he have to go first? Her knees felt weak, standing there alone in front of hundreds and hundreds of students. At least most of them were staring at Harry. He seemed to be arguing with the hat, but finally its brim opened wide and shouted: "Gryffindor!"
Of course. Where else would he go? Tonks thought, but suddenly she felt a surge of fear. What if she didn't get to Gryffindor? She was a Hufflepuff, but she didn't want to be separated from Harry—they needed each other, and their current situation was too complicated for anything to work out if they ended up in different houses.
"Carter, Joselyn," Professor McGonagall announced, and it took Tonks a moment to realize that was her. She walked shakily to the hat and pulled it down over her head, glad it hid her hair because the moment the hat started talking she was certain it went wild.
Oh, my. Another one of you. And I thought one time-traveler was complicated, the hat was saying. And already graduated this time? What are you, thirty? Much too old. I don't know what you were thinking.
Oy! Tonks protested. I'm only twenty-two!
Ah, you've got fire. But your loyalty and sense of fair play is stunning. You'd certainly do best in your original house, Hufflepuff.
Don't you dare send me there, Tonks threatened, or I'll incinerate you!
Violent, too. Quite brazen. That's a Gryffindor attitude for certain. But perhaps that isn't the best place for you… There was a long pause and Tonks heard nothing but her own pulse roaring in her ears for what felt like an eternity.
Quite a lofty goal you have, Miss Tonks. I do believe there's enough ambition in you to send you to Slytherin—
Tonks barely stifled a gasp and she felt all the color drain from her face. Don't send me there, she thought, shaking her head frantically. I won't last a day with that lot! They'd all want to murder me!
Afraid, are you? Even less of a fit for Gryffindor than I thought.
Just send me with my brother, you worthless lump of canvas!
The hat huffed in annoyance. Very well. I guess I must send you to: "Gryffindor!"
Tonks let out a breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding, took a second to make sure her morphing was intact, then she removed the hat and handed it back to McGonagall before taking the empty seat beside Harry at the Gryffindor table. He hugged her in greeting and congratulations, and Tonks returned it firmly, relieved they'd been allowed to stay together. Then Dumbledore announced the start of dinner. Exchanging a grin with her surrogate brother, Tonks tucked in with gusto, famished from not eating anything all day now that her stomach was no longer tied in a knot of anxiety.
Eventually the meal ended, leaving Tonks feeling pleasantly full, and she started to feel excited for term to start. She was also immensely curious about where the Gryffindor common room was and what it looked like, so she paid close attention to the route they took—because Harry refused to tell her anything. She knew it was in one of the towers, but after the fourth staircase Tonks was wondering if she oughtn't to join Harry more often in his morning exercises, since she was out of breath. Finally, they reached the seventh floor and the group halted in front of a portrait she'd passed occasionally during her explorations in her first and second years at Hogwarts. Someone ahead of them spoke a password—which was odd for Tonks, since all seven years she'd been in school, she'd had to tap barrels in the correct rhythm or risk getting sprayed with vinegar. The password was cour de leon, and Tonks knew enough French to know that meant "heart of the lion." She tried not to scoff incredulously. Such a predictable password for the House whose symbol was the lion. Then all thought ceased as she laid eyes on the common room.
It was perfectly circular, though not without its alcoves and corners. Several huge, cozy-looking sofas and chairs surrounded the fire and were scattered in small groups throughout the room. There was a large window a little to her left with a wide windowsill decorated with cushions and pillows. The entire room was also decorated in red and gold. Red carpet, red sofas with gold trim, gold-and-red-patterned curtains. It was a little like walking into a furnace, especially since it was a lot warmer than she'd anticipated, for being in a tower. There were two staircases to either side that Tonks assumed led to the dorms.
The entire room was also full of chatter, and virtually all the seats were taken but for the window seat she'd spotted earlier. Suddenly Tonks began to feel a little claustrophobic, and her eyes darted from corner to corner, noting entrances and exits, possible threats, possible weapons. Her hand tightened on her wand as she realized just how out of her depth she was. Too old to be a student, too young to be a professor, completely out of her time, and surrounded by people who were more than likely dead in her own time—because of course all the Gryffindors would fight in the war. Tonks's breath came faster and her earlier nerves returned full-force. She was just about to go into a full-blown panic attack when a familiar hand gripped her wrist.
Tonks turned and saw Harry giving her a reassuring and understanding smile, and she felt herself relax. Until that moment, she'd always assumed she would be the one to support Harry, but apparently she needed him, too. She couldn't help but be glad they'd ended up there together, because Tonks would have no idea what to do on her own.
Harry then tugged gently on her wrist and she followed him toward the window seat she'd noticed before. Before they got there, though, they were surrounded.
"Harrison, mate! Welcome to Gryffindor!" Sirius clapped Harry on the shoulder enthusiastically, but with enough force that he stumbled forward a little.
"You have been invited into the Marauder's Den," James continued with a grin. "To be accepted, you must undergo a series of tests and extensive questioning."
"You must prove your Gryffindor bravery and loyalty and swear yourself into the service of Godric the Great!" Peter added with a matching grin, and Tonks snorted in amusement.
"In other words, they want to interrogate you as to where you came from, why you transferred, and what Quidditch team you follow," Remus interrupted mildly, an amused smile on his face. Tonks's heart skipped a beat and she forced herself not to blush, because he was right by her shoulder, she could feel his body heat, her eyes were glued to the slight upward turn of his lips…
"Moony! You ruined it," Sirius broke in, and his voice was so downtrodden that Tonks snapped out of her…whatever that was, and couldn't help but snicker.
"Yeah. It took ten whole minutes to come up with our welcoming speech!" James said petulantly, and Tonks saw Harry trying to hide a smile as he rolled his eyes.
"But Remus is right," Peter said. "We want to get to know you. If you're lucky, you might even get inducted into our exclusive club." The smaller boy's eyes were dancing with mirth.
"What about me?" Tonks asked, making her lower lip jut out and her eyes extra big and watery. "Or do I not matter?"
Harry choked on a laugh as Sirius elbowed his way past James and threw an arm around Tonks's shoulders. She tensed. "Why, Joselyn, I thought you'd never ask. We are ever so curious about you as well. But of course, you don't need to pass a test to be welcomed into our Den anytime," he said, waggling his eyebrows.
"Oi! That's my sister!" Harry protested as Tonks grimaced and shrugged Sirius off, not bothering to hide the look of disgust on her face. Sirius was clearly affronted, and the others snickered. Tonks winked at Harry, grateful for his intervention and his words.
"Give it up, Padfoot," James said, shaking his head in mock despair. "But really, Harrison," he added, looking at Harry. "We want to know your story."
"And I can't wait to hear all of yours. I'll be up in a bit. I just want to talk to my sister for a minute. This is all a bit overwhelming; we need some mutual moral support," Harry said with a grin.
"All right. We'll be waiting," James replied with an answering smile. Then he herded the other three up to the dorm. Tonks shook her head at their antics as she and Harry finally sat down by the window.
"Thanks for sticking up for me, Harrison," Tonks teased once they were seated, winking. Harry made a face. "And to your godfather, as well. I know I'm in safe hands with you, dear brother."
"It's creepy," Harry replied. "I want to stop it before it gets creepier." Mischief glinted in his eyes. "I already have to wonder if you'll be my sister or my mother once you and Moony get together; no need to add potential godmother as well."
Tonks couldn't entirely stop the blush that darkened her cheeks at his words, but she knew there was no point arguing. She shook herself mentally and offered a sincere smile. "I do appreciate the sentiment, though," she answered, and Harry flushed slightly at the praise. Tonks hid a frown—he really needed to get used to accepting compliments. She'd have to work on that with him. A few seconds passed in silence and Harry's expression turned stiff. "How are you doing?" she finally asked.
"I'm trying not to think about it," Harry answered. "I'm starting to separate them in my head, but it's going to take some time."
Tonks put her arm around his shoulders, seeing how uncomfortable he was. "Don't stress about it. Just be yourself and it will all come together eventually."
Harry nodded, then seemed to remember something. "Are you okay? You were pale as a sheet during your Sorting."
"That's none of your business," Tonks said, only half-teasing. She hated admitting weakness, and she didn't feel like discussing where she almost ended up.
Harry raised an eyebrow in an expression that almost mirrored one that Remus always made. It was almost painful. "You can hardly expect me to tell you everything if you don't plan on talking to me. I'm pretty sure that's not how sibling relationships work."
"Well, since both of us are an only child, I couldn't tell you that," Tonks replied, trying to distract him.
She should have known better. "It goes for friends, too," Harry pointed out, and she finally sighed.
"All right. The hat recognized me as a time traveler. Made a few snide remarks about being twenty-two and returning to Hogwarts. It was quite rude, actually," Tonks said, scowling. "But…it was determined to put me in Hufflepuff again. I didn't want to go. It'd be too hard to work together since there are hardly any classes shared between Gryffindor and Hufflepuff. So it asked me if I'd prefer it in Slytherin." Tonks shuddered involuntarily, remembering the looks the Slytherin table had given them as they entered the Great Hall, especially after their last name was read—clearly not a wizarding name. "Those Slytherins terrify me. Other than Regulus, all the older years seem evil. Snape is probably just as unpleasant now as he is in the future. But I recognized most of them as Death Eaters." Did she ever. "Hell, I've dueled with several of them as an auror. I wouldn't survive even one night in the snake pit without cursing them into oblivion—or being cursed myself."
"I don't blame you for not wanting to go to Slytherin," Harry said while Tonks caught her breath. She always spoke quickly when she was nervous. And she tried to move quickly as well, which was why she was so clumsy at times, and even worse when she was uncomfortable. "I don't have anything against the house," Harry continued, "just the people in it. And right now, the majority of them are…unsavory, to say the least."
Tonks snorted without amusement. "'Unsavory' indeed. Are you going to be okay?" she asked suddenly, realizing that it had been a while and the Marauders were probably anxious to interrogate their new dorm mate.
Harry shrugged, looking nervous again. "I have to face them sooner or later. Might as well get it over with. You can come if you want, though. I doubt they'd mind, and then the interrogation can go twice as fast."
Tonks smirked. "Nice try, Potter," she answered, lowering her voice. "They'll be your friends more than mine. And I have roommates who want to get to know me, too. Haven't you noticed them glancing over here?" Three of the girls she'd seen sitting by the fire when they first entered had been periodically glancing their direction.
Harry glanced over where Tonks had gestured with a jerk of the head. Then he blushed and ran a hand awkwardly through his hair. "I think some of them are looking at me," he muttered, looking away, his cheeks still tinged red. Tonks grinned and glanced over and saw he was right. One of the girls, the one with short, honey brown hair, looked like she'd just looked away and her cheeks were a little pink. Tonks assumed she and Harry had accidentally made eye contact, though that meant she'd been staring.
"This will be a fun year, then," she teased, winking. If she didn't already consider Harry her brother and if she didn't already have a crush on Remus, she might pursue him—Harry didn't know it, but with all the training and the style changes he'd made over the summer, he'd become quite attractive, and his shyness was only endearing.
"Get out of here, Jos," Harry answered, shaking his head and giving her a gentle shove toward the group of girls. Tonks smiled at the nickname.
"Very well. Good luck with the Marauders," she answered. Harry rolled his eyes, but stood and headed toward the staircase into the boys' dorms. Tonks got to her feet as well and went to join the girls by the fire. She tried not to worry too much about Harry—the boys were bound to unintentionally bring up difficult questions. Instead she summoned her inner social butterfly and made for the open seat beside the auburn-haired girl with eyes just like Harry's—Lily Evans. And tripped over the edge of the rug, falling ungracefully across Lily's lap and banging her elbow on the table.
"Sorry," Tonks muttered, forcing her hair not to turn red with her embarrassment. "I've always been a klutz, and it's even worse when I'm nervous." She forced a smile as she got to her feet.
"Sounds like Alice," said the girl who had been staring at Harry. "She trips over her own feet." The other girl with light brown hair blushed.
"Mary!" the girl protested.
"Then I suppose we'll have to take the fall together. Pun intended," Tonks replied, successfully taking the seat beside Lily. All four of the other girls laughed. "I'm Joselyn, by the way, in case you forgot since the Sorting," she added, having to remind herself to use her pseudonym.
"I'm Lily Evans, prefect, and this is Alice Smith, Mary McDonald, and Marlene McKinnon." Tonks had already deduced who Alice and Mary were. The last girl, Marlene, reminded her of a female Sirius. She had aristocratic features, clearly pureblood, with sleek black hair at least as long as Tonks was wearing hers at the moment. She was even dressed similarly, in black jeans and a trendy shirt. Her Hogwarts robe was slung over the back of her seat. Then Tonks looked down at herself—her Weird Sisters t-shirt, black jeans, and combat boots. Then she looked back at Marlene, who had also noticed the similarity in their wardrobe choices.
"Oh, honey, we're going to be best friends," Tonks said with a grin.
Marlene nodded, smiling back. "You'll have to show me what else you have. I have a feeling I'm going to like it."
"I suppose it's only fair," Lily broke in, smiling as well. "Marlene won't wear any of our clothes, but Mary, Alice, and I share all the time."
Tonks smiled, almost glad now that she'd had to buy a whole new wardrobe from this time period—it meant her clothing wouldn't give her away. "Definitely," she replied.
"So where are you from?" Lily asked.
Tonks shrugged. "The outskirts of London. Nowhere special. You?"
"Cokesworth," Lily replied with a shrug.
"Were you homeschooled before?" Mary inquired.
"Yeah. Then my brother and I decided to transfer to Hogwarts."
"What for? You could have finished homeschool and taken your NEWTs without ever setting foot here," Mary pointed out.
Tonks tried not to cringe and remembered that Harry would be having a much harder time with that question than she was. She just didn't know how to answer without bluntly stating that she was supposedly an orphan twice over, and she didn't particularly want the pitying looks she was sure to get—especially since it wasn't even true. "Just wanted to try something new," she finally said.
"What did your brother think of it?" Marlene asked.
"He's nervous, but so am I, so that's no surprise there. It'll be an adjustment, but otherwise we're both looking forward to it," Tonks replied. Finally, something that was true.
"Your brother…he's kind of cute, isn't he?" Mary asked hesitantly, her cheeks flushing again. Tonks hid her smirk.
"Is he? I haven't noticed. He still looks like a scrawny teenager to me," she replied with a shrug. She realized that she wasn't alone in hiding her amusement. Marlene didn't bother to hide it.
"Does someone have a crush?" she teased, poking Mary in the side. Mary squeaked and stammered out a protest that left the rest of them laughing.
"My advice, if you do decide to pursue him, is to take it slow and be patient. He doesn't open up easily to others," Tonks finally said once the laughter died down. She highly doubted Harry would be interested in any romance in this time, but it wouldn't hurt if he let himself have a little fun.
"He's shy?" Alice asked. "He didn't look like that to me. He seemed pretty self-assured."
"Yeah. If I recall correctly, he was comforting you while you were waiting to be Sorted," Marlene added, smirking at Tonks, who morphed away an embarrassed flush.
"He's friendly and confident, but when it comes to the deeper stuff he tends to shut himself off. It's a chore for me even to get him to tell me what he's really feeling sometimes," Tonks explained. She barely kept herself from glancing toward the boys' dorms, wondering how his interrogation was going. Knowing the Marauders—well, Sirius and Remus at least, and from what she'd heard about James—it was either very superficial and full of teasing and jokes, or it was way too personal and prying.
"I hope he fares okay with those idiots in his dorm," Lily murmured.
"Idiots?" Tonks asked, feigning ignorance.
"Don't mind her—she hates all of them, except for Remus. He's the other sixth year prefect, by the way," Marlene said bluntly.
"Who are they?"
"The two with black hair are James Potter and Sirius Black. Remus Lupin is the other prefect, like Marly said, and the shorter one is Peter Pettigrew," Mary explained.
"They're a group of pranksters who don't care who they target—including each other."
"I pity your brother, actually."
"What for? That's right up his alley. Well, to be honest, it's mostly me, but he gives as good as he gets. He's pretty handy with a wand," Tonks said, unable to help bragging a little. She probably hadn't told him, but she was actually quite proud of her surrogate brother, and she wanted him to know it, and she wanted others to know it.
"Brilliant," Lily grumbled. "Hopefully he's got more sense than Potter and Black and can keep them in line."
Tonks shrugged. "Only time will tell." Then she stifled a huge yawn. "It's getting late. Do you think we should turn in?"
"You're right. We have classes in the morning," Alice replied for Mary, who hid a yawn of her own. The others nodded, then the group of girls got to their feet and headed upstairs to their dorm.
Tonks found her bed second from the window, between Lily and Marlene. The other three were across the room, the beds arranged more or less in a circle. It was different from the Hufflepuff dorms, where each student had their own alcove that could be closed off with curtains. Here it was very open, and Tonks was glad she was comfortable in her own skin—however often she used to change it when she was younger—because there wouldn't be much privacy in this dorm. Marlene and Alice took the two showers right away, and Tonks decided to leave her own until morning—she really was exhausted. She changed quickly into her pajamas and cleaned her teeth with a spell, since the bathrooms were occupied. Then she crawled into bed and called a good night to the other girls. Within twenty minutes, even with the shower running and the rustling of clothing and the occasional slamming of a trunk lid, Tonks was fast asleep.